Wow, you had an incredible deal and just really blew it. We pay $10 an hour and must supply the food and snacks and we have a crazy great deal. Most people here pay $100 a day.
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I guess depending on where you’re from but DANG $40 is NOT enough especially if you’re having her PROVIDE your kid food
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Wow. That is LOW. Yes, you pay for his food. 100%.
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You are not in the wrong at all and you should steer clear of her for sure
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You are sooo on the wrong
You’re paying her $8/hr?
Here it’s $20 plus an hour for a babysitter and minimum wage here is over $14 an hour. So that’s not much money for her to be watching him. She normally feeds him and doesn’t ask for money? And she doesn’t go out and ask you to pay his half all the time? If it’s a one time thing because they went out to a restaurant to eat I don’t think it’s a big deal. And of course she has the right to not watch your child for whatever reason.
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40 dollars a day is not enough. Especially for 5 hrs
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You needed her to babysit your kid. She took him in on her child’s birthday. Someone with payroll job could have taken a day off … but she didn’t leave you hanging. She took your kid. Pay for his meal! When kids go on field trips they bring their own lunch. That is your responsibility. What’s the difference? I’m sure kids meals are not more than ten bucks. I’d quit after too…
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The way groceries are going up so much I’m surprised she hasnt asked you to provide his meals as well the days she watches him. You need to stop having a tantrum and pay for it. Common
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Omg! Yes you are wrong! I pay 100$ for a day and I give them money to go out and eat or have ice cream .
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She could have told u ahead of time regardless!
Yeah she could have said hey I can’t watch your kids on my kids birthday but instead she just asked you to provide for HALF of his meal? & you refused?? That’s terrible… on your end… I don’t blame the sitter. You should probably venmo her what you refused to, and apologize and ask her to please watch your child again. Because you’re not gonna find childcare cheaper than that… this backfired on you big time.
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Jesus christ. In Australia I pay $125 a day for childcare and provide food.
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Yeah I think that’s really weird she didn’t cover that since no one forced her to go while your son was there and she didn’t run it past you first. And $40 a day for five hours really good money for her. Our average area is $60 a day but you can be there 6 AM to 6 PM. I don’t think it was worth losing your sitter over maybe $10 but she sounds petty as well so I would just find someone else
Make me sick how people can take advantage of people. She’s taking care of your child. Even though she’s providing the food, I’d bring some to help feed MY CHILD!
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Is she a professional or a friend? How old is the sitter?
Yup you’re wrong! $40 divided by 5 is $8 an hour and she provides his meals so you’re paying her like $6 an hour. Anytime she can’t watch him because she has plans with her kids is “taking her day off” or taking him with her and you giving her money for his meal and games (if they’re going to kids places like Peter piper, Chuck E. Cheese etc)
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So many rude people on here. The pay is irrelevant, the sitter agreed to that pay so it must have been acceptable to HER. Anyways there was a lack of communication. The sitter should have told her days in advance it’s her son’s birthday and they plan on going out that day. Let her know she can’t afford to pay for his meal so she has the option of keeping her child home that day or sending him with a little extra money to come along. A little communication goes a long way. It’s a bit random in my opinion to just wait until you’re out to eat then send a text saying hey we’re at a restaurant and I can’t afford to pay for your son you need to Venmo me some money… With that being said, I would have sent her enough for my child’s meal and then discussed it with her at pick up to let me know in advance for stuff like that.
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You’re wrong, you should’ve paid for the food. $40 a day ain’t shit 
If I took the kids I nannied out I use the money I got for watching them, if I didn’t wanna use that money we wouldn’t go out but the parents did always give me more money if I took them out to eat, I never asked for it though because I wasn’t being forced to take them out.
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My daughter goes to daycare 5 days a week and I only pay $100 and they provide all meals so I think it’s ridiculous
I wish that was the biggest issue in my life to complain about… you’re paying her $8 an hour. That’s ridiculous. Pay for your child’s food. It’s her child’s BIRTHDAY… and there could be a reason they had to go that specific day.
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That’s crazy . She should not have made you pay for that. She should have told you it’s my daughters birthday today I won’t be able to watch your son , in advance . If she’s taking someone’s kid out and it’s her choice , she should be responsible to pay.
