I hate when teachers deny a kid a bathroom break. It can cause health problems. I tell my daughter to ask nicely. If she is told no and it’s a super emergency to quietly leave and quietly return
That happened to myself in middle school. I had a phone that was monitored so that way I could walk to and from school. Luckily I had the phone because my teacher refused to let me go so I texted my mom. When I explained to my mom that my teacher said no my mom called the front desk demanding I was allowed to go. I felt so much relief when the office called the classroom phone! My teacher nodded her head and said “okay will do” then gave me permission to use the restroom. 
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That happened to me in high school when I knew I got my period. Teacher wouldn’t let me go to bathroom so I got up and went anyway and was sent to principal but I don’t remember getting in trouble. I definitely would address the teacher. If she/he has attitude go to principal
Some teachers are overcontrolling or deny privilege’s out of spite for some affront.
Yeah I’d be unhappy with that situation. Definitely ask the teacher what happened, and explain your feelings.
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My son almost died last summer over a kidney infection that came on fast. Went from a low fever and feeling yuck to 105 throwing up nonstop within 6 hours. Doc said if we had waited just 12 more hours at most to take him to the er he would have had double kidney failure and sepsis. Under NO circumstances should a teacher ever make a child hold it!
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hell yes refuse the detention! WTF? get the teachers viewpoint but if your kid is telling the truth …then its time for a meeting with the principal and the teacher and yourself!
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We sent a note to school that our child was to be permitted to go to the BR at anytime. This was years ago, but she had kidney issues. Later had surgery. We kept that in place because it was not good for her to wait and because she had issues she had to go frequently. As her surgery healed, concerns were less. This is one way we kept her well and from having further damage.
I would absolutely call the school…imagine as an adult having to beg someone to use the bathroom…that is ridiculous.Kids should be able to use the bathroom when needed regardless of if they are in class or not.We all know sometimes having to use the bathroom is indeed an urgent need…what if they couldnt hold it and had an accident then what…this child would be mortified…call the school.this teacher needs training on basic human decency…Also my child WOULD NOT be going to detention for needing to use the bathroom… absolutely not.
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As a teacher it is easy to identify when it is not necessary, like 3 times in one hour. However, even with that I’d wonder if there was a real issue. The right to use the bathroom is fundamental no matter what the age. Common sense, folks.
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Sounds like you got a good understanding of kids, young one. Go in a talk with this teacher with your child, and you. If that doesn’t work - climb the ladder- Ask for a meeting with administrator, teacher, your child and you. I’ve had a career in education - aide, instructor, behavioral specialists and ending as an administrator- if nothing else I’ve learned when a parent talks listen to them and when the child speaks understand them, and if a problem in class isn’t resolved between the instructor and parent - then we(administrators) sit down and work it out.
I would. He did what he HAD to do. Sometimes I think they should be congratulated for thinking independently. Shame on the teacher.
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My son has literally had my permission since he’s been in school that if he needs to go, and he’s told no or it’s made out to be a thing, go anyway. I’d also most definitely call or meet with the school and explain that as well as my son will not be paying any consequences for it whatsoever.
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My child has a disease that causes her to use the bathroom a lot. And even with a doctor’s not from children’s hospital they would not allow her to use the bathroom when she needed to. I ended up taking her out of the our local school system and putting in an online school.
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What if the teacher were told she couldnt use the batroom ehen dhe needed to …all kids dont have .i could see if it was.a frequent thing but i dont thinl anyone shpilf be told ehen u can pr can not use the bathroom
I’d be contacting the school. I wound up peeing my pants in 3rd grade because my teacher wouldn’t let me go to the bathroom. When my step dad showed up, he raised holy hell. It’s messed up that teachers do that.
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I’d not do anything THIS TIME…… it’s 1 recess detention. Remind him you trust him and will play by the rules BUT he should make sure, in the future, to use the bathroom right before entering this teacher’s class, regardless if he has to go or not. No sense pushing the matter and making a minor situation escalate. And clearly, he knows how to push her buttons and she’s got him on her radar, already. I used to teach middle school and there’s plenty of time to use the bathroom between classes (even on an open campus we allowed an additional 3 minutes for a total of 7 minutes)and an adolescent can wait 45-50 minutes before having to go again. There were certain students who were like clockwork, every day who would need the bathroom after lunch. A good teacher is aware of her kids needs. I’ve had students hurry to get to my class, put their things down on their desk and tell me they are on the way to the bathroom in case they don’t make it back before the bell. It’s called trust and rapport you have with your kids. As a side note……. No where else but in a public school does a person have to ask permission to use the restroom.
