I would have come back with a snarky response. But also my husband wouldn’t be friends with the dude if he said that. It’s all about respecting someone’s spouse. That sort of comment is disrespectful. Regardless if it was a joke or not you just don’t say that about someone’s wife especially your friends wife. Boundaries. He wouldn’t want his friend saying that about his future 21 yr old daughter.
To each their own… If it offends you…tell your husband…its possible the husband was just surprised he said it with you on speaker phone…regardless if it’s been 6 months and nothing else has happened I think you pry overreacted… Choose your battles and realize this is his friend and obv your husband cares for him…do you not have any crazy friends that say off the wall stuff? I guess I just think these women are blowing it outa proportion … It was a comment …leave it at that
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I think you’re over reacting 
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If you’re continuously complaining about the same situation you need to drop it… If its recurring…address it
Lots of your husbands would continue being friends with men that say this btw…don’t be naive
I’m gonna ask my husband what his response would have been if this were us… I’m tipping the bloke wouldn’t be standing much longer… some things shouldn’t be joked about…
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Well if your husband isn’t going to stick up for you, you need to do it tell his friend that you found the comment he made you over six months ago very inappropriate and it made you uncomfortable. I would have yaken it as a joke. Thats how my ex husband and his friends were. It’s whateve. Even my current bf and i.
Everyone needs to chill out lol it was a dumb ass remark made by a dumb ass
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I think she just wants the husband to defend her and to agree with her that it’s inappropriate if you would have addressed the issue with his friend when the comment was made there would be no problems afterwards but the problem is he apparently doesn’t see a problem with it. If I were her I would express my dislike for the comment and for the front and then let it go and if it happens again in the future then that has been at that point in time needs to step up and say something. Or the wife can be a big girl and say something herself. I don’t think it’s anything to end a marriage over unless it continues to happen. Then I wouldn’t want to be with a man who lets people blatantly disrespect me.
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As the representative of the male population, I say kick your husband to the curb. The reason his friends are like that is because he dont respect you.
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Your husband is a different level of unbothered, trying to see the positive maybe by your actions you made him feel so secure he doesn’t care what’s said! Still mad disrespectful tho from this friend👏🏽
Michael Daugherty the comments are so divided
I would have said yeah and I could also light myself on fire but that’s not going to happen either.
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Though this comment was inappropriate, especially with your child in earshot, I believe this to have very little to do with YOU. The friend said this to razz your husband… knowing it WILL NOT happen. It’s just his way of saying that payment isn’t necessary and won’t take place. But guys often tease each other. You know how the cut each other down all the time (you’re ugly/fat/stupid/suck at ABC…) and women would NEVER say those things to their friends? This is similar. Let it go.
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If any man husband or BF whomever didn’t at least say “wtf man!” Nope he ain’t for me.
If you wanted something said you should have said something yourself. A lot of guys joke around like that with each other. Your husband isn’t a mind reader, so how would he know it upset you that he didn’t say anything if you didn’t tell him? Why is the burden of defending YOU solely on him? Speak up for yourself 
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Well, if I were you, I would have cussed the hubby’s friend out for disrespecting you like that.
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My husband would say “If I hear you disrespect my wife and MYSELF like that again, you’re gonna wish you hadn’t”! My husband has had coworkers say some pretty nasty and disrespectful things, to his face, about what they would “do” with me. It doesn’t end well!! And they never do it again!
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Naw my husband don’t play that one of his friends joke my said I was hot and should be w him and they played like that but w friends not a wife and he shut him down right there the friend don’t even come over 
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I get it was a haha joke but I would feel some type of way about it at first. Honestly I would have been more upset at the fact my child heard it. But I would get over it.
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My man would’ve knocked his teeth out.
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You should have immediately called his friend out right there.
Also, tell your husband how disrespected you feel by this guy. Sit down and tell him how you feel.
Oh my goodness I would have laughed . Some guys are just gross and some are funny gross. Maby you don’t know him well enough but obviously your husband does .i am not trying to be rude but what’s that point of being so uptight over it?
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How about you stand up for yourself?
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Some of you commenting are clearly way too feminist and don’t know how to take a joke
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He thought he was funny is what I’m thinking & may not have meant it literally. Not funny or appropriate to me either.
You should of said no thanks I have some respect but my husband will give you one! See his reaction then
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Girl, grow up 
And if you have an issues with him, be an ADULT and say something to him yourself.
It’s not your husband’s place to speak for you.
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That’s not a joke that’s degrading & disgusting & his friend sounds like a disrespectful pig. My boyfriend would of corrected that real quick, my boyfriend has a lot of guy friends and none of them have ever spoken about me in that way, that’s just plain ignorant. He should be keeping his sick joke to him self, I would definitely address his friend as well if I where you & let him know he should not be talking about you in that way & not to do it again, because that’s not a joke to you.
