children come first.
if you dont like that, dont date a man with a “kid”.
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Selfish fu*k his child will always come before you props to him for not messaging your selfish ass back while hes with his baby spending time with them by rights he should fob you off because clearly he isnt the man for you😤
No, this guy is a jerk. He is probably screwing his kid’s mom and that’s why he won’t talk to her when he “has his kid.” It’s super messed up he didn’t do anything for her for Xmas. She needs to trust her instincts and bail on this dude. Parents are just as capable of using phones as anyone else. If your in a relationship with someone you have to figure out how to include them and care about how they feel.
I have support for the boyfriend. He would do better with a woman who appreciates the fact that he is there for his child. Shame on you. I don’t shame you for wanting attention in the relationship so much as being jealous of a freaking 4 year old! Find a guy that doesn’t have kids and maybe you’ll get more attention. He would do better with a partner in a relationship that will love his child and be more than happy he has his daughter than this.
MY 
kid comes before MY husband. MY STEP SON comes before MY husband. And vice versa. OUR kids come before each other.
Your child comes first. Always. The fact this bothers you tells you it’s time to grow the hell up. Maybe get a man with no kids.
Children come first. Your an adult! He needs to take care of his child of you can’t understand that you need to only date men with no children. How would you like to have your dad’s new girlfriend to throw a fit when he came to see you.
His child should come FIRST, if you can’t accept that maybe you need to reconsider your relationship and date someone who has no kids, you sound jealous of his girl…
So u r mad because he is a good father and devoting the time he has with his child to actually spending his time and giving her his attention , your a selfish person , please leave him he deserves better
I see both sides of this…
I understand your frustrations of feeling ignored, but the question is, why aren’t you making time for the three of you to spend together?
If the two of you had a child together, would you still feel like he’s ignoring you spending time with your child??
If you care for this man, you gotta be there for the baby too. 🤷
Lots of success stories are floating around Facebook where the adults made it about the CHILD, you can marry this man and have your own family, and still include his oldest Child. 🤷
If that happens depends on YOU.
Oh HELL no. Leave that man alone. His kid will always be more important than some girlfriend. 
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Good job dad, fuck these hoes lol
Sounds like he’s an amazing father. What a wonderful quality in a man 
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Your right, end it. Your the dick
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His child is important and probably takes up most of his time however… He should still be able to text and / or call. You might want to rethink this relationship.
U need to move on and find a man with no kids …i applaud this father he sounds GREAT
His child comes first always you shouldn’t feel jealous or insecure over a child if you do then perhaps your not ready to take on a ready made family just saying not being hurtful or anything it just sounds like insecure to me also I should add I’m a stepmom to 2 children from my husband side but he came into my life I had 4 then we had 2 of our own it was rough at times but hey 30 years later we are still together so f you love him you’ll make it work if not let him go and you look elsewhere good luck
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I think you should be happy that he wants to spend time with his child. That’s a sign of a good man. He’s most likely ignoring calls and texts because he wants to focus his attention on her. I feel like you should support their relationship. Children need good fathers. Don’t come between that relationship. As an adult, you can deal. If not, move on.
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Sounds like you need to grow up. When he has his kid he/she needs to be his priority not you… you should be thankful his such a good dad to his child, not jealous of it.
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Omg!!! Is this a serious question??? His child will ALWAYS come first and you should love that about him not be jealous. If you need attention all the time maybe you should date someone that doesn’t have kids. It seems like he’s a good father and you should respect that.
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I have kids…and I dated a man like that once. It was like the time he had his kids he just disappeared. I’m all about balance. But he had his kids week on week off. So there should have still be communication. If he is only getting every other weekend I totally get not really communicating during that time. That’s 4 days a month and his children deserve his full attention during that time. I honestly need a little more to go on here but if after 10 months you havent met his children I’d be curious where the relationship is actually going. At about the 3 month mark or 6 month is where I’m at the introduce to kids stage…if I’m not it’s a break up. 10 months is a relationship and the time when you start to blend your lives.
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I think you sound very selfish. He deserves someone who appreciates that when he has his child she has his full daddy attention. You even said it’s only when he has his daughter that he doesnt give you attention. That’s because YOU ARE NOT HIS NUMBER 1 PRIORITY WHEN HE HAS HIS DAUGHTER. SHE IS. THATS HOW IT SHOULD BE. He should break it off with you as selfish as you are. He only gets a certain amount of time with her and he uses that time wisely. You aren’t mature enough for a child. Also my husband and I never have money bbn to get eachother a gift for christmas because all our money goes to making sure the kids have a good christmas. When you’re a parent it’s about the kids not you. Please grow up
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Its not a good idea to be with a man who already has a kid because unfortunately his child will always come first. There is someone out there for you that you can have your own children with and it will be wonderful, so just be patient and your soul mate will come when you least expect it.