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You work with kids so you know the bathroom is 1 excuse that seems innocent but kids can use to cause a lot of trouble. Your son sounds problematic so it’s reasonable that the teachers assumed he used it as an excuse I’d talk to your son about how his actions, history affect how he’s treated by others & that he needs to change his behavior in order to change how he’s seen, what people expect from him.
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Go straight to the principal. That’s ridiculous
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That’s demeaning. Hes not a dog. I never not allow a child to use the bathroom however I know who to trust and that if some are more than 5 minutes I know I better follow up.
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Talk to teacher, and principal to find out their policy on using the bathroom. Let them know he is not constantly asking to go to the bathroom just when he needed. It is bad to hold pee, it can lead to infections of bladder and that further leads to a urinary tract infection
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I would contact the school, I have told told my kids if they really have to go and they are told no, then go anyway. They shouldn’t have to hold themselves, the teachers sure wouldn’t!
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I would call. I had a teacher do this when I was in kindergarten and she wouldn’t let me go. I wet my pants in front of peers and Keith the janitor was called in the room to clean it up. It made me fear using the restroom at school. It made me afraid of my peers who teased me for it long after. That experience gave me so much anxiety. Your son did right by going anyway. If he had a habit of not returning to class or caught in the halls goofing off then I can give some hesitation to let him go. But he doesn’t and she can’t withhold or punish bathroom usage
That’s some crap. School definitely needs a call from momma bear!
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Don’t raise a Seattle child. He broke the rules. Do the sentence. Yes, he did the right thing not soiling himself, but that broke the rules…. and rules is rules….
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As a fellow school employee I would suggest reaching out directly to said teacher and asking her reasoning behind everything. But as for your child having to serve a punishment as a parent you have every right to question why he is being punished even after he made it known multiple times.
Whether he’s been distracting in the past my mom always said if you gotta go to the bathroom and your teacher won’t let you… get up and go anyways unfortunately even if you use the excuse all the time nobody can tell you your not allowed to go the bathroom that’s ridiculous
I couldn’t let this slide. Aside from the fact that I have a child with bowel issues, this is a basic human need. You would go to the bathroom while you’re at work if you had to go and couldn’t wait until your break, why should we expect anything less from a child. The teacher could have easily spoken to them after class and explained they didn’t appreciate not being listened to- which would have given your child time to explain privately that they NEEDED to go. It’s not like they went and messed around in the bathroom or created chaos in the hallway. Sometimes you need to go to the bathroom even after you were just in there. I’d be speaking with the teacher to clear this up immediately.
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I would totally have a fit if it was one of my kids.
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Yes I would call. The teacher is WRONG.
I would definitely talk to the principal. This teacher may have a label on him as one of those she feels she can’t trust and doesn’t believe. I wish he had used the bathroom and then went straight to the office to report he left without permission because she wouldn’t let him go and he had to go so bad he had no choice. I would also tell the principal that he is not serving detention period. Now if he is doing this all the time then that is a different story but if it is how he describes it that teacher needs a talking too 
Alot of teachers are on power trips. That’s one of the reasons why we homeschool now. Even in zoom (in our home) the teacher over stepped muted my son he had his hand up she refused to call on him (she looked at him and ignored him) and then kicked him out of the zoom meeting after he went to the bathroom. I was there the whole time he waited for full 5-10 mins.
Call the principal have a meeting, go to the school board if you have to this is not ok. It’s a human function. When you have to go go. It can cause all sorts of issues medically if you hold it in and wait.
I would lose it. Holding it is not good for your body especially if it was almost an emergency. I’d definitely contact the teacher then the principal if you get nowhere with the teacher
I will ask for a meeting with the teacher and the school principal , because this was not the first incident between them , and to have the issues written down for record .
And yes , fight his detention punishment, a kid should not be punishment for using the damn bathroom
Can I use the bathroom is not a yes or no question. It should be a statement. I am going to the bathroom, please excuse me. No one has the right to withhold it. I went to the School board to clear that up, after my daughter soiled herself, because she had a stomach virus coming on. It was a huge embarrassment for her. Kids were still bullying her into the next school year. Teacher’s have no right to deny them using the bathroom. It was written in the Student’s rights, the next year
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I would strongly suggest contacting the teacher first and discuss it with her - always good the listen to both sides of a story. There might be a very valid reason why she refused permission. Good luck!!
