No forgive her elderly and any one older than fourth can have memorie loss
I could be wrong but, I donāt know if I would have had an outburst over it. You live far away and donāt have to deal with her often. 2 of my granddaughters live with me part time. Of course, they are part of my every day life. My youngest granddaughter only lives 20 minutes away.
My in-laws have 12 grandchildren on one side and 23 on the other side and guess what they remember birthdays,participate and know there damn names. Itās not hard I know all my nieces and nephews birthdays and names. Get a damn calendar and keep track damn how lazy and disrespectful I would have lost my shit and if hubby didnāt back me heād be on the shit list to because my kids come before anyone else donāt give af
Maybe your MIL is experiencing mental lapses because of age. Be cool. She knows who they are.
I canāt remember either of those things and I only have 1 grandchild.
Iām sorry, let me expound on my first comment. Yes, you are crazy to be upset with your husband and crazier to have caused such a rift before this latest bad episode of yours.
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The little things that bother you now , you will miss later when sheās gone ! Sheās present - just absent minded. Enjoy her while you can.
give it up and let it goā¦they r old and perhaps, forgetful! dont take this sooo seriously and just let them be!!!
How about calling her and remind her. A week in advance.
Unless and until this women is suffering from some sort of mental deline, ITāS NEVER ACCEPTABLE TO FORGET YOUR GRANDCHILDENāS NAME(S).
#WHO does that ?
#WTF
Tell your husband to get
ahold of himself and straighten his motherās balant disrespectfulness out.
Sounds like a daughter in law trying to break up her husbandās Family. Selfishness
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Many years ago I asked my oldest sons grandmother to pickup a copy of his birth certificate bec I couldnāt get to the town hall before it closed and I needed it urgently. When she got there she gave them his wrong birth year and they told her they had no record of any such person and he was with her so she said well here he is so he does exist. I think he was 4/5. She called me all upset and when she told me why I said well what did they say was wrong she said his birthday I said well what did you tell them she told me and I chuckled I said well thereās the problem you were a year off go back a year. She went back told the lady the date(correctly this time) and off they went. People forget things, making a federal case out of something so trivial is gonna cause you to be a problem and be seen poorly in all their eyes. Of course she sees family that lives closer more often they live closer. Of course she isnāt going to leave her horses and drive however long back and forth for what a half hour visit itās not plausible. If you want your kids to have a relationship with her YOU go to her be understanding of the situation instead of petty and jealous. I hate my mother in law, when my kids were young we live 5 minutes from her and she never visited them she always guilted my husband into taking them to her until she caused a huge fight on my youngest bday and we never spoke to her ever again. Maybe the reason your relationship with her isnāt good anymore is bec of how youāre acting and also I donāt know many teenagers who wanna visit grandma. If itās an issue maybe ask them to volunteer to help her with her horses itās hard work BUT itās also helping family. Stop sweating small things there are much more important things to be upset over than missing bday parties and forgetting middle names.
Maybe she has a problem remembering stuff. Iām 68 & I forget Drs apps , parties to go to. I have CRS., cant remember shit! Donāt make such a big deal out of it!
You are immature and also vindictive, donāt pass those traits on to your children.
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MIL may have mild cognitive problems. Give her the benefit of the doubt. Donāt make mountains out of molehills. Apologize and enjoy your time together. Let it go!
How old is she? She might be getting forgetful. I donāt really think itās that big of a deal
I get my own childrenās names wrong. Usually canāt tell how old they are. I remember the day but not the year that they were born.
Did you ever think that maybe she is having memory loss!! Good LORDā¦Dont be so SELFISH!!!
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Your MIL is getting older. Maybe she just forgets. You sound like a brat. If this is your normal behavior , it must be hard to live anywhere with you
My mom couldnāt remember my sons middle name and itās one she picked out! Smh
My MIL is the same way. But. I tell my husband itās ok our kids know they love them and people have their choice of a pick of a litter. But, I would not refuse any family member to see my kids. Now I do allow my kids to choose who they want to see or talk to. But, if it is a big discussion how about you, hubby, mil, fil, sit and have a adult conversation and everyone go in with a open mind and see if they will understand the hurt and yall fix things.
I forget birthdays all the time! Doesnāt mean I love them less.
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She probably means absolutely no harm. Iām terrible with names and dates. Itās not that I donāt care, but some may think thatās a problem. I have two sons, and if I donāt call each by the otherās name at least once a day, ( when thereās a lot happening and when they were growing up), they would have been surprised. There are a number of men in the family, so i might have a list to go through before getting to the right one for that moment. They know this as well as I do, but they donāt get upset. Its almost a joke by now. Relax, give your MIL a brag-book with pictures and special dates for every family member. Make it small enough that she can carry it as a ābrag-bookā anywhere she goes. Try to keep the pictures up to date. She will brag about how much they have grown and how precious they are. You might get close again. You mentioned that you enjoyed that. She must have also. Prayers for you and your family.
