It’s pretty obvious not many of yall pay for childcare on here, do yall have kids under 50?
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In my opinion…that was God’s way of protecting your son from her. To me, the fact she would want repayment for a child’s meal is a red flag. Someone who truly cared for the child wouldn’t act like that.
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No, you’re not. If she’s going to splurge when she has your child she needs to either make arrangements with you BEFORE the day of OR pay for his meal like she should be doing anyways. You’re not responsible to pay for fast food when meals are provided with the pay amount. As for me, after this issue, I wouldn’t feel like my child would be safe there anymore… especially since she flipped on you. How old is the child? Old enough to know of unfair behavior/abuse/able to tell you of abuse? Either way, my kid wouldn’t go back.
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Why would she pay for you’re sons meals on anydays?That makes no sense…
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How many dollars worth can your son really eat? $5? $10? I would’ve just paid the lady
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Just pay it this time and next time tell her to let you know and if you don’t want to pay for him to go eat make other arrangements
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Tell me your broke without telling me you’re broke
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$40 for 5 hrs . Shes getting ripped off . And you want her to include food . What planet do you live on
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Now…I might be ignorant in this cause I have never paid a babysitter but…here in California babysitters go by the hour…and it’s usually like 20-25 an hour and if they are in their home they MAY provide food but if they are in your home they MAY cook so…I would say you’re getting a steal! Pay the food.
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You’re the problem if you think you’re paying her enough? $40??? Tf she supposed to do with that? Thats not even a proper hourly rate
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That’s the cheapest baby sitter ever. You should have offered to pay for his WHOLE meal as that was a day for her and her child. Which you even said she HAD to bring your child. Honestly if I were you I would have found a different sitter for that day all together. Also you should have seen this coming it’s not just about the Venmo. It’s also about the fact that you pay her 40 a day in which a portion of that goes to food for him so what’s she really left with. Maybe at the end of the day she is struggling finding the time to deal with her own life and would rather not be baby sitting with part time job hours making 120 knowing she has to feed your child etc as well.
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Lmao. That doesn’t even equate to $10/hr. 
8/hr and has to supply the food?? With what money?! Was this agreement before inflation hit an all time high?? You see what food prices increased to right?? So should her wages. Sitter or daycare, at least pay her right.
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It would have been better if she had let you know beforehand but… it could have been just a quick decision to go out that day and… the price you’re paying for child care is amazing. Honestly, I would have paid for their whole meal and not just my kids.
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It’s her son’s birthday you should of sucked it up and kept your son home or given her the money to feed your kid she’s not even making $10 an hour lady no wonder she told you she can’t keep him anymore… It’s not worth her time! sounds like you think she owes you something for some reason when she’s doing you the favor 
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You had a deal going. You would pay way more in a center and you’d have to provide food and snacks. You should have just paid and went on. Now you’re stuck trying to find someone else to do it and it’s not going to be as low cost.
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You are not wrong at all.
Yes yes your wrong to start your paying her crap most decent sitters charge $15 an hour. Your not even paying her $10 a hour and you expect her to pay for your child’s food?!?!?! Are you kidding me!? She’s pretty much watching your child for free at that point!!! That’s ridiculous I’d quit too! The least you could have done is pay for your child’s meal!
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I was payin 20-35/day and that included food, for 8 hours…
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You’re giving her like 8$ an hour. Wow. Give her the $ to feed YOUR kid
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Omg wow your not wrong that’s crazy 
what does a five year old even eat I would watch him no problem 
I mean if ur a stay at home mom anyway $40 buck a day money is money no need to be greedy
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Or send food with your child?
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Good luck finding a new sitter fir only $40 a day!
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I think I would have paid for the meal out. $40/day is cheap. Yes even for 5 hours. You may want to re-negotiate the deal. Offer her more money plus meal money. $50/day plus you provide meals. See what she says. In any case, you need a sitter and it’s going to cost you more.
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Well now you don’t have a sitter so was it worth it? Childcare is way too difficult to find I would not have changed my son’s birthday either
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Everyone screaming $8 an hour some places that’s still close to minimum wage in Ohio our minimum is $9.35
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That’s less than 10 an hr. So yes you should pay her the difference. Guess you should be kinder. Your now out a babysitter and can learn to watch your own kid while you work.
LMAO try a daycare, see how cheap THAT is, at $200 a week
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Meal in the house is different from a meal out and $40 really xx
Yikes!!! You had it good sis 
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Your child probably enjoyed it
You’re not wrong, your sitter is wrong. I’ve sat for children and never asked the parents for extra when the child was in my care they got the same as every other kid.
Wait!!! you pay $40 for 5 hours and she provides food for your child too?
Wow…you should actually be sending your child with snacks and packed lunch. Be greatful.
If I were you, I would have send the money.
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If my daughter is at the sitters, she feeds her. However, I do give her money if they do extra things like go to the nail salon or out to lunch occasionally. I want her to have those experiences and I love that she gets her out of the house during the week. It’s not her fault I have to work a 10 hour shift job. I’d fork over the money, your kid probably had a great time!
Of course you would pay for there food she should have told you in advance so you could have picked him up if you did not want him to go but your getting a good rate . Lucky you can send your child there at 5 my son would of had to of been quiet at home x
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But yes your sons meal was only $10 if that ida paid
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It would have been considerate of her to bring it up ahead of time, but honestly, I would just pay it and then thank her for including my child in their celebration.
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Sounds like you dodged a bullet there.
I wish someone would watch my kids for that! No one here will take less then $75 for 5 hour and that definitely doesn’t include meals… and I don’t think it’s bad for them to ask for that. Times are tough right now. At least she still watched him instead of canceling on you to take her son out! They included your son. Be thankful.
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Haha you are not only wrong but I think you’re askew as well. Anyway, go put your baby on a daycare wait list, you probably shouldn’t waste home care providers time any more.
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$40/5= $8 an hour
Could you afford to feed your kid on $8 an hour? The sitter probably can’t either.
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If she agreed then it is was her responsibility per your agreement idk maybe if she would have approached it different and asked you ahead of time it wouldn’t have been so offensive. Like hey we wanted to go out to eat it’s my kids birthday could you send some money to help pay for your child. $40 even if it is 5 hours isn’t a lot for the what the cost of living is right now and that’s damn good deal to have someone you trust watch your child, idk that it would of been that offensive to now have her not want to watch him over what the cost of a happy meal or what $10? Unless she was asking for more than $20 which for a child idk what they could eat that would warrant that much but I doubt you will find someone else to agree to the arrangement you had and cover food. IMO not so offensive I wouldn’t have paid it just saying
Seriously, you aren’t even paying her minimum wage and you expect her to also provide meals for him and pay for extra outings? That’s ridiculous. She sounds more mature than you are, she did something nice for your child. Just send her the money and stop being petty. Also apologize because you were in the wrong.
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How can you ask someone to feed your kid and pay them nothing?
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That’s crazy…I run an in home daycare and provide the food. If I opted to leave to eat out That’s my own option…if she doesn’t give you the option of it I would leave. I charge the same price for 9 hours
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Wow, you pay her $8 dollars an hour and expect her to change her sons birthday for you? She could have discussed it beforehand but don’t see the issue. She took your son out and included him. Did you get her child a present or a card? Cheap good childcare is like golddust and you should be grateful. You should have sent it.
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He probably would’ve ate $10 worth of food good job losing a solid thing 
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Idk I’m on your side, $40 a day is a lot for one child🤷♀️ y’all should know baby sitters don’t get paid normal working wages, which is why when you watch several children it averages out. How is she supposed to pay a sitter the same amount she makes? You had an agreement for her to provide meals no matter what meal it was, she chose to go out.
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You weren’t wrong, she is💯
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It’s her responsibility!!
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I feel like it should’ve been discussed ahead of time. She should’ve told you it was her child’s birthday and that she wanted to take them out and asked if you’d mind providing money for your child’s meal or mind switching days with you and watching your child the following day. I think if it would’ve been discussed ahead of time it could’ve prevented all of this drama. $40/day may seem like enough for you but look at it from her point of view. That’s $120/week, if she’s only watching your child 3 days a week. If that’s her only income that isn’t much and she may not have been able to afford taking your child out as well but didn’t want to be rude and tell your child they couldn’t go. I would’ve gladly given her the money to pay for my child so they felt included and was able to go.
You seriously think $8 an hr is a sufficient amount of money for someone to babysit and have the audacity to think she should have put off her child’s bday celebration because of your child…I “wouldn’t have the time “ to watch him either…
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I think you are in the wrong. It was their child’s birthday, and you literally only pay her $8 per hour. She should have said something before your kid was left with her, to give you a warning, but you already pay her poorly. You want her to pay for your kids’ food too?
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All she’s asking is you pay for a kids meal, probably 10$, you’re acting stingy if ylu refused to venmo her lol
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I can’t believe how many people that say $40/day isn’t enough Where do y’all live?
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You pay her 8/hr and you actually questioned her request?
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Yes you’re wrong you’re paying her $8 an hour to watch your son, that is absolutely not enough money specially in today’s economy, she was nice enough to even watch him on HER child’s birthday, you’re his mother and with how much you’re paying her you should absolutely be providing your kid with food or money for his food.
Im glad she’s done watching him for you for her own sake it’s not fair to her, good luck finding a childcare that will even charge you anything remotely close to that.
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$40 day ? 5 hours ? That’s isn’t even 10 dollars an hour that’s absolutely ridiculous 
is this a joke 
and then you won’t even pay for your kid to eat at that rate you should 
be providing all meals your definitely taking advantage!
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I’d probably pay it this time if I could since a happy meal is so cheap but I’d make it clear that I can’t be responsible for unexpected treats in the future. I think its way different if she brought it up to you in advance tho
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I think at less than $10 an hour you are lucky to have her and feeding the child too for that. You will find it hard to get another person to do it for that
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Least the sitter was going to get the boy food at the place. I had a sitter take my kids to an appointment for her son and she stopped at McDonald’s and got hin food and my kids nothing so they watched him eat McDonald’s.
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I mean I keep literal toddlers for $30 a day and provide their meals. Seems to me $40 for 5 hours is plenty. Find a new sitter.
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Daycare is way more expensive for tuition with food included you have to pay like 800 a month or more l, so I think you should’ve just gave her a little bit of money for your child to eat.
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I would have just paid it at that point… you aren’t even paying her much to watch him
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Wtf no. Youre lucky she didnt cancel for her kids bday and took yours aswell that day. She sounds offended cause she really was doong u a favor w the prices etc
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$40 AND she is supposed to provide meals for your child ? I think that is just extreme. If I have a sitter I pay her and make sure there is food. I would pay her for my kids meal.
And she could have taken her kid tomorrow ? It was their birthday THAT day. I think it’s very selfish of you to say that.
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I’m curious where in the world do y’all that are saying she is in the wrong live??? My daughter learning center/daycare charges $28 a day! And it’s one of the most expensive daycares around here where I live. I think you are right for refusing. If she agreed to feed your child and take care of him for $40 a day it doesn’t matter WHERE she feeds him, she AGREED to it.
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You’re in the wrong. Sorry.
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Yes you’re wrong you’re paying her $8 an hour to watch your son, that is absolutely not enough money specially in today’s economy, she was nice enough to even watch him on HER child’s birthday, you’re his mother and with how much you’re paying her you should absolutely be providing your kid with food or money for his food.
Im glad she’s done watching him for you for her own sake it’s not fair to her, good luck finding a childcare that will even charge you anything remotely close to that.
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Yeah you’re wrong. It’s her child’s birthday why would she do it the next day just because she won’t have your child.
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$8 an hr isn’t even minimum wage where I live. You should be providing meals for that small amount of pay. You should Venmo her for the meal and any activities she may do with your child outside her home. You barely pay her after you factor in she provides lunch/snacks for your child.
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I think you should have paid the extra out money … either that or she should have told u she couldn’t watch your child that day because she had plans for her kiddos bday . She shouldn’t have to pay for food out w the money shes paid … that costs more than a simple meal at home . Even then whybwiuldnt you want to pay for your child’s meal? Idk I couldn’t be like that
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Wow. So I babysit kiddos. Charge 25 a day and provide all food and if I go out some where with all the kids (like one of mine has a Dr appointment) I end up buying them food. but then again I am also just doing this to help out families that can’t afford 250+ a week for day care
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Send her money. You are wrong.
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You are only paying her 8 dollars an hour I wouldn’t babysit for that and pay for food also I wouldn’t do it would you put yourself in her shoes
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Yeah. That’s not a lot to pay for a babysitter. She included him in something special. I would have sent the money no questions asked and then probably a small gift or something for the birthday. And her providing like the day to day sandwich for lunch is different than an entire meal out. Now. Could she have let you know like the day before? Sure. But that still shouldn’t be a problem.
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You would pay extra at daycare for a field trip…
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$8 an hour and you don’t provide food? Yeah… good luck finding another one
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Holy shit, I get paid $40 per HOUR for babysitting (Australian, so roughly $28/hr USD) and if I take the kids out for an ice-cream the parents usually offer to pay me back (though I generally refuse). That’s just insane, I hope she finds a better job.
