My teen asked me to buy her an adult toy: Thoughts?

My 14 year old daughter came to me about wanting… adult toys…and i dont know how to feel about it…she said her best friends mom gave her one and now said she wants one…i said okay…because i didnt want to react…im glad she came to me but at the same time isnt she too young for stuff like this? where do i go from here? do i buy it for her?

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Perhaps you’re getting a bit ahead of yourself. What your daughter has done is open the door to a conversation with you about sex … you don’t have to jump to “should I buy it”. Why not sit down and have an adult conversation with her about sex and what the interest in adult toys is about. What does she think she would learn about by having/using one. Just because a friend’s mother gave the friend one doesn’t mean that all other parents should do likewise. Having a conversation will help you determine whether she is old enough emotionally and even physically to have such a toy. This is a great opportunity for you and your daughter to learn about one another … don’t miss the opportunity by worrying about whether she’s old enough or whether you should buy one for her. Make this a learning opportunity that will allow you and your daughter to make the decision together.

I would be so happy my child came to me. I would talk to her about how to clean them and about sex but I would buy her one. Wanted to explore her own body is not a bad thing and I think if you say no she will just find another way or maybe actually have sex… be proud she came to you and just have an honest conversation

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. My teen asked me to buy her an adult toy: Thoughts?

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:woman_facepalming::woman_facepalming::woman_facepalming::woman_facepalming::woman_facepalming:

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That would be a hard NO

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no no… she’s too young​:pleading_face::sweat_smile:

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I personally would say heck nah

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Either that or she goes and explores and doesn’t come to you again, pick your choice :woman_shrugging:

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I don’t see why not. It kept me from seeking it from guys and saved me a lot of drama and trouble. It’s safer than her having sex.

It can’t get her pregnant nor can It give her an STI… I don’t see a downside

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No ma’am you do not buy it for her

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If you don’t teach her about safe masterbation, she will find another way. Do what you feel is right as her mom.

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I would not be thrilled with the friends mom. Wow.

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Really momma, ya gotta ask…

It’s better to masterbate, rather than have sex that young! Get her the toy. There’s nothing wrong with self exploration and figuring out what you like.

Umm are you insane.noooo wtf

Ummmmm no! And no more friends with that girl!!

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I would rather get my child a toy and practise self love then her running around horny wanting a boy

Sec toys is the gateway to teen pregnancy :sob::sob:

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I’m gonna say yes. Better then sleeping around or getting pregnant. Feel grateful she talked to you

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I think since she’s already asked for it, she’s not gonna change her mind. She will get it from someone else.

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What is this world going to :skull_and_crossbones::skull_and_crossbones: i wouldn’t that’s a hard pass. I think I’d die inside :diamond_shape_with_a_dot_inside:

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From here you go to Spencer’s :joy:. I’d rather mine have that than the real thing. Jus sayin.

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She gonna wanna feel the real thing eventually

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UPDATE: Ok people so I have been informed by a few that I did not read this post correctly, it is worded weird because I was under the impression that a different adult was giving the sex toys to her daughter without the mom knowing ….

No! You should prob turn in her besties mom too as giving a child something like that is a form of GROOMING…

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I would confront the friends mom because that is not okay, she’s WAY too young.

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I would it might stop her from wanting the real thing

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If you know the mum I’d probably have a word with her to see why she thought it was a good idea :see_no_evil: that said, I’d rather my daughter experiment herself at that age rather than decide to have casual sex and all the risks that come with it

I cant even imagine. Omg.

For everyone saying “no” I just want to know why

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I would, she’s just gonna get creative and figure it out on her own without you.

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What in the actual fuck?! More like you need to tell your daughter to reevaluate her friends and just worry about school and her studies. IJS. And if you don’t agree with me just keep scrolling. 

No. However it would be a good time to have a frank discussion about sex and sexuality. Literally st age 14, purchasing an item like that could potentially be considered child abuse, in my opinion.

I wouldn’t trust those kids or the parent

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Here’s a question for you all to ask yourselves… when did you start to get curious, experiment and play? If the answer is anywhere near 14 then maybe she should appreciate that her daughter feels comfortable enough to go to her and ask :woman_shrugging: and go from there

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I would much rather my child trust me and come to me. She is trying to be responsible and safe by coming to you.