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I’d cuss him out myself AND take it as a huge sign of disrespect on my husband’s part that he still chose to be friends with this person. Time to put both dudes in check.
People saying let it go and that’s how men talk… are you kidding me? That’s completely disrespectful. On every level and I’m sorry if that’s “ok” by you. 1st off, you should stand up for yourself and not let anyone speak about you like that. My husband would have turned the car around and went str8 to his house. Know ur worth, don’t let anyone disrespect you like that
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If you don’t stand up for yourself then no one else is…
I would have stuck into this jerk and said something that would have embarrassed the shit out of him…Let him know that he is a pig and no wonder he doesn’t have a woman …Dirtbag…Tell him to go suck a bag of dicks and see how he likes it.
I’m sorry sweetheart that was totally inappropriate, but we live in a world of idiots, I would tell you husband and this man how disrespectful this was and this is no reflection on you, it is a reflection of the culture we live in today if he does it after this issue your husband an ultimatum
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My husband would be dragged this man out of his house and kicked his ass! Spit in yiur fave that he even continues to talk to him! Sorry but u married a punk!
Her husband ABSOLUTELY should address it on her behalf. He is supposed to be her rock and protector. Idk why any man would be okay with another dude saying that about his woman, wife or not. That’s just blatant disrespect PERIOD.
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As a husband this wont Fly. I dont care if ur my brother that’s not happening. I know guys who dont care cause it’s a chick they r sleeping with but never baby moms and wife. My peoples know better to play with me like that. Plus if I dont catch something and my wife says something to me and is uncomfortable. Best believe I’m shutting it down for my queen and my man hood in that order
I personally wouldn’t care, I’d just laugh it off and probably come back with something witty and demeaning. But yes innapropriate in front the child. But that’s my opinion. You just do what you feel is right and I hope you and your husband can sort it out.
Tell him you’ll take him up on the offer and maybe that will wake your husband up. Your husband could have at least made a casual comment, “Nah dude, she’s all mine. I don’t share.” of he was concerned about being rude to the pig.
Something should have been said if it made you uncomfortable. Either by him, or you. But if you do it he needs to defend and back you up should the friend try to play it off.
That would make me really uncomfortable, my husband knows it, and he would say something as he knows I hate confrontation. But if he didnt and I pointed out how inappropriate I thought it was, he would make sure it didn’t happen again, at the very least.
People make inappropriate comments often as we all have different levels of what is and isnt okay, and if you dont know someone’s comfort level that can easily happen. However, you should be able to learn what is and isnt okay and react as such. So, I wouldn’t immediately say he can’t be friends with this guy,if he’s respectful of my levels after that, then who cares. If he continued to disrespect me though then I would talk to my husband about how uncomfortable he makes me. Though if someone continuously disrespected me I don’t think he would associate with t,hem anyway.
Bottom line - talk to both of them. It sounds like neither had any idea how this made you feel so you can’t be upset with them. We as people aren’t mind readers and treating them as such is just as bad.
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🤦 its guy talk and a joke i woulda responded u wish
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Unfortunately that’s just the way your husbands friend talks. If you where offended at the time you should of spoke up when it happened, and everytime after till he apologizes to you and you feel comfortable. Your husband knows how his friend is and should have never put him on speaker phone.
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Inappropriate, yes. Harmless joke, also yes. Depends on your sensitivity level. I would have piped in with, “Yeah, don’t hold your breath, buddy.”
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Honestly I’d tell him in front of my husband that he is to no longer talk about you like that or be disrespectful. Then I would let my husband know if front of him that if he wants to be friends with him still that’s on him but neither you or your kids will have anything to do with him whatsoever
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Just sounds like a harmless joke really 
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tell him thanks for the sex ed for you 5 year old 
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I would say something to him. “Hey nasty, I was disgusted disrespected and creeped out when you made your creepy disgusting comment. If you ever do that shit again I’m going to hit you in the back of your head with a frying pan knock you unconscious and when you wake up your penis will be in your own mouth. Capeesh?”
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If your husband dont punch him in his mouth then you’re married to a woman
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Your husband didnt offer you over in exchange for payment…and bluetooth would imply he had no idea who was in the car…chill out
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While I’m shocked he said it on speaker (did he know he was on speaker?) a lot of guys joke with their friends like that. It’s up to your husband to say “yeah, let’s not talk about my wife that way.”
Regardless, if it made you uncomfortable you have a right to say so and it sounds like you did. I wouldn’t expect my husband to give up a friend over a comment like that, though. I don’t necessarily like the comments like that or approve of them, but it was a joke. A distasteful joke, but a joke.
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I would have defended myself regardless. Maybe he didn’t know you were in the car which regardless it was inappropriate. But in your husband not defending you seems like they joke like that often. I would confront my husband because he’s the one that shouldn’t have taken that lightly.
