I have 7 kids and I say to my husband and them I’m not worried about a present or flowers all I ask for is a card on my birthday Christmas and Mother’s Day!
I would say something!
Why? Does it change anything? Will it cause strain on your relationship with him? I was just happy to have almost all my kids and grandchildren in my presence. (One daughter and granddaughter live in S.C.)Presents don’t really mean anything. Presence is what counts.
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I read it as he bought gifts for his daughters mum, not his girlfriends mum?
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I’m sorry momma🥺 He should’ve at least went 50/50 for the gifts, that way none of the mothers would feel hurt. Your feelings are valid I would be hurt too😕
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No why would you try to create drama that doesn’t need to be?
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It hurts I know. Plus him saying he spent money elsewhere was very rude.
Yes you should be because a hand written card or note cost barely anything. He could have come and spent time with you. Maybe make you dinner or something. If you are hurt you should definitely tell him. It’s not about the gift or the money it’s the lack of appreciation and acknowledgment. My grown son didn’t get me anything but a card and we spent time together! It was perfect.
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By his girls mom does he mean his Children’s mom or his spouses mom? I’d be upset at my son or daughter if they chose to buy me a gift over the mother/father of their own children. I understand we all want something but at the same time I want my children to take care of the family they created, first.
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It’s okay moma, really. Tell him how you feel and move on. My oldest daughter 14, is usually always the first to say it to me and the first to write me handwritten poems and things she has doodled. I felt a little sad at first, but just being around them made me Happy. Sometimes we have to extend grace to the people we love. Yes, it would have meant a lot for him to do something or acknowledge you more than just doing laundry at your house. Yet, instead if viewing it that way, you could have used the time he was doing laundry to spend quality time with him, which I view as being better than any gift. I’m sorry he hurt your feelings. Men can be very forgetful. My fiance didn’t get me anything, it hurt my feelings. I told him how I felt and enjoyed my day anyway. Blessing to you Moma
He came over, spent time with you, and did laundry. Time is more valuable than anything. I would just be thankful you saw him.
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I’m blessed. Thank you. Love you. For those who can’t say nice thing’s once a year there are nice 50 cent cards that can do it for you. Sign it with love and your name. No matter what, she birthed you. 
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It is sad but honestly I do not know what is wrong with children. A card,a visit anything.It is certainly not the amount of money someone spends.It is that they care enough about you to remember.If he could spend 100.00 on the girls mother he could have halfed it and gone 50/50.That is not thoughtful at all.
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Nope. If he wanted to buy you something he would have. What are you going to accomplish by bringing it up? Nothing but tension. Gifts are not necessary and they shouldn’t be expected.
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You should be so very proud he made the day special for his kids’ mother! Put her first! And he really came to do your laundry? If faint if my son did any laundry. He sounds like a wonderful man with priorities set right!
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Wow…that’s sh*tty af. I’d be hurt too.
I’m sorry
His girls mom???
Oh Hell No:rage: …u btr take ur azz & go 2 “Ur girls Mom’s” house & do laundry!!!
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I sure he would of said happy mothers day, if he didn’t buy you anything just be grateful you seen him
Idk why women get so booty hurt on this day! Mother’s and father’s day arent real holidays. We never get each other gifts just make a nice dinner…i never expect anything from my kid or when he gets older…
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I think a simply Happy Mother’s day is enough. Not sure what the big deal is? I don’t really do anything for my mom except have a BBQ and other years it’s a simply hug and I tell her happy mother’s day. Kids are no matter how grown they are. I don’t except nothing from mine.
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I don’t think he did her laundry, i think he came over to do HIS laundry
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The context of him spending his money on his girls mom is confusing me. Did he spend money on his girlfriends mom or did he spend it on your grandchild’s mom/the mother of his child?
You can definitely express to him that you are feeling hurt that he didn’t buy you anything. You mentioned you don’t ever expect anything from your kids so maybe that is why he felt that you’d be okay with just him coming over rather than bringing you gifts. He still could’ve made you a handwritten card that day even if he didn’t have any money - but maybe he thinks that would’ve been meaningless to you since it isn’t a physical gift. Your feelings are completely valid and you can bring them up to him if you want too.
I also don’t recommend telling him or asking how he’d feel if you didn’t get him a birthday gift or a Christmas gift because at that point, it will really sound somewhat toxic and that you only want materialistic things rather than just spending time with your sons - rather than what you stated about never expecting anything from either of your boys.