Since this has been ongoing for years, expecting Change seems unrealistic. Yes, it would be better if MIL remembered kids names but you take what you get. Itās not like you can trade them in. Encourage your kids not to take it personally by YOU not taking it personally
You forgot to tell us how old grandma is.
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I read the comments, and I think that you are spending WAY TOO MUCH TIME , in ME time. Get over this nonsense. You must be a huge burden for all of those around you.
Grow up. Maybe her memory is fading.
Who cares about the middle name, we only used it if the kid was in trouble! Lol
lady, you are a DRAMA queen. Seriously? I get being irritated, but the throw a temper tantrum and not speak to anyone for days over it? Grow the F up. Jesus.
Well out right punish your husband for something as trifling as that. Get over it they are not babyās and Iām sure are not crying cus grandma in law forgotā¦go see you husbandās family be the bigger person your kids will thank you for it
I disagree with the majority of comments here. I think your feelings and thoughts are totally valid. Everything you described would hurt me a lot too.
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Quit pouting and just remind her. When people get older, they forget things they arenāt reminded of frequently. Get over it.
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Damn woman. My mother only has two kids. For years sheās been calling me by my sisterās name!!!
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It depends. If itās dementia, deal with but. But if she can remember the others, then be mad. Sometimes Grandma has favorite and donāt care for the other.
You are making a mountain out of a molehill. Is it worth it? I am glad you are not my DIL.
You need a dose of Dr. Phil. Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?
Hereās my storyā¦ā¦ Iām the mother in law at this point in lifeā¦ā¦ when I was the daughter in law I was infuriated on more than one occasion with my in laws pertaining to my boys and their seemingly lack of concern for knowing them and of course I vented to now X but as far as my in laws were concerned I sucked it up. Seeing how my X was raised with what I would call a superficial love gave me insight. I had to come to terms with the fact that not everyone loves in the same wayā¦ā¦ and being a Christian I stuck to honor thy father and mother. Anyone who has raised kids and lives to tell deserves respect. Now, my situation with my DIL ā¦ā¦ I bent over backwards when my 1st grandchild was born to welcome her and love my grand babies but it was never enoughā¦. She was attached to her motherās apron strings and I was an outsider no matter what. I used to say that she held my grandbabies for randsom! Lol As in if I could pay for this or that I could see them. And no Iām not kiddingā¦ā¦ I finally moved away to be close to my other son and his children as my heart was breaking and I couldnāt take it anymore. I still kept in touch always sending BD and Christmas gifts as well as paying for this or that when asked. Then one year I was going through my own crisis with work etc. and forgot my oldest grandsons BD. Stop the world from turning! I was a piece of dirt! I dutifully called and apologized profusely. Thought it was all going to pass but then my son called and started in on me about it. 
Then the DIL started accusing me of stuff and yelling at meā¦ā¦ I lost it, I might take that crap from my son but not from her, especially while he is standing there with not a word to say! I might also mention I never said the things I was being accused of! Well after I said my peice, it was done. They no longer speak to me and I was not even invited to my grandsons graduation. There is a side of me that regrets speaking up for myself but there is another side that most assuredly deserves more respect than either of them have ever given me. I was good to both of them even when they treated me badly. I have never received not one Motherās Day card or gift since they have been marriedā¦. Thatās like 12 years! I think I did once receive a birthday gift which put me in shock! Lol They must have wanted something but I canāt really remember now. At any rate my son and I have not spoken in about 5 to 8 years. Itās sad and I miss him and my grandkids horribly but as the saying goesā¦ā¦ you have to give respect to get respect. I gave them plenty of respect and knew my boundaries for years. The sadest part is that I am 65 and wonāt live forever! My son, not her, will have to live with this for the rest of his life. I guess the question here is how have you treated her in the past? A daughter is a daughter for the rest of her life but a son is a son until he takes a wife. So true! You have two boys? You might want to think on that one! Good luck with whatever you decide to do but try to remember that your boys need not be hurt by all this unless you let it happen and ultimately it will be your husband that will pay the price if you lose your temper over such a small thing. Life happens, people are human, mistakes are madeā¦ā¦ let it go because inside every man is a little boy that loves his momma!
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I forgot my step sons b day and didnāt know ow one of their middle names.
As parents get older their memories usually start to fail. I happen to be horrible with dates, including birthdays. I would hope that my kids wouldnāt blame or guilt me because of a failing that I have.
Prayers for you if the worst thing she does is forget a name or birthday you are blessed! No one is perfect so I pray for you all and hope you can giver her a break ā¦!
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Could she have early onset dementia?
Let it go. Remind her once in a while. Iām 79. And donāt always remember either.
You are ! wrongā¦I do that and every one has a good laughā¦be happy you have a great familyā¦thank GOD. Every day for themā¦I do
Get over it ,there are more important things to worry about,its a waste of PRECIOUS time.
