Me and my husband moved in with my mother over a year ago , her health is not to good but he is so unhappy , i am scared i am going to loose him
She should clear her own dishes and mess. You arenât her butler.
If you are hosting her, then she shouldnât have to do a thing. If sheâs been invited over why should she?
Let her spend her time playing with her granddaughter, from your tone about her, if she did try to help, that wouldnât suit you either.
Er when you have vistitors you are supposed to wait on themđreally donât understand this at all. If it was my mom Iâd be waiting on her in my house.
Grandma said youâre a guest once. The next time youâre family.
In african culture thats how it is even if she you visit her place she sits and direct 
Yes she is ur guest and yes u cater to ur guests be lucky she plays w ur child otherwise ur child would be in kitchen too
Sheâs playing with your daughter
Your daughter will remember her for that
WAIT WHAT girl that is your guest they not supposed to be helping what the hell kind of manners did your momma teach u
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Be grateful she is there. There are never enough people to love a child. Suck it up Suzy
âŚshe owes you nothing. You cooked you cleaned upâŚbig real
If she only comes once in a while whatâs the problem, do you really expect her to VISIT & work in your home.
How else do you treat guests?..
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How often does she come? Maybe she think she did her duty when she was a mom and now she just wants to be a grandma and play with the babies
I was taught to be a guest especially in another womans kitchen ues your told feel free to help yourself.
In this case I would suck it up even though she sounds like a pain in the butt. Try to have them over as infrequently as possible.
Guests donât work at my house mother in law or not
Simple answer: She is not supposed to help and IS supposed to sit back and relax
Simpler answer: whoâs manâs (womanâs)is this?
Simpler simplicity answer: 
I wouldnât expect them to do anything, theyâre the guest
Easy fix ⌠go to her house sit in the recliner and be the queen !! Donât move a finger ⌠usually get the message
Girl bye! Thatâs all you mad at?? She not being overbearing, controlling or disrespectful? Do you know what most ppl go thru with their in laws?? And u mad about a damn dish???
So you invite people over and expect them to clean up? 
Sheâs⌠a guest. She doesnât have to do anything?
Let her know that u did not marry her!! If she respected u she would help out!!! Y donât u try an talk to her an tell her how u feel?
Well she a guest soooo⌠do you expect all your guest to cook and clean when they come over?
She is a guest in your house, why should she have to do anything?
Damn Is that how you treat guests?? 
your lucky anyone comes to your house
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Why would you expect your guests to help? You invited them.
Why do you expect her to help? You invited her. Just tell her beforehand that you would appreciate her help if she wouldnât mind. Grew up in a family of 10âŚwe just know to help and what it feels like while everyone else sits . Serve her plastic and paper and show where the garbage is lol
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How many meals do you think she has served to people without anyone lifting a finger to help her (including your husband all while he was growing up)? In my opinion, our mothers deserve to be treated like royalty for everything they did and sacrificed while raising their families.
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Question Do You make your MIL feel comfortable in your home?
Let her relax and have fun with her granddaughter.Why you expecting her to do what your sorry ass should be doing anyway.
Question? Do you help her cook in her home?
Sheâs your mother in law and a guest ⌠itâs to be expected to do those things
My in-laws are at our house a lot. Even when we cook for them, or them for us, we all fix our own plates, I take care of the dishes at our house so they can have more time with our daughter.
How many times did Mama wait on you while you up and left the table?
What are the customs at her house?
Then donât invite her. Did you expect your guests to wash their plates at your wedding?
Let me ask, how are you treated when you go to visit her? Are you put to work? Or are you treated like a guest?
What do you want her to do?
Cook and wait on you
She is a guestâŚ
How do you act when you and your family visit her??
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Iâd ask how she treats you at her house? Does she treat you that well? Itâs possible sheâs just trying to stay out of your way?
Would your feelings be the same if it were your mother?
If shes staying and your like washing her clothes and shes just adding ALOT to your housework load maybe talk to her and show her what all shes adding to you?
What would you prefer, her going into all your cupboards etc or.you having to serve.her?
Because I can guarantee this will happen
Shes a guest? It dounds like u have a personal issue with her.
My question is when you visit her hpuse what do you do? If your doing stuff. Stop.
We have family over every weekend they never do anything I never asked him to do anything I take care of everybody
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I hear you. Itâs the type of person in my case. 
Do you act that way when you visit her? Sheâs your MIL, just let her be.
Traducen muy mal.no se entienden las ideas.