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Point the way to the laundromat for him
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I will get a phone call when they were younger I’d say let take a book and lay in the sum for 4 hrs with peace and quite they would leave me be for usually 21/2 hrs so guess I was lucky
I would definitely say something 
unacceptable his mother-in-law is more important than you? Why doesn’t he do laundry at her house then?? Make your feelings known!
Good god, the amount of women in here talking about not acknowledging their child’s birthday as “revenge” like, literally, wtf is wrong with y’all? Like jfc yes it’s nice to be acknowledged on Mother’s Day but to hold that kinda grudge against your child? Petty. PETTY AF. Grow tf up, y’all.
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He offered to do your laundry and visited you that’s more than some get. You taught him well if he bought stuff from his daughters for their mom.
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I think you should say something to him. Maybe he feels like he has to prove his self to his girlfriend’s mom and doesn’t have to prove anything to you. But if he’s an adult then he needs to understand that just because you’re his mom you do have feelings too.
Was he doing your laundry?
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If he can spend that much on his girls mom, he could have at least got you some flowers or a card.
My kids are teenager’s and even though they couldn’t buy me anything they all 4 made me separate handwriting letters made by themselves… At least a happy mother’s day and something to eat or your favorite snacks would’ve mean a lot!!
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Many you should have the dad do it in a form of teaching him in a way to love a mom .even if he just makes you something
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He don’t work 24/7 … And the other one is wrong…that is so disrespectful… What you allow will continue…
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You have a right to be hurt and in your feelings. Especially if this grown ass man is still using his mom’s house to do laundry like that don’t cost money to wash and dry. And to get “I’m sorry I spent everything on a bm mom vs actual mother” and still come over to do laundry. I would of been a smart ass and probably said well then have her wash the laundry or use her house. He should have left that mother-in-law part out because that really stings.
Girl my 7yr old didnt make me a card n i said something !!! Let er loose 
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No He knows and he said I am sorry.
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That’s terrible. Tell him next time he needs his laundry done to bring it to his girlfriend’s mother
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This hurt my feelings just reading it. I’m just sending a virtual hug because to me this was beyond disrespectful of him.
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Just tell him your feelings were hurt in a non confrontational, non emotional way. You teach people how to treat you. If he thinks it’s no big deal to you, that will be the norm.
If he spent 100dollars that enough to buy mother and mother-in law something I would say somethings
I think it’s petty. My 2(although younger, but old enough to know) have no idea what mothers day is. Nobody has ever taught them. They know what fathers day is, because I taught them and make sure they do something for their father. Even though he’s never around. Do I whine about it? No, because they’re my children and the give me surprises all the time. Being a parent is a choice and privilege all on its own.
Tell him to take his laundry to his girls mom. done!
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You’re mad that he did for the mother of his children and not you? You even mention the amount spent, not considering that perhaps there was a specific gift the children wanted to get their mom? Not that it should have to be explained to you. One of our jobs as mothers is to raise our children to go out into the world and create their own families, and when they do that, their own family becomes priority. He came to visit and to help with household chores so that his mother could rest on mother’s day. That in itself what a thoughtful gesture. Money/gifts should not equal love.
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That’s just incredibly hurtful… End of storey…
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They both could have done something on Saturday! Sad for her😇
Mine never gets me anything
Forget his birthday. See how that works
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Do not let him do his laundry thete
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I would say something. He’s an adult for Christ’s sake. Stand up & tell him straight up.
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Hand him his dirty laundry and tell him take it to his girlfriend’s mom to do it!
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Yes… let him know that he Hurt Your Heart !!! 
It’s times like this I want to delete Facebook, my brain hurts, you don’t expect anything but are hurt he chose to spend money on his partner from their mutual children?? When there are children involved the grandparents have to take the back seat
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If you’re not expecting anything, it shouldn’t hurt you… You’re jealous he spent money on his gf mom and not you. Tell him it hurt your feelings and move forward…
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You sound like you are harboring more issues than just a gift missing for Mother’s Day. Happy Mother’s Day acknowledgment should be all you would EXPECT from anyone. If you are treated to dinner or gift that’s a bonus.
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Boys for ya ! I finally got a call that night .
Bluntly… sure he has you but doing the laundry for you is a gift in & of itself. Be thankful he did something at least. Money gifts not worth anything.
