Maybe you get a job and let him do everything in the house see how he likes it most of the men couldn’t handle it
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Show him what you do, take a day and leave him with the kids all day. Or even a weekend, make him understand that being a stay at home parent is a job in itself especially with your SO also acts like a huge child!
He needs to realize that you work 24/7/365. Your job never ends, no vacation or sick days. I’d say stop doing everything and when he says something just be like well I don’t work. And since I don’t work, that means you have to make your own food, do your own laundry, etc.
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Check into daycare pricing… then say I can get a job and help financially and the kids go to daycare for this XXX amount a week or shush it… don’t get me wrong my kids went to daycare for a long time and I know how costly it can be.
Tell him you’re going to get a job and crunch the numbers showing how much of his money will go to daycare because he keeps being an a hole and degrading you. Then once he sees what he would be spending maybe he will think differently. OR start sending him a bill for what you do. Maid service. Cook services. Those things.
Go to school, take a trade. Prepare yourself and when kids are older and in school full time you make you own money and shut his mouth.
How dare he!
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Then go to work and make 1/2 the house chores his new job lol.
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Tell him you’ve been thinking about going to work and been trying to plan how it would all play out family wise if you did. Make a list of costs; daycare per child, transportation if you don’t have or how much gas it would take if you do, etc… Make a list of how things would go if you both worked and split responsibilities; who would get the kids ready in the morning, who would drop off/pick up from daycare, how household chores shopping and meals would be divided, who would be responsible of what bill, etc… set the lists in front of him and let him see on paper what you going to work would actually mean for him and then y’all think about it. (You can either use this as a wake up call for him or an actual plan for yourself if you ever do decide to go back to work)
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Send him an invoice for how much money he is saving ig you had to pay for childcare, house cleaning, cooked food, etc. I hate when men think that. They deserve to endure a rile reversal and see how they like the job
Leave for while. He’ll either see it & you’ll work it out. Or you’ll have a clear picture of who he is & probably will always be.
I would go back to work and/or leave
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Stop doing his laundry and making his meals. I bet he will change his tune real quick.
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I’m sure he is very aware of what you do or I should say at least has a “generalized” idea… Was you staying at home a mutual agreement? I feel like some make this decision on their own without fully thinking about the drop of 2 incomes to 1 and yes absolutely you are cutting cost of childcare but the finances are still put solely on him maybe that’s what’s causing the nit picking about you “not working” maybe mention to him if he would like to stay home and you go work how that tune will change!
Stop doing everything and see how quickly he notices what’s not done
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My ex husband was the same way, either wake his ass up or leave! I have an amazing fiancé now, 9 years together, he might say he works but he’ll fix his attitude real fast and say “I work, so you can stay at home and deal with ALL the kid stuff” if he works and he makes it where you stay at home to “save” money, then he needs to respect that! My Ex never did, and I’m so grateful I have someone now who would rather I stay home then put OUR kids (mine & ours) in daycare! It’s simple, sadly it’s easier to say it then accept it, but your home for a reason, either he let it go or your kids go to daycare and you work. Then it’s equal and he can’t/shouldn’t say anything!
Hand him a bill for daycare and house keeping.
You enable him to earn Y’ALLS money
I’ve been a SAHM for 19 years, I’d prob knock some teeth out if ANY family degraded my value to this family.
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Two things, 1) do little recordings of things you do lol sounds super corny and a bit childish, but I actually did because I was getting sick and tired of doing it all on my own while he and my daughter sat on the couch and watched me do everything. 2) go on strike girl!! Helpful hint, when he complains about things not being done like usual, tell him you’ve been job hunting and busy 
Girl, I’m all about mutual respect and understanding in relationships. Sometimes it needs an extra push 
Good luck momma!! 
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Sorry to say this but he needs to go he sounds like he doesn’t appreciate you enough you deserve better
I’m sorry you’re going through this, talk to him tell him that your getting a job, but he needs to help you with the childcare bills and help around the house when you guys get home from work, like cook, clean, etc. that way he is going to realize how much you helped being in the house and leaving everything behind to be as stay at home mom.
