His duty is to his daughter first and foremost. Not to you. You should be grateful to have a man who puts his child as his priority. If he had a child with you, wouldn’t you want him to focus on your child and not some chick he’s only been dating for 10 months? Either be thankful you have a man that’s a good dad, or end things because you are not mature enough to be dating someone with a kid. I’m married with 6 soon to be 7 kids. My husband has not gotten me a birthday or Christmas anything in about 3 years. I’m okay with that because his focus is on the kids where it should be.
1 Like
You need someone without kids 
6 Likes
Sounds like he has priorities straight. His child comes before you or any girlfriend ALWAYS. You need to realize that. Either get used to it and accept it and stop getting hurt by it or break up with him. He deserves better than you.
2 Likes
Wow. You are one selfish person!! That is his damn child. 
1 Like
If he’s with his kid, he shouldn’t be on his phone texting you he should be present with his child. His child should always come wayyyy before you. If you can’t handle that don’t date someone with kids.
1 Like
This has to be a joke right? You’re not seriously being jealous that your boyfriend gives his OWN CHILD more attention than you…right? Grow up
6 Likes
Seriously, it’s his kid.
Let’s be 100 here, some guys only get 1 weekend a month. He should be giving his undivided attention to the child.
If you cant handle that, yes, move on. You’re not strong enough in who you are to make plans and have a life without being joined at the hip.
After kids, it’s not abt you.
3 Likes
A child comes before ANYONE. I mean idk what to tell you, his kid is gonna come before you…
2 Likes
Yeah you need to end it. You need to date someone without kids. Seriously. Of course he gives his child his attention. 
1 Like
His child should come first. He’s being a good Dad. I would honestly say that you need to find a man who doesn’t have children. On top of that, if you can’t stand sharing the spotlight, find a man who never wants to have kids. Kids take time & attention.
3 Likes
WOW!!! Please grow up! 
you’re a grown ass woman worried that a mans 4 year old is getting more attention than you? Please! 
What exactly are you mad about? The fact he’s trying to be a good dad when he has his son? Hell either accept that or find a guy with no kids. Sounds like you’re not understanding he’s a package deal and he’s aware of that which is why it sounds like he’s only committing himself to his son right now.
1 Like
It sounds like you don’t have kids of your own… kids always come first. They also take up so much time of your day you’re constantly back and forth doing this and that for/with them. I’m a stay at home mom and sometimes I don’t reply to texts from my HUSBAND for hours at a time because I’m picking up toys, fixing a snack, reading books to him, playing super hero’s, whatever it is it usually keeps me from replying for long periods of time. And yes my situation is different, it’s both of our child and we’re married but the big point of this is that children take up a lot of your time literally all your spare time so if you can’t handle that I think you need to leave.
2 Likes
It’s his child honey. It’s not like he lives with his child. So he probably wants to spend as much time as he can w his kid. So I’m sure it’s kinda difficult to not hear from him as you normally do. It’s not like he’s out at a club ignoring you.
Am I reading this right?! 
hunny she is his daughter! You are just a girl he’s seeing. No one, and I mean no one will be more important in this world then his daughter. Get off your high horse. If you need that much attention you need to find someone with no kids so you can be treated like one. But don’t ever date a dad again because if you make him choose between you and his kid his kid will win.
5 Likes
I think we can all agree the Christmas thing is messed up, but you definitely need to be with someone that doesn’t have kids
How are you jealous of his kid dude that kid was in his life way before you, I would hope you’re joking cause that’s pathetic what you just wrote
2 Likes
She will always be the most important girl in his life, as she should be. Get over yourself and grow up!
3 Likes
You need to do them a favor and bounce. You are not meant for them. The fact that you are getting jealous of a child and the dad’s time is a sign. I would not want a relationship with anyone like you if I were the man bc my child comes first always. If I were you though, I’d be happy to find a guy who has his priorities straight bc it shows what kind of father he would be to my children too. A dedicated one. And that is a beautiful and admirable quality. That being said, you’ve already shown where you stand so let them go.
7 Likes
You arent ready for a man with a kid 
i hope he realizes this too
1 Like
Wow. So you’re going to leave a person who is obviously a good dad because he doesn’t give you his attention 24/7? You’re willing to “work with him” yet you aren’t wanting anything to do with his child? Is it because he won’t let you or is it because you don’t want to? If you don’t want to be with someone who has a child plain and simple don’t be! My husband and i got together when I had 2 children and do you think I just ignored my kids for him? Nope! I told him from the start my kids are first and he was okay with that. He also was a very big part in their lives and has been since day 1. I wouldn’t want my kids to be around someone who wanted my undivided attention over me taking care of my kids. It sounds like it’s time to grow up or move on to someone who doesn’t have children. And if you’re in this group obviously you have children so do you choose this man over your kids?
