Considering I’ve paid over $300 a week for daycare… I wouldn’t complain about anything if I was paying $20-$40 a week. Consider that a blessing.
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Im with the mom. Sorry. You’re paying her pennies & her time is worth a lot more. Her visiting her married bf is irrelevant to the issue & we can see you want to make her look bad. Still doesn’t take away that you’re not paying her enough. So you should plan around her schedule because she’s doing you the favor. Go ahead and try to find a day care. Then you will see the value of your mother’s time.
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The way I see it If a grandparent is watching their grandchildren they shouldn’t be paid they should want to do it out of the goodness of their heart but that’s only if it’s once in a while but now that she’s doing it as a job 5 days a week then she should be paid. Like anybody with a job they work their appointments around their schedule. My mother came down one summer and told me to take my kids at A-day care because she will watch the children to get to know them better because she’s from out of town. And she didn’t want to spend her money to go to the store blah blah blah and I said why not she said it’s my money but then again she’s living in my house for free eating my food using my electricity using my water. I was more than happy to send them to day care . But it was her idea to pull them.
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I pay my mother $300 a month. & if I have to go to work on call I pay her a lil more. I appreciate her so much because daycare is so expensive & I’m a single mother. Maybe you can apply for some assistance or come up with a better deal with your mother. Good luck to you! 
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I’d look into daycare because it sounds like there’s already drama between you and your mom lol. She doesn’t have to babysit your child for next to nothing. There are childcare subsidies to help those that qualify for the daycare tuition assistance. Contact your local DCF/CPS office and they can guide you in the right direction. Not all daycares are bad. If you don’t care for the big daycares, you can also ask DCF/CPS about licensed in home daycares too. You’d still get a subsidy if you are approved for it. In home daycares are a lot smaller because of the adult to child ratios per age (example: if they have 1 infant, they are allowed 4 kids total; if they’re toddlers and no infant, they can have 6. Your other option is to look for someone to come into your home and you pay them full price for whatever rate they’re asking for.
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I think I get what OP is saying.
The grandma will pitch a fit if mom puts the kid in a real daycare - which mom may not be able to afford.
However grandma seems to do whatever she wants but manipulates the situation to make the mom feel guilty.
To the OP - find a way to pay for daycare. If you are low income there are tons of programs to help with the costs.
Get out from under grandmas control NOW. This will only get worse.
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Well first of all, it’s not your mom’s obligation to babysit your daughter. Second of all, $20-$40 a week is nothing! Believe me, it would be FAR more expensive for you to have to pay for an actual sitter or daycare than it is for you to buy her the occasional thing she asks for. Also, if your grandma is elderly and she also takes care of her or has to take her to her appointments, it’s not something you should be getting mad over. Your mom has a life too and for the little appreciation you have for her help, you should be taking her time and schedule into consideration as well.
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Send your kid to daycare and pay your entire wage to them 
you sound extremely self entitled 
you’re lucky you have someone to help you out.
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$20 - 40 a WEEK for watching your child DAILY???
And I was feeling bad I could only give my mom $200 a week!
First she’s your mom not your baby’s mom. That means she’s a grown woman who can spend her time as she pleases, but she’s helping you out and giving of her energy and time to watch your child. You need to be respectful of her time. If you had hired another sitter you’d have to work around them as well, it shouldn’t be be different because it’s your mom.
$20-40 a week is extremely cheap compared to what a daycare would charge.
You really need to reevaluate your priorities. You can’t want good care and rely on your mom to provide it and then not fairly compensate her for it. You’re taking advantage of her and that’s just not cool.
Then again ,the way you are spilling her irrelevant personal details ( what does her having a married boyfriend have to do with still watching your kid?)maybe you don’t really care for your mom. And in that case you’d deserve it if your mom suddenly decided to stop being your basically free babysitter.
