My spouse said hurtful things to me

my S/O told me I was “loose” and it made me cry all night last night… I’ve always asked him if he’s satisfied and happy with our sex life, I’ve told him he can be open an honest with me about anything… Long story short I asked him why he was just now telling me this and why has he been lying to me about being “satisfied”… he tells me he didn’t want to hurt my feelings or make me upset and that he thought it would make me not want to have sex anymore… How should I feel about this? my feelings ARE hurt and now I don’t want to have sex

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My spouse said hurtful things to me

Are you loose or is he small.

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Maybe he got a small bird :woman_shrugging:t2:

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Try butt stuff. Or accept he doesn’t like women lol

Sounds like he has a little dick :woman_shrugging:t2:

There are medical reasons this can happen too. If this wasn’t an issue before, it might be a good idea to check into that.

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Tell me you’ve got a small dick without telling me you’ve got a small dick. Girl, I’m sorry. He sucks.

Women get wet and “loose” when aroused. He thinks you’re loose? I think he’s small!

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the real question is are u satisfied? If his manhood isn’t hitting ur spot then it sounds like he’s the problem.

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That is seriously disrespectful and quite frankly disgusting. No one should ever insult their partner’s body, genitals included.

Instead of having an open conversation about your sex life, things you both like and dislike, and the best way to please each other, he has decided to just blame your body for his inability to be satisfied. If he had noticed changes in your body, he could have brought it up a whole different way. Absolutely vile. I’d walk away from someone like that. Your self esteem will suffer if he thinks that’s an acceptable way to “communicate”.

If he’s talking about your vagina being “loose” that’s definitely not possible. The vagina is like a rubber band and is made to stretch especially if you’ve given birth. Overtime the muscles can weaken with aging and multiple child births as well, but it’s not technically loose. It honestly sounds like he has a problem with the size of his penis and is projecting his own securities on you

he’s probably just gay sis.

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Dump his ass, do a few kegels, and go out and find some big dick. Biggest one you can find. Video tape it and send it to him and tell him that’s what an “average” penis size looks like.

Vaginas aren’t loose. Peniss are small :woman_shrugging:t2:

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If you want to get him back… call him “small”… but that won’t help. Look up Kegel exercises. The same muscles that stop your urine stream. THAT will help.

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Clearly he is very uneducated in women’s anatomy :roll_eyes:

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Girl he’s just small.

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Tell him “ Maybe I wouldn’t feel loose if your dick wasn’t the size of an over cooked cocktail weenie”.

“This Is Why Your Partner’s Vagina Feels ‘Loose’ Sometimes” This Is Why Your Partner’s Vagina Feels ‘Loose’ Sometimes

Okay but seriously you told him to be honest…… yeah I mean I’d be hurt too but at the same time there’s ways to fix both your issues but you can’t be mad at him for being honest when you asked for it :joy: I’d be making jokes and going to see a doctor or whatever shit happens life’s to short to get that worked up over it

Maybe he’s just small… so pathetic. As if us women don’t have enough to worry about. Tell him he’s small… see how he likes it. Ffs.

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Play him Short Dick Man. He’ll shut the fuck up real quick. :joy:

Girl he has a small penis

He’s just a teeny weeny eenie weeny shriveled little short dick man.

Most men who say that are insecure

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Exactly why he didn’t wanna tell you! Now, the FAMOUS QUESTION - Is he just small? Or are you actually loose? Because girl that does make a difference. Also, if it’s been a couple months - a year of you having a kid, it’s probably not all the way back to normal yet. Some chicks just are tho at the same time. I’m blessed, but, I think he probably just isn’t that big :pinched_fingers:

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No, baby. This is not a you problem. This is a man with a small D deflecting onto you

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:woman_facepalming:so unless your vaginal muscles are having issues that “loose” usually means you are turned on. You can try kaegals but your husband needs to have more tact. The muscles can break down and weaken over time. Usually with age or having babies. If you are concerned you can ask your dr. There is also pelvic floor therapy. Either he does not understand how the female body works or you have a medical issue.

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Tell him nah your just flaccid

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It’s only “loose” when you’re actually turned on. And it’s not your fault your partner is so closed minded on a woman body.

If it’s tight and hurts even the slightest bit, it’s just because your not “turned on”. But, some of the women like it. It’s each to their own.

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You husband has that small d**k energy and no understanding of how vaginas work

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Sounds like he’s pushing his insecurities on you, if you know what I mean. :woman_shrugging:

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Maybe he is “small”!

