Should I stay or leave?

Leave him he is a bully and it will get worse

Leave him now! Run don’t walk!

Run or kick him out :flushed:

Run like your a$$ is on fire.

I would never stay. My kids always come first.

You are not gone yet ?

Yes leave totally unacceptable!

Your children should be Your top priority! Run from this horses ass!

You need to leave him

Need to dump that dirtbag

I would get out. When the bad days far out number the good, it’s time to go. I was in a toxic relationship for 13 years. I am 3 years out of it now and have been with a great man who has never once yelled at me or the kids in the two years we have been dating. There is light at the end of the tunnel. You deserve to be happy! You can PM me if you would like.

Leave him before God forbid you come home and this POS has hurt or kill your kids.

Stopped reading at “Calls your kids stupid and an idiot” You’re really asking should you leave a man that’s ABUSING your kids? Are you fucking serious?! :rage: You better leave before it escalates and he actually hurts your children! It’s too many children getting murdered by men like this!

Oh dear God please leave . This person is a powder keg waiting to go off. Please.

He’s gotta go! You deserve better

Send him packing!! He’s verbally abusing your children!! I know it’s hard but you’ll be better off!!

Leave, before you or one of your kids end up dead.

Pisses me off you even have to write about this, of course you know what you need to do or you wouldn’t have posted it ! Your kids should always come first ! Screw that POS! leave

Get out before it’s to late. !!!

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Why would you even ask an absurd question like this :roll_eyes::woman_facepalming:

:-1:WRONG :-1:He’s gotta go :pray::mask::four_leaf_clover:your kids are first

Girllll. Those are your kidssss…leave that mf
…tf

Omfg take your children and LEAVE!!!

Don’t walk away, RUN.

Leave now today, get out!

Oh my gosh, take kids and run.

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Should I stay or leave?

I couldn’t stomach reading it all. Don’t choose this poor excuse of a man over your babies!! Leave and take the babies.

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Run. Do not let your children be abused bc that’s exactly what this is. If you stay you’re just as guilty for letting it continue.

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I don’t even have to read through this to know you should leave I got to the part where you have to “defend” your 3 and 2 year old and stopped
Leave. Choose your kids and don’t be selfish who give a flying “fuck”
How he “feels” about you
Your kids love your and you have an obligation to protect them you can not change what you have allowed however you are choosing to let it continue I was a single mom and I get it but it’s time to
Go it’s time to choose your children you are strong enough IF you choose to be

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Why is this even a question? If anyone talked to my kids once they are NOT a part of my life. Why are you still there? Stop making excuses to stay because your kids deserve better than that. Its seriously.disgusting you have stayed even this long.

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He’s emotionally abusing your kids. You should have left the second he started calling them names. Get out now before they’re traumatized for life by him because it’s only going to get worse.

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Find that strength for your kids and leave, don’t look back. It’s about keeping them safe above everything else.

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Leave before your babies or you get hurt. It’ll be hard but your kids come first and if they remember the awful things he’s said and done, you will have scarred children. Yelling doesn’t seem like a big deal but the damage could be severe. You need to raise strong healthy confident kids and an environment like that is not SAFE HEALTHY OR BENEFICIAL for them or you. Reach out to state agencies if you need to there are tons of resources out there. As mom you have to be strong and do what’s best for the babies. They didn’t ask to be born and be in that situation. At the end of the day they need a safe place and if can’t do that please consider outside help for their sake. Not bashing my heart hurts for you and your kids. Please get out before it’s too late.

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Why tf is this even a question?! Why would you let someone abuse your child?

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Leave, it’s only going to get worse & will eventually turn physical towards your kids. No one would ever call my kids names or yell at them, ever. I think you already know the right answer. And if his own mom is worried about him, then she also knows that there is a problem.

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Leave it gets worse trust me! My ex fiance neglected my child when I was working he didn’t feed or change him and then he pulled my hair he then started to put down my son in his potty training process… after I left him my son was alot better

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I’d rather be a single parent than let him call my kids names. I’d leave but that’s me.I wish you and the children good luck.