I think you should end it. For his sake. A child should always come first to the parents. If someone can’t understand that, then they need to be with someone with no children. If your man is putting you before his kid, do you really want a relationship with someone like that anyways. He would make a bad father to your future children
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Honestly, for you it’s probably just better dating someone without kids. It’s really hard on top of the normal stuff. You’d have to be willing to sacrifice a lot.
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I think there is more going on than just the child. Why would he not give you, his girlfriend, a Christmas card? Do you have kids of your own?A conversation should happen-soon!
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Yes. Not to be mean but his child will always be before you and it honestly doesn’t sound like you can handle that. You are trying to compete with a child for attention. Maybe try seeing if he’s ok if you all spend time together but he might feel like it’s too soon to have you around her like that
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Well it sounds like hes trying to take advantage of all the time he has to spend with his son rather than being distracted by his phone which is so easy to do… when I’m spending time with my kids I rarely get on my phone and it can be a while before I ever respond to a text… his time with his son is precious let him enjoy it.
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When I met my husband he had a 4 year old son. I loved him more because he put his child FIRST. My stepmother had my father divorce himself from his children so she could be number one. I never wanted to be that person. When we married I always made sure he maintained contact with his son. That was 40 years ago. My stepson is my friend. I’m not his mother. It works for us.
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Move on ! The CHILD comes with the Dad package deal.
10 months?!
Honey…back off please
It would be different if y’all had been together for a lot longer…but you haven’t.
Sounds to me like he doesn’t get to spend as much time with his daughter as he does with you and probably just isn’t glued to his phone when he has her and wants to give her all the attention he can and not be distracted from his time with his child.
You are grown and until you’ve made yourself a bit more permanent in his life…that daughter comes FIRST and you are SECOND.
He was dad before he met you and will continue to be one if you leave.
Now yes, he shouldn’t completely ignore you if he is really wanting a relationship…but don’t expect the same level of attention you get when y’all are alone when his baby is around.
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I’m sorry but you sound ridiculous. He is putting his child first, as any good father would. You’ve stated that when he hasn’t got his child that he gives you the attention you so clearly crave, so what’s the issue? Personally, I’d be thrilled about this, because it means if you and him were to have a child, you can be sure he’d be a fantastic father. I’m sorry but you sound bitter, jealous, immature and tbh probably shouldn’t be in this relationship.
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His child should come first, but zero, zip for Christmas for you? Nah…he doesn’t care.
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Move on or learn to share his time. …
That child will always be placed first in his life, as I would expect of any good Parent. You date a man with a child expect to be involved in that kids life, and often placed after his kid. The babies 4, at an age they still need their parent a great deal. You need to find someone without kids to give you the time, and attention you want. Or learn to share and get involved with his kid… get to know them.
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His kid should and will always come first. Learn to deal with it or move on.
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I think you need to move on, he may not be at a place that he can balance a relationship. And if he didn’t even get you a card for Christmas, that isn’t a he has a child thing, that is how it will always be. If you stay with him that will be your life and you deserve better.
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Kids are first. I seriously don’t understand women who think like this. Your competing with a child. Really!?
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Yes, the child should always come first but that does not mean he should neglect you or that you should accept it. Forget what these other people are saying because disregarding Christmas for you is a big deal unless it was agreed upon not to celebrate. For example, if I did not have money or time for my boyfriend, I would have had a one on one discussion about it prior to Christmas. That’s what you do when you care about another person’s feelings. Give him space when he has his child because young children can be very demanding. Do your own thing when he has his child until he’s ready to involve you. However, I honestly think after 10 months he would have at least gotten you a Christmas present. It’s the thought that counts not the cost of the present. He could have even requested a belated Christmas together or even just dinner.
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I didn’t date men with kids because I didn’t want to deal with all of that… If he is a good father, he will prioritize his time with his child period. That is the way it should be. If he has children and ignores them for a woman than he is a shitty father and man. Soo, you decide on what you want in a relationship and date accordingly… 🤷
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I think you should leave him not because of the child but because of his ignorance he will continue to ignore other occasions if he certainly didn’t give you anything for Christmas don’t expect anything in the future he is a good dad if he is with his child and bonding with him
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Grow up and leave that poor man a lot. He has to care for his child. He can not bow down to you all the time. You honestly sound really young and selfish.
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Hes focusing on his kid. As he should be. You get plenty of time. Seems that child doesnt. Dont be greedy heifer.