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Maybe you’re not loose, maybe he’s just be small :woman_shrugging:

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It’s him not you his penis is too small vaginas can’t be loose you can push out a Whole ass baby and it will snap back sis don’t let him hurt your feelings

Women get “loose” when they are relaxed and ready for intercourse. He should be more worried if it was to tight.

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Does he cum? Do you? That’s the real question? Also women get looser when turned on so maybe he is an uneducated fool who doesn’t know how vaginas work.

Naw. Being open & honest is one thing but that is alittle much for me… I don’t really know how I would react to that because if that’s always been the case, how is that something you would even change?…

Now I feel the sudden urge to ask my fiancé since I popped out 2 kids in the past 3 years :smiling_face_with_tear:

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He is just small girl!!! It’s not you!

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This guy must not know anything about sex and he’s small. Women get “loose” when they become aroused. Even if you do kegels all day every day, it’s still going to get looser when you get aroused. I’d tell him he may want to go back and take Sex Ed. It was explained to my class in the 8th grade.

Ummm… maybe cos he is too small?! Why does this have to be your problem?

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You asked him a fucking question he answered :joy: u asked him to be honest :sweat_smile:

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All these women saying he small lol :joy::joy::joy:

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You should have said maybe your dick is just small!

I’m almost 60.
Gurl… Save your $$$ & Get Out!!!

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you should be thankful he was honest and do workouts for your vagina … maybe he has a smaller pee pee also but i would not recommend telling him that lol there’s nothing he can do about it, i mention it because i want to help your self esteem… theres so many things women can do, without money, to keep our vaginas tight, just like any other muscle in our body

Oh no honey, that baby dick syndrome.

Do men not understand how vaginas work???

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Does he have a small wieNer? Lol

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Lol do men not understand how the vagina works ?!!

He sounds like he’s lazy during sex. Does he put in effort to satisfy you at all? Cause if not then I think we can lead with some more advice from there.

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Um, a vagina is a muscle and “loosens” when you’re turned on. If you’re tight and it hurts you either a) aren’t turned on or b) have a medical condition.

I hate when I hear men say this , it could be that they have a teeny tiny weenie​:tipping_hand_woman::joy:

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It’s him that’s too small…

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The looser a vaginal feels the more aroused and relaxed a woman is. It will contract after climax. Maybe he should try to help you orgasm before intercourse which could make sex more enjoyable for you both.

Listen lady, you’re not and have never been “loose”, his dick is just small and he has issues about it . Full stop. It’s a vagina. They push a baby out and still bounce back to hold a tampon in place just fine.
Don’t you ever listen to that idiot, go find better dick.

Leave him! And work on your pelvic wall. Kegels are your best friend

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Are you “loose” all the time or just some of the time? This is a question that needs an answer. Because vaginas loosen when aroused. So honestly he should consider you being “loose” as a good thing.

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Women are “loose” when aroused and “tight” when not. Tell him to be happy your “loose” and not “tight”

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Maybe your not loose. Maybe he’s small…

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You asked him to be honest

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I am a truly from the bottom of my heart sorry that you’re feeling hurt by that. But it is so frustrating as a woman in her 40s dating again because men are so terrified to be honest about things that they think and feel because so many times in relationships women have said just be honest just tell me this just express yourself just give me your opinion and when they do their chastised they are treated differently and they’re issues from that . I have had to walk away from some great guys because I do not have the ability to play with someone that needs sugar coating. If you do not want a answer do not ask. I in general do not have the ability to be around any person actually that struggles with hearing the truth or differences or answers that they don’t like. The way that I operate as an individual is I say what I mean and I say what needs to be said in the kindest possible way I definitely avoid things if they’re not asked of me and people don’t generally want to know. But if I am asked I will not sugar coat I will say it as nicely as I can but I’m going to say it and a lot of people can’t handle that kind of strong personality and I understand that but at the end of the day this kind of behavior with men is very very damaging as a whole to them in society.

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It has nothing to do with him being small. Damn y’all. He’s just being honest to her. Try different things that satisfy you both.

When aroused they do loosen. But also remember you can’t ask questions you may not want answers too. You can do tons of exercises to help as well. Or maybe he’s just small :woman_shrugging:t2:

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I’d bet money the issue isn’t you at all, but him having an Itty bitty teeny weeny.

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Fuck that. His :eggplant: is probably too small.

Wow! What a heartless thing to say!
Don’t stick around people like that. I pray that you will do what is right for you!
If I was in your shoes, I’d leave, but that’s just me😔 I’m sorry you are going through this!