No that is not acceptable If that child had an accident because he abided by that teachers wishes that embarrassment could follow him throughout his school career Kids can be cruel and regardless of zero bullying policies they are still cruel. That boy did the best thing and that teacher should be written up!
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When Mother Nature calls you must answer… otherwise you pay embarrassing consequences!
I would definitely speak to said teacher about this…then if her explanation doesn’t satisfy you,go to the principal. In a case like this NO punishment should’ve been put in place! When ya gotta go ya just gotta go!!!
My daughter had the same issue not to long ago. They go to P.E. right after lunch and the Coach wouldn’t let her go. I told her if she really had to go then go ahead and go and I’d deal with the teacher. But I also told her if she was just going to goof off I’d find out and she’d have to do the punishment!
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Yes I would. Needing to go to the bathroom can’t be helped sometimes.
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happened to me in first grade in music class. We were practicing for Christmas program, on the stage she said no and down my leg it came and ran down the stage, never was refused again.
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Several teachers, aids and principle would here from me on this issue. I would of never put up with that.
This is not ok, as a substitute teacher I let kids go to the bathroom. I never tell kids they can’t go. Same with a drink. Definitely call someone.
He said it was a borderline emergency. That’s not an emergency. He should have waited. If it was an emergency and he just left he should go to the nurses office and go.
Why not speak to the teacher to get her side? Chances are thres ore to the story
My son also did this his teacher called me in class as it happened when he came home we talked about it come to find out he waited till after she finished her lesson she said no he asked again she had told him he was harassing her HA I called the principal the next day talked it out told them she had no right to refuse my child to go to the bathroom and was out of line when she told him that
My son was not punished
U need to call the school and have a meeting with said teacher and principal
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No one should ever be denied going g potty
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Shame on teacher smh. Yup go to school have talk with teacher and principal same time. If principal only sides with teacher climb higher. Adults Belittling children not acceptable
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Not ok. Ring the school.
Your kid is in the wrong. & he was punished, unfair sure. But kids are supposed to ask to use the bathroom for the reasons you listed. Maybe she had students out already. Maybe he asks every class.
Speak to the teacher first- if you don’t feel comfortable or come to a resolution then contact admin
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It’s so hard what is expected of children. I have a teeny bladder. I don’t know what I would do at school these days! Follow your instincts! You know your child best and I can hear how thoughtful you have been about the situation. You’ve got this, good mumma! - Chantal
I know Caitie can hold it, but I also know that she plays with the water. If she says she has to go, she’s not lying.
Call the school! You don’t deny children the right to use the bathroom, period.
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IDC if my son is 2 years old or 22 years old, if anyone and I do mean anyone attempts to deprive them of their basic biological needs, I will be their worst nightmare. That is inhumane. I really do not care what the child has done on previous occasions, it you are unable to be the adult and treat them as a human being than you have no business being a teacher. End of story. So go to that school and make them aware of this issue and take it as far as it needs to go for your son. He needs to know that no matter what, his mom will always have his back at the very least.
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Yes I would definitely stick up for my kid on this one
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I have had bad dreams over teachers not letting me go to the BR when I asked starting from the first grade. 2nd, 6th grade, as I was so SHY!!! By high school I would go ahead and go to the BR and nothing was said in that school!! BUT the other times the WORST happened (1 st grade) so my mother went and talked to the teacher, she felt so bad as I was never out of line or goofing off so it helped with that teacher but I was already traumatized and just couldn’t bring myself to ask during a TEST, etc when we were warned not to ask—Now I am 89 years old and would have appreciated some advice—BUT did learn the Hard way, so guess it eventually worked out, after 60 years of therapy learning to stand up for myself!!
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No one should ever have to beg to use the restroom
Ever
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Your son is very lucky that he can go to relieve himself as I know some schools the toilets aria at locked until break times
If a child is begging to go, YES it’s a problem! Do you know any classmates that you can ask? I had a situation when my son was in 4th grade, and another parent actually called me about it. I always backed up teachers, because I KNOw! After the parent called saying their child came home very upset at how a group of teachers treated and talked about my son, NEVER AGAIN! All the principal said was that it wasn’t meant to be overheard! It should have never happened! I was DONE! He no longer had any respect for them, and his behavior showed. I live in a small town, and I lost a LOT of respect for several of those ladies. We ended up moving him out, and never looked back! Good Luck!
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Tricky situation… need more info…generally no one should ever be denied their bathroom rights… nor should they have to disclose in front of a class the potentially very personal reason for needing to go.
