My partner has had so many kids!

Really? This is what you’re starting over today :joy: you’re gonna be your own worst enemy woman, best to count your blessings and keep it moving.

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A womanizer. I think boasting about something isn’t even an awesome achievement. Unless he is maintaining and being involved in his children lives. Like he gives an effort of being a father, then I congratulate him for he has taken care of his responsibilities. I just hope you don’t build low self-esteem because of his story. Sending Love, peace and blessings :purple_heart:

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I’d be more concerned about how he feels about 14 of his babies being aborted.

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This whole situation is sick!!!

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You feel like HE got passed around like a piece of meat???

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Ewwww. No thank you. Blech.

Girl he sounds like someone whose given more rides then a grey hound bus​:nauseated_face::nauseated_face::face_vomiting::face_vomiting: that’s just nasty I could never…

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We’ve all got a past, we’ve all done things we’re not necessarily proud of or things that were apart of who we were at that point in our lives. This is a conversation you two need to have, because I think you feel so unsettled over it is due to your own insecurities. He may have been ready to settle down now, grow up and have a family to come home to, not necessarily settle for you because he’s already had everything. If you love him, he loves you, and you guys have an otherwise good relationship, don’t sit there in your own thoughts and make the situation feel worse inside for you, because nothing good can come for that. Talk with him. It doesn’t matter how it would make others feel, you feel it, so deal with it, with your man! You’ll find your answer there!
Good luck!

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Isn’t slut shaming frowned upon these days?

If you’ve been with him for three years, y’all really should’ve discussed your sexual history already. If he lied about it, that’s super crappy and I see why you’re upset. If he told you in the beginning or you two just decided not to talk about it, idk I don’t understand it. If he’s been loyal to you for these three years and continues to do so, his past shouldn’t matter. It’s the present, live in it. Dwelling on the past before you has the possibility of ruining your relationship.

*bragging about your past sexual experiences with your current partner is also pretty crappy.

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My bf had 4 before me by 4 different women. We now have 3. His exes dont let him c the kids but if they did I’d accept them as my own. I still claim my bonus princess from my previous relation ship. (My exes daughter) she never asked for us to date or to split. Shes still my princess.

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So your with someone and baby momma #3? No red flag there I take it :joy:

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And just cuz you have kids with someone doesn’t mean their was anything their. So don’t be jealous of your bf having kids with these women cuz he might of not even liked him. (I had kids with guys I didn’t like). I was abused as a teenager to adulthood from my mother so I slept with guys to try to feel important has I was trying to heal from my abuse. But I have grown since then but I have two kids and didn’t love their dads

Lol there’s a potential to fall pregnant EVERY time you have sex. 14 previous abortions. Doesnt say if it was 14 other woman for all we know some of them could of been with the same baby mamas over a span of years some could of been one night stands. At least its not 14 other children he has nothing to do with… damn people are so judgey

honestly it’s disgusting you think of him this way.

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All men,i think,have an eccentric past. If has slept with only 30 or so women…lucky. However…it is how he takes care of his woman and kids that matters. Does he treat his kids like they matter and you matter? That is what is important…as well as being free of STDs before started anything together. Lol

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My husbands dad has had a bunch of kids to a lot of different women. It’s great!

Thats like saying every time you had sex befor him. I alomst had a baby

What? And I thought my baby daddy was bad.

If you’re making a throw up emoji regarding him, there’s your answer

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There’s nothing wrong with having multiple past sexual partners. It doesn’t make you dirty or used.
What matters is how he treats his kids, and how he treats you.

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Does this man not know what a condom is???

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Girl he could easily be a serial proliferator. Aka he loves putting his seed across the globe knowing his legacy will live on in lots of offspring.

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:woman_shrugging: everyone has a ho phase. Let’s not have a double standard with the slut shaming :joy:

Do you really want some one else’s garbage ??

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Why is he just telling you now ?

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Assuming that the other 11 were aborted, I’m sad for those babies. I’m pro choice but I’m also pro life when so many women want babies and cannot have them.

I don’t care about how many people he’s slept with. Being concerned that someone has been passed around like a “piece of meat” is slut shaming. What WOULD concern me is his lack of awareness in how babies are made, and his lack of concern for safe sex. Like someone else said, does this man not know what a condom is, or does he just delight in the idea of getting abortions and STIs?

You could have asked before you got into heavy relationship with him

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I knew a guy like that who was proud of his number of abortions, I hope he was proud of his child support he paid out to . Try putting on a condom . Some men are… yea

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I don’t associate myself with anyone with that type of mindset. You so disrespectful.

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14 kids with different women you deserve better

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I seriously doubt God ordained your relationship ?

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3 years and you’re just finding this out?

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Why did he let you know after 3 Years. And did he act proud while saying that?

I’d I was in your shoes I would leave. He doesn’t sound responsible or mature at all.

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It wouldn’t bother me. Like, it’s whatever. I hate kids, so I wouldn’t wanna be around them, but you can’t always prepare yourself. And there’s not a whole lot of info here.

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My sons dad has “six kids and a possible”(his words) all of them different mother’s. We aren’t together anymore but it doesn’t bother me. If you know you know.

