…Don’t take any man into your life, until your children are raised or you are mature enough to choose wisely. No child should ever feel frightened of the adults in their home. Home should always be a safe place.
No man should have to live in a home where he has no say, no rights and no way to defend himself against toddlers, who do lie often.
You have messed up your child’s head and heart by introducing a man into his life and then ripping the man back out of his life. You have basically taught your child that people are disposable. Sad.
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I cannot believe the crazy bs I am reading!!! Kids need discipline! Not abused or beat but a spanking is fine. My kids got spanked and stood in the corner many times. They knew they were loved and cared for and they are grown successful adults. I don’t care who disagrees with me. I believe in manners, respect for others. Lack of discipline is why we have so many entitled brats.
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Wow! I’m sorry, but it’s basically bullcrap that you kicked him out bc he was watching your kid he’s not allowed to discipline… Sounds very one sided… Quick question… What if he did have kids??? Would you allow his kid to be rambunctious and get on your nerves?? No! If I were you and this man is a good man who has NEVER been abusive to you or your kids (your words), I’d talk to him and apologize for jumping the gun. Or move on with your life…
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Always believe your child.
However if someone cant discipline them, then dont have them watching them.
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If someone I was dating ever told me that I would not discipline their child ever, I would find the door myself and never look back.
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Shouldnt there be a mark on the child if he was popped? When my.girls are fighting and start tattling on each other I always can tell who hit who by the Marks their hands leave. I would think there would definitely be a hand print if he popped him
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Thats the tip of the iceberg hes gonna start abusing him how can you be a grown man and hit a defenseless 2 y.o.
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I’m with you girl. My kids come first always and forever…
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If you are going to be in a relationship with kids then it’s only right that your partner has the right to discipline as well. You sit down like adults and discuss how you are going to discipline the children. Also it teaches your children respect. Would you pull your child out of school because the teacher disciplined them. Think about it
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I agree with you too many babies dying at the hands of boyfriend’s who the mother let have too much control.you can get another man but your babies are irreplaceable
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It’s literally written in EVERY Child Development book that kids lie, especially toddlers 
Not sure if this is your first child or not but you have a VERY long road ahead of you if you ALWAYS believe your children…
Expecting a man to “play daddy” for your child, live in the same house, provide, etc. and not discipline him when needed is completely ridiculous.
I don’t know if he got smacked or not, but it sounds like this was just an excuse to kick the man out your life. It’s better you not waste your time or his, “playing house” with each other…
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You did the right thing you have to protect your son he comes first.
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Look I’ve been a single parent of 4 children for 25 yrs. Lived by ourselves. I NEVER gave Anyone the chance to Touch my kids for any reason. Always listen to your kids. Life is too short. To add in my 25 ye old is a coast guardsman my middle boy a lineman and my 19 a marine and my 13yr old girl. I disciplined my children never any reason for someone else to.
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I commend you for doing what you did. Very few women would take actions like you did. You reacted as a MOMMY before as a man’s lady.
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First of all it’s a pop. Did he have a bruise no. He probably didn’t even think about it. A child should be discipline.
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Steve Wilko, get a lie test on your bf.
Bc u could save another child, by not being abused.
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Was there bruising or a mark to show he did it? And also how do u expect someone to watch your child and have 0 rights to discipline? It is all situational and obviously depends on ur definition of discipline but if a kid gets outta hand then what do u expect someone to do allow it? I mean at least give him something he could use as discipline…No one should ever “smack” your kid no. So dont take my wording wrong. But I would find out every detail before deciding.