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LEAVE! Your job is to protect those babies and should always come first. I would never let some disrespect my children. Anyone who will call your child names like that is dangerous in my opinion. You all deserve so much better. You are a Gem! Don’t let anyone make you feel like anything less.

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You shouldnt be asking for people’s permission or opinion on you leaving. Your more scared of being a single mom then the emotional abuse your kids are going through. So what if he isnt hitting them emotional abuse still leaves scars. Even at that age.

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Leave and don’t look back. I speak from experience. The longer you stay the worse it gets literally. The damage and healing process will be more difficult for you AND the kids the longer you stay.

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I am trying to say this in a supportive manner…. If you have to question whether leaving a situation that is abusive for both your BABIES and yourself, I think you really should find some counseling… there is a reason you feel you need to stay and that needs to be addressed. You and your children deserve to be happy and not live in fear. Don’t rob them of a happy, healthy childhood.

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You can do whatever you see fit however I’ve seen this in my life and too many other people. It just starts out was yelling and then it escalates to throwing things and then escalates to him and then I can escalate to where you don’t make it. Leave before the escalation gets too bad. Your kids are watching everything and they will remember it all and you as a mother will have to answer for it just like all of us have. It’s okay to be happy and alone. It’s okay to be a happy single mother. It will be harder but trust me it will be worth it

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You need to leave. You could lose your kids or worse he could hurt them. You say you’re scared to do it all but you probably already are and it’ll get so much easier once the stress of his abuse isn’t lingering over your head and the kids too. Just because he doesn’t hit them doesn’t make it ok he is abusing them emotionally and you could end up getting in trouble if cps does get involved. All he has to do is hit you have a neighbor call the cops then bam everything is turned upside down. Get out while you still can. It’s better to have just a healthy mom than a mom and dad who are unhealthy.

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Yes, leave, better for you to struggle being a single mom rather than regretting staying and things escalate into him hurting one of them. Emotional abuse stays forever. Good luck.

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When you became a mom your children became the priority. You children AND you deserve to be treated kindly and loved. I think you already know that you need to walk away from him, and very soon. Your children look to you to protect them and if your man bullies them and you don’t end it, they will grow to resent you later. Good luck to you!

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What kind of question is this? You said he put his hands on you, and calls your kids stupid. Your kids come first. No matter what. And if he puts his hands on you that’s even more of a reason to leave. Baby daddy or not, fuckin leave.

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Leave. Why would you be with someone who treats your children like shit. And especially you in front of them

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When it comes to your kids DO NOT ever chance that he will change… those babies didn’t asked to be yelled at and I know that’s harsh but you need to think about that situation harshly I wish my parents were never together it was traumatizing you’ll get more comfortable and just settle don’t do that for the sake of those babies when they get older they will resent you for not leaving

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Leave!! Put your children first and show them that no one has to put up with that type of crap. Nobody wants to be a single parent, I understand. I’m a single parent myself, you can do it on your own. Don’t allow no one to terrorize your kids. That’s mental and emotional abuse!

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You said no rude comments, but you post on a mom page knowing everyone would tell you to leave. Your kids should come first. Would you want your kids to go through what you are? It’s common sense. Dude isn’t going to change, calling your children names, and you have to question if you should stay??

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You know what you need to do. You have to protect those babies and yourself! Get out ASAP!

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Being a single mom is much less terrorizing then staying with abuse. To be able to breathe freely and the comfort of you n kids being safe really outweighs anything else. U will be ok sweetheart. And SAFE!!

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This shouldn’t be a question⁉️ your children is your priority they come first all the time. He might not if put his hands on them babies yet… Verbal and emotional abuse is still abuse it’s not healthy for them children to be in. Things are not going to get better they are just gonna get worse. Leave before it’s too late. I will never let anyone talk down on my children real father or not. You know what you need to do. Being a single mom is scary yes. But I would rather be a single mom then going through a situation cause one of my children got hurt.

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If you have to question leaving when a man calls your baby “stupid” or “idiot”…you need to reevaluate YOU and need some self love mama. Your child depends on you to be the best you…so look at yourself and ask…am I my best me?..if the answer is no, remove what will make you the best you!