2 Likes
She’s asking for advise not to be shamed or bashed regardless if your views differ…
If this is the first time you are dating someone that has a child you need to realize the child should always come first. It’s hard for someone that hasn’t went threw having a child to understand that once you have children they are your whole world nothing else matters. I had children before most of my friends and they didn’t fully understand why I couldn’t do certain things or stay in touch as much until they had children themselves… most apologized once they had children they were like “I’m sorry now I get it”
If he only sees his daughter every other weekend and one day durning the week then he should be giving her his undivided attention. Use those times for you to hang out with your friends and family:
Also be thankful he is such a focused dad because if your relationship continues and you two have children wouldn’t you want him to be this focused on your child?
Also you need to think it takes time to fully form bonds with people you guys have been together 10 months he has know his daughter for 4 years. She’s also a part of him… Give things time maybe as time goes on you will become a part of their world 
and be included in things.
As for the Christmas present thing. Never give a gift expecting anything in return. Give a gift to someone to see the look in their eye spread joy and happiness expecting nothing but a thank you.
I hope my advise helped.
Good luck
4 Likes
You should be commending him for being an amazing father instead of being upset that hes not giving you attention… you said yourself when he doesnt have his kid you get all the attention you need…dont be jealous of his child! His child came before you and when you started dating him you knew he had a kid so you accepted the package deal!! Take a step back and ask yourself this…if you had a child whose father was a great father and his girlfriend was asking this question…how would you feel??? If you cant accept his kid comes first then you need someone without children.
You ladies are awful…
After 10 months of being together, it seems like he should be making more of an effort to include you in time with his daughter. I’ve been a single mom for almost 10 years, and my boyfriend has been a single dad for almost 5. And yes, our children are obviously important, but so is our relationship and anyone who doesn’t realize that is very likely not happy in their own relationship. I’m not saying leave him, but I would definitely address it with him and see if maybe there’s a reason for his behavior.
3 Likes
I hope he leaves you. He deserves better than someone that clearly don’t accept his child.
This sucks but …
He’s just not that into you. Period.
Million of parents around the world can find time to text their significant other, even when they have their kids.
Him ignoring you and ‘ghosting’ you is a red flag. A HUGE one.
Are you wrong for demanding attention during his daughters visits? Probably. Honestly after 10 months you think he would bring her around during visits but to each their own.
Are you wrong for expecting normal interactions during visitations? Absolutely not. He’s low-key gaslighting you it sounds like.
Bottom line is he’s not that into you, and you are acting a little immature. You are never going to be happy with him so cut your losses and run
1 Like
He’s giving his child his undivided attention, isn’t That a good thing??
I think you asked thr wrong group of ladies. Lmao. That kid WILL ALWAYS come before you. Point blank period
2 Likes
Well you sound like a crazy person and should probably not date someone with children since you’re still a child yourself.
2 Likes
His child is wayy more important than a girl he’s been with only 10 months. Just leave, you aren’t meant for them.
1 Like
Life is too short. If you think it’s time to end it do it. You shouldn’t have doubts in a relationship. Move on and find someone worth your time and efforts.
2 Likes
Girl shut up. Kids come first. He needs to leave you.
13 Likes
That’s a man you Keep hold of one who has his priorities straight children before women!
Yeah kids come first 100%, deal with it or go find someone without kids, cause that kid will always get attention while hes got them.
1 Like
You can answer the phone with a child. I say LEAVE!!!
Not to sound rude but is this a serious question? Disappointment about no gift or card for Christmas is one thing but whining about not getting attention or enough attention while he’s being a responsible adult for his own child whom he doesn’t get to see 24/7? That’s super childish. Do you have any idea how many men put women before their own kid? It’s astronomical and in reality sickening. If you want to be included then discuss it with him. Maybe he’s not ready to merge his child’s life with yours yet. Maybe he wants to spend every moment he can get with his kid without distractions. You should absolutely respect that and if you can’t then you should break it off with him. You are absolutely going to have to share his attention. That will never change even if you are more included in the child’s life. Never the less, either discuss it with him and ask how you can be included more, respect him and his need to focus on his child while he has her or leave and find a man who doesn’t have a child.
