I’m sure to set boundaries will help everyone set stone for her to visit and check in the set a time for her to leave. Maybe she comes after school but at dinner time, it’s your family time. Maybe you have a pitch in dinner once a week. She can have something to plan, prepare and look forward to.
She is lonely try to get her interested in groups etc for her age does she go to church could she help with cleaning or Sunday school . Your husband will be very upset if you say she carnt come
Love every minute, when they are gone life is a lot different!! for your whole family!!If you love him, love his mommy!! Let her have certain days or times. Dinner time, wash dishes together… Share your life with her!!What if you were walking in her shoes??
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My mother in law use to be at my house every day. She passed and I miss her so much. So cherish your time with her while you can.
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Maybe have her watch the kids a couple days a week at her own house ??? Then have that one day alotted "just family time " where it’s just you guys and got her
. That way she doesn’t feel left out maybe ? Sorry …
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The things some people complain about🤦♀️ I wish my mother and mother in law were still here I’d want them to live with me
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I think its great that you have good relationship with you mother in law. My parents in law barely wants to come over or try food that I cook (different cultures). Dont do or say anything that you might regret later
Tell her that ‘Thursday’ is set aside for you, your husband and the kids. Everyone needs a break. Explain what you’re trying to do.
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Start by talking to your husband as it is his mother and he should know how you feel so he can back you up and so he knows where you stand. Then you can tackle dealing with her. Then have a sit down chat of days that work for her to visit. That way you’re not saying no but you are putting up boundaries. Boundaries are healthy!
Make her call ahead. You could be in the middle of something. At least you like your MIL. You need just family time too and family, I mean immediate.
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Does she live by her self , maybe she’s lonely .does she help you with chores and kids ? I’m a mother in law and I don’t just drop in . But if I did it wouldn’t be every day so see your point.
I wish my mother in law was around our house more, I love having her here. But I know sometimes having people at your house can be a bit much, no matter how much you love them. If you say something, try to make sure you don’t hurt her feelings, because it seems like she’s only there because she loves being around you all.
Maybe gently say to her that if she’s going to visit daily, she does so for a meal or visit and then go home so you two can enjoy time alone also. Hopefully she will be receptive.
I had that when l was young. When shes going out the door. Invite her round for the saturday or convenient day for you. She could be really lonely. Another couple of ldeas let her babysit while you and your husband go out. Or send them round to her house if little ones. Make sure your husband visits her at least once a week.
Just be honest, let her know how much you appreciate her and love her but you and your family need time alone
Be blessed to have her . I wish my mom in law was like that . She only wants to be with her daughter and that family . After being really nice to her I’m so over her partiality - have given up and have no expectations from her . Thankfully my mum is there for us if we need her ( lives far away ). I’d love to have a mum in law like yours.
When my oldest daughter got married I told her on her wedding day to be happy but I also said you will have your own family just don’t forget about me. Yes, you have your family but your mother-in- law is still family
Sometimes it may seem like she is around all the time but you are her family too. Just remember that someday the tables will be turned and your children will have their own families too. Just hope that they want to include you
I have the same issue with my mil, it’s not every day but it’s every weekend. To make matters worse she is always trying to discipline my son even when my husband and I are in the middle of disciplining, or even talking with him. We have talked to her so many times and she still doesn’t get it… I have had to start distancing myself and my son until she does.
Set a time limit like from 3 to 4 she can come over during week and on weekends a time good for all of you. Maybe the kids can spend Sunday afternoon with her so you and hubby can have alone time or date time.
Why rock the boat? A good mil is hard to come across. If she supports u and your family that is a gift. There are many people who have no support, ans would be crying out for this. You could potentially lose something very very special here. Xx
Mother in law should know better and give you space… but since she doesn’t… I’d talk to hubby. No way in hell I’d want his mother there day in and day out. Shit you didn’t marry her.
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Suck it up. She is probably lonely. If you need space ask her to watch the kids go out with your hubby and bring her something nice back to say thanks.
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Tell her you appreciate her being around but that she needs to respect that you can manage things when she isn’t there too OR go invite yourself to her house.bring the kids 
Sounds like ur living in the tv show EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND is her husband around if not she’s lonely & u r her only escape from her loneliness I know it’s hard but someday she won’t b there & believe me u will miss it mayb just tell her u would like 2 have some family time with just ur kids & husband I hope things work out 4 u good luck💗
Everyday! I definitely would say something. You need alone time with your family. It’s wonderful she helps out and is there but, there has to be boundaries. There is boundary issues with my MIL. She is currently living next door with my FIL her ex husband. It’s messed up lol 
Anyways she has definitely caused fights with my husband and I because what I think is not okay, right, rude or disrespectful, he sees no problem. Him and his brother have some issues standing up to her and talking about things. I have had to just say no and put a stop to certain things. I definitely would talk with your husband about the issue. You have your own family and lives now. Every day is to much if you ask me.