We didn’t have the money for Mother’s Day & my daughter didn’t care. She brought me bread in bed, made her grandma & I a card, gave it to us. And she showered me with kisses. Actions are more important than monetary gifts. This is just whining because you didn’t get something. He did the laundry for you!
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I know the feeling but remember, they think we will understand bc well, we are their mom. It doesn’t excuse it but they will never know the feeling until it is one day done to them.
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There seems to be some clarification needed. When you say his girls mom are you talking about his baby mama or his girlfriends mom? Cause if it’s his baby mama you need to get over it, he is doing the right thing and taking care of the mother of his children and I’m sure the gift was more from the kids than him at that point. If it’s his girlfriends mom, you have every right to be upset. His girlfriend should have used her own funds for her mom and he do the same for you.
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Hell yes! You come before his girlfriend’s mom! Tell him to do his clothes at the laundromat. That’s just plain rude!
As a mother…I’m betting he was embarrassed and defeated by not only having to say he had nothing to give you but also needed to do laundry. Let him know it hurt and that a note would suffice next time. Then squeeze him and tell him you love him and that life gets better
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Were you a Good Mother?
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Some of these comments are wild. And you wonder why your kids don’t talk to you anymore.
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I’ve had a rough relationship with my mother. There have been many times where she didn’t get me anything for my birthday or Christmas out of spite yet I continue to spend nearly about $100 on her for every special occasion.
Believe me, I get feeling unappreciated.
I too am a mother of a 6yr old boy & baby # 2 on the way. I’m thankful for my baby’s father as he fills the void & let’s me know I’m appreciated with quality time & thoughtful gifts.
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Id just tell him. I gave birth to you therefore i should ALWAYS come before the gf mother. I am very hurt by this and hope that it doesnt happen again. Also let him know its not about the gifts is about the thought that counts something made or from the dollar tree is not to much to ask for.
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I would have been very upset too. I would tell him something would of been nice. A cupcake and a card would of been fine. That’s not asking too much. He should honor you since you are his mother.
I see this a little differently, I see her mom being a pain in the butt and then just wanting to throw a gift at her to shut her up, your son being so comfortable with you he comes to do his laundry at your house he wouldn’t go to her mother’s house would he?
Wow…just WOW! I can understand that your feelings may be hurt but come on. Yes Mother’s day is a day to celebrate Mom’s but it doesn’t mean you are entitled to a gift of some sort. The value of time spent together is worth more than all the gifts and gold in the world! You could say something to him but then just imagine…him having the thought " well I have to buy my mom something or she’ll be upset". I wouldn’t ever want my kids to feel that way. Sure, he could have used the money he spent on someone else, on you… But you know what? He probably made another mom’s day and for that, YOU should be proud of him! Every year we buy Mother’s day gifts for my bf’s mom & grandma and spend time with them and I rarely even see my own mom (on Mother’s day), let alone buy her anything. I don’t feel bad because my mom wants nothing from us other than our LOVE. Make the day special by inviting them over for a meal/game time/quality time…the value is in Presence! Not presents!
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Well he should give his baby momma a gift from their kids. Thats sweet. At least he spent the day with you? Doing laundry. Haha. Frigging kids.
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He should have took that $100 bucks and bought two gifts one for his Mom and one for his gf Mom
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It seems like nobody is reading the part where it isn’t about money, you just wanted him to give you a tiny bit of effort & love on a special day. Tell him that, ask him if next year maybe he can have his girls help make you a card 
let him know it made you sad, not angry
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Oh man! My heart breaks for you 
Say something when you feel ready. He probably didn’t think it through.
I’m sorry!!!
He sure as hell wouldn’t be doing his laundry on Mother’s Day at my house after spending HIS money on his girlfriends mom for Mother’s Day,that’s her mom not his smh people are so disrespectful these days
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If you don’t expect anything why you so hurt?
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I’m here to do laundry? I’m assuming it was his laundry, wow! it would have been nice if he had said I’m here to see you and to tell you I love you 
I would be hurt as well
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Say nothing - but on his next birthday completely ignore it. Once he learns how much being ignored hurts I am sure he will.never do it again!
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I bought my mom a nice card & a tim Horton’s gift card what is wrong with people my mom 87th birthday is soon I ordered 100.00 of movies for her
He spent it on his girl’s mom not his girlfriend mom and he had the right to spend it on whatever he want to it’s his money and I’m a mom I didn’t get anything from either one of my kids but I did spend the day with one of them the other one lives in another state but I did get to talk to him on the phone . That personally I would have felt like he came over to spend time with me while he’s doing laundry it would have been okay to me if it was me
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Ungrateful kids….make them to do their own shhhhhhhh$t
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Just forget Father’s Day’birthday’Christmas and give them a sorry ass excuse.