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$40 a day for 5 hours a day is only $8 an hour. That’s not enough. However, she took your child out, so she should be expected to pay.
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You should’ve paid her. Now you have to find another sitter. I would’ve done the same if I was your sitter.
If it’s agreed she would feed him on the wages then she should of asked before hand like a school does for a trip for example “we are planning on going out on (whatever day) for a mea for my sons birthday we are more than happy to take your boy with us then we will require so much extra to cover his meal if not then we require you to find alternative childcare for this day)
So no your not wrong as she shouldn’t ask after incase you haven’t budgeted for it at least if in advance you can budget it in xx
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To answer your question, YES you are wrong. Very wrong. 
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Yep. You are all shades in the wrong!
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Here in California where I live the normal daycare is 35 a day… that’s the normal rate right now. And some are higher. They include food and all of that… I’m sorry but if they only watch him for 5 hours that’s good pay I’m sorry she should pay for him or not take him.
Also daycare times here are mostly 730am-530pm.
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Yeah I think that’s really weird she didn’t cover that since no one forced her to go while your son was there and she didn’t run it past you first. And $40 a day for five hours really good money for her. Our average area is $60 a day but you can be there 6 AM to 6 PM. I don’t think it was worth losing your sitter over maybe $10 but she sounds petty as well so I would just find someone else
Depends. Maybe she had just enough money to pay for her bill/bills and survive off until she gets paid again. Maybe she’s just selfish. Who knows.
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You are ridiculous to think she should be providing the food for your son when u only pay her 40.00 for 5 hours…… I could see if she agreed to that but that’s your child u should be making sure u bring food for him to eat cost of things are high enough that u should of taken that into consideration
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I don’t think anybody can judge you based off of the deal that you made with her with the $40 a day. I feel like the communication could have been better between the both of you. She should have let you know ahead of time that she was going to be taking her son out to eat and ask you to provide the money beforehand. If you really had no idea that she was going to be taking him out to eat, I would probably be a little bit upset myself. Either way I feel like this can be chalked up to a big miscommunication. It’s not really right for you to refuse to give her money for your son’s food, and it’s not really right for her to ask you for food money after the fact if you had no knowledge about it. This is a tough one. Best of luck to you
No. You’re not wrong.
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$40 for 5 hrs and she provides the food, snacks 
now I think shes should have asked you way before the day of Or tell you that she was planning this and would need extra money for him to go or that she needs that day off. 
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Wait, you’re paying this person $8/hour.
It’s their child’s birthday.
And YOU’RE upset???
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Yes you pay for food for that amount of money (which is shit all) you should be sending recess lunch and afternoon tea!
And it was her CHILDS BIRTHDAY, she had every right to take her child out and you should be grateful she didn’t cancel. She probably held out cause she likes the child so much but obviously she’s too busy now cause you’re too much of a pain in the arse.
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Yo. Real talk. It is your responsibility to provide food for your child 
% of the time. If they don’t want to pay me to keep their kids food in my cabinet, then they provide it.
Even if I send my kids out with friends, I give cash to the adult chaperoning so that they aren’t out of pocket if my kid wants a snack. When they are with the grandparents…. That’s the only time I don’t cough up cash for meals… but… that’s family.
Why the hell should feeding your child come out of my paycheck?!!
That’s $8 an hour and honestly that’s not enough for today’s cost of living
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Girl you should have paid her she’s already getting minimal from you and if she doesn’t have other kids to watch to supplement what you pay her she can’t work nowhere else. You’re wrong and now you’re out of a sitter next time just pay and send your kid with their own meals
seriously people…it’s BABYSITTING not someone who’s working to make a living. most babysitters around my area are lucky to get $10 a day!
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$40 for 5hrs is a lot? That’s less that minimum wage per hr….you need her she doesn’t need you. Let her know next give me a heads up but if you choose to do something while watching my child and it will cost more I should have the option prior too. That simple
Yes you’re absolutely 100% wrong here
The only thing she did wrong is not talk to you about it before she took him out. However if your son loves being there and is happy What’s the big deal. If your not happy move on. As far as how much you pay her She is being more than fair to you In my area it can be anywhere from 35 to 40 dollars a day for home care. If you go to a center double it.