I would sooooo take advantage of an extra pair of hands. Maybe she is bored or lonely. Extra hands could make a batch of cookies, or prep food for supper, or fold laundry, or watch the kids and give you some me time. Maybe if you give get enough to do, she will stay home to rest.
Loneliness is a hard thing . But stand your ground and set boundaries family or not! She’s a grown women who now has time to focus on herself. There’s nothing wrong with visiting but it sounds like she needs a hobby or companion.
My husband was raised by his grandma. She comes over all the time. I honestly love it!! She is such an amazing person and we’ll just sit at the table drinking coffee and laughing at random stories all day. I embrace it and now she’s become a huge part of my life too. I wouldn’t want it any other way.
I would love my mother inlaw to be with us…and would have no issues her just rocking up. She did have some awesome tips on raising her mokos…which i gladley followed sadly shes not here today
You can’t just suck it up. Too many woman lose themselves. Moms have a way of doing that! You matter too. I don’t see why adults can’t compromise. I would respectfully and lovingly ask for just one day and night off a week.
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I’d set boundaries with your husband and have him talk to her. If he doesn’t I’d talk to her and start with “I am not trying to sound rude, and I do appreciate you spending time with us…” if that doesn’t work I’d move away 
I bet you would get a bit annoyed but it’s only love and moments that should be cherished If you need some time out just tell her maybe ask her if she can mind the kids so you and your hubby can have a night out . 
Maybe invite some of your family over for dinner one night if possible . Lots a love .
My bestfriends boyfriends mom put her nighty on there bathroom shower door to make her believe he was cheating on her. She had her own bathroom down the hall before her sons room where his bathroom is. And once she told my bestfriend she knew she was sleeping with her son when they were living together. Not saying this is like that but mothers dont do this kind of shit. Period.
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Depends on the culture as well . So if you marry Into a certain culture understand and respect the culture and traditions before getting married. You can have a one on one talk with her in a respectful way Im sure she will understand and respect your wishes . Communication and love is the key 
I personally wouldn’t have an issue with this. My mother used to come over every day (she has since passed away) and hubby never had a problem with it. His parents live 12 hours away but I wish so badly they lived closer and my kids could see them regularly, even everyday. My kids cherish all their time with their grandparents and I am so grateful for that.
She lives close by? How about asking her to have the kids over her house some times instead. Limiting her visit to coffee in the morning with you or ? I guess gently tell her you’d like time set aside for just you and you husband and kids. I’m sure she’d understand?
Just talk to your husband and her that you love her but ya’ll as a family need that family time a few days a week
I would Talk to my husband and tell him i would like some alone time with him and your kid. I love having my mother around because I never know when it would be the last day I would be with her.
Talk to her I understand that she might be lonely and want to see the family but if she has friends maybe she could go out with her friends or visit friends or join a club that would help with the loneliness
My parents live less than half a mile from us. My father is 68, and owns his own business, so he works close to 100 hours a week, sometimes more, and never takes a day off. I spend time with my mom everyday and we get coffee, but it is while my husband and my dad are both at work, She does not just show up, and hang around. And even if we invite her for dinner, she often says no, because she knows how important our personal family time is. I’m sure your mother-in-law means well. But sometimes there is a need for boundaries. It’s not like you’re asking her to NEVER come over, but some personal space and alone time with your husband and children is a reasonable request. Maybe set a specific day each week where you make it a point to have her come for dinner, and enjoy time all together, but leave the rest of the week open for just yourselves!
I am a mother in law and I 1000% respect my son and his wife’s time. They need their time with the kids and just to hang out. Be honest talk with her about the everyday visits maybe have dinner nights together. I cherish the nights my DIL invites us over for dinner and vice versa. Be sure to explain you love the time with her but you NEED your own time as well. Open honest conversation !
once in awhile when she there just say i am going out for a few errands and go get coffee i would cherish the fact that she wants to be there making memories with the kids she will not always be there perhaps talk with you husband and maybe then the two of you speak with her and just say hey maybe one day during the week dont come over but stop stressing enjoy it
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That is going on with my friend and her mother in law some times follow them ( like invite her self like she is just automatically included ) to any type of place they ago if she wants to go. Unless her son tells her no. She has a husband she dont want to bring him along even though they are happy married lol Maybe she wants to be with he 3 grandchildren 24/7
Yes I know how u feel ,but if u say anything about it ,u will only have trouble with u husband, just ignore her ,but be nice to her she is u Mother in Law u are in my Prayers ,good luck !