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Ok. So in the begining where i read about his anger, depression, being on meds and drinking alcohol was right away huge red flags for me… Right after that mentioning him getting mad at the 3 year old… Was enough for it to be a done deal… Reading the rest only tells me that someone is going to end up seriously injured or dead… And its most likely gonna be one of your babies… At the end you said you are scared of being a single mother… Feeling Fear is natural when you are about to do something very brave. Be Brave Momma. Its hard to be a single mother. Not impossible. There are tons of resources to help. I know because i have been there. Feel free to message me for guidance and advise. Good luck. Be strong.

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Ultimately the decision of course is yours. It would be the right thing to do. 100% for the emotional and mental well being not only for you, but for the kids as well. It is emotional abuse and it will have long effects.
It’s scary to think of being a single mom, at this point the end result of that is the healthier option for the sake of all you guys.
He and only he has to make the decision to better himself and take care of himself. It is not your responsibility by any Means. He has to be accountable. There is no reason ever to put hands on you, and you don’t want his frustrations to exceed on to the kids physically.
Do not feel guilty for choosing to leave, in my opinion, at this point in time it is the right decision.
Best of luck to you :heart:

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I think you know what you need to do. It’s a very hard situation but you do need to think of the affect this will have on the children. I’m sure your mum & friends will give you the support you need, men like this never change, I had 1 for 11 years, even 8yrs after the split he still tries to control situations what involve the kids

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Definitely not a relationship you should stay in. You’ll ruin your kids if you allow them to continually be treated like that.

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Hunni get out whilst you get the chance seriously it’s abuse what he’s doing and your kids are young enough to adapt. I became a single mom of 12 18 months ago due to domestic abuse mainly towards the kids you can do this you need to do it before the kids get damaged by it my ex used depression as an excuse too here if u need a chat feel free to inbox me x contact refuge if u need to it’ll be the best thing ever . I was scared to do it on my own yes it’s hard but I’d rather it be hard and have a settled home than walking on eggshells for the rest of my life xx

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Girl leave and never look back! Those babys deserve a happy home and that’s clearly not with him! One parent is better than a shitty " dad" around being verbally abusive to them and sometimes physically abusive to you

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Look at it through the kids point of view. You need to leave THAT is doing the right thing. Having your kids in a home where they can feel safe and not constantly yelled at is what’s best for them at least that’s my opinion on that.
Don’t stay because you think they need a male figure.

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You have no clue what he could do when you’re not around if he’s like that when you are there. And you don’t want to find out. If he wanted to change he would, so leave. If you need resources, maybe edit your post and add your state so people can help you find some.

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You need to leave before it turns into something much worse. Plus why would you want your kids around that type of person…

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You need to get out now with your kids before one of them actually do get hurt. Who’s to say he won’t lose his temper one day & do more than just name calling ( which is still NOT okay!) If you won’t do it for yourself do it for your kids. They deserve better than that & so do you. Being a single mother is better than being in a toxic relationship. I know that from experience.

I have no idea what to say to this lady other than if his medication isn’t controlling his anger. Those children are in danger. She is in danger. This is not a safe or healthy situation at all.

I am astounded as to why you would even ask of you should stay? You are letting someone abuse your children. These early years will form how they see themselves and the world. LEAVE NOW.

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Leave. It won’t get better. He may not be physically abusing your children- YET. But he is abusive to them mentally and physically abusive to you.
Is this how you want your children to view love in a relationship?
It’s hard but it is the right thing to do

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LEAVE! Trust me, just leave. Because if you stay and let your children be exposed to that when and if you finally do leave you will regret it every single day for the rest of your life.

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Get out! Trust your instincts. He seems like a ticking time bomb, and well, bombs eventually explode! Keep the kids safe, there are plenty of decent men out there, it’s okay to be alone for a while. You are more than capable of parenting them as a single parent, especially since their safety and well-being may depend on it!