Ewww he hasn’t been passed around like a piece of meat lol. He chose to sleep with all kinds of people.

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I agree 100% Theresa

He is a no good person, not worth your time

I mean, why does this bother you? Clearly he left it up to these women as to if they had the babies or not. Did he ever try to convince you to abort? No? Then you have to assume he never tried to convince any of these other women to do it either.

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Judgemental much . We all have a past. Hence the word Past. Get over it or move on

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I’m sure he passed himself around like a piece of meat … Not you’re fault or the women’s fault if your man is a man-whore

I think that’s pretty reckless or fabricated to make you feel some sort of way. People are weird…

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The only thing that would bother me is if he was super proud of his “abortion number”. That’s disgusting. Other than that we all have a passed.

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Y’all are acting like its his fault… First, she said, only 3 ladies kept their kids. That means the rest, didn’t give a damn about what he could’ve wanted… Second… Stop being so judgemental, like my son’s dad had 6 kids all with different mom’s, not that big of a deal…

Idk wth is up with his mind set. For some it’s a coping mechanism to deflect and add humor to something shameful, but that was a lotta potential just flushed, reset, and not truly processed. None of this was ever truly in his WOMB meaning he couldn’t make a final decision, get on birth control before hand, condom use is barely used properly… men can impregnate women daily, but a women needs 7+ months, per pregnancy. Is he an active positive role model?

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  1. He was not passed around…it was his choice.
  2. I thinking you both should have had this conversation a long time ago.
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If a bloke told me this I would run for my life. 14 pregnancies and 3 babies to 3 mothers by the sounds of.

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Its “still” a mans world.

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The body count isn’t what I find disgusting, what I find terrible is that he was never careful. It’s not only the woman’s job to keep herself safe, it’s his job to. All those others could have been prevented. I’m not against abortion because sometimes I feel like depending on the situation and the persons choice it might be the right thing to do. I personally don’t know if I could ever have an abortion. But that’s too many times that he took a risk and that’s disgusting

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Sounds like his a sperm donor I wouldn’t be impressed poor kids

I’m curious if any was miscarriages and a long term relationship ? Everyone has a history! Sometimes things do not work like we would like them too meaning those relationships & flings wasn’t where he was meant to be so of course none of them worked.

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What the actual fuck? Did no one teach him how to wrap the twinkie?

His past has nothing to do with you

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Honestly I’d be more concerned about how he is with the children that are alive and here. Is he a good father to them? Does he see them often? Know the little details about them.

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I would not be ok that he was ok that number of abortions were done and not because he’s like a piece of meat

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My partner has had so many kids! - Mamas Uncut

I once knew someone like that. He spoke badly about the females. The only thing they had in common was HIM! He was the hoe.

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Nope. He’s waited to tell you how irresponsible he is.

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I mean, lot of people have high body counts. The fact that they were responsible and ended the pregnancies possibly knowing it wouldn’t work out or they didn’t want a lifelong thing is astonishing. I would take it as honesty. Now if he’s an ass or shows any red flags, those are the reason to leave, not his past relationships.

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This is hurtful. I suggested speaking with a therapist about how YOU feel and how you can come to grips with it. Only in clarity will you make sound decisions. You and the baby may be much better off without him! But only you can make that decision. :heart:

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So you feel disgusted by his past sexual history? Stop judging him for his own choices. They don’t effect you in any way. All that matters to you is you and your child, not his possible past ones

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Sounds like my 1st ex husband. There are 4 moms but 13-14 kids, he adopted the new wife’s kid from another relationship and if 2 of his babies hadn’t passed and if I hadn’t had 5 miscarriages he’d have about 20 that I know of, I know he cheated on me plenty so it wouldn’t surprise me if he had more

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Alarms going off, I hear them.

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My ex husband has 7 kids. If there were no miscarriage or abortions he would have 10. (I was the first baby mama and we had 2 together) if I had met him later on and found out he had all these kids he was not taking care of my ass would have ran for the hills. Edit to say, I’m only speaking on this due to him not caring for said kids, I could really care less how many partners a person had as long as they were safe sexually. Also, my ex wasn’t safe after leaving me and has hep c which is also a reason why I don’t understand why so many woman want him. Lmfao

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Just because he’s had sex with a lot of other women shouldn’t mean anything to you.

Do you think cereal gets mad that people try different cereal before they stick with the one they like?

Seek some therapy about why you’re so bothered about how many people someone’s had sex with.

At least he’s been honest with you :slightly_smiling_face:

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Is this not a normal question to ask while dating? I would always ask :thinking: then if they lied about it well you know the type of person they are…

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Must mean something for him to remember how much he would’ve had. A grief he’s sharing? As disgusted as you feel he must’ve felt some of that being left behind over and over, maybe he feels “not good enough” for anyone and is surprised you are staying? Or maybe he’s just a player and trying to set a record…who knows

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We all have a past, I think the fact that he was honest with you is great. It’s now up to you to choose what you do with it because he can’t change it. It is what it is.