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Don’t have her watch your daughter
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Sadly if your not going to a regular day care you do have to work around other peoples schedule, my mother in law watches my son if she ever tells me she can’t watch him I have to give up my shift or ask to go in late or leave early or what ever her schedule needs. work hourly so my job is a little more flexible. If there anyone else who can watch him say like my oldest kids, per say this works with their schooling but say I have to drop my son off at 10:30 and my mother in law is at an appointment at 10 won’t be home till 11 my oldest kids will watch my son for the 30 minutes. As far as payment though if that’s what y’all agreed on that’s what you have to pay her. I mean I love my mother in law I do pretty much anything she asks me but I never feel like I have to
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Just depends on your finances, and what you can afford to pay ur mother but she shouldn’t expect to get paid for watching her grandchild, my father driver an hour and half to see his grandchild and never ask for money, but daycare in washington is anywhere from 900-1500, I hope ur able to find good outcome that’s works best for you and ur family…best of luck.
You can’t be mad or get mad because yes it might be hard to pay child care but you’ll feel way better than having to depend on someone who isn’t dependent also that’s so little money you pay your mom , if someone offered me that much I won’t do it family or not! Your mom is probably not caring because you really don’t pay her anything. And she feels like she deserves more so that’s why she expects things in return . So I say pay her what’s fare and let her know you won’t be giving her or buying her extra stuff because you can’t afford it . Or find a daycare not all daycares are bad plus you’ll feel better knowing you won’t have any drama or problems!!
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I think you have two options. 1) sit down with your mom and come up with a concrete schedule that works for both of you that does not change AND a decent amount of pay.
2) you apply for daycare assistance and find a certified daycare.
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Gosh I must be a weird Nana because I didn’t mind helping my daughter with my granddaughter
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Entitled much? It’s one thing if your mom offers to babysit for nothing or next to nothing, it’s another for you to demand and expect.
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I would just say it’s an educational center for her to get ready used to socialization and structure so when she is ready to be in preschool she’ll be well prepared or something along those lines. Blessed be the peacemakers. Just look around at some and go in, check them out, ask questions, check for cameras and if you can view for the first couple sessions etc.
That being said, if you aren’t comfortable with daycare, and you aren’t comfortable paying them that much, they’re caring for your child and getting paid good to do so, then what’s the difference? Thats it’s your mother?
You have to really evaluate your position on this, I think. Do you choose someone you trust and pay them more, or do you put your trust in daycare and pay them way more.
Personal opinion: Your mom is your mom and she is helping you out in a huge way for really really cheap. It is her grandchild, but she is also a human being and has a life outside of that as well. I would find a standby sitter who I trusted for the times that she was out of town, I’d pay her 15-20$ a day minimum to watch my child, and I’d spoil her and give her vacations. I love my mom and shes raising 3 of my brothers kids, so my kids dont get her much. I’ve lost too many people and I’m scared of the day I lose her and cherish every moment we get. Dont take her for granted please. It’s a blessing your baby gets to have her grandma.
To each their own, and I hope it works out for everyone!
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Wait what?! Your child’s grandmother wants to be paid to spend time with her grandchild? My parents look forward to watching my daughter 2 days a week when I’m at work. I totally get every situation is different, and I would respect working around her schedule though. I plan my work days around if they have appointments or anything like that. Daycare might be a good option for you guys!
I would pay her. She is providing you a service you can’t otherwise afford and you apparently trust her. She could get a job elsewhere and then you’d be screwed.
Or you or your partner cut back hours at work so one of you can remain home.
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I’d just sit down with her and talk about it. See what her expectations are. Tell her how much you appreciate her helping out and tell her why you’d prefer she watch the grandkids. Let her know you’d like to give her a little something, but you can’t afford much. Get her groceries or pay for her to go on a short vacation/staycation. My mom worked for family services so she would not have us using a daycare so she watched our kids. You can find someone to come to your house on the days your mom wants a break. Put up nanny cams to be safe.