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I would of made a crude remark back like sure if you actually had something down there
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Someone should let him know that THAT is probably why he is still single. That is not family man material.
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Highly disrespectful, I see nothing funny in this “joke” !
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The questions asked on here make me wonder how some of you even made it this far through life. Jesus.
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Then don’t come here for the advice actually deal with the damn situation if it bothers you lmfao.
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You’re being disrespected because your husband allows it. He doesn’t even respect you himself, sorry.
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All I know is joke or not, my husband would have shut that shit down!!
And I have a very dirty sense of humor, I don’t find this funny.
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Omg quit being so uptight!! Get over it!!! It sounds like its all fun n games you know something called a joke a sense of humor!!
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Rude the husband should’ve said something in defense of his wife. What kind of friendship do they have that his friend would even think a comment like that is acceptable? My wife is my wife & I do not share in anyway. It’s one thing to joke dirty it’s another when it is your wife. Period
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Tell your husband it bothered you but men joke like that all the time you can either ignore it or throw it back. He probably didn’t know he was on speaker so he wouldn’t have known the kid heard him. If he does it constantly then sure it could be an issue but no use forcing your husband to get rid of a friend because of a joke
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If your husband won’t defend you…you have bigger problems!
Defend yourself if he won’t! But don’t be disrespected by anyone…especially someone that would say that to a married woman and her husband! He sounds like a jerk! Need to tell your hubby, if he won’t defend you…then he might end up single along with his jerk of a friend🤷🏼♀️
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Every male I know jokes like this it can be just a joke .
If your so hurt about it maybe start thinking to why you feel this way why you are hurt and can’t take a joke .
Males can be grose do not punnish your partner because you are sensitive
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I dont see what his relationship status has to do with it. It’s a joke harmless joke, your husband can speak to his mate who made a joke. Some of you ladies need go calm down, I’m sure he didnt mean to say it whilst the kid was around
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My husband would break ties or I would break ties with him!!! Plain and simple!
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Nope, highly unacceptable! Then, again I demand respect. My husband would never talk to me like this infront of anyone! Let alone let or keep in contact with anyone comfortable enough to disrespect me.
Some woman might think it’s all fun and games to get talked that way. I was raised completely different. In my family and in my circle of friends we have joking and sarcasm this kind of dark humor crosses the line.
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My husband would never allow a man to say this to me! It’s called respect joke or no joke!!
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i have’nt had that happen with the dirty remarks but my bf of 10 yrs lets his grown son disrespect me all of the time,its like he’s afraid of him and im sick of it .I would be really pissed if one of his friends disrespected me with sex remarks like that. and he did’nt put him in his place.
I mean yes it probably was just a joke, but if you’re uncomfortable with those jokes then you should let your husband know and he should be the man and tell his friend that you dont like that.
My man and his friend always joke about dumb things and it doesnt get to me but I definitely understand you! Like i said if you didnt like it, tell your husband. Especially since your kid was in the car. And next time let him know that hes on speaker and your kid is there because not everyone is going to assume your kid is right next to you.
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Hard to tell what her husband says to him 
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WOW! I Can tell you that your husband must not have much respect for you if he is still friends with this asshole and you must not have much respect for yourself for NOT speaking up when the ASSHOLE friend said that. You nor your husband not speaking up at the time this 
occurred only means neither of you could care less what the friend said. You made your 
now sleep 
in it my dear. OR you should call that so called friend of your husbands and tell him he’s a 
and to Fuck off. It’s your choice.
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I had a similiar thing happen to me. A ex boyfriend’s friend made a comment about me showing my boobs to him. I complained. Ex boyfriend said it was a joke. I put my foot down and told the ex he could have his friend. Even ex’s Mom said it was a horrible thing to say so now we all know why he is an ex boyfriend.
People who don’t have kids aren’t aware of watching what they say, he probably didn’t realize the kid was listening. I’d tell the dude myself to stfu or I’ll throat chop his ass. If it continues then hubby needs to say something. Idk, I have tough skin and things like that don’t bother me too much.
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If your husband doesnt defend you then he doesnt care and sees you as the same cheap trash his friend does. STAND UP FOR YOURSELF. Be a woman who isnt walked on and say something to this pervert and your shit husband.
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Lol alot of women who are claiming that this isnt normal, apparently hasn’t hung out with alot of guys it’s not sexualizing her it’s a joke and he probably meant it towards his bud and didnt think she had heard lol
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I think it’s rude and inappropriate but I don’t think you should tell him he can’t be friends with him. He was making a joke, not a very good one but I would just let your husband know that it made you feel uncomfortable and that he should tell his friend that it made you uncomfortable. Some people are vulgar and rude. We just have to put boundaries up and let them know it isn’t welcome.