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I understand how you feel because of so many stories today about adults harming children… Idk who but someone isn’t telling the truth, and if it’s your bf it’s because you told him not to discipline. You’ve been with him 2 years and living with him, so is he not taking on a daddy role? Just talk it over maybe he’ll feel comfortable telling the truth 
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Just saying from a step parent point of view. I have three step kids that are now adults. I have been in their lives since they were 4,5 and 7. And their mom eventually left their lives. And my husband worked more than I did. I basically raised them and as they got older I was put in the position to be the main disciplinary parent. Of course they didn’t like it. We butted heads bad and my husband finally said that I wasn’t allowed to discipline he would do it. He never followed through and always felt sorry for them and gave in. He know saw how self untitled it made them and how they thought whatever they wanted they would get and they didn’t have to work for it. Now when they come to visit/stay in our house there’s not really a need to discipline but it’s basically our house our rules and if you don’t like it the. You can find another place to stay. Just know that as they get older if you don’t not establish that they are to listen and to respect all adult authority figures they will walk all over them.
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Smacking a child anywhere but the butt is abuse. I dont care what anyone else tell me. You did the right thing.
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I don’t know, I would not like anyone putting his hands on my toddler or kid if any age. However, as a mother I would have asked the 2 year long BF what happened and why he felt that form of discipline was necessary. I find it tough to understand, because it is a 2 year relationship which means a huge time of the toddlers life. Him not allowing to discipline the child, while he is the one taking care of child so mom can rest, is a bit confusing. If he’s the adult caring for the child, he should be allowed to discipline him, but not physically. There are other forms of discipline that work.
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If you’re gonna date a man and have him living with you you need to re adjust your thinking on this one! If hes gonna be looking after your child anytime he should be allowed to discipline your child. Maybe have some ground rules on what kind of discipline is ok and what’s not. After all we all discipline in our own way. And honestly a smack or swat is not the worst thing. Sometimes time out just simply isn’t enough
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It’s better to be safe then sorry it’s your child and if you felt he hurt your child in any kinda of way I would expect no less then the momma bear mode you were in now I have no clue if he smacked your child or not but I personally would believe my son always go with your gut don’t 2nd guess yourself
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I think you did the right thing! You never know! With all the stories out her your kid comes first plus usually little ones don’t lie! You just probably saved your child’s life God bless you sweet mama!
You acted very rash! My Goodness! I think he is probably better off if he is expected to be a caretaker for your child but can’t discipline him. You didnt even try to get the entire story from him. This could have been a learning experience for all of you, and instead you kicked the guy out over a potential smack on the leg? You obviously arent ready for a blended family the relationship.
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As I was abused myself and my daughter only knows her stepfather as dad now. But when I dating I wanted a teammate through life. Thank goodness I allowed my now husband to discipline my kids along side me. I never would’ve dated if I wasn’t going to allow my partner to be just that, my partner in all things. Seems like your child loves him and kids can use terms that mislead. My kids said their siblings choked them, turns out they grabbed the back of they’re neck is all. But they didn’t know what words to use.
You did the right thing i have my husband of 7 years who raised our daughters had one of them told me that i would have told him to leave as well but never thanks God my girls are very happy with they step dad trust me you did the right thing
I’m a single dad. If my gf is watching my daughter and she’s not behaving she has full permission to discipline her. If I trust her enough to take care of my daughter that includes discipline. We haven’t had to cross that bridge yet but she knows where I stand on it. If you’re gonna be in something kids need to know it’s a united effort between the two parent figures otherwise they’re going to run over the lesser “authority”. Yes there are a lot of news reports about people abusing children but you should also think about the untold stories of men and women stepping up and raising children that aren’t theirs and those people being better parents than the ones that should have been there.