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Big red flags don’t ignore them I don’t care what the people on here that are saying that it shouldn’t concern you because it should

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I am in a similar situation I am the 4th baby momma and he has been around the block. He has had everyone but the way u have to see it is what made you so special that he quit cheating or sleeping around. Why are you so special that you stopped him dead in his tracks. My guy reminds me everyday how greatful he is to have me and everything I do for him. He tells me how awful he was but I’m the one he wanted to change for. He has adopted my children as his own I had 4 from my previous relationship. Hope this helps cause you are special and you stopped him dead in his tracks.

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My ex has about 20 kids, all different mothers for each child. You’d think one would be embarrassed. It’s quite gross when you think about it. Our daughter is embarrassed and didn’t like it when she was a little girl. Every Christmas she met a new sibling for many, many years. Each time she came home from Christmas with him mad and disappointed because of it. He never had time for her, but he had time to make a football time of children. We were teenage sweethearts almost 30 years ago. He has children of all ages from 26 to infancy right now.

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Ok, that’s his past. Everyone has them including you.

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I’m confident in saying that nobody forced him to engage in unprotected sex. He chose to bed all those women,so he is just as responsible for all those babies as they are. Chances are,he has commitment issues, and the one who you should be upset with is him. I have a relative who refuses to use protection and has 5 kids with 4 different women,all before the age of 40. He doesn’t help support any of them, and it’s disgusting. Stay alert because this seems to be a habit with your boyfriend.

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Im my husbands 4th childs mother. I look at it this way he was young and wild everyone has a past of some sort And the good lord led me to him when he was ready to settle down. I myself would have 4 children had the first 3 survived so who am I to judge. Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn others, or it will all come back against you. Forgive others, and you will be forgiven. Maybe if you see him as disgusting he aint the one for you just sayin

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That would make me feel like he’s a reckless person and I would definitely have questions.

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Run, as fast as you can, don’t look back, just run.

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Why didn’t you think about this before reproducing with him in the first place? It’s too late to worry now.

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Umm it sounds like he needs to wrap it up

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I firmly believe someone who has been around knows what’s available and can choose what they want from a place where other partners hold no more mystery.

You could have told me the same thing about your partner in a positive way, as my husband does of me.

Wow only 3 that’s really sad I’m sorry

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Mmmm, I agree with another comment saying we all have a past because we all definitely do have a past. I used to be such a different person before I started dating my now boyfriend of 3 and a half years and he wanted me then and still wants me now. It’s all a matter of how you truly feel about him and if you can accept that he has a past. And I get that many other factors come into play as well. I changed not only for my boyfriend but for myself because honestly if it wasn’t for him, I would probably be down the wrong road right now.

Lots of gymnasts on here bending over backwards to excuse a man’s shitty behavior :grimacing:

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My ex, thankfully we don’t have kids together though, told me he’d slept with over 300 women. Now that’s disgusting

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How long and how far in were you until you found out about that? That answer would make all the difference…

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You are not allowed to hold peoples pasts over their heads… Especially when they trust you enough to share it with you. If he jokes about it, its because hes hiding how much it really means to him… Imagine sharing something so crazy personal with your partner and they shit on you for it?

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I mean it’s not exactly his fault only 3 kept them…and people settle down when they are ready to settle down. So he was a very fertil fool and didn’t wrap his jewel…I mean It happens or you yourself wouldn’t of just had a baby. You can’t hold people’s past (especially before u even existed in their life) against them. People grow up, change, and settle down.if it’s been good for the last 3 years, it’ll probably keep on being fine. :woman_shrugging: I have no clue how many people my husband slept with before me…but I’m not about to ask now :rofl: it was before me, there for it is not my problem :woman_shrugging:

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Ya, enough is enough lol

I’m honestly not seeing an issue? He has a Past. He had sex with his partners and they decided not to keep the babies. It was their choice. And it was in the past

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If they was all in single relationship then fine, but if some are where he’s had 2 at one time pregnant then I’d be running

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I am more concerned that he doesn’t use protection.

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Well you excepted it

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After three years you’re just finding out?

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I’d be more concerned with the fact that he didn’t use protection, and obviously doesn’t see the need too… Then that he was with others… Everyone has a past… Even I left my abusive ex, that I was with from 15-22, and only the 2nd guy I had ever been with…I went… Down a dark path🤷 for a couple years lol before I met my husband… He doesn’t judge me lol

You should have been asking if he was taking care of all 14 of his kids I guess if you wanted a virgin then you should have stated that when you met him

Girlllll its to late to judge him for his past once you have off spring with him too…Your apart of his WHOLE life now Darlin whether you like it or not🙃

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Everyone should post pics maybe y ‘all have same baby daddy- mine was a he whore also - don’t even care no more moved on!

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This is a tough one. What was the context of when he said this? Was it in a sincere way (confiding in you) or was it when he was mad, in a gloating manner/arrogant manner? Also, since he’s gotten so many women pregnant obviously he didn’t use protection which is an obvious health concern for not only him but you. Dealing with accepting his past can be tough but always consider the context of when stuff is bought up.

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He’s disgusting for thinking it is ok because only 3 had mothers who didn’t kill them :cold_sweat::rage: