Yes you are wrong. It was her sons birthday who deserved to celebrate his day. You’re lucky she didn’t take that day off. Instead she thought to include your son. Everything is so high priced now $40 a day is a great price.
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$40 for 5 hours 
that’s less than $10 an hour. You should absolutely pay for his meal.
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You’re paying her $8/hr. If you were paying more I could get being upset about paying your half of your sons meal, but seems like she’s doing you more of a favor considering it’s only $40/day.
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Sorry but with all due respect you’re not even paying her enough to begin with.
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Not sure where you’re located but all the daycares around here charge about 40/day and they cover the meals. My last babysitter charged 40/day and it was 10 hour shifts lol and the one before that charged 30/day for 10 hour shifts. You are not in the wrong here. Find a better babysitter. I’d be upset too if my sitter told me to Venmo her money over what she’s already getting paid.
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$40 a day…!? Is this a joke? I charge $15-$17 an hour for babysitting. Pay for YOUR child’s food. Good luck getting another babysitter
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I would of just gave the money. Kids meals are not that expensive. I wouldn’t want the confrontation. Now if I was watching the kid and decided to go out I would of paid for that child. No way would I ask for money but that’s just me.
40 a day isn’t even 10.00 an hour but u pay her enough wow. I wouldn’t hesitate to pay for my child’s food that’s just crazy on your part. Why would you expect her to pay it??
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Babysitters make more than that. Teenage babysitters. $40 for five hours of watching a five-year-old? Are you kidding? That’s terrible money……
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I wouldn’t watch your son either. She is not obligated to pay for your son. The $40 is for her to WATCH your son.
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Yeah you’re definitely wrong. You pay her less than 10 dollars an hour. You need to either provide food for your child while in her care or pay her more.
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You pay her $8 an hour and you expect her to pay for your son’s meals? That’s pretty fucked up 
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She is taking care of your precious cargo. That’s your child. Pay the woman for the meal.
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You pay her $8/h and still expect her to provide meals for your son?!?!
My lord the freaking entitlement is disgusting on a visceral level. You don’t deserve her graciousness.
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Ummm yes. Pay for your child’s meal. 
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I think you should have paid for his lunch.
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NO YOU are NOT WRONG.
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For paying her 40 bucks for 5 hours break it down realize that you’re not paying this woman enough money 40 divided into 5 hours is 8 dollars an hour . Like seriously
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Petty on both sides!
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You aren’t even paying $10 an hour stfu you have it good.
She should of ran it by you first because you could of find another sitter for that day other then that yes you should of paid. Teenagers are making more an hour then what your paying her. If would be hard to find another person willing to work for that little. That’s basically 8 an hour and since she is providing the food it’s more like 5 an hour since food is so high right now.
Did this person really just say they could have celebrated their child’s birthday the next day 
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Yes. At $8 and hour. You should pay for your kids meal out.
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Honey, watching kids is not easy or exactly fun sometimes. You’re lucky she is even taking $40 from you because to me, that’s a smack in the face. Oh, and I bet she still paid for his meal since you didn’t. She couldve just let him sit there with no food while everyone else ate. You, are in fact, rude. I would hope she wouldn’t want to watch you kids anymore.
When my son was 5 (he’s 13 now), I couldn’t have found anyone to care for him for $40 for 5 hours plus the cost of food. Now 8 years later, that’s a ridiculous amount because once you factor in the cost of food, you’re paying her less than minimum wage.
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Yes you should pay. A sandwich or something “included” at home in your payment doesn’t equal out to eat prices. And to think she should wait until the next day when she didn’t have your son is pretty selfish too. You clearly aren’t sending him to a center so he’s going to be included in her daily activities. She shouldn’t have to only sit home with your kid.
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She should of let you in advance for the child’s birthday or something so u could of at least got a birthday gift or something! Myself as a babysitter I would have paid for the child cuz its a birthday or I would have let the mom know it’s a birthday party and ask if they send some money with for food or watever later. I thunk you guys are both in thr wrong. The babysitter should of has better communication and it’s your child so why wouldn’t u want them to eat yummy food and go out and have fun.
You’re literally paying her $8 an hour…that isn’t much
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We shouldn’t assume others can or will feed our children as they do their own. It is expensive to go out these days because those are individual meals where at home, each preparation is for multiple. A few dollars once in awhile is not wrong when your child benifits.
Did she tell you her plans on going out? Did she tell you it was her child’s birthday? This should have been discussed beforehand.