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I’d tell him you’ve never had any complaints and that maybe it’s not that you’re “loose” but that he lacks “girth”. :tipping_hand_woman:t2:

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You’re supposed to be “loose” when you’re aroused. Idk why m3n choose not to try and understand how the female body works :woman_facepalming:t2:

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As hurtful as it is you did keep asking him and telling him to be completely honest… sounds like he knew it would hurt you and you kept pushing for an answer and then he’s finally said something, have you had a baby at any point? Things do stretch and change as we get older, maybe try kegels and also talk to you partner about different positions you can try… Good luck

Ps also if you have kept asking maybe you have felt something different and a little insecure with it?

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Simply explain to him that a woman’s vagina feels “loose” when she is completely comfortable and turned on by their sexual partner. It’d be a somewhat bad thing if you were tight all the time especially during sex because that would mean he hasn’t done a proper job of getting you turned on.

There’s so much misinformation about the female body I wish guys looked into it more before speaking about it.

Dump him. Move on. Don’t let one apple spoil the whole barrel. He’s just mean!

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I mean you kinda gotta be “loose” for it to be comfortable, being tight means not aroused and wonder what he’s comparing it too, to think you are “loose”.

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Wow, this dudes an idiot. Lol.

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I mean, you asked. He was honest

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Unless you’ve experienced trauma or are going through medical problems like prolapse, he’s simply just trying to hurt you. He’s asinine and doesn’t know how female anatomy works and honestly I’d take this with a grain of salt. Get your ducks in a row. And leave!

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Maybe it’s not you, maybe he just has a small :eggplant: :woman_shrugging:

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Do Kegel exercises. You said you want him to be open and honest.

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he’s probably just small lol a loose and welcoming vagina is a happy one.

The rebuttal to a man saying you are loose, is ALWAYS you’re small.

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Don’t ask if you only want a certain answer

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He’s definitely small not u it’s him

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You asked and he told you.

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It just means he has a small weener.

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At least thats what I would of said. Damn whys your penis so small. O.o

Don’t tell him to tell you then if your just going to get your feelings hurt about it. Alteast he was honest with you. Don’t be mad when you have told him to be honest with you.

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If you asked him to be honest then you should be grateful you got the honesty you asked for. Its not like he said ew I hate that you have freckles or something lol you can do exercises and tighten up down there. Might be a little embarrassing to hear from your partner but wouldn’t you rather be aware and work on the issue.

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It’s still satisfying for him, “loose” or not. So why does it matter? Some people are into that. :woman_shrugging:t2:

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don’t ask questions you don’t want answers to

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*** please research this - you will feel much better *** one major misconception about vaginas — it isn’t possible to permanently stretch them out. Vaginas are elastic, so they’re able to expand and snap back. If you do feel your vagina becoming loose over time, it may be the result of one of two scenarios. If your vagina’s elasticity weakens, it may not be able to retract completely. This can happen to women who’ve had multiple births. Aging can also weaken the vaginal muscles, regardless of child birth.

The strength of vaginal muscles can be increased with the help of Kegel exercises or pelvic floor physical therapy*** and other certain exercises.

Certain positions can help feel tighter.

There are a ton of articles to read on. Tell him to shut it and be more educated and when his dick and balls shrivel up when he old then maybe then you’ll be less interested ;*) just kidding but on a serious note ^ read up on this.

:innocent:

I wouldn’t recommend kegels, they can be harmful if not physically prepared down there… I would start either with a pelvic floor physical therapist or palates. Also you’re not “loose”. Or the best thing is the non invasive or non surgical vaginal rejuvenation.

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If you also agree and feel you may be loose you can do kegels. Buy weighted kegel balls. Exercise those muscles. Either way they say women loosen up when they are aroused. He should take it as a compliment.

That sounds like small peepee energy to me :face_vomiting:

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If you withhold sex from him just because he was honest, it’s going to be like your punishing him for communicating.

Well he was right about how you would feel :woman_shrugging:

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You guys do realize when you are sexually happy as a female you are relaxed down there right? It’s normal for it to feel “loose” when your comfortable with your partner lmfao. It’s not suppose to be death grip tight each time and if you did your research being tight down there is great but it can lead to more injuries on your vaginal walls and also cervical lining. Educate yourself about your bodies ladies

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I’d say well I can do exercises for that but what are you going to do about being tiny, as a matter of fact, maybe it’s you! :woman_shrugging:t3:

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I would of just said yo dik too small

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