Your grandpa was just doing what works… apparent your “words” method didn’t. Wait til your son hits puberty and is bigger than you… all the words you want won’t make him mind. This is why people call cops and ask them to make their child go to school, behave, etc. Well if your child doesn’t respect your or grandpa’s authority then they won’t respect cops either (all authority figures). I was not hit or beaten but spanked and I’m fine! I also learned to shoot and played violent video games but never did anything stupid because being in trouble with authority and jail scare me. It’s funny cause I’ve known many kids that didn’t behave because their parents didn’t discipline them and would always comment about how my kids behaved. Well ummm…. 
I’d really like to revisit this when your child is somewhere in about 6-8th grade
You are so very lucky to have the grandparents in your child’s life. You are definitely over reacting!
A tap really, your just a little over board. Get real.
Your child your rules, However…. As a Young Grandparent of 13 MY HOUSE MY RULES, Your child should learn at a very early age what “NO” means and your child at a very early age should learn the word “RESPECT”.
Why do you think kids are out of control today there’s no discipline they want to go out and steal and kill take control of things I have no control over I’ll think your grandfather is correct discipline your child is so immorals and principal and values of life
You’re upset because your child was tapped on the hand??? Sounds to me like you’re not disciplining your child, and unless he spends more time with Grandpa who will, you’ll end up mourning the death of your child because they turned out to be undisciplined, unruly, and won’t know the meaning between right and wrong. Actions have consequences, and all your grandfather was doing was keeping your child from ruining his grandmothers plants. Grow up, and tell your kid to expect different types of discipline from Grandpa and Grandma than you dish out. Perhaps you might need a swat on the ass too, for raising a kid with no boundaries.
You seem to be one of those parent who if your child is wrong,you try and be nice as possible.Dont,in a year or too you will regret it.
A tap on the hand?? Yeah you’re overreacting. I could understand if he was hitting your child but a tap is a warning. If you’ve asked repeatedly, tried redirection and that doesn’t work, a little hand tap can be necessary
Oh lord. Children need discipline. My grandparents used a switch on me if I needed it. Discipline your child now or you will have more issues when their older
I would say this is over reacting, It is not like he beat your child. It was a small tap on the hand. Keeping him away from them is cruel to not only them but your child. Maybe he will learn not to touch things.
It’s fine words don’t always work and a tap on the hand like come on it’s fine
Next the words will work cause the child isn’t want to get a tap on the hand
Society is way to about feelings it’s sad
Please do share all the other ways that actually work? I grew up getting hidings and so did my siblings…guess what we’re just fine. Lol what is wrong with some parents, this is part of the reason the new generation have no respect because they are never given proper punishment…it’s ridiculous
If you keep him from his grandparents you are wrong in so many different ways. He wouldn’t even remember the tap if you weren’t talking about it. A tap on the hand is not abuse!! If something happens to that grandparent and you have kept the child from them I hope you can live with yourself.
I agree with you. We also don’t smack, hit, tap in my household. If you’ve expressed that you don’t want that being done and they did it anyway, you have every right to make whatever decision you feel is best. Regardless of what they did or didn’t do wrong, they went against what you wanted as the child’s mother and what you say goes.
Just dropped my angel off with grandparents for the day 
A lot of people on here don’t understand respect and boundaries. Set the boundary that hitting is not okay. If the grandparent isn’t going to listen, they don’t have to be around your child. Ultimately you’re the parent and if your wishes aren’t being followed for your child, you can act however you choose
** not lecturing really just trying to give helpful advice that worked for me in a somewhat similar situation** 100% over reacting and deep down seems you know that as you said tapped and a parent that truely was appalled would in my mind use slapped as the description . To add that they told you about it and then also apologized i would say there family and clearly understood your side even if it was an over reaction and respected you and your boundaries enough to apologize insted of get defensive . the grandparents seem fully aware and to ease your mind even more you could always go over helpful more acceptable ways (for you) that you use to deal with it incase they ever run into a situation again. At 4 children love push boundaries expecially with people other then mom and dad (for example grandparent) bc they they knoe they can get away with way more explain to your child When they are there and you aren’t the grandparents are in the role of love but also discipline and they need to listen or they are to discipline them( in the way you decide is acceptable but you have to give them the answer to what you do to deal with it when all else fails and they arnt listening )
It’s amazing that daycares, preschools, and schools in general ever get children to listen to their teachers without hitting them. Reading these comments you’d think it was impossible as grown adults to control a toddler without smacking them. Next time your child’s teacher smacks them on the hand remember that words don’t work and kids need discipline, it’s the only way they’ll listen is if we hit them 
give me a break. My oldest is 9 and I’ve never put my hands on my children in their lives.