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You are wrong. Checkout the price for a drop in daycare. Also with the price of everything on the rise, most kid meals and a drink are upwards of 10 bucks now. So look at it at this way- you lost your sitter over 10 bucks! Also to expect them not to go out on their child’s birthday- well I’ve said enough.
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$40 damn dollars? What the hell, that’s close to nothing! Why should she have to change her child’s birthday plans on behalf of you?
You obviously have no understanding of how much good child care really costs. Not saying she was right for not running it by you first but 40 dollars for five hours is CHEAP, and you feel like its enough? That would be the food costs for one child where I live per day, and a babysitter runs from 17 to 25 an hour.
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Yeah, you in the wrong here sis. Apologize and see if she will watch him still
Let it go, move on!! She obviously doesn’t care about your son, it’s about the money.
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Okay here’s the deal.
Whether or not she’s paying her enough isn’t the issue. If she agrees to feed your child and CHOSE to eat out while your child was in her care that’s her choice. I don’t think you should be required to pay. I probably would offer just to be nice. But the principal I think is that you shouldn’t have to if it was agreed upon that she provides meals.
I pay $75 a day for both of my kids. I am super fortunate. Some people aren’t in it for a living but rather just side money so I don’t think the original poster needs the backlash about how much she pays
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you only pay her 40 dollars for 5 hours half of that money you give her is for the food she might get for her and your son giver her a bit more money to watch your son if not make food for him so that she doesnt have to spend her own money to feed both her and him. she has all the right to ask for half at least she isnt asking for the whole amount that she get for food. unless you have it in writing that she has to provided the food without getting paid for the food she orders.
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Yes you are wrong…she actually sounds underpaid go check anywhere else and see how much you’ll pay just for 5hrs and yes one thing is covering his meal at her home but going out be thankful and pay it’s a Child’s plate it shouldn’t be much anyway and taking smaller kids out anyway is a struggle in its own
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You pay her $8 an hour. Do you have any idea what child care is? You are in the wrong.
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Yes, you’re wrong. You’re paying $8 an hour and wanting her to pay for food too
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If I take any of the kids I babysit out to eat with my kiddos I pay for them as well! It was my choice to take them ……
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Omgoodness pay for his food it’s not like he’s eating 20 dollars worth
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$8/hr to babysit? What in the what? Why are you paying her below minimum wage?
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Yes, yes you are! $40 for 5hrs is nothing! She’s doing YOU a favor. I don’t know anyone else that would keep your child for $8hr AND supply their food!?
It’s HER child’s BIRTHDAY… she could have not watched him at all that day and left you to find someone else, but out of the goodness of her heart she chose to still keep your child so you could work. Her asking you to only pay half of his food and you throw a hissy fit? Good for her speaking up and telling you she won’t keep him anymore. Sounds like she’s better off 
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First of all, she should have asked first or brought it to your attention before rather than after the fact. Her assuming you have the extra money is the issue. She could have told you the day before “hey, we are going to lunch for so and so’s birthday tomorrow, can you send $10 for your kiddo.” This would have allowed you to decide if you could or could not pay and you could have kept him home or made a different arrangement for that particular day.
And for the people saying “you only pay her $8 an hour…” give me a break! The average in home daycare charges $20-$25 per day! And that’s usually for an 8 hour day. The average cost in my area for an actual daycare for school aged children is $145 per week! That’s 5 days and they are open 10-12 hours each day…
The original poster pays $120 for 3 half days 
and y’all are saying she should be kissing the ground the baby sitter walks on lol. 
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So you pay her $8 dollars an hour and it includes food you getting a deal for daycare. YES you should pay for his meal smh …
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Sooo. She is taking care of your child…PAY THE WOMAN. Sitters are not cheap, especially good ones and it’s not an easy job.
but also, she definitely could have told you that she couldn’t babysit that day or let you know in advance that they would be going out to eat.
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Shit I just went to wawa yesterday to get gum and it was$ 5.69. That’s what going on right now, Wake up ppl.
Wow really complane about her taking your son out because you have to pay Xtra little
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Oh WOW!!! I can NOT believe some one is charging you ONLY $40 for 5 hours!!! I charge $75-100 for 5 hours pending child’s age. You are lucky!!! Yes, you should pay for extra activities & food, especially since they charge so little. You are so blessed to have someone to take care of your child & include him in extra activities.