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We pay my mother in law $400 a month to watch our son for 3 hours 4 days a week.
Daycare isn’t cheap. I’d pick your battles
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If you were to pay her more then she should schedule her appt during times she doesn’t watch your child. Its a paying job. Its not a grandma visit.
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Ware I live daycare is 300+ a week. I’d gladly pay 100 for grandma to watch her
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Get an actual babysitter to avoid the drama!
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If you are considered an essential worker look in to the essential worker childcare assistance in your state, there are no income limits and it’ll cover most of the cost and you’d pay $40-$60 a week depending on the tuition
$20-40 per session sounds a bit more fair to your mothers time. Gone through this same thing with my mother, she’s is absolutely not obligated to be your babysitter it should be considered a blessing she is even willing or able to watch your kid. Honestly it would be easier to just come up with a set price whether it be per session, per week, per payday…something a bit more concrete. And maybe set up a back up for days she can’t do it, just because she’s mom and grandma doesn’t mean she owes her time, but if she gives the time then maybe help her feel worthwhile for the time she invests.
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My mom watches my daughter 40 hours a week and we pay her the same we would be paying the daycare down the road from us. I’d much rather pay my mom than a stranger.
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Hire an actual babysitter. Sounds like a lot of drama. But if your finances can’t handle that, then maybe agree to $100 a week plus flexibility for weekend road trips. What she does with her time off is her business, not yours.
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I never called spending time with my grandbabies baby setting them. If your mother is helping u for less than a daycare u need to work around her schedule.
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Mom is not your employee/contractor whom you can hold accountable for not working with your schedule. You and your boyfriend need to find a more reliable means of daycare. Further, whether your mom’s boyfriend is married is not a factor for this equation. While I understand the significant cost of daycare (it’s $200/wk in Georgia), if you want to work, you and your boyfriend will need to allocate the funds to cover said cost. Mom can babysit or visit with grandchild when she has time. She probably wouldn’t even charge for that time. 
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Honor your mother and respect her but it seems like it is impacting the relationship. Get someone else you trust and put cameras in.
$20-40 a week is a ridiculously small amount for caring for your child mom or not. You are taking advantage of your mom big time. She’s obviously doing you a huge favor by babysitting your child and working around her schedule isn’t unreasonable. She’s saving you tons of money. If you can’t do that and can’t afford daycare then that’s your problem not hers. I had my first son at 17 and nobody EVER babysat him or my second son. I worked night shift and their dad day shift. Even at that young age I didn’t depend on others to watch my children so get your shit together and deal with your own problems and stop acting like it’s your mom’s fault and responsibility you can’t afford daycare. It’s your child not hers. She already raised you and doesn’t have any responsibility for your children except being a good grandma not their babysitter. Grow up
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I don’t think I would want to do it everyday for free or not maybe a couple days a week she already raised her kids .I don’t blame your mom
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Grandparents are under no obligation to be anyone’s full time free or almost free babysitter. Considering she is doing you a HUGE favor, I’d be more grateful. And honestly I would feel really guilty for not paying her what she is worth. Is her time not just as valuable as yours? Would you keep going back to your full time job if they paid you $20 a week?
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Either keep doing wat makes u unhappy or…prepare to fall out with her. Find somebody in ur price range.
Could u put your child in care for 3 days and your mum the other 2 days. Then everyone can work around appointments with set days
If i hired her and paid her like she worked for me, then i would be upset about her expecting so much. But you BOTH work full time jobs and EXPECT HER to work around YOUR schedules for 40 a week? No. Shes basically doing it for free. If she wants to work for you pay her better and then complain about her schedule. If she’s basically just charging gas money you have no right to be mad lol
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Lemme break it down honestly for ya… your mom’s doing YOU the favor here doll. 
I pay my mother $20/day that she watches my child. My youngest is in daycare…and is only affordable with state aid (they paid over 16k in 2020 for me).