Simmer down folks… That’s not judgement. That’s facts!
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You’re right you do need to end it with him. I don’t think you’re cut out to be in a relationship with a person that has children. It’s not a competition it’s his child and you will never be his first priority nor should you be.
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You should be thankful he is such a great father. I see nothing wrong with him focusing on his child especially if they cant be together all time. Wouldnt you want your child to be treated in this manner given different circumstances?
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Sounds to me like he is an awesome daddy and you should take a hike. Good dads are far and few in between and you shouldnt try to come in between that.
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Get the fuck out … he’s busy raising his kid. You deserve to be treated well not like a 2nd class citizen. If it ain’t you … it’ll be some other person he’ll treat this way. If it doesn’t feel right … it’s bc it isn’t♡
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Dump him, not because of the kid, but doesn’t even consider you at Christmas?
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Why has he not included you in his relationship with the child. He wanted to call or text a quick hello, i love you, he would make time.
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His child is the most important thing in his life besides hopefully his relationship with Christ.
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Grow up he has and you have only been dating for 10 months and you make yourself sound obsessed or codependent
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You don’t sound mature enough to be dating someone with kids. This is pretty selfish.
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Kids come first sorry any good parent would put them first
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First of all sounds like a great dad to give his attentin to his child which he probably doesnt see that much ,you have to take second place if you want to stay with him ,give it time if you love him ,but his child will always come first…
His kid is his life. What you should be asking yourself is: Do you want to be a part of Thier lives? He should be putting his kid before you! If you had kids, you wouldn’t have to ask!
Maybe ask to be involved with his kid. I’m sorry but my kids come first too when I have them. I’m thankful my boyfriend understand that
In my opinion, you know the answers to your own questions. Our opinions and advice to you is nothing more than you seeking someone to agree with you, understand you and take your side, while you justify your thoughts and feelings on the subject. Its your relationship its your beliefs and only your decisions to make. If people tell you what they think or feel about it, its not really their life. Do what is best for you.
Kids should always take priority over boyfriends or girlfriends! You’re being selfish and I agree with Brenda. Get a dog.
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You probably don’t need to date a person with a child.
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I dont think you should be dating someone who has kids if you dont understand that his kid comes first… Their only young once & if he doesnt get to see him all the time he is doing right by giving him all his time. Seems to me like you need to look at yourself & why your insecure around that fact and have issues with it. Maybe its a case you dont have kids yourself? Explain it to him how you feel but I cant see it ending how you would like it to. Dating when having children is not the same as when you were a teenager & no responsibilites dating.
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He may not want his child to know that he’s dating someone. When baby mamas find out that their baby daddy is dating they become jealous and make trouble. It’s okay that he spend time with his son and not text you every other minute. When he gets ready to text you back after a long weekend with his son don’t respond. What’s good for the goose is good for the gander. People teach you how to treat them. Don’t answer your phone or text that every beckon call let him chase you if he wants you. Stay busy even if you’re not.
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Selfish… I’m not sorry his kid is always gonna come before you.
If you have kids with him,they too will come before you.
I suggest someone who has no kids.
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How many of us on this post have children? But look at how we all still have time to scroll around FB. I think her point isn’t selfish. True he needs to spend time with his child and give them his love but a quick reply here and there or at night when the child is asleep doesn’t sound that ridiculous. To me that was her point.
His child comes first…sounds kinda selfish and immature on your part…
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You should find someone without kids. The kids ALWAYS come first.
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I have a question? … how many days does he have his child out of the week? If he only gets to see his child every other weekend or some BS like that, then yes you are 100% wrong and need to let the man be with his child for that weekend and stop being jealous of a four-year-old child! Now, if he has his child 50% of the time, then I agree with you, he needs to make time for you!!
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A 4 yr old can and does keep you busy, any downtime is when she’s sleeping which time so might the dad so don’t get in a pissing match with a child, you are either going to accept him with his child, or do them both a favor and move on…imo
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Girl. Grow up a bit… If you just said when his daughter isnt around he gives you attention then why on earth are you complaining when he is with his daughter and gives you none… Honestly the best thing you can do for HIM is end it… He has responsibilities and his daughter is his main priority…
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Seriously…kids need lots of attention and love. Sounds like you are jealous of his time with his child. Kids come first
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Sorry about the christmas thing. He probably just doesn’t see a future or scared of what his daughter may think. Maybe he is trying to show his daughter that he enjoys her time so stays off phone. Also my child takes my phone often so I don’t have it most of the time.
My advice is to grow up. Not trying to be rude but his child should come first and an adult would want that for him and his child.