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Give him a bill for every thing you do… cook, house cleaner, nanny
Don’t do any housework or cook his dinner especially his laundry since he thinks you don’t do anything🙄 If asks show him how to do it himself
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Go to work and have him be stay at home parent…that change up teaches the lessons real quick.
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Do what you are accursed of doing all day, nothing. Continue to do nothing for 3 days. Maybe the conversation will be different by then.
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No more blowies til he straightens up!
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He sounds ungrateful and unappreciative especially if you 2 had an agreement to being a stay at home. Being a parent is a full time job and it sounds like you’re doing a great job. Maybe he us a but jealous that he works outside the house… maybe stop doing all you do for a couple I’d date and let it speak for itself then maybe maybe he will appreciate you more. If it keeps up talk about it. Or maybe get a part time and then watch him change his tune … my best friend went through similar back when he kept complaining like a jerk when they had an agreement so she packed up some stuff and went to stay with her parents who live local of course and let him literally do everything including care for their children and he work. Needless to say after a few days he was begging her to come home and all alpogetic …
Stop doing it all! Take a break, tell him ur on strike and see what he thinks 
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I would probably throw a man like that out the door I am too old to even think about putting up with that kind of stuff
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You are working!!! And you don’t get a day off!! If he wants to lose all his perks of having you stay home then start working outside the home which will mean his lil hot meals every day and shyt will be working outside the home too. Some nerve he has🙄
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Let him take a weekend to himself with his friends, then you take one. Leave him a list from top to bottom what needs to be done. He will still only see a fraction of the puzzle it being only the weekend… No doctor appts, grocery trips etc. But make him a list of what needs to be done. Also tell him to do a load of laundry, and the dishes. Explain everything in detail. Maybe if you’re feeling extra fiesty make him a meal plan for the kids and leave out some stuff so he has to take them to the store.
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By not doing it. Not counting kid stuff.
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Stop doing everything lol
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Have him take a few days off for vacation. And tell him your going to go out in job app, while he is home. Tell him he is responsible for everything while your gone. Bet after a day his tune is changing.
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Leave for a week. Let him figure life out.
Send him a bill for his part of daycare nanny services house cleaning etc. It ain’t free. And your providing services that hed have to pay half for if you got a job.
Go on strike girlie. Stop doing EVERYTHING
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Don’t do it. Take some days to yourself and see how he likes doing it.
He’d have to say that shit ONE TIME and he wouldn’t get another hot meal when he got home. I wouldn’t do a thing for him anymore. No laundry, no food, no nothing. Obviously, still care for the children.
Leave the kids with him for a day. All day. Leave at 8 come back right before bed. Let him see how hard it is. He brings that up again, leave him and don’t look back.
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He doesn’t know the amount of effort it takes to sustain your home. Nor does he probably know how much child care costs are is my guess…
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Ohhh since you don’t do anything, then stop doing shit 
don’t cook for him, don’t clean, don’t do laundry. Absolutely do not lift a finger, watch how he will shut up quick. AND if that doesn’t change anything, I hate to say it but this shit is never going to work for you. Some men refuse to acknowledge and appreciate what their wife’s do.
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Make up a list of everything you do, find out how much it’d cost him if he had to pay someone. OR, don’t do anything for a couple of days, just take care of the kids, he’ll see.
Lol wow…start charging him for EVERYTHING you do inc laundry,dishes,housework,mom work,wifework…uh huh sis…I’ve been a stay at home mom for 9years rasing my husbs babies as my own (no bio mom in picture) from 2&3 to now 11&12 and though we rarely fight or argue, I’d be damned if he would throw that at me…helltothafuqnah $chac-ching$
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You can’t “make” him think anything if he doesn’t see it then that means he doesn’t appreciate you. Leave. You deserve to be appreciated and respected. Good luck to ya! 
