I facetime my parents as I’m the only child that isn’t near them. I got them on the phone. My dad said who birthday is it. I kindly reminded him and they got to have fun watching on facetime. I can absolutely 100% Know they do no know my children’s birthdays. They are 30 and 31. They are the oldest grandchildren. I usually send a little reminder to help them remember
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I think you’re over reacting. Has she been under a lot of stress lately? I’m only 35 and there have been times when I’ve been super stressed that it took me a minute to remember my own birthday. Also, could this be an early sign of dementia? It usually starts with little things like names, bdays, etc. And it’s usually more noticeable with people they don’t see as often. My ex’s grandmother knew exactly who her older daughter was because she was her caretaker. She had no clue who her younger daughter was because she lived several states away. Tbh I’d be worried about her, not angry with her.
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Sorry but you sound extremely petty and immature.
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Everyone on here is being rude as fuck. You’re entitled to your feelings. I would be hurt if my children’s names or bdays were forgotten (which they have been) but I tend to not make a big fuss about it because I sometimes forget stuff like that. N that’s ur husbands mother I believe u should always bite ur tongue or if u cant atleast have a heart to heart w her instead of a blow up.
I understand why you might be hurt, but I honestly think you are overreacting. She might have a bad memory or developing dementia.
At least she remembers their first name. Be glad of that.
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Well the name i might get a bit upset about but birthdays…no. My mother in law will get upset when she forgets because her other daughter in law raises hell. But there are over eleven grandkids and that’s not counting the great grandkids. I know she loves the kids so I don’t let it bother me
My mom and mother in law remember all their grandkids middle names but not always birthdays. My mom got lucky with 2 of the 3 having the same birthday so she remembers just fine. It would drive me crazy but I think the whole dramatic scene was to much. Your son should tell her though that she hurt his feelings so they can chat about it. He’s an adult now and you shouldn’t be fighting his battles
I think you owe a lot of people apologies for causing unneeded drama. My mom has 1 grand child she see’s every day and she still forgets his middle name on occasion. Getting older is no fun, especially when you have someone humiliating you for it.
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I cant even rememner my own kids birthdays… i think you may need reel it in a lil bit.
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You sound like a child. I don’t even remember my own birthday sometimes. The only thing that seems to be hurt here is your ego. 
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I honestly feel like you’re overreacting. My own mom forgets things all the time. Will call me by my sister’s names or my daughter by my niece’s name… Would not be mad if she forgot my daughter’s middle name & she sees her all the time. The only reason everyone knows my daughter’s birthday is because she was born on Christmas Eve lol. I think it’s just an old person thing to be forgetting this stuff & not a big deal.
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I was my grandmothers first grandchild… and I was the favorite. As she got older, she would call me every name in the family before finally saying my name. Lol. It was a running joke for years that she could forget her favorite grandchilds name. Lol
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My dad never even spelled my name right on every card or anything that included a name it always said Angle.
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Half the time I can’t remember my own kids birthday and always call them by the wrong name!! Move on already!
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I’m an only child with 2 kids of my own. I don’t think my parents know exact birthdays and the sun rises and falls on my kids in their eyes.
Half the time I mess up my own kids birthday lol 
not really a big deal imo
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Shes doing it on purpose to get to you!!! Give it right back to her!!! And forget her you know their bday if shes that disingaged let her be its her loss. Dont let her win by letting her know it makes you feel bad its a dig at you and him for not being around more its petty of her but she’s set in her ways. Ask the kids what they want how they feel about it what do they want to do.
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I don’t remember my kids names half the time and mix up date of births at the doctors all the time. And I’m not even old cut her some slack. I feel like this is nothing to be mad about.
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I am a mother of two men. Both the love of my life.My oldest son gave me a grandson.The love of my life. Sometimes I forget their birthday……. So please keep peace in the family , you are overreacting.
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Does she possibly have memory issues? Dementia and Alzheimer’s can start 10 years before actual diagnosis slight memory issues are like the first symptom. Years later it gets worse with irregular sleep patterns,weight gain or loss. It can take a long time to have the full effect. Just be kind.