Honestly I didn’t read all of this, but the second I read how he was talking to your children is unnecessary . Children need a stable loving environment and that is mental abuse

You know your doing the right thing if you have to ask. I know it was a misspell in your post but SAD figure is right. He’s going to hit your kids he may be even hitting them when your not around. Just like you found him you can find another guy who will love you and your kids. He’s mentally scarring then with the way he treats them. Get out now you can raise your kids on your own it seems as if your doing that already if he’s treating them like grown up anyway their kids.

Ted Bundy had good days too! Abusive manipulators are good at toying with your emotions but there are red flags flying ALL OVER place. His own Mom is worried about his behavior. His anger is not controlled with medication. He’s abusive to you and the children. You are the best person who can advocate for your children. It would be negligent for you to stay with him. Deep down, you know leaving him is the right thing to do and no amount of fear as a single mom should scare you as much as staying with him and what he has the potential to do and has already done. Don’t let you and your kids become a statistic. I may sound extreme however, these are the kinds of warnings signs that devastating news headlines begin with! Your kids are young enough that they will not remember him if you leave now and you have an opportunity to change their development before reaching their maturity at age 5. Please, make a plan in secret then execute it quickly.

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You said it yourself you want to do what’s best for the kids! Run! They shouldn’t just have a man figure just because it’s considered “normal” girl it may be scary to do it on your own but you can do it a hell of a lot better than staying with him!

It’s time to start defending your kids properly by leaving and never looking back, they are being emotionally abused, don’t let this continue.

I hate to say it but my brother was like that. He was emotionally and mentally abused by my father. Which is no reason to do it to his girlfriends daughter. His girlfriend’s daughter suffered from suicide thoughts because of him and we always told her get rid of him she’s going to hurt your baby emotionally. I don’t want to see that done to any kid. God bless you and your sweet babies

You’re scared about being a single mom to 3 again when you should be scared about the damage your boyfriend is doing to your kids. You’re allowing your kids to be verbally and emotionally abused all because you don’t want to be a single mom again. You clearly have your priorities screwed up. Protect your kids from this pathetic individual and leave! Do what’s best for your kids.

Your kids seeing you as a strong mother who defends them and raises them on her own, no matter what that looks like, is far better than them living in an angry household with 2 people. It doesn’t sound like he’s being a parent, anyway, just someone else to worry about and care for.

I would LEAVE before it escalates further. He hasn’t hit them BUT abuse comes in many forms. Those babies don’t deserve the emotional and verbal abuse they are going through and neither do you. The fact his mother is worried about y’all should be a HUGE RED FLAG! She knows his history. I would rather be a struggling single mother than live in that torment every day. I was in your children’s shoes and it messed me up. It took a long time to get over the PTSD from it. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone. Get away and get an order of protection. Protect your children from any further abuse.

He definitely needs help! Alcohol doesn’t help your brain at all so add that in with an anger disorder or depression disorder which he has BOTH, it will leave him being someone he’s not. He needs to get sober & take care of his mental health.

Leave now please before he hurts u or ur kids more . Ur children shouldn’t have to be abused. Yes and u leaving is the right thing. Keep u head high and know ur doing the right thing and u will find a man who will love u and ur kids and not abuse u guys

Please girl, for yourself and your kids, leave….fast!
You DO NOT deserve that and your kids most certainly don’t deserve that. What kind of man is he to put his hands on a woman and belittle children. That is wrong on so many levels.
I think deep down you know what the answer to your question is because you shouldn’t even have to ask other people. Don’t raise your kids in an environment like this. Don’t let them see that this is “normal” because it’s not.
I can only imagine how your kids feel. There is nothing wrong with raising your kids alone but I promise you there is someone out there that will love you and respect you and your kids! I have a friend who is a single dad, so sweet and respectful. Maybe you two can chat with each other

Your babies would rather a happy live with only mom, than being brought up with a father like that. You know you should leave…make a plan, leave, and DO NOT look back. Protect yourself and your babies before it’s to late.

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Girl protect your kids and leave! It’s only gonna get worse. He’s already physically abusing you and emotionally abusing your kids. Somebody’s gonna really get hurt and it’s gonna be too late. I rather be a single mom raising 3 kids in a safe environment than deal with that toxic environment in which who knows what kinda impact it’s gonna have on your kids in the future.