Sometimes kids lie my daughter told people my bf beats her then eventually said i beat her everyone we live with beats her come to find out her father she went around at the time was teaching her to say that plus make her believe she was actually being abused my bf disciplines her not physically just takes stuff away from her or throws out one of her toys if she keeps doing the same thing over and over again he or i have repeatability asked her not to do
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If you’re not comfortable with someone you’re in a relationship with disciplining your child there, has to a reason behind it. And one reason may be trusting the abilityof another individual to administer correct discipline, without going overboard. You do have to believe your child but, there are times when you have to use parental discretion and wisdom, to know that your child may not always be truthful! And secondly, if this is a discussion that you all had, he accepted those terms going into the relationship, then he should have respected you and awakened you if necessary si, you could have handled the situation. If you don’t trust someone enough to discipline you child then you really, shouldn’t enter into a relationship with them period! You have to set boundaries for children otherwise, they will be wild, direspectful and no sense of self-control! Discipline shouldn’t be off the table, and you must figure out a way to incorporate it into your son’s life, or you do him a disservice as a parent!
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Take a deep breath and think! Only you know the answer. It doesn’t sound like this is a bad guy but I totally get protecting your baby. Ignore the comments that are negative. This is your life. In my experience kids lie. It’s happened to me before. Do you want to throw away your relationship if he isn’t guilty? I don’t think your son would be upset he was leaving if he were cruel to him. Listen to your heart and good luck to you lady 
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It seems like you did not give any time to even process this situation. You have been with this person for 2 years, I feel like there should be trust there, especially if this is 1st time happening. What I dont understand is why do you have him watching your child if you dont want him to decipline your child? You need to take care of your son your self then! It’s not fair to your boyfriend, I dont know your whole story, but from what you say, i think you did over react. I would understand if this person was new or fairly new. Dont you guys live together? Like dang girl so fast to put him out, the way you describe your kids behavior is that hes an ass hole sometimes…well mine are too and they need spank on the booty sometime. If you want to salvage your relationship then you two need to sit down and talk about boundries and he needs to tell you when he is too frustrated with your kid to prevent any of this.
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My husband has been in my sons life since he was 4 and he will be 13 soon. He has NEVER put his hands on him but he does ground him and discipline him. I’d let things cool off. 2 years and this is the first claim of this?
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Did he smack as punishment or abuse?
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Don’t bring people around your kids that you haven’t established enough trust with them that you could allow them to properly discipline your child. Children don’t need instability of random people in their lives. Don’t leave your children alone with someone that cannot discipline them, either.
How is he supposed to be an equal part in your life if he can equally parent your child? And two years is a long time to be with someone and not let them discipline the child. Also to kick him out at first sign of remote doubt, was there a mark? Was the child crying or just pouting? It seems unfair to child to remove a large portion of their life, also unfair to “boyfriend” to exclude him from part of the parenting but to expect him to watch the child. I think boyfriend is better off.
I have 4 children never went through this before, but I can tell you if I didn’t want someone disciplining my child I wouldn’t ask them to watch them .
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He wouldn’t be my boyfriend and would be lucky to walk away on his own 2 feet.
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ALWAYS BELIEVE YOUR CHILD! Fuck no I don’t care if I dated another dude for 5 years, if you and him have not had the talk abt disciplining your child then leave him. When my son comes if I ever leave my baby daddy and I’m in a relationship with a guy that is not the father of my child, we would HAVE to have that talk. My parents didn’t believe me when I told them stuff that happened to me because I was “young” but BELIEVE your child and don’t care what anybody says abt that!
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My grandson was 2 at the time almost 3, would claim i hit him and my hand to God, I NEVER LAID A HAND ON HIM, so yes they can and do lie
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The discipline has to be discussed up front. Kids can lie for various reasons but if you don’t know what truly happened, sending him packing is right. It also sends the message to your kids that abuse is not ever tolerated.
Not gonna lie. And I’m gonna be totally honest. If you except someone to stick around long term who is not the father of your child,they should have rights to disciplining your child but with in reason and circumstances
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Take your kid and run. For a 2 year old to say that. You have to believe your child. Take your kid and run!