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How much is a kids meal at Chili’s? $8? You’re way underpaying your sitter as it is, and you should’ve Venmo’d her to treat your kid to lunch out! WTF?
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Yeah girl your in the wrong
SHE did the right thing by quitting…
I babysit I only charge 2.50 per a hour but after reading some of these comments I’m starting to wonder If I’m being ripped off lol. I feed the kid I provid snacks drinks food and sometimes pull ups honestly you should pay for your childs food I don’t see how that is a big deal when my kids went to a babysitter I paid her 12$ a hour I also provided everything for my kids including food. But I guess each to their own.
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So you want her to not take HER kid out on their birthday because of your kid, and then your not even considerate enough to pay for your kids meal? How do you know their finances to assume she’s okay?
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That’s like being at work and a coworkers food money coming out of your check. Yeah no. I’ve always sent food for my son wherever he’s staying so I KNEW he was being fed. And if it’s her son’s birthday YES she’s allowed. But because she’s being paid so little she probably just wanted you to be decent. 
What if she didn’t feed him because she didn’t have the money?
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Lol you pay her 8$ an hour and you’re mad about paying for his meal …?
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You are essentially paying her $8 an hour. She could have just said she couldn’t watch him the day she had plans to take her son out for his birthday and you would’ve been stuck with him at home while trying to work. How much money would you have lost out on had you not been able to work that day? It is a very entitled attitude that you expect her to change the day to take her son out on his birthday because you needed a babysitter. YES YOU ARE VERY WRONG ON THIS!
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Seriously? You’re lucky you even found her for just 40 bucks.
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Honestly, $40 for 5 hours of work is not even enough! That’s not enough to cover the labor going into caring for your child, let alone meals. And while she may feed him with food she already has at her house, this is a restaurant. If you didn’t want to pay for the meal, you should have made arrangements to pick him up early. Send your kid to a daycare and see how much it will cost you then 
I would definitely not have a problem paying her. I think it was great that she didn’t take the day off but instead invited your child to come with. now that you refused to pay her for your child’s food she is resentful and feels unappreciated. I would quit too.
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We paid $22 a day for 9 hours but my daughter is 9 months and we provided formula baby food clothes diapers wipes all that. She did get fed other food at the in home daycare lady’s discretion but never at my expense. And for all of you saying to pay her more what if op doesnt make more than $10 an hour? For her to work and send said child to daycare shes only making $2 an hour. Please you dont know everyone’s situation try not to judge so harsh. If you can afford to pay outrageous amounts for daycare then go ahead but not everyone can.
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40$ for 5 hrs isn’t shit wtf
I get paid over $ 128 per hour w0rking from home. I never th0ught l’d be able to do it but my colleague makes over $ 22559 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is limitless.
M0re lnf0… https://JobsWorld6.netlify.app
$8 an hour!!! Talk about slave wages. N she feeds YOUR child w her food. Its basically her working for free. What can $8 really buy nowadays??
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You’re 1000% wrong here. Sorry
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How you took to fb with this 8 a hour for minding a child is ridiculously cheap she was a good woman got accepting that and she had every right to.ask towards a meal your son participated in why would you think she dosnt it’s not your average kids meal at mcds is it if she dosnt accept your apology should you give her one good luck finding child care at them costs anywhere else
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When I started back to work when my son was 3 months old, I paid a very close family friend 5$ an hour (I let her choose what she made, also only worked at a 711) and she watched him through to him eating solids and all. I ALWAYS PROVIDED all food and or snacks, unless he was trying to eat some of their snacks I told her it was okay. But I always bought formula for my child for him and to have over there, and all the foods. If she wanted to try different things she offered to buy, I told her it was up to her but I would send her extra money on payday.
Also diapers and wipes and everything else that was needed
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Honestly it seems petty on both sides. But if youre not willing to throw out an extra 5 for your kid…i would feel the same as her. Cheap…
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$8 an hour!!! Wtf? Girl your should be kissing the ground she walks on because that’s ridiculous!
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I mean if she would have asked before hand & not went out got the food then requested to be paid back that’s a little messed up. Hope you find someone new.
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As a daycare provider and a daycare provider who JUST took her daycare out to eat, no. Absolutely not. One guardian gave me money for the child’s meal which i tried to refuse but her asking you for money for something she did is insane.
Yup, you’re paying her $8.00 an hour including food.
Not even minimum wage.
No one I know would be baby sitting for $8.00 per hour and supplying food.
You had a sweet deal. You are a fool.
Good Luck finding another baby sitter.
Cheapskate…
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Find a new sitter! I’m not sure where you’re located, but in my area, but child care is roughly $20-$30 per day and the child care provider usually feeds the kids. Now, it has been a while since I had my kids in daycare, but when I did, I paid $125 a week, for full time care (M-F 7:30ish am until 4:30ish pm). I provided diapers/pull ups and wipes. Breakfast, lunch and snacks were provided by the sitter. If she was taking my child anywhere that had an additional fee, like a movie, swimming, or a field trip with a cost, notice was provided two weeks in advance for parents to cover that fee. I understand you’re probably not using a licensed child care provider, but if your agreement was watching your child and meals for $40/day, then it’s on her if she chooses to take the child out to eat. She very well could have taken her child to dinner for their birthday instead of lunch when she has your child. Besides, your child is 5. What did he eat? A $5.99 kids meal? Give her the $5 and find yourself a new sitter.
If it was an all the time thing I get that… but they wanted to celebrate their child’s birthday so to send A few extra bucks for a special occasion wouldn’t be a big deal to me.
You’re paying her $8/hour…
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Totally wrong, ungrateful and cheap. Why should the babysitter have to work around your schedule for her child’s birthday. Be grateful you have a sitter for that cheap. Now you’re out of a babysitter and see how you will handle it now!?!
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You’re being petty. I would be sending snacks and drinks for private care like that. Would definitely have no issues sending a few dollars for a meal out.
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How much could his food have cost?? You don’t pay her much to begin with.
I’m sorry but your wrong here I pay my own daughter $10/hr to babysit at my house with my food and I feed her, if she was to take them somewhere I would pay for them or if I needed her to take them somewhere I would pay for her
You’re paying her $8 an hour PLUS her own money to feed your kid. So you’re really paying her what, $5 an hour? And then refused to send some more money to feed your kid something extra… and you think you’re already paying her too much? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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Yes. You’re in the wrong.
I think you should have given her the money. She provides the food at home but she did something extra. Why be stingy about it when your son got to do something outside of the house? Even schools say to provide a lunch for field trips etc.
I would pay her a little extra for my kid. But that’s just my opinion.
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I agree that she could have took her son out to celebrate his birthday on a day when she wasn’t babysitting, especially if she didn’t want to spend her money to pay for your son to eat. But if you had a deal with her that she would provide the meals. Why did it matter about where the meal came from? I don’t think your wrong at all.
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I have an in home sitter and she’s here at my home providing food and I pay 10.00 hour of course with prices these days she would ask you for money if you take him to a day care you will be paying 4x what you pay her
8 dollars and hour and you think she should have waited till the next day (not her child’s bday anymore) to go out? And you had a prob paying for his meal? I don’t even know where to begin.
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Tbh when I was a nanny I charged $15 an hour for 1 child and if it was only a 1 time thing where it was her child’s birthday I’m sure you wanted him included.
If it was me I would have paid for it , but tbh I would not make a big deal about it .
ALSO YOU HAVE THE AUDACITY TO SAY SHE SHOULD TAKE HER CHILD OUT ON A DIFFERENT DAY , for his birthday! F outta here !
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Omg $40 a day ain’t anything. She was doing you a favor with that price. You should’ve just Venmo’d the money. Now you will be paying double what you paid her.
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She shouldn’t even had to ask you should of offered to pay! Anyone who watches my kids should be treated like a goddess because it’s always been an under paid job that requires a lot.