Like… she could get a job, then what? And if she won’t… clearly, she don’t need one. I think you should really reassess this situation here. Cause, mom’s really doing you a solid…
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So your looking into daycare which you’d pay hella more for? Youre expecting her to work for free?? The fact she doesn’t work and looks after your kid while she doesn’t work – I wouldn’t be slating her… defo not. She’s asking for money bc she spends her week looking after your child as much as a parent would… she gets gas money for someone else so not even her! Seeing her point yet?
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Suck it up, and make her suck it up too. Set boundaries with her and if she doesn’t like it then tough shit. She’ll learn real quick she has it good once you stop giving in to her every demand. If not, save up and buy baby monitors that connect to your phone and hire a babysitter. Cousin, niece, close friend, or local.
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Lemme also be the only one to point out… you’re pretty shitty for airing her dirty laundry too “her married boyfriend”… girl…i hope for all the mamas whos shoe this fits …drops that kid, cause that’s rude as hell. 
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Then nothing anyone says you’ll listen to.
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You acknowledged the value of your mom’s help when you admitted that strangers are not an option you’re comfortable with. 20-40 a week is truly unfair to her, because minimum wage per hour would give her more than that for an 8 hour work day, even after taxes.
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Your moms time is as valuable as anyone’s. If she’s watching your child, work out a number in between one of the pricier places and the bare minimum of which you’ve been paying her. 40$ a week is bananas. She is worth her weight man.
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Your paying her $20- $40 a week, are you kidding me.!!! She’s not the problem you are.!
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I agree that some of this is crazy (like the “Going to see her married boyfriend” part, etc.), and yes, many of us here would probably happily watch our grandchild without expecting money. But I don’t think it should be expected all the time…that we can just use our parents as free daily daycare. Yeah, I know she’s paying her a little. But still…
When your last child moves out to live on their own, your days of having to raise kids are over. You’re supposed to be able to enjoy life and go do those things you’ve always wanted to do. It really shouldn’t be EXPECTED to watch your grandkids for 8 hours a day everyday, unless they’ve offered to do so.
Also a licensed daycare provider would make you pay a couple hundred PER WEEK. But if you qualify for assistance (daycare vouchers), you may only have to pay, say, $30 week out of your pocket.
Besides, do you really wanna leave your daughter in the care of someone who’s upset with you for making her cancel her appointments/plans? Lol. She’s gonna come home to you asking “Why was Grandma in a bad mood?” Lol.
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Current daycare is running about $150.00 a week.
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You’re talking down on her because she doesnt have a job and uses your grandma’s car…so because she doesn’t have a job, she should work for you for free? You’re taking advantage of her. $20-$40 a week, daycare is three times that and you don’t have the peace of mind that your child is safe. Maybe she’d be more accommodating if you were more respectful and appreciative.
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You’re taking advantage of your mom. She doesnt owe you childcare, those are her grandchildren and if shes keeping them for you to work for damn near free you should be grateful and work around her schedule. Daycares close for weather and holidays and such too, stop whining and grow up. You arent entitled to anything
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If she expects to be paid, and it sounds like she does, maybe discuss with her what would be fair and make some type of arrangement amongst yourselves? Maybe she’ll be willing to do it within your budget? That way you’d get childcare and she’d have some money coming in to buy whatever it is she’s expecting you to get for her.
I hope it all works out for you-good luck! 
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No offense but you sound really selfish right now it doesn’t matter what her lifestyle is or who she’s dating she’s not coming to visit your child she is providing you a service in which you are saving an extreme amount of money on and I wish I had someone to help me like that dude I would be giving her extra money all the time because that’s ridiculous you’re not even paying her she’s doing it out of the kindness of her own damn heart and you’re sitting here acting like a spoiled brat but you have to sit here and help her out she raised you it’s not her time to raise another baby it’s your time you made that baby whether she works or not there’s none of your damn business her life is none of your damn business she’s not your type that baby is you’re responsible for her child care and you are damn lucky that your mom is being us Grace just as she is watching her for that cheap my mom I have to pay her twenty bucks just to watch my kid for 2 hours and she barely sees them honestly I’m not trying to sound like an ass whole but you sound really rude and like you’re taking her for granted and I can see why she is giving you an attitude
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Girl I DONT CARE IF SHES YOUR MOM OR NOT YOU NEED TO RESPECT HER and HER TIME!!! An actual daycare is going to cost you a hell of a lot more!! Stop being a brat!!
