When in a relationship and living together, is it ever ok for your partner to spend the night out (without notice)?
Nope they should at least respect you enough to say something to you
Absolutely not! If I’m aware it’s fine but don’t make me wonder where you are
There’s a lot of grey in that question…
I used to get upset if he’d go out and without notice end up not home afterwards, but only because I never knew if he was safe wherever he was.
I only ask for communication.
If you mean at someone’s home after work or whatever, nah that shit wouldn’t fly with me. No reason then to not come home to your babies.
No, they should at least let you know where they are and what’s going on. Doubt they would be understanding if you did the same.
I prefer to know things, hate wondering, or hearing about it later. its a 2 way street you tell me, I tell you and vice versa. But don’t expect me to tell you if you don’t tell me. I hate double standards and don’t deal with them well.
My husband doesn’t do this and he’d straight up have a stroke if I did, so I’ll say no.
If they want to worry the crap out of you!
I gotta say, if you’re asking this question to a forum of strangers, it’s probably not a good thing you’re asking about. Some of the stuff people ask on here absolutely blows my mind and reaffirms my own relationship for myself.
That’s a big hell no from me
Don’t let him be a hypocrite. If he wouldn’t like you doing it (guaranteed) then he shouldn’t be doing it either.
No they should let you know and I’m sorry but if a female did that while dating somebody every one would flip out but nobody bats an eye if a guy does it
Sounds like a conversation needs to be have concerning parameters of communication
Communication is key in an relationship.
Sadly, a lot of people like to think of things like this as controlling when in truth, it is all about respect and understanding.
If your partner respected you, they would have told you. I can understand that things happen accidentally, but if this was truly done planned and/or on purpose, it is definitely not okay.
Mine ain’t spending the night anywhere even if I know. Let him try that shit. Guess I’m spending the night too
I would say it depends on the situation. If he trashed and at a friends house and tells me at the last minute im good with it.
If he didnt let me know at all not acceptable
No it’s disrespectful I snap when it happens
No it’s disrespectful I snap when it happens
Communication is always the number one most important thing in any healthy relationship so no
Honestly I understand they’re adults and you’re not their mother but when you’re in a serious relationship it’s important to be open and honest with our significant other and if they get offended then they don’t respect you and are probably doing things they shouldn’t be doing in a serious relationship.
No. No explanation should even be needed for my answer.
Not unless you are fighting. and then it better be at his mom or sisters house. jk.
If he let me know he was safe/ok. Mine has gone out and decided to stay with mates rather than trying to get back drunk. He would possibly tell me not to stay up/worry then I wouldn’t expect contact. He has got stuck and not been able to let me know. Just explain you’ll worry if they don’t just text to say they won’t be back.
First of all,your not married. You should be talking to your partner. If you have trust in the relationship what’s the big deal? Your not their Mother,they are an adult right?!!
I’d be upset he could have at least reached out he wasn’t coming home that night so you didn’t worry
If you all cannot communicate in a healthy way about stuff, there’s already a problem.
never unless it’s a a family members home or with family members on vacation
Hell no we can’t all go he dont go
Sharon Healy what do you think haha
Well since it says without notice, no, I’d be pissed. People in a relationship should be able to communicate. It’s disrespectful not to tell your partner if you’re not coming home. You don’t necessarily have to ask for permission but it’s a respect thing so they dont worry about your safety.
No he should let you know. It doesn’t matter if you aren’t married. You are in a relationship and you should know where he is when he doesn’t come home so you wont be worried or call the cops. Like all he has to do is call or text and be like hey I’m ok. I’m staying the night at so and so’s. If he won’t tell you where he’s staying then that’s suspicious and hints at other things going on. There shouldn’t be a problem with him staying at a friends or family members as long as that person doesn’t usually get him in trouble lol. But its important to let your partner know so they dont freak out.