Where I do stand firm though… detentions should NEVER be carried out on the day they are issued… teachers sometimes get it wrong…they are human… knee jerk reactions to situations happen, my own son has experienced this… then after parents think to actually ask the correct questions and the truth comes out… you can’t exactly “unpunish” a child.
Our family has gone through this so many times… to the point where I actually wonder if it is written into teaching contracts to “never openly admit to a parent when you have made a mistake and are in the wrong”…
I’d call. I’m a grown ass woman and had a night manager at my job who was the same age as my oldest daughter tell me I could not use the restroom until it was my break time.
Excuse me, kiddo. I’m a sneeze away from torpedo launching this tampon, I suggest you rethink your response.
No one should be able to dictate when one uses the rest room unless there is a pattern. Like the kid goes every day in that class.
I always told mine if you really need to go and they refuse go anyway
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I would definitely call the school and I would insist he be allowed his recess time. That is absolutely crazy.
If he was gonna get in trouble anyway, he should have just turned his back and gone in the trash can. I can not respect an adult who would humiliate a child. The teacher should have taken the chance and let him go. Kids are not saints either, but she made the wrong call on this one.
It mention it . Cause that’s b.s ! Holding it like he did can damage his kidneys. Make that point that it’s harmful to him . Plus mention that it was embarrassing that he had to beg and still be denied . !! He has to know his momma has his back . I have a son just like him handful doesn’t mean no disrespect and the biggest sweetie ever
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I would call the school and ask for a meeting with the teacher as well as the principal and my son Get it all out
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Many schools have changed to a policy that if a child asks to go to the bathroom, they have to let them go. They cannot question if they really have to or not. I would be furious if I found out my child was denied. I’ve actually told my kids they will not get in trouble by me if a teacher doesn’t let them go and they walk out to go. I understand if the child is disruptive or it is a constant issue. But a bathroom break, I mean you just never know when it is going to hit like they sometimes.
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I would call the school and raise h*ll. No one should be denied the use of restroom. His teacher was out of line. My niece is 12 and got a bladder infection because she was denied from all her teachers to go to the restroom. Mind you she has her monthly and she as so embarrassed and was not allowed bathroom privilege to change I was angry 
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I would email the teacher and copy the principal ask why it happened and ask for a meeting. Definitely make it known that your son should not be denied using the bathroom in the future and you do not approve of the humiliation. Tell your son that he needs to be a model student in her class the rest of the year so if she continues her treatment you have more ground to stand on. While you will always be understanding, he also will have to face consequences if he continues to instigate in her class.
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This is hard one …he known as bad kid so they don’t believe thing he say …but bathroom is need …if I was teacher I would gave him time when he needed be bk like 10mins if u not bk then u get this or that …or send another kid w him that wasn’t friend of his …but I calll school ask for meetings w u and teacher and the principal and ur son …my son said he sick about throw up he ask cpl time then just walk out well we had meetings they pull up camera show he meetings up w his gf 
…so now most teacher only let him go once in class and for 10mins I told him that what he gets for lying
Yes she should of let him go. And yes take up for him. You need to be his voice because she is not hearing him. Like you said your around kid’s and know what they can be like. If he used it on his self that would be devastating to him. He would be picked on by the other kid’s… Please be his voice. 
Well if you know he doesn’t tell the truth often I think you should go to that teacher and ask her what really happened that day
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I would call… there’s two sides to every story.
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You should call the school and have a meeting with that teacher talk to her if you don’t get results talj to the principal.
My kid has GI issues. When he has to go, he has to go right then. I have told him if teachers won’t let him he go to walk out and go. Luckily we had his Doctor send a letter stating he needs frequent access to the bathroom.
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My teacher tried this once I stood up pissed my pants in front of her was never denied the bathroom again and the school changed their rules afterwards
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I would contact the school and would also tell him to go anyway. Sometimes it is better to ask forgiveness than permission. Bathroom issues a can’t decide whether it is needed on another or not, ever.
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There are so many different factors that could have been behind the reason. They could have just come back from recess or a time that they were supposed to use the bathroom, they could have been discussing something important, he could be one of the ones who are always asking to leave class, etc. I would ask the teacher her side of the story and decide how to go about it after that. Good luck x
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I would definitely call the school and be firm about the fact that if your child needs to use the bathroom that NO resistance or retaliation happen. Explain that your child has had issues with this particular teacher before and you fear her actions could be retaliatory. I would also let it be known that recess detention will not be enforced in this case and if it is you will be filing a complaint with the Board of Education against the school and the teacher and will be seeking the counsel of an attorney for Human rights violations. Be tough, this is your child and if he needs to use the bathroom then he shouldn’t have to ask permission, but just let staff know he needs to go.