Um… wow. Your child is an adult. Your always his mother yes, but it’s not his job to shower you with gifts or cards… even from the dollar tree.
Instead of being jealous of the mother of HIS children getting gifts, be happy that you did a good job raising him right and spoiling her.
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I would pick that battle wisely. You have to realize he made a woman a mother too. If it isn’t about money why did you mention how much he spent on the mother of his kids? Very weird if you ask me. You also said you don’t expect anything. You being hurt and disappointed means you did indeed expect something.
At the end of the day you are entitled to feel the way you do. Say something when you think the time is right. If you don’t say anything there’s no way he’d know he hurt your feelings. Remember that he can’t read your mind. Best of luck.
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Why does it matter how much he spent on the mother of his children?
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You said you don’t expect anything so why are you upset?
“My girls mom” as in his childrens mother? Or “my girls mom” as in his girlfriends mother? That makes a huge difference on if you should be hurt or not…
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You’re hurt that he came and did your laundry and apologize? Girl girl seriously
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So Sorry Mom we all take you for granted. We do Love you and expect you to know and understand. Please don’t say anything the hint will come later and we will be sorry. Love You Mom
I am sorry that happened and that your feelings were hurt. As a mom you want your adult children to buy you gifts for Mother’s Day and it can be hurtful when they don’t. Here’s a couple things to think about; in your post you said you don’t expect to get gifts from them; but you are sad they didn’t get you anything, your sad because unconsciously you expected something; even a hand written note is a gift. Another thought, the girl that he is dating might be “the one” and he wanted to do what he could to make her happy and thought you might be a little more understanding because you are, after-all, his mom? I am not saying that your feelings aren’t valid. They are your feelings and you have a right to feel them; however, it’s not their job to feel your feelings and by bringing it up after you told them you didn’t expect anything contradicts that statement. I am sorry mama.
I mean you saw him and he acknowledged that he didn’t get you anything… but you don’t expect anything
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Get over it he’s still youe son my son didn’t 
buy me a card or anything but that’s OK he’s my son 4 ever
Appreciate his honesty & put him to work!!! Do the laundry, come cut grass…whatever. Ask him to write you a letter or make a card to enjoy just a reminder of his love.
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His girl (daughters mom) or his girlfriends mom ??
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To me it sounds like he spent that money on his gf mother . Not his childrens mom. She does not indicate that he has children or that she is a grandMother
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Moms always come last !!! Lol 
I would be sad too . But I’m sure he diddnt mean it to hurt you … especially boys they don’t know how to use there brains sometimes I swear .
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Krista Weigand maybe he should have done her laundry too
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Kids always break their mothers hearts 
… mine has done the same before, all I wished for was an acknowledgment 
… oh well …
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I would be hurt that’s normal. You should be able to tell people when they hurt you. An open and honest relationship is valuable.
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“I don’t never expect anything from my kids but… this momma is hurt”…
So you do expect something. That’s ok that you do. Maybe yes, you should communicate that.
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Yes Momma - say something- let them know you want flowers now so you can smell and enjoy them - not later when you can only look at them on your grave. 
This is what my Grandmother told my brothers -
needless to say it worked 
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You’ve received a whole lot of feedback on this post. For me personally, as a mother of a 2 year old, I’m in the knee high nitty gritty shitty part of motherhood and therefore should be the one celebrated on Mother’s Day instead of me worrying about my mom and my husbands mom. That being said, I still do something small and strive to at least have a meal with them somewhere in the week surrounding the holiday, but the day of is for the mom’s who need the day for a break, not to be trying to run their kids around to every grandma, auntie etc house. Grandparents day is in September. - Like others have mentioned, I’m not sure if you’re referring to his baby mama or his gf’s mother. I would be upset with the latter, but be an adult and let him know, CALMLY. If it’s the former, then he did his duty to come and see you. Guys have never been more about material things with gifts than girls. I didn’t get anything physical from my husband/son, I got to go to a paint class to enrich my soul. When my son is grown, going out of his way to make sure he comes to see me for a holiday will be enough. Because even that can be really hard, especially if the family has birthdays around the holiday etc.
Communication doesnt hurt