Depends on the situation. I’d talk to him about it. But if my husband goes out and drinks I’d rather him stay where hes at than drive home drunk and risk his life and the lives of those around him. I trust my husband. (side note…theres A LOT of nasty, insecure women in this comment section. Dont project YOUR trust issues onto others.)
No… not even with notice
As long as they let me know they’re safe idc where they stay. I trust my partner whole heartedly.
If you are sharing your life with someone else, basic respect dictates that you let them know where you’re going to be .
Why would you want your partner to worry like that? That lets doubts get in their head.
Never in 23 years I had to worry about where my husband was!!
Wow yall are married to a bunch of toddlers. My husband’s a grown man he can do what he wants when he wants. Out of respect for our relationship though he clears things with me first.
My husband does but its a culture thing. He just tells me where he ends up.
No and your are dumb for even asking this question. What is wrong with people on this page. All of this is common sense. If you have to ask it’s already wrong. Good Lord!! If my husband or significant other even tried it they would be gone. Why is this a question? Hell no!
It’s kinda odd…unless he’s drunk and can’t drive which I’m gonna come get you anyways so I’d say no it’s weird and we’re grown and you’re not sleeping anywhere but yo house, but idk what grown man wouldn’t want to come home to his partner
I’m the most easy going wife . And hard no!
Unless I know he’s having a boys night and he calls and is like “ I’m too drunk to drive can you come get me” and I can’t he just stays at buddy’s camp and that doesn’t bother me…… but like missing? I have no idea where he is? Ahhhhh hell no hah
No. There should always be communication so both parties in the relationship know each other feels safe and secure.
I hardly ever know where my man is. Unless he thinks I need something, then he will call and ask. For the most part, I know he goes to work and the store when I need something. Other than that, who fucking knows. Lol
I mean, out of respect, I’ve never stayed the night somewhere, where my spouse didn’t know where I was. And vise versa. We have been together 9 years. But every relationship is different.
Nope. If someone didn’t respect me enough to at least let me know where they’re staying the night at, I wouldn’t want to be with them.
I say no. Relationships need open and honest communication. I don’t worry because my man tells me everything. If he was to clam up, then there’s problems and trust issues.
No - this question shouldn’t even have to be asked
That’s a big negative
Geez all you women must not have trust in your husbands. There could be a very logical explanation like he’s too tired to drive or he’s drunk. As long as my boyfriend tells me where he’s at and why he’s staying somewhere for the night that’s fine. But if there’s other things the guy is doing like hiding his phone from you than hell no
Someone sent this to me… I think it’s relevant.
Uhh… we have children. It’s not just reasonable and respectful that he show up after work, it’s important for our safety. I need to know what he’s doing and he needs to know what I’m doing, because not being in communication puts our safety (to a lesser extent) and the safety of our children (to a greater extent) at risk. Communication is key to not leaving your kid at karate for 2 days, and… other important stuff…
Depends on where it is…moms house no problem.
I suppose it would depend on the situation. There have been times my SO will stay out until the morning hours at his friends house. They do this very rarely and have been best friends since 2nd grade, the whole group of them. Many times I would go and hang out too, so I already know what he is up to over there and I don’t get offended if he wants to go over there every so often. There is always a heads, at least a week to a few days ahead of time though, usually starts with BBQ or cook out notice that turns into playing pool and drinks in the man cave all night, so I let him do his thing. If he was out somewhere I didn’t know with someone I didn’t know, I may feel different. Especially with no heads up, I would be worried more than anything!
Not unless that’s how it goes for both of you
Is this really a question?
Why would he not tell you? It would be understandable if he was at his parents. Other than that, not okay.
No. Not if he didn’t communicate at all and you were up all night worrying. If he contacted you and said I’ll be out all night or staying at his friends house or something as long as it didn’t disrupt previously agreed upon plans I would be fine with it.
Depends on the situation.