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Are any of you ladies Southern? I ask, because the family tree, including birth, death and marriage dates, with full names, have been ingrained into many of us since birth, at least 3 generations back. Perhaps the issue lies in the differences between 2 families and their expectations. Where I come from, everyone has a monogram, so this grandma would have as least had a prominently displayed middle initial to guess from.
“ I caused a righteous scene” Um well, excuse tf outta me 
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You sound exhausting
So you’re wanting everyone to be upset
Hope nothing detrimental ever happens to you. Would hate to see how you handle that
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You dont live close and your kids dont spend much time there… You have no real right to get pissy… Now if your kids spent as much time with them as the others then yeah youd have e leg to stand on… Do you often call your kids “first and second name” when you are around inlaws?? Do the other kids get called both names regularly??
Sigh… Its not worth the fight… Pick your battles… Hell my kids are only 20 17 and 14 and i will still get jumbled up with them and go through the whole family before getting the right name… AND THEYRE MY KIDS… My grandma did the same and i was her favorite…
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Wow…… you would hate my MIL, and the cheap insults she throws🤦🏼♀️. I wish it was only forgetting birthdays and middle names🤷🏼♀️.
Consider yourself lucky that you are close, don’t cause trouble towards her over petty things!
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I mix up my own kids birthdays and names, The brains not the most reliable sometimes. I wouldn’t look at it as she loves them any less, your brain works with what’s most commonly in front of it more.
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Let it go im sure there’s more pressing issues to be concerned with.
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You showed your ass just like she wanted you to. She’s playing you like a fiddle 
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No grandparents get a pass they already raised their kids and had to remember their names and birthdays also she didn’t birth or name your child right so she gets a pass plus forgetfulness comes with age and how many grandchildren does she have plus her immediate family
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You are extra as hell! 
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You sound super immature. This definitely isn’t nearly as big of a deal as you’re making it. My mom has 9 kids, 5 of which have significant others and now 10 grand babies. You know what we did to help her keep track? We made her a birthdays and anniversary calendar. Middle names are not important and certainly not important enough to be so upset about. If you’re that worried about it, make her a calendar. 
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You’re just jealous. Grow up I can’t believe what I just read.
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You have the right to feel any way you want. I don’t agree with you at all though. It seems like you’re trying to make everyone be on your side and when they’re not you’re more upset. At some point you’re going to have to let it go for your husband’s sake.
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You have made it such a “big deal”, to the point that now your son thinks so as well. How does that affect your life if you don’t even see her that often??? Don’t waste time on things that won’t matter in a few years. Enjoy what you can and let go of any negatives and jealousies, stop wasting your energies!!!
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You’re exhausting. Stop tearing your husband from his mother for petting arguments.
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I barely remember birthdays . But I do remember some bdays . I don’t think it’s a big deal to be honest . Plus she’s getting older , her memory may just be getting bad 
I def wouldn’t have caused a scene
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sorry but you sound exhausting. It’s really not that big of a deal.
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I can’t remember the day of the week some days…or why I walked into a room
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What is that to be mad about? I have to remind both of my parents of my birthday, names, age and etc etc etc. You are doing to much Shawty! SMH 
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I remind my mum about everyone’s birthday all the time. Just remind her so she don’t forget and she forever calls my niece a similar name but always pronounces it wrong haha I laugh at her… don’t understand why it’s such a big hassle
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Yikes. Who thinks this much into things… Definitely over reacting. I’d say you should apologize to everybody.
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I don’t think it’s really a big deal unless it did hurt your kids feelings before they knew you were upset. Some kids are only upset because they see mom is… But your child needs to stick up for themselves if it hurt them. It’s not your place in my eyes they are old enough to say something.
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I am a grandma and somehow accidentally called my grandson the wrong name a couple of weeks ago. I felt awful because I did catch it as soon as I did it but I would hope my DIL would not have taken it personally. I am just scatter brained at times after 5 children and 2 grandchildren. That being said I do want to add that I do get that your MIL may favor your BIL’s children and that is probably why you took offense to this like you did. I do get how that feels and in that situation I think you get to feel a certain way. Maybe sit down and have a talk with her about it and give her everyone’s names and birthdays in writing and let it go because at the end of the day it only hurts your heart and soul to hold on to the anger and disappointment this has caused.
