My husband wouldnt want me to fix his plate cause Id probably do it wrong LOL…but he does for me all the time. Who cares what they think if yall have your own groove. (sidebar) I wouldnt be going there for dinner anymore though🤣
Tell his momma to make his plate.
A) he’s grown
2) he has hands and legs.
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Men should be able to make their own plates. They ain’t children.
It’s an old fashion thing. I work 40 hour work weeks come home clean anything that needs it cook dinner and serve everyone. Kids first than my husband. I than clean the kitchen and get the kids ready for bed around 8… and my husband helps out with cleaning and the kids. It doesn’t matter who does what as long as it gets done. There’s days I come home exhausted but I still cook dinner and serve the kids than my husband. I’ve been a stay at home mother and a working mother. Both are hard. I will always serve my kids and my husband!!!
mine is fine making his own if we do leftover night ill fix all of ours n have it ready at the table. So it just depends. I cook i fix my daughters plate and mine and i clean up and take care of all the stuff that needs to be taken care of around the house. Hes been on alot of 7/12s since January. We both grind hard for a good life in different ways. Taking caring each other.
Tell her and your husband to both screw off, Taking care of twin toddlers,Omg, he should be helping out. I 'd ask grandma to look after her kid while you look after yours.
If it was me, if he didn’t make his own plate…his ass would be really hungry or starve to death. I’m not your mother.
I only fix it if I want to. We both try to help each other out. It’s just what you are comfortable with. Don’t let it get you down. Ignore her
I always made sure my kids were fed an adult can make their own plate
If it works for you and your Husband then what she thinks really doesn’t matter.
Also she seems toxic, she wouldn’t see me again. That’s just me though.
Have her make his plate since she’s still feeding him from her tit & so concerned about it
I agree you have your hands full and yes he’s a grown up
If the mother is so worried about his getting food maybe she should do it.
He’s entertained the conversation and allowed it to get back to you. Idk. He may be thinking about divorce for other reasons and the mother is just saying this…
You said in ur post you recently found out ur husband’s family is discussing you without ur knowledge. Number 1 I hope if your husband is in this he is defending you which includes your MIL quotes about you not fixing his plate. It sounds to me like your doing the right thing in making ur twins come first . He is a grown man and if your not able to eat due to the twins he should be respectful enough to take care of your children while you can eat . And as for (KAREN)UR MIL if she is so upset thinking he can’t fix his plate she can do it and mind her own business your doing the right thing putting the Twins first and if he is gossiping in their clan and not standing up for you if it were me he would not only fill his plate he would prepare it as well . 
Faaaaaaah! Some people. Well I’d like to hope your husband has your back! You don’t need to explain shit to no one as long as you and your family are happy and know what’s what. Never mind them haters! The audacity of her and them 
I make all the plates at once I have four kids so I make sure I serve the kids first and then the hubby. But if they are talking behind your back don’t go to those get togethers… give them more to talk about 
unless they pitch in on the hard work you do they have no RIGHTS to say not a damn thing on how and what to do! Period
I’m usually too busy making our kids plates, or he is making one and I’m making the other, and then we both make our own. I have been told I don’t give him enough so I hand him is own plate and let him have at it lol
If I’m at the stove or counter and getting our daughters plate ready, I’ll ask my husband if he wants me to get some for him. More often than not, he prefers to do it himself because he will season it how he wants and take the portion he wants etc. It’s not about serving him. It’s just about “Hey I’m literally right here with a spoon, want some?” for convenience. We are both adults and it just doesn’t make sense to decide how much of anything someone else gets except for a child. Now, if it’s like a piece of chicken so the portion is the same, no big deal he can toss my piece on a plate or whatever but I’ll still grab my own sides so I get the amount I want and so does he. It’s a sweet gesture to serve your significant other but honestly it seems like it would create more waste or work on the back end to serve a portion for someone else if they want more or less. I think your mother in law is WAY out of line for even commenting on it but especially for saying you’re not a good wife. I would completely cut ties with her and if your husband agrees with her then he can move back home with mommy dearest.
Obviously she failed her job as a mother if her son can’t even make his own damn plate.
Hell. No.
When we go to my in laws she makes everyone’s plates. All 5 of us in my family and it drives me nuts but it’s what she likes to do so I allow it. But she asks me a million questions like when making burritos “do you want cheese? Beans? Meat?” Etc… to make it’s easier to just let me do it.