10 Likes
Now that is an amazing dad, paying full attention to his kid. You should LOOK for that in a man, not be jealous 
5 Likes
Yo get over yourself. If you can’t appreciate the fact that a MAN is putting HIS CHILD before you, then you deserve to be with a piece of shit. I hope he comes to his senses and leaves your ass.
Honestly just get over it. The kids always come first. I ignore my husband when he’s right next to me if my son needs me
1 Like
Let’s not do this:
His child was here before you and will definitely be here after you… as a woman, step back and admire the relationship he has with his child, and find you something to do when they are together. Eventually, when you are up for it (because you seem almost jealous now but ) try to mention doing things and outings with the child as a couple.
4 Likes
Kids come before anyone. Sounds like he’s doing the right thing. In my opinion you should be happy he’s not a dead beat dad, but he should’ve at least gotten you something for Christmas.
1 Like
Who are you again? Damn sure not his kid, and you damn sure won’t be his wife with that attitude. Thank you next.
OMG Grow up! A little needy are we? He is a father, that will always come first, as it should! Do him a favor, go find someone with no responsibilities!
3 Likes
I’m sorry people are being harsh with you, but he sounds like a good dad making the most of his parenting time. If you decide to stay with him, I hope you can find something enjoyable to do during his parenting time. Not getting you anything for Xmas was terribly hurtful! You may need to spell that out for him as he sounds as dumb and selfish as most guys are in that area. If he discounts your feelings then maybe he’s not boyfriend material.
1 Like
Can’t even with this. Bye bitch.
I agree with everything a lot of these ladies are saying. But, I was in a situation like this and found out he was still involved with the child’s mom…
The Christmas present is understandable I would be a bit offended too but if you’re not making any effort with his child too then why would he buy you anything? It sounds like you’re more of a “when I feel like it” kind of person for him and that’s not any better than what you are doing.
kids will always come before anyone or anything, well at least to most folks, as everyone said, time for you to move on if you can’t understand that, this is his daughter, he doing what he should be doing, Being A DAD!
1 Like
You should be thankful that your boyfriend is a good dad. I honestly can’t believe you would even see this as an issue. When you have kids, you’re on their agenda and you do what the child wants and needs leaving barely any time to do anything else. The fact that you see that as a problem is pretty disturbing. There’s plenty of time when he doesn’t have his child for you. I would leave. You’re not meant for him AND his child.
1 Like
U cant really expect to come before someone’s child right?.. I mean he should go got u a gift but if u expect to be more important than his child u should leave
3 Likes
Children come first. Period.
3 Likes
It also sounds like you’re in high school or something. Sounds like you’re extremely jealous of the “kid” which by the way to me sounds very bad for some reason. I would be calling her his daughter because that’s what she is and I’d consider her to be my daughter as well at that. But you obviously don’t
4 Likes
He’s being a father. This should be commendable behavior from him. If you feel like this isn’t appropriate behavior, then maybe you need to reevaluate yourself.
1 Like
He has a child, children come first. If you cant respect that, do his daughter a favor and remove yourself. You aren’t worthy of someone with kids! 💁
2 Likes
If roles were switched everyone says to mom to make her kids above anything else. So why is it wrong that dad does the same
4 Likes
He sees you as temporary.
Why do you think you should be more important than the child? Children always will be more important than a spouse
4 Likes
Just leave boo. You’ll never get the attention you want because good dads always put their kids first.
4 Likes
So this woman is mad because her man loves his child, his child is the most important person I the world to him. Mad because hes being an amazing dad to his child. This woman does not deserve anybody if she cant deal with 2nd to his own flesh and blood.
3 Likes
Well, he gets limited time with his child. His child comes first, regardless. You need to give him space when he’s with her…you are not #1, she is.
3 Likes
I am going to be as polite about this as possible. What he is doing is the sign of a good father. This is the kind of thing any mother would want to see in a potential mate. You are in a mother’s group, so I would have to guess you are a parent. You should be prioritizing your child before him. It goes both ways. If you want a man that doesn’t care for his child or yours to give you attention, then you need to reset your priorities. You shouldn’t be putting yourself in competition with a child.
3 Likes
Sounds like he’s still involved with the baby mama
3 Likes
He’s a good dad, sure he’s supposed to be so no cookies for that, but he can’t text or returns phone call? I call BS, that kid doesn’t need 24/7 attention. Children sleep. Not a thought at Christmas? Real men can prioritize so that being said, he’s probably just not that into you. I know that sounds harsh but move on. Go make your own family and find a man who’s child is yours and then all of these issues will be moot.