How do u treat your mother when she comes over??
Tell her the pandemic spiked back up and your countys back in red lol
Sheâs your guest she shouldnât have to help
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what do you expect her to do?
Good for her
Especially if she did everything all her life for her kids in her home
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Seriously 
she is your guest plus your mother in law. Since when guests had to serve themselves in the host house 
? Do you think your house is MacDonalds? Manners no longer exist in this world 
Jesus do you do the same with your mum? I guess not. You are just looking for troubles that is all 
get a hoppy
Im gonna be harsh!! If youâre in my house and youâre a relativeâŚhelp out!!! Period! We all have a lot to do! Iâm not a maidâŚIâm family! Family members are supposed to help each other!!! Period!!! When my mother visits, I canât even leave a cup of water unattended or itâll get dumped and washed. When I visit relatives, I ALWAYS help clean, even if Iâm told no!!! Itâs just common courtesy.
I do not ask for help from any of the grandparents. I want them to enjoy their time with the grandkids 
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I love hearing all the respect and love you all have for your MILs 
. Iâd love to just be welcome in my daughter in laws home. Bless yâall. Keep showing her love
Just remember she has been in yours shoesâŚIts her turn to sit & enjoy family.
Honored guest arenât they?.. I got blessed my mother in law (rest her soul) was a generous woman who came over to cook and clean plus play with her grand babiesđ
If you are hosting anything then no one is obligated help. They are the guest. I personally help clean when Iâm a guest but I do it cus I want to. 
Shes Your Elder You should be making sure shes comfortable!
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Stop having them over. Give w/ out expectations is what I 've been reading & trying to get through my headâŚugh. Good luck!
Give her that royal treatment when she visits!! This is a battle you donât have to have !!!
Speak your mind, what you allow is what will continue. Iâm not a nice person so that isnât saying much lol. good luck
Get over it. If you want to be petty, sit and do nothing when you go to her house.
I would love to have my kids entertained so I could work in my kitchen without the interruptions 
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My mom does the same thing. Sheâs companyâŚshe is allowed to relax
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My mil was always my guest. She gave life to my precious husband. She deserved to be treated like a queen.
I wouldnt expect her to help. She is your guest.
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My MIL raised her kids and spent years doing it for them⌠she helps a lot, but if she wanted to just sit back and not lift a finger⌠Iâm letting her. Same for my mom. I get what theyâve been through as mothersâŚ
Trust me, better than her trying to take over. Gives her extra time with the kids
If sheâs a visitor why would she have to help
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Yes wait on her hand and foot. As well as your mother.
Itâs your house not hers. Guests donât clean my house or cook food.
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Thatâs why I donât have anyone over my house!!!
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For the last 40 years I bet she done everything now itâs time for her to relax 
WOWâŚdo you make everyone cook and clean upon an invite⌠You sound like you need to grow up⌠If you canât be a good host donât invite people
Who has guests and expects them to help!!! And ESPECIALLY YOUR MOTHER IN LAW!!!
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I sure miss my parents and inlaws would love to have spent more time w them count ur blessings.
I would be thankful for my mil to just sit down and stay out of my way
I never ask anyone to help with prep or clean up. Now doing personal chores is another thing!
She has earned the right to sit and play with grandchildren!
You must donât like her much 
everything else is cool besides clearing her plate I would be like oh you left something on the tableâŚ
Make your husband help out when she visits. Thatâs nice she plays with your kids, some MIL do not.
She earned it!
Just do itâŚwhat a small token
i let her know that we let everyone get there own plate of food.
Good luck unless her son says something to her!!!
Well if you invited her over, treat her like a guest. Youâll be glad in the long run
Stop being selfish you invited her deal with it
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Wow⌠You invite people over then expect them to do the work? What a terrible host! My advice stop inviting people over if you donât want to put the work in. Smdh
Sheâs there to see your daughter, her grand daughter. Youâre blessed that she comes! Iâd give anythingâŚ
Thatâs called being a host !
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Umm thats ur guest if u have them over that is what u do i wouldnt ask mine to dinner n expect her to help i invited her
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If you invited her then she shouldnât have to help
Sheâs your guest . If you need or want help maybe you should ask her hummm!!!
Sheâs your guest. She doesnât have to work.
I feel like since I invited her she doesnât have to help. Mine always asked if she could help but I say no
I just wonât invite her over anymore or tell her in a nice way can you help me clear the table please .
Tell her sheâs been there more than once so she is no longer a guest!