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welcome to real life…
My mom doesn’t always remember birthday or anniversaries I just remind her. No big deal. He’ll for the first 6 years I was with my husband and the first 3 years of my daughters life she never got our last name right. Just give a reminder
Your feelings are valid. Who is anyone else to tell you how and what to feel? That would upset me too. I think the best way to handle it would be to let her know why it upset you and talk about it together. Make a phone date if you have to. It might take a lot of stress off your shoulders!
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I’m a grandmama, and I use the wrong name all the time. Call my son by my grandson name, etc, etc. getting old means forgetting simple stuff but remembering the people you love. It may hurt but you but you let it go, as long as it’s not intentional. Intentions do matter, as well as family matters. Weigh the odds and don’t be petty. Or envious of the other kids’ being loved. 2 wrongs don’t make a right
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If this is what constitutes a major crisis for you I’m jealous. I don’t usually comment if I don’t have anything nice to say, but yikes- get a grip. I hope if your memory ever starts to slip you have far more compassionate people than yourself surrounding you.
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My grandmother called me Melissa for years…my name is Michelle. Lol
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So how old is she right now??
My mom only had one child.
You guessed it, me.
She only has two grand babies.
My two daughters.
We haven’t heard anything from her since Christmas. She lives 20 minutes away. We all have phones & nobody has moved in the past 6 years. She called at 8pm tonight to wish my five year old a Happy Birthday. Her first born grand child. My daughter turned five in June. Be thankful for what you have. I would give anything to have my mother-in-law here to help watch her grand babies grow up & for my own mother to have kicked her battle with addiction 30+ years ago, so my children could have an actual present grand mother who consistently shows up & loves them. Turn the other cheek & be thankful you have her.
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Whoa !! Back off the after burners !! Can you say OVERREACTING ??? That’s what you’ve done !! Wow !! Maybe she’s showing signs of memory issues … Maybe you need some healing … I hope you’re able to overcome your feelings, get grounded & work on fixing what is broken within you & are able to heal the dysfunction in your family that has been happening …
Sending you good juju you need it, she needs it & your family needs it !!
🧘🏻♀️
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I bet she has dimension
Ugh I hope my son doesn’t marry someone like this one day shewwwwww.
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Girl you need help. You obviously have some built up anger and resentment for her that’s finally made you crack… this all started over birthdays? You need to go talk to a therapist
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This may surprise you but as we age our memory fails m o.o re and more. I understand being upset but you are being a drama queen. How about giving her a custom made calendar every year wirh important dates and birthdays. Using photos of the birthday person for the monthly image. Include all of her family members bitrhdays and anniversaries.
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I forget my kids age sometimes and mine… it’s all cool.
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I mix my own kids and nieces and nephews names up sometimes when they’re all together. Give her a break, you said yourself she doesn’t see them that much. My MIL lives a couple hours away, my brother-in-law and his wife live much closer to her and therefore she spends more time with their kids and seems to know a little more about them and it doesn’t bother me because of course she does when she sees them more. That woman doesn’t care less about your kids just like my MIL doesn’t care less about mine. She just isn’t around them as much. You sound jealous and bitter and gross. Chill.
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Oh please I’m a mother of 4 and I sometimes forget and 2 kids are 2 days apart in birthdays and I forget which ones
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Seriously you have got to be joking. My paternal grandfather called me Girl tell I was 16 and he stayed with us after a surgery . I have at many times myself looked at child, niece, nephew and said more than 1 child name till I got it right LOL. So not a big deal unless you are needing a reason to make a fuss ?? That’s honestly what it sounds like.
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Pull up to the pharmacy to pick up meds and i forget my own kids birthday and middle names
Cut her some slack. My mom forgets my age and birthday too.
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I call my kids by the wrong names most days. I personally think you are overreacting
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I don’t even remember my own kids middle names and birthdays half the time, I have 3 and mix them up alllll the time. No biggie, none of that changes how someone feels towards the child.
Omg are you serious. I’ve a mother of 4 grown children and I can’t remember my name half the time. Very shallow. I love my grandchildren very much but I also work 50 hours a week and have horses to tend to so somebody better speak up and tell me that their birthday is coming up and what do they want.
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LMFAO!!! Aren’t you just the little princess?! lol lol lol!! No wonder your MIL has stayed the hell away from you! I can only imagine the bitchy vibes you’ve been putting out since the mid-90s! Get over yourself! Seriously!
So…my thought is that you need to put your MIL to the side for a minute and think about what you are doing to your husband. Be as mad as you want, but in the end, it’s your husband who is going to pay the price. Is it really worth doing that to him? Putting him through that emotional torture by making him feel trapped between you two? Worth potentially ruining your marriage? You are already over a year into this one issue and, one day, he’s going to make a choice that you might not like.
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Lighten the fuck up lol. I forget my own birthday sometimes. People aren’t perfect no matter how much you think they should be. My parents had a lot of kids and forgot our names in the middle of conversation. Several time. Shit happens. Lol
My own mother who no doubt loved me dearly called me pat lori barb and my name is Samantha then after my little sister was born 10 years after me she called me Shannon and called shannon Samantha so it happens .
My mom lives with us spend all of our vacations with us and she doesn’t know my kids middle names or birthdays. I just remind her close to their birthdays. Nobody needs to know your middle name.
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Growing up, my Gram called me every other name but my own 
shes old and memory issues might actually be present, without her even knowing. If you don’t use it, you lose it…being that your so distant to begin with, and she doesn’t have to use your children’s names on a regular basis, it is possible she is having a real problem that’s going unnoticed.
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My own dad called me at 19 to aske how to spell first name. Mind you my parents have been together my whole life. Life goes on. Get over it. She also be suffering from the onset of dementia.
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My grandma was with me for 34 wonderful years and she til the day she died couldn’t remember My middle name or spell my first name for the life of her. My mil only remembers my sons (her first grandchilds) middle name but couldn’t tell you my daughter full name if you spelled it out for her. My kids are the only grandchildren. Does she love them. Fuck yes she does. Does it bother me?? NOPE why you ask? Cause the love she shows my babies goes beyond the name she calls them. Did it hurt my grandma didn’t know my middle name?? Fuck no! Why cause the love she had for me went beyond it. It was the hug and kiss when she said “hi Mija” or when she called my kids her “guerito/guerita”. Don’t take it to heart. Judge her by the love she has for your children not by what she can remember.
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How old is she? People do get forgetful… I have hypothyroidism and serious brain fog. My husband literally has to stop and figure out our kids birthdays, we have 5. How did she treat your kids other than messing up a middle name? And I don’t expect my family to memorize everyone’s birthday’s.
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I literally mix up my first born sons birthday alllll the time 
the day and the year. It’s out of numerical order and it always gets me when I’m asked I don’t feel like there’s truly enough information, there’s probably more to your aggravation than just her forgetting those things. Honestly, if you’re upset, you don’t have to explain! That is your husbands mother, he is probably upset too but also wants to just brush it off.
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My parents have 18 grandchildren and wouldn’t expect them to remember the bdays they have a rough idea.
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He should be upset but he never actually will be.
I don’t remember my own birthday girl.
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Couldn’t even finish this. Take some time to work on you and give everyone else a break. There are much more important things and you are causing unnecessary stress on yourself and everyone around you.
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I am the oldest grand child, my maternal grandparents were my full-time babysitters until I was old enough to be left alone, they now live with me and my husband and child and they get my first name wrong on a daily basis. Grow up and stop teaching your son’s to be petty. Grandparents aren’t the parents they don’t need to remember everything
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If she has more grandchildren besides yours it can be hard to keep track after so many. Sounds like you are overreacting and owe your husband and his mother an apology
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Get over yourself. I adore my grandkids, but unless I look at my calendar, have no idea what their birthdays are and have to think really hard what their middle names are. And they live close and we see them frequently! And I’m only 60!!!