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Yes I would put a call it is unacceptable to detain someone for the call of nature.If your son was found causing blatent disruption elsewhere in classrooms, corridors etc would be a different matter but he only went to the toilet he doesn’t deserve a detention or the embarrassment in front of others 
Go to the principal and tell him/her you refuse to let your son serve detention for having to use the bathroom, tell then youll take it to the cops for neglect of a child on school property
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She can tell him no, but if it is an emergency she cannot refuse him access to the restroom. In PA, a teacher can face serious repercussions if they refuse and a student has an accident. If your son isn’t a frequent flyer to the bathroom, I don’t see why she wouldn’t allow him to go. I have a not the first 5 minutes or the last 5 minutes of class, but my students are able to just sign out and go. I don’t want the constant disruption of them asking me to go.
The teacher was in the wrong. If a student asks for a bathroom break let them go. There could be other issues going on.
I remember being denied going as kid in 1st grade I peed right there in my desk. I tell my kids all the time if they have to go and are told no kindly tell them okay well my mom says u don’t pay for our medical s bills so I won’t be holding it you can feel free to cal her and walk to the bathroom and return
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You should definitely contact the principal about the issue.
No child should have to beg to use the bathroom. That’s beyond ridiculous.
I would’ve contacted the teacher and run her up one side and down the other for punishing my child for this.
My feeling on this as a mom of multiple kids….all kids can be a handful at times. I was a preschool aid for 8 years. I loved my job and the child and parents really like me. Compassion is apart of being a teacher. My daughter just yesterday told me if a student uses the rest room will class is in session the recess gets taken away. No I am not okay with this at all! Since Covid hit our world I have not been allowed to step foot in my daughter school. 2 years now. Only way to participate is in ZOOM PTA MEETINGS. I feel that school has to much control of our children and their education. I say stand up for your child. If if you pull you child from school the day he has detention and get his class work to take home.
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I give my children permission to use the bathroom as needed. I have their back 1,000% I would report the teacher and request a meeting with the principle asap
What does your son want you to do? What is the school trying to teach him about following rules and listening to teachers. Sounds like this isn’t the first time he has been in trouble.
You could call teacher and express your concerns but students do skip when they are “having emergency”(I sub). He should still have to do detention Or he will try it again
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I’ve had that problem. I met with the Head teacher and every new teacher my kids had in school. Explained that if they were refused permission to go to the restroom they would leave the class anyway and explained why…they both had issues that required them to go immediately.
No one can pee to order and no punishment would be accepted. If they felt my child was going too often they could let me know and I would investigate the problem.
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I would ask for a conference with your son present. This may be a reoccurring issue with your son and this teacher abs maybe she has discussed with him previously. Having a conference with him present will allow both sides the opportunity to say what happened and why they did what they did. In the conference, your son can ask his teacher how he should handle the situation in the future. This will teach him how to appropriately advocate for himself, while respecting authority.
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Your son is 13 years old…
that teacher has him in her class every single day she spends alot of time with him, in all honesty she probably knows if he was bullshitting her and he probably was… smh i’m sorry he’s 13 years old and if I remember correctly you have 7 to 10 minutes between classes to get to the other class and the class is usually only 40 minutes long… so maybe call and talk to the teacher with an open mind because nine times out of 10 your son he’s probably not telling the whole truth. 
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Would we wait for permission to use the bathroom as adults? When have we suddenly needed to pee?
Screws the ignorant rules.
Have your kids backs.
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I would contact the school… I had a teacher do the same thing to me when I was in high school. I was lucky the principle saw me walking into detention and question what I was doing there. When I told him I was in trouble for using the washroom after the teacher said I wasn’t aloud for no good reason and it was an emergency… he stepped in and made the teacher apologize to me and said I would not have to serve detention
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From a teacher perspective, did the teacher know he left the classroom or did he walk out when she wasn’t looking? If she didn’t know he had left the classroom and then didn’t know where he was I could see that being an issue. Or perhaps the manner in which he handled the situation (sometimes the blatant disrespect is staggering). I’m not by any means blaming your child and saying he shouldn’t be allowed to go to the bathroom. I would reach out to the teacher first and hear her side of the story before reporting it to higher ups.
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Then I would refuse the detention I’ve always told my kids you ask one or two times no no more than three if you got to go and really have to go you get up and go
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I told my children, Ask if teacher says no then go anyway!! You will not be in trouble. No one can tell the other when their bladder has to release. Period 
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