I don’t think your baby is lying but I also believe your bf should be aloud to discipline your child considering you long history together sooo…
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Some of this is crazy, yes you should always believe your child nd defend them but first off all three of you should have sit down nd talked about what was said nd what happened, the truth would have come out from either your bf or your child, second, if a man is with you in a committed relationship nd lives with you nd your children nd was taking care of them while you was sick nd being a “father figure” he should discipline them, he should have the right time spank them nd to teach them right from wrong, you’re entire relationship sounds like you didn’t want it you jus don’t want to be alone or maybe needed the financial support, if you trust someone to live with you nd watch your kids you have to trust them to correct mistakes nd teach which unfortunately for you involved discipline… You went was to far with the whole thing, nd I’m sure if you sit in a circle with him nd your toddler which ever one lied would have eventually broke down the truth…
I have a 3 year old who said his brothers hit him and they weren’t home at the time you have to watch kid’s at that age they say stuff they believed happened
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If you two have been living together for 2yrs then I would think that you trusted him with your child. I know I would never let someone live in the same home with my child if I wasn’t 100%sure of that person. And he probably did pop him on the leg and your child probably deserved it. There’s nothing wrong with discipline. It’s wrong not to discipline a child. You have to teach them right from wrong that’s part of being a parent. What happens when he’s in school and doesn’t mind?
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You are the parent,do not allow ANYONE TO TOUCH YOUR KIDS,YOU DID THE RIGHT THING,
If were dating no you didn’t adopt him or his father. Plus it depends on how long the relationship has been going on too. He felt maybe he could’ve but there needs to be a sit down talk even if you guys don’t get back together.
Our granddaughter told her mom that poppa popped her butt. When in reality he just said if she didn’t behave that he would pop her butt. So a lot of times they repeat what was said and don’t distinguish the words from action. She is three
Always err on the side of protecting your child. They only have you to protect them. If you believe the boyfriend over your child, it sends a message to your child that you don’t believe him and in the future might not confide in you
In any situation always believe your child. It’s normal for him to get upset about your boyfriend leaving, he was use to having him around that doesn’t mean that he lied about your bf hitting him.
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If he’s your man, living with you, taking care of your child, then he has a right to discipline, to an extent. You can’t have it both ways. So no, you absolutely did not do the right thing
Was there a mark on his leg where he said he got hit
I don’t hit my child and he still gets disciplined,if you even threatening to hit my kid you’re out .you made the right decision mom. Eff that guy 
I’d ask in a few days what happened again to both the child and the adult. See who was lying?
What ever happened to “it takes a villiage” when i was growing up all the neighbors would snatch us up and take us home to get snatched up again. This dude lived with you, played daddy and hes gone over a non mark leaving supposed pop on the leg? Hmmm…
God give me strength…it is parents like you that keeps breeding monsters and just throw them at us and expect for ppl to just accept them as they are.
U need fixing then you’ll understand what’s really going on around u.
…I’ve said it…
He didn’t just come out with this for nothing so believe him .
Thats the beauty of kids they are so loyal even after being hit by someone they are familiar with…you did the right thing by throwing his ass out especially after establishing that he does not discipline your kids…he failed you and for that you did the right thing 
You been in a relationship 2 years not 2 months. How old is your kid? 3-4 boyfriend been there majority of your kids life
I never let any guy put his hands on my kids either. If they did, they were out too. Not their job. Not their place. I was very up front about the fact that they had a dad already, they weren’t playing that role. It can be more difficult to date that way but worth it. Your obligation is to your kids first, not some guy.
So if he spanked him on the thigh did you ask what the toddler may have done to deserve this? It is possible he may have been only disciplined. I see nothing wrong with a spot for correction. If he didnt leave no bruise or marks. Also maybe they was playing around. If find out for sure. If y’all have been together 2 years and he has been good to your child and you don’t let this keep y’all apart.
Personally regardless the action of him leaving and all the drama etc should not have been done in front of the child. Sad for the child he doesn’t understand and it kinda traumatized him more.
Next time pop him on the butt if he needs it…maybe there’s no discipline at all and the kids s brat…I don’t know.But he certainly didn’t want him to go.