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I just can’t wrap my mind around being that upset over a birthday or middle name…
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Girl get df over it and stop being dramatic I’m usually not harsh and I’m very understanding but you’re being petty. My kid name is Carson and they call him Carter and I’m constantly saying his name is Carson not Carter but I’m not petty enough to stop talking to them and be upset about it. I laugh and go by my business as you should and birthdays are hard for everyone to remember. My favorite Aunt’s birthday is in August but do you think I know the exact day NO! I don’t ever remember it and I’m 28
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Not taking up for Grandma but is it possible that being older she is experiencing some memory issues? If not then try to overlook/ignore her behavior for your husbands sake. I understand the hurt you and your son feel but let it go. Do not reward her bad behavior. If this is a jab for whatever slight (real or imagined) she may harbor then that’s on her. Do not allow yourself to become upset. Instead forgive her, ignore her antics, and carry on as if nothing is wrong! To her it may not be an intentional slight. If it is sooner rather than later I believe she will cease that nonsense if she doesn’t get the desired reaction. These visits are short. They seem to mean alot to your husband so give him the gift of a peaceful no drama visit. I guarantee HE will appreciate your efforts. That said I have a slew of grands so I often have roll call before I hit on the correct name. My family just accept it as Nana’s having a momentary brain blip. I also tend to mix up or forget some birth dates. It is not on purpose just not information readily available to me sometimes. To help me keep it straight I got a birthday board. It is a board with the months listed up top. It has hooks under them to hang a disk. The disk has the family member/friends name and birth date. Why don’t you gift her one. Go ahead and fill in her husband, son’s and their families names and birth dates. This will perhaps solve the problem.
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My own mother doesn’t know how to spell my sons first name correctly, or any of my kids last names… and forget about middle names, I don’t think she knows any of them… but you know what… it’s not a big deal, she loves them and thats what matters. I suggest choosing your battles because one day they won’t be around and when that time comes, will the spelling of a middle name really matter 
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I think that you have the right to feel disappointed, however, I don’t think it should so much to cause a dramatic scene. I think that your expectations are too high for others and to be honest, sometimes we shouldn’t expect anything from anyone. I’m not sure if the lady is elderly, but things are not as easy as they seem for them. I think you should really take a look in the mirr0r and re-evaluate your stance on this.
I mean… sometimes I accidentally call my own kids by the dog’s name 
you’d hate me 
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I pray to God every day that my boys don’t marry someone as petty and self absorbed as you
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Lol unreal. Thats you causing drama for no reason!
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Have you ever considered her age? Have you asked of family history with dementia or alzheimers? It most likely wasnt intentional and I think you are absolutely over reacting, your probably lucky it was just a week that your husband didnt talk to you. Going to a hotel over something so silly was just dramatic.
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My own dad forgot my birthday ok.
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My Mother Can’t Remember My Daughters FIRST name & She’s 12yrs. She calls her Granny (Been Calling Her That Since Birth) & If She needs my daughters name for any reason she will call me and ask me what it is and how to spell it….
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I understand that you feel upset, but your expectations of her are way to high, you shouldn’t be going to sleep st a hotel over something a name and a birthdates or even expect your husband to join you in being angry about it.
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Yeah you are being super petty. Let it go.
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I call my kids by the wrong name sometimes…lol
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Pull your head out of your butt and quit being dramatic.
I have grand kids and I don’t know there middle names and sometime I forget there brithday that why I write it down and u say the grandkids r living close and she see them alot more so she use to there names more but I understand how u feel but talk to her don’t let this mess up the family and as for my great grand kids I can’t say there names right that why they have Nick names from me let it go and enjoy the families while u til have them
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Nothing to be made about . She probably can’t even remember her owen birthday.
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Oh chill. My husband has our own kids birthdays tattooed around his wrist. Not everyone’s memory is flawless if it’s not something they encounter daily.
Now come on half the time i forget my kids bdays, ur in the wrong the world doesn’t revolve aroumd u, u r the problem nobody else and ur kids feelings r hurt because u r the problem
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