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Pay her. Damn. No one wanta to pay enough anywhere anymore. It’s your child. They safe? Happy there? Then pay her one. I ran a day care and the costs ran me to the ground because of ppl like u not wanting to pay a decent amount it’s expensive but it’s your child. Let me ask u how much u spend on make up purses etc? Can’t pay a sitter a better amount geesh
$40 for 5 hours and you expect food to be provided. After providing food and activities, that is a sad little amount to be paying for care for your child. You took your child over there on the sitter’s child’s birthday, You had the cheek to suggest the birthday child in essence move their birthday to accommodate you. The other child deserved a birthday celebration as planned. The sitter had to take your child along so that the other child could have that birthday celebration. In my mind, the hourly wage is too low. For you to even suggest putting off the other child’s birthday celebration because you demanded that your child be watched on that day and that the other child forego that child’s birthday celebration to accommodate you is ridiculous. There is another publication where the writer gives the scenario at issue and asks if they are the AH. I think you can figure out what the initials mean. You very definitely are an AH here. I don’t blame the sitter for firing you. Get off your narcissistic high horse, get yourself some sensitivity training, and have a good long and hard look at how you interact with your child as you search for another sitter.
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Lmao… day care where I live is about $1800 a month 
it like your complaining about giving table scraps to the peasants
Paying her enough? Pfft! You are so fing sadly mistaken. Have fun paying a daycare waaaaaay more.
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For that cost, I’d provide all the food for my kid. That is way low pay for her to be required for so much
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I did home daycare for 35 yrs. Any time I took the child on a field trip I let the parent know ahead of time. My choice I paid. Most of the time the parents offered . I didn’t take any money
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You lost a good deal on a baby sitter cause you refused to pay for your child’s food. She could of straight up refused to watch your kid that day but she included him so you could still work.
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You pay her $8.00 an hour and she provides food, two meals for a five year old. That’s a good $10.00 a day in food. So actually you pay her less than $8.00 wow! Daycare for 5 hours is around $65.00, a day…geez, you are really cheap.
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Im with the people who said you’re only pays $8 an hr to start with and she is using that money to pay for the kids food which is even less then $8 an hr since he’s a kid and prob eats snacks and such frequently.
But on the other hand there could have been better communication. Ahead of time talked about wanting to go out for the bday and if you were willing to pay. If you weren’t she would have had to made other plans
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First of all, you’re getting an amazing rate for 5 hours especially since you’re having her provide the meals/snacks/drinks when he is in her care… have you looked into daycare prices recently?!?! Around my area, it’s more like $100 for that amount of time. If I was her, I would be the one that is offended!!! $40 is barely worth her time and energy and your child eats about a 1/4 of that $40 in snacks and food when he’s with her. I’m sure this isn’t your intention, but you’re coming off as very entitled right now. There is such a shortage of babysitters/daycare providers where I live that mothers aren’t even able to work right now because they can’t find a sitter/daycare. I wouldn’t want to help with your child either anymore if I was being so unappreciated by the parent. 
Just being honest….
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These comments are ridiculous and I’m sorry you are going through this mama:joy: I mean I would have just sent the few dollars but I don’t think you are cheap for what you pay her. I pay $25 per day and he’s there sometimes for 8-10 hours. Do not feel bad!
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You are clearly taking advantage of your sitter, she may have agreed to the process but that doesn’t justify taking advantage of someone and on top of that you expect her to provide your child meals when you’re already not even paying her enough. I can understand why she quit that’s not even minimum wage. Start making some calls around to local childcare facilities and you will find out that most of them would likely charge you between $200 a week maybe even higher so $40 a day is nothing and on top of that you question whether she should also provide food and it doesn’t matter whether it’s at the home or out who she’s celebrating her child’s birthday, the bottom line is it’s not enough. I would have quit too.
You’re absolutely 1000000 % wrong. And now you’ve lost the cheapest childcare you can find any where… And did you seriously suggest they
change THEIR CHILD’S birthday plans to appease you?? Get help for your self absorbed antics.
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Na you’re wrong… even if it was a courtesy for her to take him… at the rate she gets paid which is 8/hr… You expect her to take out 10$ or whatever for ur kids food? I’m sure it wasn’t at a fancy white cloth place that ran u 30$.
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Not even $10 an hour. “I’m paying her enough.”
And she provides his meals while he’s there. She’s doing you a favor!
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