3 Likes
I can understand that you want his attention. But if he doesn’t get his kid every day then giving her his undivided attention is important… there could be underlying issues that prevent him from including you in this special time… I have not yet let my kids meet my boyfriend and it’s been over a year. I need to know he’s in this 100% because boyfriends and girlfriends come and go but our kids are forever
2 Likes
wow!! sorry but you knew he had a child before you got with him!! his child comes before anyone even himself get over it
1 Like
Children are always going to come first in a relationship with a good parent. But at the same time, they have put in 6 months of being together so I don’t think if he called or texted you it would deprive the little girl out if her dad’s time. The question I’m wondering is do you attempt to do things with the two of them? If not I think it’s time to end it.
1 Like
It’s shitty woman like you that get jealous and jealousy grows to ultimately giving him an ultimatum and making the child feel unwanted. I hope he leaves your unworthy ass. Him and his daughter deserve better and not a needy jealous of a child bitch.
A bit of a narcissist, are we?
1 Like
Date someone without kids or get used to being number 2. His baby will always come first and you should be happy that he’s not a dead beat dad. That says a lot about a man. If you can’t give him time with his daughter then you need to move on. Maybe instead of being upset that he is with his child support the fact that he spends time with her and do something for yourself for that time. You shouldn’t be upset that you barely have been dating this guy and he puts his daughter first. I’d be impressed if I was dating a guy like that. My husband has always known that my kids come first. Even with my first born who is not his… he knows they are my world and would never come between that. And although it may be hard for you to understand what that’s like not being a parent put yourself in his shoes… come from a place of understanding. She is not a competition, she is a little girl who needs her daddy. If you can’t understand that then you need to leave. And I would be wondering why you haven’t met her yet if you have been together for ten months… maybe this is not the relationship for you.
2 Likes
Damn straight he better give that baby more attention he also probably bought his CHILD GIFTS instead of you which isn’t a bad thing either you’re mentality isn’t old enough for a man with children if this is how you feel
His babygirl comes first and he is proving this to you. Which is good. You need to move on bc you will never be in the place you want with his attention.
You aren’t, will never be, and should NEVER be more important than his child… I actually find it amazing he “shuts off” the world a little and puts his phone down while being with his child. It’s important for the child.
3 Likes
It sounds like you’re not willing to share and that’s perfectly alright. My boyfriend told me up front he didn’t want children ever. He made a point NOT to date anyone who had children because he wanted to be the priority. Is it selfish or make him a prick? Perhaps to some but I didn’t see it that way. I was more impressed by his honesty. FYI when we started dating he broke one of his rules for me. My son was 17, they became the best of friends and still are today, my son is almost 26 today. Nobody should fault you if dating someone with child isn’t what you want…you might want that later if the right person comes along. As for now, if you can’t handle the situation of him being a great Dad, you need to WALK. He’s being a great Dad. That’s a great quality that someone else will surely appreciate. By the way, not getting you a gift was insensitive. You’re allowed to be hurt over that.
If he’s a good father. You will never come before his child. Grow up girl. You sound like u need to be with a little boy with no kids.
2 Likes
You’re garbage. How are you going to be upset because he pays more attention to his child. It’s his flesh and blood. You will never come before his child. You dont deserve to be involved in his child’s life. Date someone without kids if you’re gonna be bitching about attention
…um do him a favor and leave him. You’re so wrong for him if you’re jelous of his daughter!!!
4 Likes
I think you know it’s time to abort that mission with him
There’s a reason you’ve felt like ending it before, not even a card and u got presents for them 
Sounds like he’s a good dad who has his priorities straight. Kids come first kudos to him for putting down the phone and spending quality time with his child
1 Like
You need to leave since you cant control your jealousy. It seems like he doesnt see his kid so you need to get over it.
If he is a good dad his kid will and SHOULD always come first. If you cant deal with that get out now.
1 Like
His kid comes first. No if buts or maybes. If you can’t accept that. Leave
2 Likes
Sounds rough. While the child should always come first and on his visit they should be having good uninterrupted time after 10 months this time should also be more balanced to include you. If he isn’t including you I would ask him about his commitment. If he is committed and is looking to the future you will be a part of this child’s life. He has to either make the choice to include you in some way or you need to move on.
1 Like
I think some growing up is needed by the OP. Kids come first. Always. If you can’t understand that then dont be with someone who had a child.
Please leave him so he can find a grown ass woman who appreciates his love for his daughter.
Sounds like ur jealous because he is a good dad. His child comes before you. I think you need to move on. Or maybe he will break up with you soon. Because him and his child needs someone better then you in their lifes.