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Wow 
ya no I wouldn’t watch your child anymore either first offf you’re barely paying her anything for beginners and to be upset about sending her money so she could take your child out to have a good meal? Kids meals are cheap…. What’s the big deal???
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So she’s working for $8 an hour and half of that has to go to your son? Your son is old enough to be in kindergarten. Save her the sanity and put him in school.
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40 bucks for 5 hours…man Venmo some cash and get over it…you are getting an incredible deal on childcare
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Your def wrong. Your child is your responsibility to pay for food unless she offers
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Yes you are wrong. And I fully support her telling you she’s done. You are paying her $8 an hour to watch your child. That’s a hell of a deal. And you already don’t pay for his food. So she’s basically watching him for more like $5 an hour if you were to take away the cost of what she has to spend to feed him each day. It was a special even for her child and she was nice enough to still watch yours that day and all she asked was for you to cover the cost of your child’s food. You’re petty and you’re not gonna find someone to watch your kid and feed him for the price you were paying her… you lost a good thing
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If you are paying someone $8 an hour which is below minimum wage then I would have gladly paid for my sons Food and counted my blessings at the same time to have a babysitter that cheap. Heck probably would have thanked her for taking him and paid for hers too.
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Look, we all know that’s a ridiculously low amount to pay a sitter but their agreement was plus meals……did the sitter ever say…. Plus meals less we go out? You also need to ask permission to see if it’s ok with someone that you are taking their child out to eat, if they can charge them for that meal, or just tell them before hand you plan to take the kids out to eat and ask if they can help pay for the meal. She can ask if you can pay but she can’t demand it since that wasn’t part of the agreement.
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Your a jackass 
So she should have no life?
Your son as well?
PAY!
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Nope not wrong. Move on if she wants to be petty
I make $18 a DAY for a 9 hour day.
It’s all about where you are. Rural areas you don’t pay as much for sitters
Our day cares here are only like $25 a day.
Also, I always pay for her food if we go out to eat. It’s my choice to go out while I have her
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I’d be paying for both their meals. Good lord. Send her or leave her $ to “entertain and feed” them. The least you could do. Geez
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I don’t think you realize how much sitters get an hour especially when it’s in their home. You’re not even paying $10 an hour and he has the use of their home and they feed him. I don’t know where you live but in Massachusetts in-home sitters get allotment money toy money and a little for the use of their home plus fix things in the yard so they have a safe play area. I would think my lucky stars in offered to pay half the bill
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You should send her money. you are paying her very little. I would for sure send her.money and perhaps as a peace offering buy her son a birthday gift.
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…you are paying her 8.00/hour to watch your kid. You can afford to give her 10-20 bucks for your kid’s food every now and again. Honestly, I would say you need to tack on aan extra 880-100bucks a week food and gas reimbursement fee on top of the 8.00 and hour.
Grow up.
Prices are inflating at a rate that has not been seen in at least almost 20 YEARS, if not 30 or 40. 8 bucks an hour ain’t covering shit.
It does not cover the gas used to run YOUR kid places.
It does not cover the food YOUR kid eats of hers, even if he IS five.
It does not cover emergency clothes or meds.
It does cover shit anymore.
Either you need to give them a food and gas stipend each week or you need to pay her 10-12 bucks an hour.
Holy I cant believe she would babysit for that chest unless it’s a super close relative or friend. That’s below minimum wage
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U should’ve paid for your kids meal.
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Yeah she should have asked you first, but it was her child’s birthday and she’s still watched your kid, I would not have taken an extra kid on my kids birthday lunch but she chose to. Yes you should pay for your child’s own meal but I would tell her in the future to at least ask first.
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If I was in your babysitters shoes I would of just paid for your sons food. Like you said you did not ask her to take your son out to eat.
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I pay 90 a day for child care for my 5 year old. Food is included but she is a licensed daycare so she gets it back. My other kids it’s 60 a day per child and I provide meals , snacks , and drinks
You sound very cheap. Why should the sitter have to provide food on top of the childcare when you aren’t even paying $10 an hour?
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Offer her a $10/day raise- apologize and maybe she’ll still watch him. Sitters are not easy to come by (around me anyways)
She should have let you know before hand though.
All the same- she takes care of your baby- the communication needs to remain open both ways.