She knows not to say anything to me. Lol. I don’t like in the 50s.
You have a husband, that can make his own fucking plate. Not another child.
“I would make his plate, BUT whenever I ask him what he would like to eat…it’s never something you can place on a plate. 
”
It’s 50/50 in a relationship. If it isn’t, walk out the door. Obviously a mammys boy
thinking her MIL should make her “baby.boy” his plate!
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I make my hubs plate every night. He works 3rd shift and I put it in the microwave for him to reheat when he gets home. But when he worked regular hours. I didn’t make his plate. I have 2 kids, I feed my kids b4 anybody. Grown adults can get their own plates.
Cut them off, best decision me and my hub made was to cut off my in laws.
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In my house it depended on who cooked. If I did, I fixed his plate. If he did , he fixed mine.
Burn that bridge baby! also let your hubby know how you feel then dont bring it up again lol
I always make my mans plate but that’s just me 
it’s not a requirement tho and if it was something HE felt that strongly about then it would’ve came up before the point of marriage. Yeah I get it’s frustrating but trying to cut his family off because of a difference in views is a little extreme to me. As long as you all are happy what it does it matter how they feel?
Work your marriage out with your husband. If you heard this respectfully speak to your husband of your concerns and ask him what his thoughts are. And work it out together. You’re married to him and he’s married to you. That’s the most important people right there. And no one else. And really they should butt out. And your husband should talk to you direct if he has concerns with his marriage and not his family.
Good luck
It’s your choice and if your husband is good with that and understands the situation and is supportive then who cares what the others say. Unless your husband did not take your defense, in that case, that’s another story…
If that would happen to me at our next gathering while I was up making my kids plates I would say out loud something like and no im not making your plate unless you want to wait until after our kids are fed just so the mil knows that you know what’s being said behind your back. I offer alot of times to make my boyfriends plates but he does the same for me its not expected by either of us
I heartily encourage you to stir the pot and say to your mils face to “stfu and stop butting into my marriage”
Snip snip! You can’t cut that toxic out fast enough!
Not what they think. what about your husband? how does he feel about it? That’s it!!!
I’m an old soul I do make my husbands plate because he is the reason we have food on the table but I do not think it’s a must by any means, your mother in law needs to mind her business!!
What did he have to say about it? Who told you about it and if it was him did he say anything to her in your defense?
He should make your plate with all you do
Is it 1950?? The days of Ward and June Cleaver are long gone.
In my toni Braxton voice …since she knows it all then that’s where you need to be
Why can’t you both get the kiddos plates and then you each get your own?
You’re his wife not mother. Curious what he says to them in return?
I would wipe my ass on her carpet. Your husband is more than capable of making his own plate
He is a grown ass man and xan make his own plate. Him and his mom gotta go
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How olds the hubs?, 3🥴
Do his legs and arms work? Fuck that
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Why isn’t he making your plate?
It’d not the 1950s… men are to make there own plates
Wow. Is it a cultural thing?
I always fixed my husbands plate and I had 4 kids
I would cut them off 
if she is so concerned, she can make his damn plate. My boyfriend cooks every night and makes my plate every night. He cleans, wash the dishes, packs my lunch for work etc. I wish his mom would say that nonsense to me:expressionless:
I would cut them all off super toxic. What does your husband say to them?
Oh that would be easy. Slap a piece of toast on his plate. Done. Then you’ll have time to enjoy your warm meal.
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It’s HIS mom and HE needs to tell her to mind her own marriage! I can’t stand this patriarchy bullshit.
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Maybe mom should fix it for him 
Tell her to do her job as his Mommy and fix him a plate.
Let him go hungry. Sounds like a case of pure laziness to me. Let him go back to his mama so she can wait on him.
Ur in laws sound like they are stuck in the 50s. Having two kids plus urself to take care of is not easy. As long as ur husband is cool I wouldn’t worry what his family thinks. U guys are not a project.
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Just make his when u make the kids. It’ll take what 1 minute extra?
I’m not sure what’s worse, the fact that MIL feels not mommying her baby is grounds for divorce, or the fact that your husband as allowed her to think that saying these types of things is in any way acceptable.
I have zero tolerance for this type of nonsense. I would stop the get togethers because you are too busy being a mom to your babies to also be a mom to your grown husband.
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When I read posts about rude MIL i read as if it’s about mine because man that woman…
If his mother is so fuckin concerned… then she should continue to make plates for her son!!! 