With that being said, I would still cut your grandpa a break. It was a one time mistake, make clear how you want him to handle issues in the future and give a second chance.
Really, seriously ott girl
Definitely over reacting! It’s their home and they have rules too, it will help tech the child respect. It’s not like he was abusing him, it’s called discipline which more children need to learn!
Are you serious ?Their is nothing wrong with a little tap on their hand and a no I raised 3 boys I used the method and I could take them anywhere they didnt touch other people stuff now let me say I don’t and never will tolerate a child being beat or hurt but a little tap hurts their feelings more than anything u explain way u did it I tap my grandkids so good luck hope u think before not letting them go to grandparents house 
I wouldn’t allow anyone to tap or hit my child ever.
Children need to be disciplined…with love.A tap is nothing to worry about.Children need to learn that no … is no.If they don’t learn this at an early age they will become disrespectful to all others.We had to learn and they do too.No is no.
Hopefully you actually discipline that kid in ways that actually work. Otherwise you will have real problems. It was a tap on the hand. Get over it.
Discipline now or we all pay later.
You are so ever reacting…at 4 years old if you have to keep asking them not to touch the plant over and over your words are not working.
They have to learn No means No. A tap on the hand to get their attention isn’t bad.
Over reacting … he comes from a different era and he said he was sorry , it’s not like he took a belt or switch to him . Sometimes this whole talk it out crap doesn’t work and a little tap on the hand is needed .
Omgoodness. I don’t even know what else to say. So let’s just let kids do as they please and see where that gets you. In another couple of years let’s see how he reacts when you say to him, now you know we don’t touch that right? See what he does.
Well I feel if he feels terrible about it. Apologized qnd qll that. I would be ok with it. Honestly. Older people are set in their ways as far as punishments so it’s hard to break. Yes I understand you have boundaries and all that. But I don’t feel like one small incident is a deal breaker. But kids need discipline. Or they get older and become monsters you can’t control. It’s not like he beat him a switch/belt. It was a tap.
Maybe there is other ways but a tap on the hand over reacting
There is nothing wrong with a tap on the hand your overreacting
Spare The Rod? Spoil The Child."
You’re asking a baby to understand complicated ideas…demonstrative negative actions…spanking and a good tongue lashing using the word NO!!! Works pretty dang well.
Once employed a baby child Learns that the Word NO means NO!!!
Baby’s and young kids Need this not a discussion about the details and reasoning even some Adults need a good thrashing and then some and you think a child is able to understand more than an adult?!?
I do not watch grandkids that I can not discipline. My house my rules. And their parents don’t like it then don’t ask me to keep them. I do not like to spank them. I will tell them to stop first . If not, my hand on their butt is next. I do not ask them to stop doing something they are not suppose to be doing. I tell them. I am the adult, they are the child.
So u must let your child run your household. That’s what it sounds like. Tuffin up on them or they will have problems in school and through life. Discipline and respect brings love and honor.
Parents today think that telling a little child to “make better choices” will be effective. That’s funny.
Yeah your part of the problem. We shouldnt beat our kids but we should have no problem smaking hands and spanking asses.
You are way overreacting.
Ur overreacting kids need discipline just cause ur kids listen a certain way at ur house doesn’t mean they will at others
You are way over reacting. A smack on the hand now will save you a lot of problems later.
You’re overreacting and i think there’s more you’re not saying. I think you’re just looking for an excuse
I am sure your child is scarred for life!!! Don’t be ridiculous! Big reason there are so many out-of-control kids today is lack of discipline! Bet you got your bottom spanked!
They are 4 not 1 they should understand stop touching the plant. And a small smack on the hand doesn’t hurt.