No way if thats the case there’s the front door
If my husband didn’t come home, there would be a search party out there looking for him…and if he wasn’t dead or hurt in the hospital, or arrested for some messed up reason…all his shit would be out in the yard once I found out he just didn’t feel like coming home. Nah…fuck that.
I have no issues with him staying at certain places. Going to our friends house for a guys night? Have fun and most importantly be safe! If you’re too lit and need to sleep it off I’d be pissed if you came home. I get to have girls nights and stay at my friends homes so why shouldn’t he? We communicate with one another though
They should inform u and u them if they plan on being out all night
No Not unless it goes for the both of you
Not without a phone call and my phone went flat is not acceptable everyone has phones and chargers these days
Absolutely not, if he doesn’t tell u where he is he’s obviously up to no good!!!
Out of respect he should be telling you were he’s going
I mean they shouldn’t have to ask our permission but definitely needs to be communicating these things. Id be furious
Well…depends…99% of the time I’d be super pissed…but as someone with hard partying pals, I can see a pass out happening. Better than a dead spouse who chose to drive home…
Ehhh id need more info really… Just kinda depends were they partying with buds? Family? History of infidelity?
Just depends really. Should call and let you know. But at same time. Being with friends drinking a little to much, I would rather be mad at the moment then grieving for years.
No I would be upset i would worry all night. It’s disrespectful.
I agree with everyone saying it just depends. I have had a night out with friends and got too drunk and crashed at my friends house and didn’t let my hubby know because I was too drunk and too tired to do so. He wasn’t happy but he was glad I chose to stay rather than drive.
Depends on the situation. I would not want my partner to drive home drunk…it would definitely depend on who’s house my partner stayed…best friend, family member…you have to have trust AND you always know/ find out if they cheat…if you can’t trust them why have them…you don’t need them as a partner
It’s not about permission or trust, it’s about respect and communication. A quick text or phone call saying he’s had too much to drink and is staying where he is just shows common courtesy if I’m expecting him home.
No. A partner always needs to communicate. Without it, there can be no trust. And without telling you, you could be up worrying which is very inconsiderate of them. As for people saying its better if they stay after too much to drink, all it takes is a simple text, even if it doesnt make sense, you can usually tell and be like ok, theyre drunk they cant drive
Idk to each their own but my husband and I always know where each other is especially if we are not home overnight.
No. It’s common courtesy to let your partner know you’re not coming home.
Uh not without saying anything? Like you’d be thinking they are dead in a ditch somewhere?
I’d certainly be questioning the sh*t out if that … lol
If a common courtesy call was not made. My bags would be packed or his would be .either way it is clear the respect is not therem
No my boyfriend gave me his location (not because I asked for it) but so if anything happened I wouldn’t have to worry or not be able to find him
Short answer no, long explanation NO! I drive truck over the road and I talk to my wife every day and always tell her where I am sleeping that day!
Not without a phone call First
Sure!!! And when he comes home I will have his stuff boxed so be easier for him stay there the next night.
That’s where trust comes in
Is this a serious question? Because if it is,hell no!
To each his own but in my household it’s a no
Depends on the situation, mine goes out drinking sometimes with friends and then passes out at there house and comes home around 3:00 in the morning
Wouldn’t trust a man if he did
No, It is very thoughtless to make your partner worry needlessly.
Be ready for all kinds of this if you choose this to be ok!!
No no at all, you chose to live together need to have some respect n let your partner know where you will be n why not coming home
Slaves were liberated yonks ago. Atleast he wont come home pregnant.
No…it’s really rude and disrespectful to make your partner worry needlessly
Not without prior notice
U should always let ur partner know!!
Uh no,not unless theres an emergency,because im gonna think one of 2 things youre dead somewhere or messin around somewhere
I would be very upset but that would be EXTREMELY out of the norm in our household. For him or me to spend the night away not pre-planned.
I agree that my feelings would vary situationally. My gut tells me though that based on the tone of the question for whatever reason there seems to already be some underlying distrust there.
No, not unless it was an emergency