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Your mother already raised you… now she has to look over your kids too? She is doing you a favor and offering her time while getting a payment of less than 40… You need to work around her schedule or get an actual baby sitter.
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Stop using your mom. Second, if you don’t trust daycares, quit your job and raise your own child. Let your boyfriend figure out how to get those bills paid since y’all have that extra money saved up from your mom watching your kid for free.
Grow up. That’s your kid. Figure it out.
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This is more than babysitting, it’s full time child care. Count your lucky stars that you have a mom willing and able to do that for you. You’re considering paying strangers and yet are balking at the idea of a small compensation to family for full time childcare? Yes, accommodate your moms schedule! She’s not your servant and owes you nothing. You sound like a total brat.
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If you don’t like having to deal with her schedule, then you need to find a childcare provider that you actually pay a proper wage whose sole responsibility is to provide care for your child during certain hours. If that doesn’t work for you, then you need to deal with what you’re getting for childcare from your mother. Beggars can’t be choosers and she’s doing you a huge favor even though some aspects aren’t ideal. If you don’t want to deal with her, you need to pay a premium to send your kid somewhere else. Maybe a center with cameras so you can see what’s going on during the day.
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Well… Then just get another sitter and pay them more than $40 a WEEK?!
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Your mother isn’t responsible for watching and caring for YOUR child. You are.
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I would be worried about ur mother watching her tbh if she takes out of state trips. And find the perfect daycare i was the same way till I found my daycare for my kids I get hourly updates on them though an app. And it dont cost that much a week for me and they watch 2 kids of mine.
If you don’t actually pay her, then you cant say shit about her taking days off for appointment or to go see her boyfriend. (Also shame on you for airing her dirty laundry). She has a life too.
Oh and childcare is $250/week.
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I’m a single mom and I pay 250 a month to my sister just to be sure my daughter is safe and I also supply the food and snacks!! Pay her more or u and ur husband take turns on paying her
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First of all $20-40 a week is nothing and she doesn’t have to be your baby sitter just because she is their grandma. I’m a sahm and been home with the kids is not an easy job. If she sucks so much for letting you pay her nothing then go find someone else because I can assure you it will cost alot more than that. Just because she doesn’t work does not mean she doesn’t have a life of her own. Also taking care of your kids is her job so yes she does have a job.
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Girl bye! #ungrateful #entitled
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Maybe offer her $200. Week and say this is when we need you, period? There are so many great daycares but no one’s like a loving grandma! Is the drama because you are in her business as to what she does during her non babysitting time? Kinda makes you sound bitter. Who cares how she spends money, who she travels to see, who she lives with? Does she take good care of little one, do you trust her? If the answer is yes, she deserves more than gas money!
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Wow…try not having a babysitter ever I have had both my kids since birth and my oldest is 8 now and i.also home school be glad you even have a mom… And have you seen how much babysitters are…?your a luck duck acting unlucky
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Wow. What a messed up situation all around! But I would say Daycare bc your daughter will learn a lot of things and will make friends.
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Wow first off I wanna say I’m sorry for all the rude comments on here!! There is a way to voice opinions without being rude, but some people don’t kno how to do that!
Second, maybe talking with her to discuss a payment that works better for u and her both would be good, and letting her kmo what u can afford! Something that is more than u pay now, but obviously less than a daycare!!
Hopefully you can work something out!!
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Sorry girl. It best to watch your own kids. Im a SAHM. Hope things work out for you. Good luck to you and your husband.