My suggestion is to maybe ask your mother in law if the kiddos can go over to her house maybe every other day for the afternoon and/or weekends so you and your spouse and can have some time away from “the kids” and then make it a point to have “family nights” with everyone
Well I know but she’s lonesome. It could be you in her shoes. Needing family. I would not be ugly to her. One day you may could really use her help. Try to love her. I never bother my children. I don’t go see them unless I get an invitation. I might step in and see the grands but I call first. She loves you all so much it sounds like.
You are good daughter in law…I never went to my sons house unless I was invited. So out of 25 years I have been to their house maybe 6 times…now she has not allowed my son or grandkids to even talk to me in 7 years with the exception when his brother passed then he only spoke in passing…
Sit down with her one day . Start with how much you love her and appreciate her etc then as politely as you can say how you need time alone sometimes . Some people might say you’re lucky but that’s because they Think they would like that but the reality is she’s not making you happy . I would take the same approach with your husband . But stand your ground . Don’t bend . This is YOUR life .
Just be open and honest but be mindful of her feelings. She might be thinking she is doing the right thing and taking pressure off U with the house and kids .
I’d feel smothered by that. I need my me time. Strike up a conversation asking her why she doesn’t go out for friends now and then and do lunch.
One more thing your husband is first her son,be grateful she birthed him for you lol
Chill girl,life is already hard
Atleast you have an example for your kids how to treat you whence you will be old and alone
Your husband needs to handle his mother. No way no how am I have my mother or mother in law showing up every day.
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It’s nice she loves you your husband and your children and wants to be around you, seeing her all the time with drive me nuts. My mother used to ask me to come over without my children. Found that very offencive and I just wouldn’t go.
Maybe a few times she shows up just have the hubs and you run out for dinner or movie or something. Be like oh since your here can you watch the kids we have to run to(fillin the blank_). She might eventually get tired of being left watching the kids all the time and might n invite herself over as much. And if it doesn’t well at least you and your hubs got to spend some time alone. Honestly she probably wants to stay busy and feel like she’s needed.
Well I would of loved my mother in law at my house but kids made her very nervous so she didn’t see them much. And now she is gone.
Don’t say a word… that’s up to your husband to set that limit. If he won’t then do some shopping while she’s there and use her for a sitter. You’ll hAve plenty of time with your husband after she’s gone. You can’t break his first bond of love and do not try. But then my DIL and grandkids want me to move in and call everyday to see when I’m coming over. I don’t go over every day because I fear being a pest… but I doubt it would ever be said to me by her…ever.
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Speak to her and just say “as much as we all love you… (example) Friday were having family day so we’ve banned all visitors, including you sorry” so will talk to you the day after!!!
On the other hand my mam is the same… will txt. phone me 10 times a day atleast… but if I tell her she’s not welcome tonight she will respect it.
Also your partner needs to speak up!! My ex was a mummy’s boy…part of the reason we split.
But wouldn’t take her love for granted… shes not gonna be there forever xx
Best thing is be honest and decide how many days a week is it okay for her to come over. You can also give her one day a week where she can just hang with the kids for you and hubbies date night. Then another day a week where y’all can visit and play games or something. I’m sure you using want her to never come over again but maybe there is a good middle ground for both of you.
I would not say anything directly. This is his mother, his relationship primarily. If he also wanted time with you and not her he would say. He doesn’t. You can talk to him, but if my husband didn’t want my mom around all the time. My husband might just be the one I kicked out, so keep that in mind. I would ask my husband and her that since she is free to come over so much, could you pick one night a week, when she stays with the kids while you and your husband take a walk or do something together, and/or, you go shopping or get your hair done or whatever else you don’t have time to do. Make it work for you, but don’t pit yourself against your husband’s mother. You might lose and you might sort of deserve it.
My father in law used to come over everyday and just hangout. I used to get annoyed because I felt like I had to entertain him and I wasn’t getting things done I felt needed to be done. Then when he was sick he lived with us for a short time until he passed. My kids were 1 1/2 and 3 1/2 when he passed. They still talk about him and remember a lot! I am so grateful that they remember him as much as they do and it’s because he was there, he spent time with them. 5 years later and there are days where I wish he would walk through the door.