Run. Protect your child and get out of this situation. That’s not love and it’s not safe. It’s better to be a single mom who is safe with her kids safe instead of being in that situation. I know it’s hard and scary, I’ve been there! I’m sure many women on this page have been there but you need to ask yourself how many moms probably wish they would have just left before it was too late?

Leave. Now. He’s abusive and going to cause issues with your children. Mental and verbal abuse is just as bad, if not worse than physical.

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I didn’t even have to read this through to tell you to leave. NOBODY should be calling your children names like that. Disgusting behavior and mental abuse. Please get out before he does put his hands on your children next

Run and don’t walk out of that relationship. Your children need you to protect them. It’s ok to be alone. I was alone and my kids are great and happy!! Have very good careers and I have 2 beautiful grandchildren. Never let someone out there hands on you or the kids!!

At minimum move out and don’t take those around him at all until he’s proven to be better but honestly you should just leave. If he does get better yall can always work it out later but don’t do that to yourself and especially don’t do that to those babies.

Leave, that is not a good environment for your children or you. I was married to an alcoholic for 18 years, I should of left sooner. It did so much damage to my sons self confidence. Yes its tough being a single mom, but u can do it. Stay strong ,your kids need u.

Run Mom… Run… It will only get worst and your kids will be scarred for life… Please do it for your children, they deserve better… Rather a single Mom than to subject my kiddies to such abuse… Please leave. :sob:

If you leave you are ABSOLUTELY doing the right thing.You would be being a mother who ALWAYS puts her kids first (before any man) and keeping your kids safe from either physical or emotional damage.
That is our first job as mothers…Please leave,it is definetely what is best!
Being a single mom is scary (I know I’ve done it) BUT in the end it’s going to be way easier than carrying on the way your living now.Best of luck to you momma! Keep yourself and your babies safe.

There is a lot of emotional abuse, please lake it from someone who had an emotionally abusive father the scars go deep and affects your personal relationships. It is difficult to be. a single mom but watching your kids turn out healthy and happy is worth all the struggle

Leave, I’m not being rude when I say that abuse gets worse in time. You’re being selfish because you don’t want to be alone. Really?

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Get your sit and get girl. I was in a similar situation about 3 years ago. I stayed with him for 11 years thinking it would get better, it only got worse with getting physical. I had to leave for my son’s sake so he wouldn’t continue to grow up in a toxic environment.

You should not put yourself through thay & you are not showing your children a good example by staying. I’m sorry, but that is the worst thing you can do for your kids.
You’re dealing with a narcissist & you can’t change him, I lived with one for 13 years, 9 years later, I’m finally beginning to overcome what he put me through. Good luck & know that you’re not alone. Get connected with people that can be there to help you emotionally.

Your children need to be protected & loved he is abusive & you’ve mentioned his mother is concerned about his temper all the red flags your mentioning and you haven’t LEFT YET! WOW. That’s not love. YOU are just as guilty if you don’t protect your innocent children from him.

Leave ! It’s not a healthy place for the kids or you too be in . They don’t deserve to be called stupid or idiots they are learning you don’t want them learning his behaviour! Document everything tho as you don’t want him being unsupervised around your new little baby that you sure together when he gets so angry and stuff ! Xx

The question you need to ask yourself is, “do I want my children to be in an abusive relationship when they are adults?” If the answer is no, leave! Children stay in their comfort zones as they grow up. If they’re used to being mentally and emotionally abused now, they will continue to seek that validation as adults. I’m a single mother and although I date, if anyone speaks to me AT ALL with a lack of respect, there is no way I am exposing my daughter to that. I want her to seek out HEALTHY relationships. The best way I can teach her that, is by being a good example. I say walk away.

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Leave Now!! This will only get worse!! I know it won’t be easy but if he puts his hands on you it is only a matter of time before he starts on the kids. They didn’t ask to be brought into this world and they shouldn’t have to go thru this. They can’t get themselves out of this situation you are the only one that can do this. Please for their sakes get out of this situation.