She can take her own child out to dinner when she’s not working. That being said, it’s probably fun for your kid to get to participate in these activities. She definitely should ask before the event and having your son attend should be optional.
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You barely pay her anything for watching your son and you can’t pay for your child’s meals? Sure it could have been discussed ahead of time but ma’am you are extremely entitled.
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Do the math… your paying her 8$/hr not even minimum wage… and she is providing you daycare part time which is pretty nice of her! I pay 740-915$ a month whether or my child is there or not! I think she could have planned ahead better but at the end of the day are you really out that much???
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You think $8 hourly is a good rate? And she provides food? You really had an issue sending a lil extra
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Two things here…
No, not wrong in the fact that she should have let you know beforehand, or made plans for a different day.
BUT you are paying her peanuts to watch your kid especially if shes feeding him out of her own pocket. You were lucky. It will be hard to find a sitter at that rate. Most are 20-25/hr and you have to provide milk and snacks. I would have venmoed her the money bc its not like an all the time thing and you had it good.
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For $8/hr, yeah you need to pay for his food
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You are basically taking advantage of her! You pay her very low and also expect food to be included in the money you pay her.
She was in the wrong to not ask you beforehand but you are also wrong for refusing to pay! You will see how good you had it with her when you go to a daycare and pay way more than that a day
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I have a sitter I pay 35 a day to watch my daughter and I provide my child with everything. The sitter usually doesn’t use anything I pack for food etc but if they went out for any reason I would pay for my child to eat. I am also a single mother of three kids and yes money is tight but I’m sure it is also tight for your sitter. She could have canceled because it was her child’s birthday
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Lmao…40$ a day? pay her for the food ffs
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Ok so I’m going to say this 40 dollars for 5 hours to me is reasonable. Tax free money. Do you give her a 1099? If you take them to daycare you get to take it off on taxes but if you have a private sitter normally it’s just money under the table. I chose to have someone to watch my grandson. Personally I would have just gave her the money for his food. Is this a habit that she was doing? I would definitely talk to her
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I’m sorry but the babysitter agreed to that set price so bashing this lady over it isn’t right. It’s a transaction the sitter agreed upon so no I don’t think you’re in the wrong per say. Saying $8 an hour when this is what the sitter agreed upon is not up for debate/argue. Now would I lose a reliable sitter for a few bucks nope wouldn’t do it. I’d send the money and maybe some extra for the child’s birthday.
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Heck no your not wrong. She sounds like a greedy something.
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No ! She is selfish. That is not how you treat family.
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I’m sorry a lot of people are attacking you about the price you pay her. She agreed to the pay. The price is not bad it’s $120 a week. I bet she’s not cpr & first aid certified nor does she teach the child. Now if you put your child in preschool or daycare the price will go drastically higher but they prepare them for school, play & feed them. If you’re low income you could get help in childcare or just enroll your child in headstart or school. I know in my area 5yr Olds are in school. Good luck many people must not realize that your babysitter either agreed with you on price or made the price.
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Telling the babysitter that her kids birthday should be celebrated the following day that’s very petty. All you had to do was say no problem and hand a little extra money over. She didn’t have to bring your child along to her child’s birthday. I would pay her more than 40$ a day that barely worth the time or cost of gas.
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The fact that you said should have waited to take her son out for bday the following day is ridiculous…why would she not celebrate her child’s special day?
As for as paying, you should have or just kept your child home. Which is what you now have to do. It may have not been in her budget, it’s hard times for everyone.
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I’m just dumbfounded that y’all are paying over $20 AN HOUR for a sitter. What are you making an hour??? Real question
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I would be to busy to work for $8 an hour too. With the price of food right now she has that added cost to feed ur kid. It’s ur kid venmo her the money
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Omg you just lost a great deal cause you didn’t want to pay what 10-20 dollars, you make it sound like she does it every week. I would be paying and begging for her to still watch your kid
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Are you saying you pay the babysitter 40 dollars for 5 hours or 40 dollars an hour 
I’m a little confused 
if it’s 40 for 5 hours then you should definitely pay for food. Should be very lucky she looks after your child for that much.
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I think she should have discussed it with your before she went
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$40 is plenty for 5 hours. If she chooses to go out to eat that’s on her extra $ shouldn’t be asked if you. I’m a babysitter myself
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