Tell mommy to do it she spoiled him to start with. And he is a grown ass man and piss off
Tell her its 2021 men take care of themselves now
If your husband isn’t standing up for you when his family talks about you, then yes you should probably get a divorce. But not because you don’t make him a plate, but because he’s spineless and unsupportive.
I’m curious what your husband thinks… I sure as hell don’t do it for my husband.
The kids need to come first he’s a big boy he can do his self
You should divorce her!
I usually make everyone’s plates. If we’re at a function at my mother’s, I make his plate. But normally at his family functions he makes his own. But nothing is written in stone. We go with the flow. I think it should be whatever works best for you both in all different situations.
Sounds like “his plate” symbolizes something for them and they aren’t seeing that in you. Before you get angry try to understand their feelings and perspective and then communicate with your husband on the topic. Work through this and let it bring you closer in your relationship rather then fighting
I’d fix her a nice plate of mind your own business
I’d make his plate for him. I’d serve him in front of her with divorce paper
My husband makes me a plate lol
I’m so curious what kind of hell she lived through as a wife 
My husband mom said I need help mentally because i said he need to find a job now that our 4 kids are done with school for summer … and clean house why he is not working…
Throw the man away if he expects this
You need to nip that in the bud now… tell them straight 
%… At least you’ll all be reading of the same hymn page… And no your not a bad wife or mother… if anything its him with the problem… if he can’t stand by you… only you know the Answer to this… good luck…
x
Are they living in the stone ages?! Only time I make a plate of food up for a partner is when I dish it out to all the family but no way am I going out my way to make a grown ass man a plate of food 
. Talk about entitled much! I’d tell him and his horrid mother to jog on.
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Ummm he’s not a child!!
He’s got arms and legs…
a woman shouldn’t have to serve a man… especially if she’s doing the kids plates… him and his family need to grow the hell up…
Tell Mummy to take her little soldier back home to her if she thinks he’s not being looked after properly. And whilst you’re there tell him to man up and her to get her nose out of your business
You should tell your mil that you should divorce her son because he does not help you with getting the twins plates. He is not a child or helpless. If she someone should wait on her son, maybe she should get his plate. Lol
He can make your play plate.
There are times when I make my fiance’s plate, but many others he’s not ready to eat when the rest of the family is and he knows What portion he wants.
After reading the first sentence… all I need to say is he is a grown ass man with im assuming 2 working arms and legs. I mean sometimes I pull out plates for everyone and if im making a general dinner say eggs and bacon ill just put food on everyone’s plate but otherwise he can figure it out or starve…
Divorce him and take ALL the plates lol
Boy bye. Make your own plate
I don’t want nobody making my plate for me! Why would anyone want someone else to give them their plate? Like what if I want a mountain of potatoes??? 
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Wow! My husband normally makes my plate! Especially if I’m busy with kids! Or even if the table is busy and he’s already there!
2 arms 2 legs, no piano tied to ass, get it himself.
I make my kids plate then my boyfriends.
Sounds like a Mama’s Boy
Who care what they think. Just do you and if ya’all are happy that is all that matters.
Seriously tell her to pound sand!
Your husband’s mom needs to take her tit out of his mouth
Sometimes I make his plate and sometimes I don’t. He doesn’t expect it and when I do it he always thanks me. I’d tell the mother in law to butt out and f**k off
When our children were small (we have 8 ) he & I would make their plates, get one of us settled with the kids and whoever wasn’t sitting with the kids would make our plates. Usually if was him making the adult plates.
If what y’all do works for you, tell his family to fuck off.
I would cut them off too. This is not the 1800s. Relationships are equal now days and if he wanted a servant and not a wife then he should’ve married someone different. Does your husband see this as a problem? Because if he does I would be filing for divorce instead and finding myself a more understanding and caring husband.
Oh heck no! He is a grown man and this isn’t the 50s. He can make his own plate and he should be helping with those twins too instead of whining to his mom you don’t make him a plate. WOW. She sounds way too overbearing.
I had a very similar experience and that’s why my husband of 16 years is my ex-husband, it’s not your job to worry about this and I know that’s really frustrating to hear, that is his job to put his foot down, lay some boundaries and protect his wife and children and if he’s not doing that you need to be the one to divorce him because he will never do it then, he will never stand up for you, he will never protect you, you will never, ever come first and if that’s what you want and stay with him, it’s absolutely your choice what you’re willing to put up with🤷🏻♀️