Set some boundaries if you feel it’s too much, just talk with her I’m sure she will understand. She might not have had help when she was a young mom and knows how hard some days can be. She probably wants to help and doesn’t realize that she might be there just a little too much.
Your ass to happy …consider yourself lucky…your only problem is her being over everyday…let her bond with the kids whilst you do something else…because I sure your husband at work or something…so she isn’t spending time when he is around …I am sure she goes home in the evening…or she isn’t there all day…wish I had a mother- in - law like that…Grandma would have been the person I trusted when I wanted a little time out …
Get her involved with other people her age then maybe she could have some hobbies- playing cards, going to the movies, grabbing a bite to eat- having her own life outside of the life that she has with you all- before you know it you will be asking her over for dinner
I think there might be a kind way of setting this boundary. like choosing specific days to carve out your private family time without grandma. Maybe ask her to take the kids to her house or start to create days that your family goes to her place or that you have alone time with hubby. You have to get your husband on board and this should be his discussion to have. Start making a calendar and establishing or sharing the calendar and schedule with her to help, “we love your visits, but if you can do it with this schedule in mind (between these hours/days) it will help us with these routines we have in place” then plan a dinner with her. Ask her to help you with the routines or with certain family tasks to show her she is valued.
You’re living Deborah’s life in “Everybody Loves Raymond”! I hope she’s not as intrusive as Marie. If she is, and your hubby is like Ray, you’ll have to either say something or figure out a way to out-manipulate them both.
I absolutely love it that my family is always over…we have so much fun together!
I live with my mother in law so i get it… The only way to keep the peace will be for you to compromise. Maybe you can ask her not to come by on specific days. But still have her there on other days… Be grateful to your mil. She wont always be here…
I’m all for having MiL visit whenever she wants. But there are boundaries, and if she doesn’t get the picture. It’s time to have that uncomfortable conversation to make you comfortable again.
Stay out just one time and when he ask where you were tell him getting some alone time.
Talk to him strongly and say what you mean. Don’t beat around the bush. If he doesn’t fix it with her then have a heart to heart with her. If she persists then put ya foot down…
I think you should say something, but to hurt her feelings if you can help it !! Call her off to herself and explain to her not to come over All the time ! That you would like to spend some days with just your kids and husband and with her being around all the time ! It’s possible to appreciate her presence but you want sometime alB ong with your husband and kids with some one being there all the time ,
Try talking to her first, you need privacy. Its always lovely having loved ones over. But Its your family… You can Change your locks…or have loud sex and she’ll never just stop by ever again. LOL
Ummm she needs to give u some space. Seriously bad for ur marriage and bond as a family. Just tell her u appreciate her very much but you also need private time with ur family. If that don’t work just start fucking him randomly when she’s over loudly so she’s uncomfortable. Make sure it’s where u know she is gonna walk in or be in the next room. Like when the kids r taking a nap. Grope him and do shit to make her uncomfortable.
I would not say anything to her. That would be mean. She loves all of you and is probably just lonely. Your kids will be older and you’re going to want to visit them alot too. Maybe you can find something to keep you entertained or your mind off of her so you’re not annoyed. Maybe ask while she’s there if you could take a walk. Take a bubble bath, or take a drive. Or just stay home and go in another room for a while.
Give her a schedule of custody. That on Tuesday and Thursday she’s allowed over for dinner. Every other weekend she’s allowed to come over. Schedule date nights on the weeks she comes over.
It’ll be very impossible to discuss things that are needed to be talked about as a couple, albeit a little late in the day leaves you not enough time because you’re probably tired and want to go to bed. Family outings with just your family may never get to happen. School fees, where to send your kids to school and how to plan for college might be a discussion that she might want to involve herself in.
Other families would choose to continue in this lifestyle, while most, like you are, will go crazy because of feeling invaded.
Talk to hubby, let him know how you feel and ask him to address the situation. He doesn’t have to say it directly, but give a lil hint that mom must find another life of her own. She might be lonely and filling it with the wrong things
Just have date nights, and have her watch the kids. Some times we have to go around situations, to avoid hurt feelings and causing trouble. There is better ways to handle situations, then hurting peoples feelings!
I would think that She may be dealing with her own problems and doesn’t want to be alone, or she may not have much time left. By all means just ask for sum space instead of acting nice and be annoyed later.
Let him know u are doing a family night with u and husband and the kids, also just say what if your mum came over the same would he b ok with that, but go carefully
Poor things more than likely lonely n feels more useful being with you n ur family. Dont hurt her feelings. What about using that to yr advantage n go out to dinner with your husband? This could be your quiet time with him to reboot. Walks. Jogs in the park with him. Movies. Whatever you wanna do. And leave her with the kids. By the time yall get back shes nice n tired n yall ready for a shower n bed. Its a win win for all!