Sometimes kids do lie about someone hitting them. I’m not saying your child is but it does happen. My 3yr old will tell daddy (my husband) that I “punched” when I won’t put my fist to a child. But also you been together for 2yrs and if he never complained before then I wouldn’t take his word I’m sorry. I’m also with u only certain ppl can punish my children and it’s only 2 other ppl. Because they spend time with them and no not whooping them either before some of u freak the f out.
Y’all I’m in a relationship and he has custody of his kids and I dont smack his his they get disciplined but not smacked that is not my job that is his and we have been together 10 years I have kids of my own and he doesn’t smack mine well they are grown now all of them but when they we’re all younger some people just have boundaries they don’t want crossed or feel they should not be crossed and maybe this is one of them maybe it has to do with the other parent of the child involved just my opinion
2 years and you throw it away due to a possible smack on the leg? Feel like this isn’t the whole story. Obviously more going on to throw away 2 years over something so ridiculous.
Why didn’t you tell him the truth about why you made “Matt” leave? That’s my question, if you believed he abused your child, tell your child that and it’s not acceptable.
The whole thing is you believed your child. First .and if u know your baby is telling you yhe truth and the guy lied. Dont be confused the baby will get over not seeing him anymore. But he will be safe.
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I was going to give you a big long speach but it won’t do you any good, but I’ll say I still going through the same situation but they’re older know, as you can see things work out for the better if you listen to both sides instead of one side, and you might want to to find out if “your” other half has a history , there’s something wrong here but you’ll figure it out
No I feel she did the right thing. He could have told her if the child was acting up however all kids do. Something worse could have happened next time.
Why did he denied??? If he did it for a good reason he should able to explain it to you in front of your kid and prove to him it was fair due to his behavior.
You did the right thing, I can’t believe how many women defend a man, believe your kid
If he slapped hard enough his leg would be red, possibly welt? If so, goodbye to boyfriend, you can’t go wrong protecting your child.
I’m all for putting your child first, but these ppl saying toddlers don’t lie is astounding to me, part of being a good parent is knowing when your child is not being honest, because that could definitely cause issues in the future if you teach your child you will listen and react to everything they say
Id look for marks first bcuz my toddler likes to say things that arent so,also my daughter was 6 and told me her daddy touched her.i didnt think to ask him i grabbed a butcher knife and went for him.after he took off running police got him and just about went to trial where he plead guilty to not just my daughter but 6 other young girls under 12…my instincts dont lie when it comes to my children and u will hear it in their voices.goodluck maam.I know its not hard especially hearing that from your babies
Sounds like that poor man is better off without you🙄
So my son little brother & I are very close he is 4yo. On Christmas he came to me & told me his dad smacked him in the hand and told him no & in fact nobody did hit him. It’s a hard call I’m more lenient than his dad & mom so I’m thinking he likes to play on my heart strings. Good luck in figuring this all out.
Here is what I believe, you cant judge one situation and know and react. You should get the feeling if something is off. Yes I get momma bears protecting their Cubs but you just taught your child cause and reaction. Manipulation. Even if it was true. You need to search your heart and pray about this one. If you ask God will lead you!
Was there a mark of any kind? I am a Stepfather and I helped my Wife raise both of her children. And yes sometimes kids miss understand, and if there was no mark then he probably didn’t smack him, I think you need to have your child show you exactly what he did. And yes I shared the discipline with our kids.
Well, statistically speaking, many incidents of child abuse and even child deaths, are caused by the harmful actions of a boyfriend or stepdad.
My advice is don’t allow your boyfriend around your toddler…
Listen to the child I’ve gone through this with my daughters dad whom was the same way please explain to the child why you kicked out the boyfriend because once the boyfriend starts hurting your child it continues and gets worse then it will turn on you as well dont think twice ever keep the child safe!!!