I think my reaction would differ based on what he meant by a tap — literally just a tap? Or an actual smack?
It would also depend on if he’s a hotheaded type vs level headed and reasonable.
He apologized, so I’m hoping the latter.
A lot of folks on here aren’t understanding that not using corporal punishment doesn’t mean you aren’t teaching respect/discipline.
He admitted that he shouldn’t have and apologized. He has to retrain his brain because let’s face it it’s how they raised their kids. But maybe you need to stick around and teach your kids not to touch stuff.
The child will be a brat if you don’t get control now
It was a tap on the hand. Yes, you are over reacting.
Oh no. Your kid’s going to be so traumatized from a tap on the hand. You should definitely start therapy early since your child will grow up to be angry later in life from a tap on the hand he received at age 4
Obviously your words aren’t working. If he’s been told multiple times to stop, then a pop on the hand won’t harm him. But I guarantee he didn’t touch those plants again.
Oh my God y’all people don’t like to hit your kids and stuff this is why our kids are the way they are are you serious he tapped your kid on the head oh my God called 911 get over it
Totally agree with you Shannon.
Oh my. You are totally overreacting!!!
All children need discipline. How will they know that it is wrong if they are not told. And if they are told and they continue to do it, you spank them on the hand or the butt…whatever. It is teaching them not to do certain things and to not do it again.
Sounds like honest and caring grandparents he admitted and said he was wrong. Instead give him other ways to help redirect behavior. Have him take him outside. And I’d talk to the child about listening too…hes 4 not 2.
Don’t over think this, It’s a tap on the hand. I got it, my son got it and so did many others. It’s not going to traumatize him/her.
He didn’t beat your kid for gosh sake.Maybe the kid needed a little reminder . Hopefully he’ll remember next time. The kid is still living…lesson learned.
Definitely overreacting. Apologize to your grandparents. They are from a much different generation than we are in… he apologized for the tap and told you it was a reaction… that sounds like a 100% true claim! Appreciate the honesty and you need to understand that they are also learning these new methods. They’ve always taught and disciplined in a different way for how many years?? Rome was not built in a day… cut some slack as they learn to do things your way.
You mite have the no hitting rule in your house but when you were a child I’m sure you father done the same thing so it’s a natural reaction and if I was him I’d do the same. As he said it was just a tap and that’s fine the child is not harmed or marked. Plus he said sorry so don’t make grandma so upset over something you are totally over reacting to
Children NEED discipline.
Good grief, get over it. Yes, kids need the discipline. Should be grateful they watch your child.
Oh geesh. . Get a grip…and at the age of 4 your child should no not to play with the plants anyway…he didn’t beat him he tapped his hand …your child gonna grow up to be a monster if you don’t discipline him
Your ridiculous at even thinking that. I bet he hasn’t ever touched those plants again. Do not keep your child from their grandparents. And good luck at how your raising your kids.
You are being ridiculous, with no structures discipline (ie: tapping, spanking) you child will grow up to think he is she may do whatever they please whenever because there is never any consequences to teach them otherwise. Shame on you for making Grandpa feel like that! He should not have to allow you child to mess with or do stuff (especially in there own house) that they are uncomfortable with our don’t feel the child should be touching. If No is being challenged them a tap is necessary. Shame on you for making what sounds like a great grandpa scared that his love isn’t good enough or trusted. It’s not like he picked a switch for the child or beat the living crap out of the child… your obviously a good and protective mother, but don’t get stuck in that “zone”… best of luck to all of you
Oh please. Get a real problem to worry about.
I was raised getting whipped with belts and switches. It taught me respect and didn’t hurt me. You’re over reacting 100%!!
I smacked my granddaughters ass, she ran out in a parking lot almost got hit by a car,
Asked my daughter if she rather have a dead child or one that would never do that again 
Tapped!!! Girl…unless your child knows right from wrong they need discipline. There’s a difference between abuse and being corrected. Learn it…did it cause tears or fear of the person? Did they child scream or have skin broke from the tap? No? The child is fine and you need to figure out why you’re triggered by light discipline?! Do you cuss at your child bc… well…they’ll remember verbal abuse just as bad as physical.