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Oh ive been there before… and i just yell at him like, “this house must just clean itself then and the kids must just feed n clothe themselves, everyone feeds themselves, everyone does their own laundry and folds n packs them away, the groceries do themselves, the bills pay themselves, the kids bath themselves etc etc etc… all you do is go to work and when you finish, that is it😒 while I’m still going 24/7 with the kids, not getting into bed till late… are you a father on the weekends, that spends time with the kids or do you chip in around the house when you can, NO… NO, because you are in fact a detached father and partner so if you think I’m useless, look in the mirror” sorry i could go on and on and on lol
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Take a solo trip. You deserve it.
Get a job and then let him start helping around the house
Start pricing daycare and looking for a job and stop doing all his stuff🤷♀️ once he sees the cost in both maybe hell change his tune!
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Literally do nothing. Besides of course taking care of the kids. Every thing you do for him even the little things. Stop! Make him realize what you actually do. When he doesn’t have clean underwear to put on, a hot meal when he comes home, has to get up and do something small for himself I bet he learns real quick. Or maybe you can get a part time job you leave when he comes home. He has to care for the children dinner, bedtime, his own laundry etc. It sounds to me it’s a control thing, basically telling you would have nothing without him.
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He can either pay for a chef, maid, and a nanny or have you do it for free…
Stop doing what you do. “Oh you said I don’t do anything” you work 24 hours a day, moms don’t get breaks. You don’t get paid with a paycheck, so what. My husband tried this so I quit doing all the work I did. Then he realized how much I actually do.
Definitely get a job and split all bills split all chores and all children’s needs. What he fails to realize being a sahm is hard work physically and mentally.
You don’t adult interaction often, No 30 min lunch break in peace, don’t get paid for your hard work and the list goes on. Girl rethink this if he doesnt value your effort.
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Or get a job outside of the house. Tell him it’s his responsibility to replace your ‘jobs’ or whatever he wants to call them,.since us stay at home moms don’t work… Lol. Tell him he will need to hire a nanny, someone to shuttle the kids on the days they have appts. Someone to grocery shop (shipt) and deliver. Someone to cook meals unless he does one night and you do the next, someone to clean, launder, and perhaps a yard service. Also tell him that you’re going to sign up for stitch fix bc you won’t have time for clothes shopping once you’re working full time. Funny how men see us pregnant… child birth, cleaning and child rearing 24/7 using our body to host their seed, and then giving our body up for months or more to nurse… YET they see all of this so called ‘freedom’ we have. Men.
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Just stop doing everything, nothing, cooking cleaning washing. Find a job, and let him pay for day care. Make your own money
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Stop doing it and job search for a week 
he will change his tune pretty quickly.
Get a job. The amount you bring in wont equal what he has to pay to have someone come in and nanny or clean, etc.
Let him go a week no cleaning, no laundry, no food cooked, the kids are his when he gets home and ask him if he thinks you do nothing💁♀️ also theres research saying being a mom is more than working 2 full time jobs so honestly if he wants to talk about what each one of you do then theres that. I’d rather go back to work and pay Bill’s than be a stay at home mom! I’ve done both and sahm is literally so much harder
My husband did this once when I was pregnant with our second child.
I quit doing everything except taking care of our oldest & he had to figure it out. While I do appreciate him going to work and financially supporting us, it doesn’t mean he’s more important or above me.
I went on strike. It clicked when he asked if there was any clean underwear for him & I said “only if you washed some”.
The next day it was different and has been different and that was over 2 years ago.
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Sounds like a narcissist… there will be nothing you can say that stops this shithead behavior.
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So stop doing things that benefit him in any way. He will soon find out very QUICKLY that you do more than he does even working. Just tell him “you say I do nothing, so I started to embrace it since it makes no difference to you anyways”. Leave it at that. He will change his tune.
I agree with other people. Do nothing for a day or 2…he will see how much you actually do. Also, do the math…if you got a job, how much of that would actually go towards the bank account after paying for child care. In some cases, it’s not even worth the effort!
Plus, if you work, who’s going to clean and cook?