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You did the right thing your boyfriend lied and said he did NOT hit himbut he did your a great mom most women put the men first im proud of you!!!
First off why tf are you even in a relationship if your SO can’t discipline your child.
Second of all I’m sure he does more for you and your child more than you actually think
Third children often lie about that shit. I would know. My step daughter did that shut all the time. Lied about me giving her a black eye. Her mom killing newborn kitties. And the list goes on.
I would have found the truth before jumping to conclusions.
I guess I would look at the leg. If he smacked him then should have left a red mark. Boyfriend may have just tapped his leg. My kids never made anything up at that age but they also could start crying if someone looked at them wrong. All depends how sensitive your child is and if he has never been smacked then any little touch would cause him to come crying to you. You said you asked the boyfriend and he said no but did he offer any other explanation as to why the child came to you crying and has the boyfriend lied to you about anything else. But your first duty is to your child and I respect you for taking quick action.
No one should spank your kid but you. Corner, time out, go to their room, other punishment but not spanking. I think you did the right thing. Children will forgive those who hurt them and want them back, that’s why you have to protect them.
First obvious problem is you:bangbang:Not disciplining your child is setting them up to be failures in society PERIOD. Second problem is teaching your child that they can disrespect the adults in the house even a man whos been involved with you for 2yrs. I have 4 kids and best believe they all have respect and turned out just fine with whoopings that taught them right and wrong. Sounds like that man is better off away from you. You obviously have no trust for that mam so good job!! Enjoy your lying child and your single parent household. 
And he lied about it! Where there’s smoke, there’s fire! Too many red flags!!!
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You did the right thing to believe your child. Now in the future you should yak about roles of discipline if you live together
U not letting him punish ur kid is basically telling him u not a long term part of our lives he is to b a male figure in the childs life u may need 2 set boundries like what type of punishments he can use at 1st but u want him 2 b ur longterm partner then and u dont let him corrwct the child the child will grow up disrespecting him as a man also u say you have been resting a toddler isknown to stretch the truth the bf threatened him but ur son probably wanting ur attention prob over exagerated the situation i was a single mother when my girls where young and they did so.e pretty crazy stuff to get attention
I agree if you have someone around to help then it should be a 50/50 relationship he didn’t hurt him
Sounds to me like you need to grow up. All kids will lie at sometime and eith him not wanting your boyfriend to go should have told you something.
Does your toddler have any marks or he could of been playing with him n smacking his leg litely or you could of put nanny cameras around your home to see what happens
She MUST keep him away. Kids safety is first. Period. Next time it could be a broken bone or shaken baby syndrome. Not worth the risk.
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spare the rod spoil the child. if he is in your life and the child needs corrected there is a difference in hitting and a light slap on the leg is not abuse.
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It’s very important that we listen to our children. It’s also important that we have people around our children that we feel that we can allow them to discipline our children out of love and not anger. I believe the main problem here is trying to determine who is telling the truth.
I don’t believe that your little one had a reason to lie to you. If your little one was visibly upset then more than likely he/she was popped. A little pop here and there will not kill them but if you both agreed that your boyfriend would not discipline then an agreement is an agreement.
Honestly, only you know whether your toddler is lying or your ex. It’s better to be safe than sorry if you are not sure.
I never allowed anyone that I dated to discipline my children either. I never left my SO to have to care for them…even if I was sick. Most toddlers don’t lie. They are brutally honest.
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I think she did the right thing… if he did and it was like a light tap he could’ve said that. But he said he didn’t so I’d definitely believe my kid and that means the guy lied and both lying and hitting is not tolerated. I applaud this woman for being such a great mother to act fast for her child 
what a wonderful mother!
You never know what could have happened with someone who will lie to your face like that
You did what needed to be done protect your kids you dont know if he did it or not but having your kids safe is better
You errored on the side of caution if you had not listened to your child and something worse happened you would have felt worse. YOU DID NOT OVER REACT.