Maybe he is trying to give her his full attention while she is with him. You aren’t married so his first obligation is to her.
She can understand that his kid comes first without him having to completely ignoring her. There are some men out there that don’t know how to balance the two. Yes his kids should always come first but that doesn’t mean that he has to ignore her all the time. He needs to find a healthy balance
So if he only has his kid part of the time maybe you should make plans with him when he has his kid… go do something fun like the zoo or the park… that way you are getting to know both of them together and bond… his child is always gonna be a big part of his life…if you really want to be with him you’ll except all that comes with him(his kid)… And if not you should break it off now so his kid doesn’t become too attached to you.
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End it because you will never come before his daughter and you are looking for some type of commitment that he isn’t capable of giving you. Find yourself a man with no kids
Get a new man. He’s a decent dad and you don’t want that. You get to want what you want, but this man will never be that for you. Sounds like he’s going to choose his kid…every single time. I like that.
I agree that someone’s kids always come first, BUT they shouldn’t ignore you either! If they can’t find a way to make a good balance between the two of you then you should find someone else. People can have kids and still be in a healthy relationship that works for all of you, but if he completely blows you off when he has his kid then you really should find someone else
His child will always come first. No matter what. It’s a package deal. With how you worded things, break it off now. The little girl desires better.
This is his CHILD and his child should always come before you! You obviously shouldn’t be dating someone with kids.
Why aren’t you doing things as a couple with this child… that’s not cool u stay behind.vs versa!
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Is this foreal ? Pls grow up and find a person with no children
Move on. You’re not ready to date a man with a child.
Wow… Kids come 1st no matter what!!! If you can’t understand that then you need to let him go… he is doing what a normal parent will do.
His baby will ALWAYS come first. That’s how it is as a parent. Kids priorities always come before any else’s. I’d say you have a right to be a little upset but then again you are way overreacting. Just back off of him some especially while he has his child. When he doesn’t have his kiddo,then you can get your attention from him. 
You are completely selfish!!! This isn’t even up for debate. A child ALWAYS comes first. You need to move on and grow up. Sorry, not sorry!!
Nope. Not overthinking. He’s probably always going to choose his kid first. Get over it or get on with it.
From someone with kids who is dating something with a child…it’s not easy. You have to have patients and accept that you will never come first. At least not for a long time. It’s an adjustment to be with someone who has priorities that don’t always include their personal relationships. I can empathize for you. However as someone who is the person with kids I needed someone who just got it. I don’t know your age or where you are in your life but you may need someone who can make you more of his center of attention. And that is not a bad thing. Don’t let anyone make you feel bad for feeling this way but you will not get what you want from him. And it’s not fair to him as well to not have someone there who understands. Hopefully you make the best decision for yourself.
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His kid should always come first and if you have an issue with that then you need to leave
You shouldn’t have to ask.You answered your own question. Get rid of him.
Seriously! You need to give your head a wobble his kid should come first always if you can’t accept that then move on and let him find someone who understands that by the sounds of things you need to grow the fuck up!
Not to be mean but relax … children always come 1st maybe he just doesn’t wanna take time away from her
Man dont even put your self in this situation and you can do bad all by yourself I could not and would not
That is very selfish if he likes or lovesyou eventually you would b introduced to each other and then slowly invited to do things with them both yr not hearing yr own questions tlk is cheap and you my dear are self involved frivolous and sorry to say a tad spoilt to the point of being a princess shame on you for questioning his loyalty to both of you you will never b no1 and now you went viral I hope he sees this post wat a way to start 2020
I think it’s sad he didn’t even get you a card. As a single mom of two. When I dated I would let the guy know my kids come first. But…that gave me no right to disrespect this person or even ignore the person. I think you should move on. He’s not the one dear!
If you can’t understand his child comes first an a 4 yr is handful you might as well someone with out kids
This is why I put of dating after my divorce and focused on my kids for a few years. Men and women just dont get how important your time with you kids are. I improved myself and my kids got the attention they needed at the time. But to each there own. You also said there were other issues as well but didn’t go into that as much as your attention problem.
Put yourself in his shoes. What would you do if you are the one with a child?
That child needs his attention more than you do. It’s time to grow up.
Kids should always be number 1. Relationships with someone who has kids isnt for everyone
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Why are yall being so mean to her she’s trying, let’s be honest if he wanted to find time to talk to her he would it’s not that hard. Sounds like she needs to find someone that will find time and if he cares he would have bought her a gift …
U need to end it cuz when he has his kid his attention needs to on that kid if u cant respect that leave obviously he cares about you if u get his undevided attention when the kid isn’t around.