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Stop doing it, when he runs out of clean underwear and doesn’t have dinner he’ll figure it out, or he’ll be single. When he gets home, leave him with his kids and go for your hour break. Lol
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Omg , hes taking you for granted , take the kids abd leave him for a few days, and see if thats going to change his tune, if not write him alist of things you do for him during the day, and next time he wants to argue give him the list and walk away, men that do this underminding degrading bullcrap dont deserve a good woman, take time for yourself, and just focus on the kids, hes a grown narcissist, he can manage him self
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Why aren’t you working? Was it a mutual choice? It seems you guys need a serious conversation to re-vist the decision that you stay at home. I manage the home and kids and work full time. He manages the cars, house maintenance, lawn, all the building, trip planning, and finances while working full time. Works out pretty good. We both bring in the money and fulfill our “roles”.
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Nothing you say or do will be good enough. Deal with it or leave.
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Being a mom is equivalent to work 2 and a half jobs. If he wants to switch with you to feel it he just needs to shut up
If you choose a working woman, you have to accept that she can’t handle the house full time.
If you choose a housewife who can take care of you and manage the home completely, you need to accept that she doesn’t make money.
If you choose a submissive woman, you must accept that she depends on you.
If you choose to be with a brave woman, you must accept that she is tough and has thoughts of her own.
If you choose a beautiful woman, you have to
accept expenses too.
If you choose to be with a great woman, you must accept that she is tough and firm.
No woman is perfect.
A woman has her own ′′ good thing ′′ that defines who she is and makes her unique.
- Unknown
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I’m sorry (NOT REALLY)…BUT YOU DO f#@%^&* WORK. You just don’t get paid for it. This is going to sound like I’m joking…BUT I’M NOT. STOP. EVERYTHING. I’m serious. Once you do that…GIRL ,he will realize just how much that you do, do. THEN HE’LL HAVE TO STFU.
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You are working just because you aren’t bring in income doesn’t mean you aren’t doing anything. Being a sahm is one of the hardest but rewarding things I have done
Go and get a nighttime job so that way there is not dinner , sex or anything and on top of that he has to get home to take care of the children , help them with homework and all that fun stuff. See how fast he is going to change his mind
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I work part time 30 hours… I do my dishes my laundry etc. I shove his clothes in ckoset… his dishes go in his side of sink… he has to pay half daycare and I keep money I make for Bill’s and a little joy or sanity.
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Oh man. He needs to step into your shoes for a solid week and see if his attitude changes. Being at home is 100%%% a full time job!!! The fact that so many men can’t wrap their heads around this is infuriating
Some of my friends chose to have kids so they don’t have to work. True story. But every family’s situation is different
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Throw it in his face that he doesn’t keep up with the house chores for taking care of your guises kids and remind him that you could just lay around and do nothing but keep your kids purely just a live all day and make him come home and clean the house:woman_shrugging:t2: maybe you could offer him to be a stay at home dad That is if he is even capable of taking on your mother leav that is if he is even capable of taking on your job:rofl: tell him you’ll go work and he can “ stay at home and do nothing” No but for real I would tell him that he needs to stop being emotionally abusive towards you or you’ll find someone who can appreciate you more and treat you how you deserve
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Dont do anything! Dont do his clothes, dont cook him meals, did nt clean the house for a couple of days, dont do a damn thing. Only feed the kids and leave the mess there. Let him come home to a messy house, to no meal, to no clean clothes etc. And when he asks why is this like this or what the hell did u do all day, say absolutely nothing like u say I do. Be just as petty as him. Tell him he can pay for a daycare, a maid, and food service! See what he says about that. And then tell him u will find a job. He wont like it one bit cuz ge would have to fork out more money
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Simple… Stop doing it and remind him that you don’t do anything when he asks why things aren’t done
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Suggest you go to work and he stay home and take care of 2 kids all day with no break and a whole house not to mention every task that comes along with that. Bet he will turn it down real
quick lol
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Resentment is tough. He likely knows what you do is valuable, but resents that he has to get up and go to work every day. He needs to figure out a way to confront his resentment.
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Stop doing it. He’ll realize what you do for him and your family.
Stop the hot meals and the perfect house for a few days, then leave for a weekend and let him take care of things and the kids
Even if he wanted her help financially, he needs to speak up. My husband did at one point, and thats what happened.