This is his time with his child if it any other time sure but when he at work or with his child he shouldn’t have be on ur time that his child’s time his time sry but u need to slow down and be little less clingy before he leaves guys don’t like clingy back down I find more attention and nagging u give the less u get in return guys like a catch so give him space he will msg you more when he sees ur msging less …
You need to learn to grow up and quit being a little girl. If you don’t like that he’s a good dad leave because you don’t deserve him and there’s a woman out there that would appreciate him and his child. His kids are his priority not you, you are an extra.
6 Likes
This is probably the most childish thing I’ve ever read. I would’ve looooved for my dad to put me first when he had a girlfriend, but that never happened. He’s doing what any real father should do. I think the dad should leave you, sounds like his 4y/o is more mature anyway.
2 Likes
What did I just read? Is she for real? This is a joke right
3 Likes
Children come first. Who cares that you got them gifts? Obviously you bought them expecting something in return. I’m sure you knew he had a child in the beginning. That man should be praised for being a outstanding father. When he gets his child, he wants to give her all of his time because he doesn’t have her every day. Even if he did, she would always and forever come before you. You’re giving him a fantastic reason to break up with you. I wouldn’t want you as a step mother for my child. Lol children. Come. First.
3 Likes
Leave, you are selfish, and childish. My dad was a single father and I always have and always will come first. Pffft like you even have a right to feel this way, move on. Your not good for him.
2 Likes
Kids come first. If you aren’t okay with that, find someone without kids.
When I have my 3 year old, he can be so demanding I feel like I can’t even think… let alone worry about what someone else is doing
1 Like
There is literally no time to txt or call when child comes over for parenting time
My friend thinks like u. She wants me to respond chat for hrs. Hangout when my kids are all home. Go pick her up to shop with all kids or leave them st home. Hello!! I have a newborn who freaks out when he doesnt see me for more than 1 hr. Its hectic it’s super busy. Messy house, Cooking and cleaning going to store and outings. Each child needs me and of course my man need attention too…its really annoying when she keeps telling me that I should handle my time , she misses me and keeps insisting on going on fun outings when that’s more work to do and I want to stay home and when I’m struggling to meet everyone else need for attention and I need time for me as well.
That’s what u r doing…extremely not understanding of how parenting wks.
U thinking of cutting ties…but honestly hes thinking of doing that to u…just like I told my friend I’m sorry but not sorry and my kids come 1st and theres no time for friends especially when shes calling me selfish for wanting time to myself even when the older kids r not here. He might find he doesn’t have time for a relationship.
His child probably only comes everyother weekend
Find some friends
Spend time with ur mom
Idk…but being extremely codependent destroys relationships either way
U should be proud he doesnt push his child aside just cuz he has a gf. That shows character and great fatherhood.
Although he still not ready to include u on spending with u during his parenting time🤔
And he spent all his money on getting his child gifts that probably why he didn’t get u any. Or does t celebrate xmas. Received ur gifts tho to be nice.
I think u should end it. Date someone who doesnt have kids
That’s ur match
1 Like
Oh yea he’s awful for being SUCH A WONDERFUL DAD. He should leave you for thinking you should come above his child.
3 Likes
I’m saying this in the nicest way I possibly can…you need to go. He makes you a priority, but not when his daughter is around? Honestly, what do you expect? You will understand one day when you have children of your own, your kids come first!
3 Likes
Yep. You should end it. You’re wasting your time hoping he’ll change.
1 Like
You should definitely leave him ASAP
He and his child deserve way batter
Do you even hear yourself and how stupid you sound?
You’re jealous of HIS CHILD and you’re toxic af
6 Likes
Ew getting jealous of his 4 yr old is GROSS! You need to leave that man alone.
4 Likes
As a single mum I wish my daughter father was half of the man this man is…the fuck? Seriously…my bf knows my child comes first…he has no children but he loves my daughter as if she is his own…that’s how it’s supposed to be…wow just wow…
I don’t know him but it sounds like he’s doing what he should be. His child should come before you, not to be rude but it’s true. He will always have his daughter and that is the main relationship he needs to invest in. Plenty of men put a woman before their own kids and that is wrong. I understand your frustrations but he’s doing what he is supposed to. Y’all have only been together 10 months so maybe he is testing you to see how you handle him giving his daughter his full attention when she’s with him. Just be patient and understanding and realize that he is doing what any good dad should be doing and respect that or leave him and find someone who doesn’t have kids.
4 Likes