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Look into child action to help you pay for childcare
Ummmm… She’s done her “time” as a mother. She should be enjoying being a grandmother, not a convenient babysitter… There is a BIG difference. And, sorry, so you should be paying her petrol. Sounds like a lot of underlying issues going on here. You may need to work out why you seem so resentful, or, alternatively, find a no related person to babysit so it can be a more professional arrangement.
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You put the fact that she’s seeing a married man out there to discredit her as a deserving human being. The fact that you used that to justify $20-40/ week is you answering yourself. You’re wrong. You know you’re wrong and you’re taking advantage. What she does with her free time has nothing to do with you. Especially if she’s taken good care of your daughter for so little. Not to mention paying her more would ease the burden on your grandmother too. Unreal.
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I understand daycares can b scary but u kno should have thought about all thus BEFORE having a child. Ur lucky u have ur mother. I will not babysit mine at all for any amount of money ever.
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You gotta find new childcare mama. Your mom sounds toxic af and you do NOT need that shit in your life.
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Pay her for the babysitting, everything else is on her.
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Ok so you need to look into day school not day care day school you maybe be able to get pre k counts we put our son in day school at 6 months old till kindergarten garden and was worth every penny and worry about what’s best for the child’s future don’t worry about your mothers drama
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Look imma be nice cuz a lot of this ppl aren’t, child care runs about 150 to 200 per week, they have designated hrs so if your late you pay by the minute, your kid does get to learn more and have a social interaction but depends on the kid’s age your mom might be the best choice, besides you have them build a bond, what she does w her time or love life is really none of your business don’t be selfish your kid is looking at all that behavior, talk about paying her a bit more, be thankful she drives to your home! You would have to drive the baby to daycare and run to work and get off and run to get her, while your mom accommodates, if she’s offering you her help be nice and grateful she might not expect you to buy her stuff but legit thank her and help her too she’s doing it for you too and consider her!! I’m a single mom, my family 1500 miles away, and when I had my mother in law I acted the same way now is just me no breaks!! Even if I’m sick or tired!
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$20 to $40 a week? 
that’s only $4 to $8 a day! (Mom-Fri) you are insane. Imagine going to work for the whole day and only making $4.
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I have four children and would never charge them to watch my grandkids… I really don’t see how a mother can do that! Help your child out… that’s what family is for. I watched my cousins two kids for free all last summer… because we are family and that’s what we do for eachother
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Im so sorry for all these VERY rude comments. I hope everything works out for you. But to be completely honest in wluld look into daycares. I know there are scary stories ablut them. But it would help your daughter make friends and she could be learning stuff while there.
Just do daycare. Saves all the dramas. Trust me. Ive had similar issues. Dont give her any chances to cause drama. Your child will be fine.
Do day care. But its way nore thqn 20 40 a week. But relaiable between 6 am and 6 pm.
$20 what huh 
ur daughter is not hers to take care of at all my mom watches my kids if I have a doctors appointment that is it, ur mom doesn’t owe you anything or ur daughter she is a free woman if you want to keep her you should pay her for her time that’s a lot of hours that she could be doing her own thing but instead she is a babysitter… this is actually really really sad
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Figure out a PROPER salary that you can afford and work with and pay your SITTER. She just happens to be your mother
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Sorry bout your situation I know your stressed out. Maybe set some boundary rules with your mom. Like if she wants money from you for something than she has to babysit to make that money. Maybe pay her little more than enough to just cover her gas im sure she could use some extra money during this hard time to. Be thankful you have a mother to help you and you don’t have to pay crazy amounts for day care or other sitters. Show your mother you appreciate everything she is and has done to help you in your time of need. Sit and talk with her bout not being able to just give her money for her random needs without anything in return. Discuss a better payment plan with her, by letting her know what you can afford and both deciding what payment would be best for the both of you. Definitely think about paying her more than what covers or almost covers her gas, im sure she needs other things than just gas.