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My husband use to work with a bunch of guys that always talked like that. Even about me…it never bothered me. I would typically hit em back with a joke of my own. I guess it all depends on your personality.
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Why couldn’t you or why wouldn’t you of defended yourself??? You don’t need any man to go to bat for you…GAADAM
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I feel like if your husband truly respected you, he would have defended you and not allowed a comment like that to be made… even if it’s in so called “fun”.
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It was said of the cuff without thinking. You husband should have told him that his remark upset you and could he apologize. If not then it would be best to not have a relationship with him. If he is truly sorry the you could let it go
Just because every dude does this doesn’t make it appropriate. It’s immature and uncalled for. Smh all the women defending such disrespectful behavior. That husband needs to stop being a coward and letting men objectify his wife.
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I would say if it made you uncomfortable to maybe mention it to him next time he says something like that to you… Simply say I would appreciate if you wouldn’t make those types of “jokes” about me. Set your own boundary with him.
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Jokes between my husband and his friends are not my business, until it crosses a line like this. Had someone said this about me, in front of my husband, whether I was present or not, my husband would’ve put the person in their place.
Whether it was a joke or not, once you expressed your distaste of said joke, your husband should have said something.
Even if my husband thinks some things I get upset about are not a big deal, if I tell him I’m upset, he does his best to make sure the issue is never an issue again. Same respect should have been given to you.
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No no no if it were me I’d leave since my husband wanted to stay in touch with the guy I would not allow to be disrespected and neither should you
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You have a weak husband a real man defends his woman and what else has been said that you don’t know about to make his friend think that it’s ok to speak about you that way there’s a difference between a joke and an insult disguised as a joke
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I personally do not think that he meant that you literally had to give him a blow job. Unfortunately men joke about the nastiest and uncalled for things. Their mindset is different than ours. While no I am not agreeing with what he said, I guarentee that the conversation of what his friend said, has come up between your husband and his friend. I dont know if you’re expecting him to make his friend apologize to you or you’re wanting him to no longer be friends with him. Either way, maybe put your foot down that it was inappropriate, especially being in front of a kid, and the next time, you will refuse for the friend to be around.
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LOL if that’s all he said in front of you… you won’t like what they say when they’re hanging out together. Things like that shouldn’t be said in front of a child though, but he might not have realized he was saying it in front of a child.
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While I agree this is pretty gross and in appropriate, guys are this way. They best way to combat it in my opinion is throw one back at him. Either give it back as a joke or say enough to embarrass him so he won’t again. My response would’ve been “Small parts are a choking hazard” 
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Personally have had that said once or twice in my first marriage until I was a smart ass back and said for 100 buck sure. It shut him up.
Or said I don’t.like mushrooms
The joke was probably directed at your husband and the way some guys talk! It was harmless! Just move on! Friends like that will always be sincere! He didn’t charge you and seems that has a good relationship with your husband! He may be the one that he talks dirty stuff too! Let him be!
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I would of said in your dreams and try that kind of comment again you’ll be needed a new part as a child being in the car, I wouldn’t need my husband to step in as I’d make it clear myself what I think to both of them
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Regardless of whether your husband spoke up or not. You should have definitely put this person in their place. No matter who he is.
It’s not hard to say;
Excuse me; I find what you just said very inappropriate and I will not allow to be talked about in this way. Ever!
This would have been my response.
You have to put an end to this type of disgusting talk. Especially when your not the only one hearing it. I wish you strength and peace!
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If he’s still talking to dude and hasn’t confronted him seriously about what he said, then I would assume he has no respect for you unfortunately. Hope you find peace
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Oh, dear god, it was a joke
If he was married I’d feel sorry for his wife, but I think you should get a grip; god forbid if you had something to really be offended by
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I would have said you wish and laughed it off, guys just don’t think and probably didn’t mean to make you feel like that.
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I would laugh it off and feel flattered. Lol. My husband told all the guys at work how I gave him 30 min bj. It’s not a big deal. Now if they grabbed me or cornered me that would be a totally different story. My husband wouldn’t allow that either. But he’s proud of being my husband and knows I don’t cheat so…
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My husband jokes with his cousin about me and his cousins wife all the time. It’s not a big deal. It’s a joke.
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Sorry I must be old fashioned but I would not be with my.husband If he allowed anyone to disrespect me this way I have morals and values and if your husband don’t respect you why should his friends .
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I personally wouldn’t care at all, it was clearly a stupid joke, and I personally think it’s nice knowing that I’m attractive enough to joke about in that way. My husband likely wouldn’t care much either, he likely would have just said a witty/joking comment back at his friend and I wouldn’t expect anything more than that. Men love to mess with each other and talk shit.
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It was a joke, not a dick. Don’t take it so hard.
Lighten up. Get over it.
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