This could be the start of her no longer coming to you if she doesn’t feel seen or heard.

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Idk that’s hard because it’s a natural feeling for her to be horny or interested in that everyone is different with different feelings different intensities. I feel you should do whatever you feel and maybe talk with her about it

At least she wants one and isn’t having sex. I see no problem with it.

No lord what a question

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I actually had the masterbation talk with my teen a couple months ago. I told her she could ask me anything (I was dying on the inside haha) and we talked about toys. Because I told her to never stick objects down there blah blah. honestly I rather her ask me for a actual toy then god forbid experiment with stuff.

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How old is this said friend?

Honestly this day n age isn’t how it used to be…I’d Honestly rather her have that then go out for the real D…and she felt safe to ask u…teens r exploring their bodies and well as we as mothers don’t want to hear any of that so young it’s real life… it beats her going out n having sex with chance of getting preg or std

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I would agree she’s too young, but it’s better to get it and teach her about it then her going out and having actual sex. If she’s curious about it and wants it bad enough she’ll find a way to get one with or without you agreeing.

I personally would cause knowing how curious kids can be I don’t want her shoving unsafe things up there

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Oh gosh ! What a situation to be in . I’d talk to her see If she wants one to just be “cool” or if she is truly exploring herself… communication…

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I never comment. But my opinion on this is that I would rather buy my daughter toys. It decreases the chance of her getting pregnant.

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If you don’t she may seek pleasure from the real thing

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Yes probably better for her then going to any boys her age.

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Ask her why she wants it. You know?

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Kids are so creative these days you say no and they will use household items like an electric toothbrush :confounded:

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What in the hell did I just read?

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I feel like maybe late 15 early 16 and only a small bullet. But hey it’s honestly better than her just going to have sex.

If you don’t buy her one, her mind will go elsewhere. And she may find that in a man. If I had a toy when I was 14, I probably wouldn’t have went through the things I went through. My sex drive was extremely high at that age.

At 14 I was still playing with dolls lol and no not adult toy dolls.

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Personally, I would sit down and talk to her about about it all.
But I would rather her being comfortable enough to come to me and ask than try and go behind my back and her not trust me again.

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Not a chance…
If she is feeling that adult she can get a JOB and debit card of her own and purchase whatever the law allows for HERSELF.
My daughter would also not be visiting that house…period.

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I’d buy her a shovel

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My doctor told my mom when I was a teen that it’s better to buy me a vibrator than to keep stuff like that from me. By providing it she’s not going to seek that form of release from boys and under age sex. You will also be teaching her it’s not something to be ashamed of. She’s gonna do it no matter what, you should be proud she felt comfortable enough to ask you.

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All I can say is WOW why are you even asking? No!

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It can’t get you pregnant and there’s nothing wrong with it. If my daughter or son asked for a toy I would get it for them

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I think its up to you…I think it’s worth an honest conversation…I would but after we discussed safe sex and consent

Time to go toy shopping.

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Definitely get her one! Teach her she doesn’t need other people for pleasure or to learn about her own body

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Oh that’s not good. Time to have “THE Talk”.

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There’s not a thing wrong with sex toys, you’d rather your children go explore with a real life peeper? Yeah sounds so adult like to let your kid explore with real penis over a fake penis. Y’all are haters. Act like YOU WISHED you could have gone to your mom instead of making makeshift toys for yourself. Do it. Help your daughter explore. Teach her properly so when she is ready to actually have sex she will know what she likes etc

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At least she asked. She could’ve just taken your card and ordered it online herself

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At that age they are figuring out their bodies so it may help with that and it can help the trust and communication going between you both.

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Now now, would everyone be saying no if they were a boy? I don’t think so.

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Toy better than sex to early.

But im glad she and u have healthy enough relationship, that she’s comfortable with you. That’s a positive sign. Either way kids will do what they want with or without u knowing.

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I’d rather buy my daughter a toy than her use something unsafe.