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She’s the sitter not a grandma or family member. Why should she be expected to pay for your kids food? You’re totally in the wrong here. You pay her only $40 for the work and also expect her to use her own money to pay for your kids food?? She’s not here to do you favours, she’s hired to work for you. She’s not an aunt or something doing you favours, she’s an employee and you’re ripping her off. So if she took your kid to an amusement park or something would you expect her to pay for it too? Should she cover the cost of groceries and snacks your kid eats when she’s watching your kid at home too?? It doesn’t make sense at all to expect a baby sitter to pay for ANYTHING your child eats or any activities participated in. Nope.
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Jeez, I’m not sure where some of you all are from but if you think $40 for 5 hours is cheap, I’d hate to see your daycare bills. We pay anywhere between $20-$40 for the entire day and for the most part that includes food.
Now, if the sitter needed an extra 20 for the day because they were going out to eat, then yes, just give it to her. However, she should have notified you before hand.
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Just pay for the meal hun. Atleast they included him instead of planning around your child. Just pay it. I’d ask her to inform you next time before hand though.
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Idk… I guess im just too nice…
If i have it i pay it… I baby sit a 3 year old for $75 for 5 days! I still buy her things and her mom doesn’t mind sending me money if i need it for her if she has it. We both understand life is a struggle rn so we work together
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$40 a day for a non infant is STEEEEEEEEP. She’s very well paid. And she shouldn’t expect you to pay for his meal unless it was discussed in advance. Now you shouldn’t have suggested she wait for her own kids birthday tho. Find someone else, she isn’t worth it. (Former Day Care Owner)
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You’re so lucky to pay 40 bucks for 5 hours I wouldn’t complain
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You’re paying her $8/hr and you expect her to cover the cost of food for him???
She’s losing out on money babysitting for you.
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10 an hour for a 5 year old lol I would not do that. To little. You SHOULD leave food money. She’s doing YOU the favor
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You’re paying her the BARE minimum geez send the girl 5 bucks for his meal
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Um you are definitely in the wrong. You should have just paid for your son’s food. She doesn’t have to put her life on hold because she watches your child, she could have just told you, hey I have plans and I’m not watching your kid today. But, she still watched him and took him with her out to eat. You should have paid for it.
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If there’s a reason you don’t wanna do it or can’t do it, I’d explain it but honestly if you just don’t wanna lose that extra money or something just think most kids meals cost less than what your paying her for just an hour, I’d pay her unless I was in a bind and couldn’t. Bills, needs, kids needs, etc come first.
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40 is cheap these days BUT that’s what she agreed to, what you can tell her is that Amy additional funds need to be agreed to prior, you did not agree to that meal so it’s not fair to you
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So she watches your kid for 5 hours a day 3 days a week and you pay her $40 per day. That breaks down to $8 per hour and usually she pays for food and this one time she asked you to pay. Maybe I’m missing the logic but your paying her isn’t that “great” given the current food cost, her time, and daily expenses. I have a private baby sitting her I couldn’t imagine paying her that little and I always add extra every now and then as a special thing.
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I think it depends on who she is to you regularly. My sister in law charges me $100 a week, I usually have meals for lunch for him here she can fix but for the most part she will buy things as needed for him or if they go out to eat she will buy, as I would buy for my niece too. It it depends on the situation and relationship you have with the sitter.
I’m sorry but you are wrong
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The whole point people are missing here… is she took your son out to eat without even asking or saying in advance you’d have to pay more. If I was the sitter I wouldn’t even have asked for the money but being she did … as the parent I would have said no problem and sent it. Depending on how you said no…: that’s why she doesn’t want to watch him anymore: you shouldn’t have refused.
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The cheek of you 
You pay her $8 an hour. That’s not even minimum wage - you should at least be paying her $10-12 an hour.
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Of course she quit because you wouldn’t Venmo her. Who wouldn’t? You won the battle, but lost the war.
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You should be providing meals for those criminal wages
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At $40 per day for 5 hours you are only paying her $8 per hour. You should be paying for her lunch too.
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No your not wrong at all I’m this matter
You are paying her double what a daycare gets per child a day!
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pay her… she is honestly helping you out more than you are helping her.
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Pay for the meal
My opinion!
I payed any my sitters family or not 10/hr and I provided food/meals , snacks and toys and all the extra clothes examples
Yes, you’re wrong here, sorry.
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Yes you should paid for your sons meal. Ans she also should have told you ahead of time that she was going out. And you said the deal was she fed him when he was in her care. There is a difference. Going out is way more expensive then eating in. And 40 dollars a day for 5 hours, well you had a good deal.
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You’re paying nearly minimum wage to have someone watch your baby and balk at having to pay to feed your baby too? Gross.
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