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She may be getting dementia I would try to be a lil more understanding and compassionate
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Why would you get angry? Just ask her and stop being judgemental of her
Wow. Get over yourself. If sheās aging its common. Hopefully, you donāt ever grow old. Ruining your childrenās relationship with their grandparents bc you choose to act like a snot, isnāt teaching them anything.
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Could she have some dementia?
I donāt remember my grandkids Birthdays , I have a lot , I put them on my calendars. My kids donāt get mad at me .
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My dad calls my son jeremiah, jeremy and hes 4 now 
i think its funny and my parents dont even remember my bday sometimes i dont expect them to always remember my kids
Wow 
ā¦ if that causes you to create a righteous scene ā¦ I would say you may be a little self righteous.
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I do it all the time my grandkids laugh at me and say Iām so and so. Oh dang sorry! We laugh
Donāt be too mad! She may have memory loss! I starts slowly
It will eat you alive if you let it. Forgive to make your soul whole again. Grace, peace, and wellness.
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Sometimes I forget my kids birth date!!
I think you owe your husbands mom an apology. You are acting like a spoiled child. I love all my grandchildren. They are all special in different ways. Someday when your mother in law is gone you are going to feel really bad for your husband. Remind her of their birthdays and middle names if itās that important to you but you are not setting a good example for your children. Sorry but you need to grow up!
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Older we get the more we forgetā¦give her a break
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My dad hasnāt remembered my birthday since the day I was born lol
You are soo pettyā¦ and sounds toxicā¦ pheew. Kudos to your hubby if heās still have hanging in there.
Lady please relax ā¦nothing to get hyper overā¦
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Just remember one day you will be a MIL & a grandmotherā¦ask yourself do you want to be treated like you are treating herā¦
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Life is too shortā„ļø
Move on
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!life is 2 short people love each other while u can
I donāt even get my sons name right 
I constantly call him his dads middle name
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Drama queen raising son to be the same. Lighten up!
Get over it honey! This time next year she might not be here!
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Life is to short for this! It is what it is, just move on!
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My grandfather called me my dogs name lol
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Wow reallyā¦so glad you not my daughter in law
U should be glad she is there, sometime she wonāt be. Remember that
Never mind birthdays I forget there names let it go love dont torture ur self
Shake it offā¦talk to your MIL ā¦Apologize for being a big babyā¦ask for her forgivenessā¦you are going to be in her shoes one day ā¦!
Lady the problem is not your in-lawsā¦itās all about you. I suggest you seek help and God bless you.
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im terrible with dates. it doesnāt mean she doesnāt love them. you are being childish
Wow you are sensitive. Let it go I am sure she is not doing it purposely.
Iām glad my kids donāt get upset with me over things like this. Poor lady.
What good will it do to be mad. No show love, your kids will get more out love for her than mad
You need help. Learn to forgive and let things go. Poor MIL must be so afraid of you.
People forget things and sometimes very important things. Donāt take it personally.
Maybe she has dementia.
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Live & let live!
Next year, just remind her.
Sit down and talk to her like an adult. You are acting childish. Be glad they still have grandparents
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Anty hit your head for grinding stone
I canāt even remember my own name sometimes
Maybe she is suffering from Alzehmer
You sound way extra. If I donāt get a notification that itās someoneās birthdayā¦ Including my own siblingsā¦ I wonāt remember. I canāt remember my own kids names half the time, I called my youngest by the dogs name.last week. Why is someone always posting complaining about their mother in lawās?
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Perhaps beginning of dementia. Give her a calendar for Christmas. Paste pics of your kids on their birthdates
Could she have slight dementia.
All these people taking up for the MIL. Try being on the other end of this situation as the grandchild. It freaking SUCKS!
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I think that you want to grow up
Get a a life if that is your only problem
Please donāt look for things to be upset about. Love her and support her
Wow so you threw a whole tantrum? Iām widowed and would give anything for 1 more day, even if it meant spending it with his horrible mom. Possible she may have dementia? He should dump you for sure
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Grow up ladyā¦ Maybe get a hobby, sounds like you have to much time to bitch about pointless crapš¤¦āāļø
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Do you love your kids??? Yep bet you do. So what she thinks or says, doesnāt matter. DOES ITš
Glad Im not your mother in law. Youāve got lots of āshould ofsā for how you require OTHERS to behave. MIL is human. Not perfect. How ever can you stand it? 
. Grow up already. And stop planting grievances in your childrenās minds against their grandmother
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Omg! Stop being so petty and jealous ! ā¦lifeās too short!!
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Why in gods name you would call a kid X or Y is beyond meā¦ 
Hell Iām 53 and have 7 grandchildren and one on the way. If I donāt put it in my calendar, Iād miss half of them 
I didnt enjoy reading this simply because its petty.