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I’d say yes. If we’re being honest, she’s going to get one anyway, or she’s going to resort to the real thing. If she’s 14 and feeling those urges it’s better for you, her momma to educate her on safe sex etc, and explain to her the right and wrong things to be doing. If she’s coming to you to ask something like this already, at least know your raising her right and she feels comfortable talking to you. Good luck momma! :two_hearts::two_hearts::two_hearts:

I think it’s absolutely wonderful that she was able to come to you… that says alot and as for the toy that would depend on her maturity level… do what you feel is right…

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Well I don’t know if I would say yes or no but they have the rose toy and it doesn’t enter the vagina. So I would possibly consider that one.

Ok, for all you saying no… hormones always win. Masturbation happens. Wouldn’t you rather them discover themselves before they hook up someone? It’s uncomfortable yes, but this is a great opportunity to discuss being safe and learning about yourself.

ETA: if you make this weird, she’ll never come to you about anything like it again.

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I’m glad she was able to go to you with this. But honestly my 14 year old would ask me for a toy I would say ok let’s go to store pick it out and you gotta check it out. And see if she’s brave enough to do this. Hey you wanna act like an adult and do adult things this is what adults do. Or hey let’s buy matching toys :rofl::crazy_face:.

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I think it’s awesome that she trusts you enough and is comfortable enough to come to you and talk to you about it. Way better than her stealing one or using something else because she is too embarrassed.

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I would do it :woman_shrugging:t2: Teach her that she can do anything for her body and does not need to seek sexual pleasure from a man.

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Nope. That is something my kids if wanted, were told to get as an adult on their own

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I would be confronting this so called parent about giving something like that to my kid, however, I would allow her to have one.

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Rather this than get pregnant. What a bunch of old fashioned responses lol

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Honestly if she curious about it talk to her about it be open the open you are about things less curious they are and she at least expressing on herself and no where else why not she not out having sex she not goin to get pregnant. Try to remember when you was 14 just sayin

I just found my own ways but started MB before I was even 14 she’s a teenager either buy it for her, or she’ll buy it herself or find a boy or a girl to fulfill the needs she’s asking you to buy for her.

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Way to young! But I agree if you don’t she may seek it from somewhere else. Also i Would be talking to
Her best friends mom that is not cool for her to think it’s okay to give someone else kid a sex toy without consulting the mom or dad first .

No.this is ridiculous! Get her away from ht

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Ummmmm ok I have conflicting views on this. First I am a father of 2 teenage girls so I’m not just pouting off. These days girls are exposed to sex way earlier than we were. Media, music, friends, it’s everywhere. She is coming to you which is amazing she trusts you with such private things, but if she wants it she will get it and better with your knowledge and blessing than behind your back.

Hide yours in a lock box cause if she wants one badly enough she’ll steal yours that’s how I lost 2 of mine that way into the garbage they went

I’d rather my kid come to me about anything then go behind my back. Also that age is when they start expemting and exploring themselves if they haven’t already. And idk maybe the toy would help her not wanna do with someone else as much :woman_shrugging:

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I see this as body shaming basically saying “ew don’t touch your self” I’m sorry but I’d never make my child feel that it’s wrong to explore them selves

Come at me idc

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Omg :sob: 14 I hope my daughter never gets to that point .:cry:but it better then her going and getting pregnant

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Id say, No, and explain how those “toys” take away from pleasure and make you desensitized. It becomes harder to climax…just sayin

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Be glad she came to you!!! I never did with my mom because I didn’t feel I could trust her. Get her just a basic vibrator.

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If she is old enough to ask you, then she probably knows her body. But haveing conversations is healthy.

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Safer alternative to sex. I would 100% do that for my daughter when she gets older. And I would be so proud of her for having the balls to talk to me about it, vs. getting one and hiding it.

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I lost my virginity at 14 or 15. I’d rather my daughter experiment with that that the real thing :woman_shrugging:t4:

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Young girls will resort to using brush handles and the like. Or just real peen. Its probably so uncomfortable for you but I’d buy some small,basic kind for her and just leave it under her pillow.

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Have the talk and encourage her that it’s healthy and safe! :sparkling_heart: keeping an open line of communication and transparency is likely to avoid creating sneaky and/or problematic situations down the road!

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I mean do we tell 14 year old boys not to masturbate? Honestly it’s better than them having sex.

Yes I would. Pleasuring yourself is completely normal and starts even younger than 14. I would have the talk with her and purchase small sex toys.