She probably feels lonely and see herself as a part of your family
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Your just going to have to tell her straight out not to come over so much,you want time with your own family if she can’t understand that then that’s her problem
Start wearing skimpy clothes and touching your hubby inappropriately in front of her. If she says something, tell her its your house and youd wait til no one was around if that were ever the case
Go to her house before she gets to yours hang out at hers then you give her the company she seems to want then you can leave to go home and have your family time when you choose. Hopefully she doesn’t follow you but if she does then start looking for homes with an annex as she’s here to stay
Why don’t you just go out on day dates or whatever with the husband and leave grandma with the kids? I’d be using the shit out of that…
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Speak up now or forever hold your peace!! I had to suck it up before… wrong mistake of myself, and my fiance is a daddy’s boy… So, one day I snapped at my finace and kept giving my father in law attitude(rude of me!) I knew I should’ve spoke up when I should’ve a few days before the day I snapped. Didn’t see him till a few weeks ago before he went back to work up north of Ontario as a teacher. Fly in reservation… I apologized for my nasty attitude, told him the reasons and he completely understood. Told me I should’ve said something instead of being quiet about it. Now we won’t see him until Christmas time.
Be grateful she is still around for your husband and especially your children. Her grandchildren are making memories with there Nana cause 1 day that is all they will be.
There is nothing wrong with setting boundaries. You can set aside one or to nights that are family only and let her know.
I would ask her to help you cook dinner. Or ask her to take the kids for a few hours. Honestly, she loves you guys and just wants to be a part of your life.
Can you use the time that she is there as time for you? A long bath? A book? A nap? A trip to the store? Then she is there, but she means freedom for you and not frustration.
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I would be honest and just say that you love and appreciate her, but need some private time once in a while. Ask her to give you a call before heading over in case you are not feeling up to it.
You need to tell her how you feel. Then she will probably take it to your husband. That’s ok. Tell him the same thing. I did not marry your Mother I married you.
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It’s called setting boundaries. My mom doesnt come over unless she asks or is invited. That is unhealthy. She or your husband needs to cut the apron strings or you do it for her. When you marry, your husband is supposed to leave his mother and father and cleave to his wife.
Change the locks or tell her to leave. Been there done this fight, it wasn’t everyday but it was on my last nerve with it all and finally just stood my ground and well a year later we all are fine again.
When my significant other and I get into any dispute he leaves and goes back to his Moms ? Is this normal , I can’t do this anymore
I would start putting her to work… asking for help with doing chores, cooking, cleaning, etc. I’d say “since you’re here, please help us…”.
I would deal with it honestly my dad came over to my house everyday and now that hes gone (passed 6years) i miss it and would give anything to have him stop over daily again
I enjoy when my mother in law comes around , granted it isn’t anywhere near everyday but we do have a good relationship! If I was in that situation , I think I would just tell her to stay with the kids at least one night a week or something and go out and do something just me and hubby. And tell her to at least call before she comes.
Either she or your hubs needs to cut the cord and set some boundaries. Most of us call before we go to someone’s house because we don’t wanna just pop up cuz they might be busy or having family time. Trust she knows what she’s doing and doesn’t care. And she will continue to do. Cuz she knows when/if she’s confronted about it she’s gonna be soooooo hurt and say she didn’t realize she wasn’t welcome or that y’all WANTED alone time. These types of MIL’s are the worst
You can only take so much. Talk to her because I would feel the same way if this was me. It would drive me fucking nuts seeing her everyday. No privacy nothing. It’s your house not hers. And your husband needs to see the boundaries that are being broken. She should know better first of all. A mother doesnt just come to her sons house every damn day theres something wrong with this picture. Fix it and get your peace.
If you bother by her comes to your house everyday than talk to your husband first and see how he feels about it but braise yourself you are in for some heated conversation but if he doesn’t se it like the way you see it like it’s becoming a problem than you just have to try see if she could stay with the kids while you have a night out with your husband but can you see yourself having a husband always going to mommy house everyday or have a loving husband at home with someone to keep the kids company while you out and do your spending quality time alone be thankful for people that actually wants to be in your life cause your kids will become married one day and I will hate to feel like that you are not appreciate over at the house
Yep… Suck it up… Loving n caring relationship between the 2 of you… So keep it going… She must be Lonely and wants to be included. 