Her husband needs to also understand that once she works. He will need to help with the daycare bill.
As of now, my husband understands why me staying home cuts back on a major expense.
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Stop doing what u do for a couple days, so he can see exactly how much unpaid work you do.
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My EX husband was like this… And trust me he will never stop!
Everything had a place and everything had to be perfect! If it wasn’t i got yelled at and called names…and i worked 3 jobs( laundry matt attendant, bartender and i cleaned my bosses house 3 times a week) ! He worked one job.
Men have no idea how stressful it can be to be a sahm.
Tell him ok I’ll get a job and he can pay the outrageous prices for daycare/babysitter! 🤷 its not cheap! Stop catering to his every need and let him do it himself and he’ll realize how much you actually do
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You need a man like my who understands it is a job staying home with the kids and if we could get paid for it it would be a high paying job bc we clean take care of kids laundry the bills we make their plates lay out clothes we do everything for them and some maybe yall don’t but either way its a job for us sahm. My man doesn’t want me to work he knows it makes me happy staying home. Dont do anything for a week and see how he feels then
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Yes,be independen and tell him that everything going to 50/50 one wk you do all the cooking and pick up children from school or day care center but the next wk he will do the same,I guaranty you he will stop the bullying,!
they can even change a diaper:laughing:
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You do work… House chores and taken care of kids
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Literally don’t do a damn thing except feed your children
Don’t clean up after them or your husband
Don’t do his laundry or cook him any meals.
And if he makes a big deal about it
Tell him to go look up how much it costs for a maid,a chef , a care giver for the children ect
And then if he still doesn’t see that you have a full time job that never stops
I’d find a new husband
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Stop doing it all for a week.
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Get a side hustle. I sell Yonique. Small investment but you can make money from it easy and score free high end makeup. You can do fun videos on facebook. Plus you can do it at home. Check out my page if your interested.
Sit down and make up a list of extra expenses that would come along once you start working, as well as a list of shared chores/drop offs/pickups/meal planning/shopping/planning family events etc. That would also come when you find a job and start “helping” out. But honestly, kill him with kindness and brutal honesty. It’s possible ( and by possible I mean very likely as men don’t tend to think in long term effects in these matters) that he’s being over whelmed and doesn’t realize how much more overwhelmed he would be if you were to start working. Also be open about discussing the likelihood of you continuing to stay with him should you get a job and he not pull his weight with the kids and chores. 
honesty is the best policy.
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Tell him child care for 2 children is $1500, you work your fair share.
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I feel you on this one. And my method of saying how tired I am. And how all he does it work and I do everything else has not worked…
My husband gets slapped right across the face when he does this. And he’s done it a few times. Fuck that. I work my ass off and I can make my own money if I want. He wants to be like that then deuces!
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Girl stop doing it all and next time he’s off leave him with the kids and house take you a couple day vacation and if he doesn’t appreciate it then it’s time For you to learn a trade or get that degree and get that bread
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My husband of now 25yrs had said this once to me after 7yrs of me staying home raising our 6 kids. I stopped tending to the house, did not not cook for him. He threw tantrums about everything. I asked him to take back what he said, he did as well apologized not realizing that comment was hurtful to me. But before I continued to do my role again, I had him get to house back to par. Ironically he took 3 days off his job to get it done.
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DONT do shit for him . Let him eat his words
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Sorry girl… know how that feels. Just know your doing your best for your kids, screw his opinion…
How old are the 2 kids?
that’s abuse and imo it’s a dealbreaker. he’s exercising a sense of control over you and that’s dangerous.
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Don’t do a single thing except keep the kids alive and then see what he says
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Sounds like an ass sorry but I’m a single mom of 4 now I have stayed home with my kids and I have worked. Staying home is far more work mentally, emotionally and physically than working in my opinion. Relationships and raising should be a team effort him never lifting a finger because he works doesn’t sound to fair. Sounds little abusive as well I hope it doesn’t go any further. I left my baby dad that would say things like this way happier lol
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This woman needs a job