She does have a live of her own and im sure she has things she has to take care of also. Maybe yall can sit down and come up with a schedule that would work around both yalls duties and work out.
Either that or do daycare or new babysitter.
She’s grandparent spending time with her granddaughter should be all she wants for payment lol but thats just me.
Times are hard right now
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Do what’s best for you and your baby , period
For anyone reading this your parents are not babysitters they did not birth ur kids and don’t ever expect them to watch ur kids full time they don’t owe you anything 
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Be patient. You won’t need her services forever.
Sounds stressful. I think it would be worth it to just put the baby in daycare. Like someone said they would be more reliable and if your mom doesn’t have a job then babysitting her grandchild seems like a job to her so she’s prolly expecting compensation, although in my family the grandparents would help out but they did have plenty income coming in and I can imagine if they didn’t then maybe we would have gone through what you are going through, sadly
As a mother
I’ll need stability and someone reliable.
As a daughter;
I wouldn’t like it if someone was taking advantage of my mother, making her commute and work and not getting pay for it.
And as a Childcare Provider ( I own a daycare )
I wouldn’t have you as a client,
you’re not appreciating or showing gratitude towards what she is doing for you.
And I wouldn’t have your mom as an employee because she is not understanding that Childcare is a job, not matter how you feel, you get up and go and do it,
Your clients need you, no excuses!
Appointments are to be scheduled during your free time.
Or requesting the time off in advance, so the parents can make other arrangements.
Sorry if I come across a bit harsh, just being Honest!
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Take your daughter to daycare for a few weeks, you will have a whole new respect for what your mom does for you and you will be happy to give her some extra money.
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My son went to day care. It was a relief for me even though it was expensive we made it through. He is 21 now.
Daycare has always been a wonderful experience for my kids. You need to remember that media produces what sells and sad/scary/abusive stories sell. Many caregivers do so because they love children and love the work. Your mom sounds manipulative at best, narcissistic most likely and I wouldn’t continue this situation. Assistance for child care is often more accessible than people realize and I believe was even expanded under the lastest relief bill. Find a daycare, move on from the toxic situation.
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Things we need to think about before we start a family.
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So you want her to change her schedule and babysit for free? That seems fair:person_facepalming:
daycare or you and the FATHER change ur work schedule!
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20-40 a day is more reasonable. You’re paying for safety, reliability, etc. 100$ a week at least
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There is a state program which helps with childcare costs if you qualify. I had it because my mother wanted an astronomical amount of money to watch my daughter. At the time, daycare was $85 a week. I paid $25 with the state subsidy program
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Your mom sounds like she has her own issues to work through. That being said daycare is expensive. Around me it’s like 2k/month. I think if you and your husband can afford $100/week it’d be better than daycare for your wallet, and as compensation for your moms time. You should talk to her about maybe scheduling appointments on her days off, especially if she wants you to accommodate her needs.
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My mom helped watch our kids and I got her some groceries or some spending money. She didn’t ask for it or expect it but you can’t put a price on your child’s safety and well being. That’s being said, we did put our kids in daycare (I visited the daycare twice, talked to the teachers and thought long a d hard about it) I was nervous but took the leap and it was amazing for both our kids and my mom. Now she can be the Grandma and keep the kids on weekends instead of feeling obligated to be the full time caretaker.
Dude you should be paying her at least 20-40 a day or come to an agreement to 150 a week. Because you will be paying a butt load more for a stranger to watch her. Only because she is your mom doesn’t mean she has to babysit for free
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I pay my mom $300 a week to watch my kids while I work. She is a grandma but that’s also technically her job. I would (and you would be also) paying more for kid(s) to go to daycare and this way you know they’re safe and learning things. If you aren’t paying her like it’s her job I wouldn’t expect her to work around YOUR schedule. If you were paying her fairly I don’t think she would be asking for more money or going on trips.
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