Oh my goodness! Totally overreacting. He tapped his hand, that’s not hitting. You and other “gentle” parents are creating an entire generation of entitled, undisciplined, disrespectful, spoiled brats who are not equipped to deal with life.
I think you are making too much of it. there is a big difference between a hand slap and a spanking. Everybody makes mistakes this would be a good way to show your child about forgiveness and 2nd chances
Smacking your child as discipline is a good thing. Time out doesn’t work. Your child will become spoiled rotten because they will grow up with no discipline. Thank God my kids are not around yours.
Don’t be overactive on this,he apologized and don’t keep them apart and punishment because it’s like your punishing both. Kid’s need grandparents love.
Honestly? He didn’t hit, he tapped. 
overreacting, it’s not the end of the world.
Definitely overreacting. Wow!
You need something to do. This is just stupid
This has to be a joke😑
Ridiculous over the top thinking
yep major over-reaction. If your not comfortable sending him then keep him with you, but if you do your depriving him of familial relationships and that’s your loss and ur child’s disadvantage
Oh please. You are worrying over nothing.
This is why your kids are disrespectful little shits because the mother dosent discipline by the sounds of this so he got a wack on the hand big deal keep your hands off other peoples things then you wont grow up to expect the world to hand you things on a platter,
Teach your child not to touch the plants and Grandpa won’t have to.
How ridiculous can you be?! A slap on the hand now, could later prevent a serious injury. What about sticking something in an outlet; running with a knife or scissors?! Learning ‘no’ is a life saver to kids. They hurt themselves on a playground more than a slap on the hand. Some parents should never be parents. If you love them…you will scold them!
I’d say it’s a BIT over reactive, but I totally understand your point. Give it another go and see how it plays out. I’m sure your son will be excited to go to grandparents house again 
Ok so you have to realize that your grandparents grew up during a different time. If he just tapped your child on his hand, didn’t flat out smack him, just a tap; you’re overreacting. He said it was just a cut reaction basically and he even told you about it and sounds to me he’s extremely sorry he did it because he obviously knows your views. I think you should let it go.
Yes I believe u r overreacting. It’s not a hit as u explained was a tap. He has the child’s best interest at heart. You also need a to speak with your child that when at anyones home if they ask not to do something they need to listen and stop.
Quit overreacting and be happy they want to watch them or spend time with them! It was just a tap! Grow up!
You’re over reacting
You would be doing much more harm to your child by depriving your child of his grandparents
You are making a mountain out of a molehill.
Hahaha I still do it to mine but guess what, I love them all to their very core. I will never ever regret having them with me. Yes, they remember how nana walloped their asses after 3 warnings. You keep them away and you will stop them from having great memories regardless. Disciplinary measures in my days were definitely a lesson learnt but I spent most ofy years around my grandfather on my dad’s side and my grandmother on my mum’s side. Iwentt back to look after grandmother in her final years and my grandfather died when I was 15. I wish I could go back to being with them again. They are the two.most treasured memories of my life.
If your child is 4 and had to be repeatedly told not to touch a plant then clearly he needed corrected. Maybe you need to be reevaluating your discipline methods so your 4 year old understands. My son is hard to redirect, but I would not be upset over a “tap”
Sounds like you need to start being a parent!! Discipline is a necessity!
OMG. ARE YOU FOR REAL!!! Thank you Sandy Sloan Grinstead
I think you’re overreacting.
But did he stop after he was “tapped” 
Obviously YOU have not found ‘other ways’ for your four year old to listen otherwise the tap would not have been necessary. Tell his grandparents all the creative ways that you get him to listen without any strict discipline and see how that works for everyone.
So glad to read so many others are in agreement that we are raising the future generations to be such self centered, entitled and yes, I will say it, BRATS!!
I wish you luck in your ‘gentle’ ways. You will need it.
You should grow a pair of balls and get over yourself
Yes, you’re overreacting!!! It’s a big difference between a tap & a beating. Don’t make your grandparents suffer because of your insecurities.
Yes you are over reacting
Overreacted and nothing wrong with a tap on the hand.
4yo he should know better and should listen when told no
He did the right thing.
Overreacting. I wonder how many times he tried to tell the kid to stop before he tapped?