Sorry general question have you got children?
I’m 22 I have two children one 4 year old and a one year old and they are a full time commitment, children take alot of time because they need it quiet frankly I think your being selfish yes he ignores you when hes with his child but when hes not you get his full attention, his child sees him on a part time basis and so it’s right he should give her all his attention hes making up for the time he dont get to see her
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…alone time with his kid…get over it. My boyfriend lives with us and hell yeah he ignores me after work to spend time with his daughter…its being a good dad. I hardly touch my phone when i have my kid
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The first red flag was when the child was referred to as “the kid”
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what you want the child to do? Sit in a bedroom or lounge while he attends to you ? Yourv been together 10months 
why the hell would he put you before his 4 YEAR OLD CHILD . Ihave a 5 year old a 22 month old and due in 5 weeks with third and even now the guy I’m trying to see only gets me at night times due to him working or me dealing with my children . He knows he never comes first but children first partner next me last 
if you cant handle that kind of lifestyle leave and don’t ever have kids .
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Kids do come first, but does he make any effort to include you when the child visits? You can always ask to plan an activity for all of you and make an effort to let the child know that you want to get acquainted and do things together. If hes not open to allowing you to do this, better to leave now.
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Do you spend time with the child at all? I am asking because if you have been together 10 months and you are not interacting with the child then there is probably baby MoMA issues, and if you have a man who is a great father and puts his child first,give him that time , especially if he’s a good boyfriend when he doesn’t have his child, but don’t ever make he feel like he has to choose! Being a good Dad is a wonderful quality in a man!
Have you considered the fact that he’s paying more attention to a child who can easily get into things that can hurt her seriously shit I’m 25 with 3 kids 7,3,&2 so yes they destroy crap if you don’t pay attention to them I’ve had my fair share of scares with my boys
Children ALWAYS come first,but he can’t get her a card ?he can’t answer a text ?this isn’t about his parenting.hes a crappy bf .
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4 year olds take constant watching. They try to accidentally kill themselves CONSTANTLY. That being said if it has been 10 months why don’t you go spend time with BOTH of them? Although if you weren’t even a greeting card thought on Xmas he might not be into you meeting his child either. I would say move on to someone without kids. If you’re high maintenance and need that much attention a guy w kids is not the right guy at all. (Not meant in a snarky way- some women need more attention than others)
If u had a child of ur own u would absolutely be doin what he is doin. He should not prioritize anyone over his child. Maybe hes not ready to include u in their time together and that should be ok, but it will get there when he feels its best.
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Hopefully he’s ALOT better dad than boyfriend…
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His child comes first. Obviously.
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Obviously hes not in to you. Leave now!!!
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Mikyla Whitfield this may not be the best example but this is the group I was talking about. They are honest w each other. Not catty but not afraid to call someone out on BS either.
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His kid comes first and that’s how it should be. And referring to the child as the kid?
If your not happy leave
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Wait… you’re really competing with a 4 year old over their father??? are you serious!? Who does that!?! What’s wrong with you that you think he should give you all his attention all the time??? That’s his damn kid!!! He doesn’t deserve a selfish person like you!! Seriously just end it because you’re not someone who should be in a relationship with a parent if you can’t handle the fact that they’re gonna ignore you for their kid:woman_facepalming:
Wow you’re a special kind of woman aren’t you. Stay single
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You guys are missing the point. He didnt get her anything for Christmas . Alot of you all would be bothered too. Also you can still call or text when you are out with your kid.
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You should end it… you sound like a child yourself. Kudos to him he sounds like a good dad putting his child before any 10 month relationship. Good luck with your next relationship
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Mom of 4 of her own and 4 step. You need to be butting out. He has a child he’s trying to spend time with her. You ovibously ain’t ready too be in a relationship with someone with a child… me and my so spilt up for eight months I ended up with someone else and he took on the responsibility of my and my so children as well. And me and my ex ended up having my last son together who is four months old. Me and my husband are back together… And he is helping raise mine and my ex’s son . I would die for my daughter’s daddy to have anything to do with her she’s fixing to be 7. Seven years he’s missed out from her life due to his girlfriend . She has a brother and sister out there the same age as her brothers from me and she so badly wants her bio dad to have something to do with her and to be able to spend time with her brother and sister… You aren’t ready for a relationship with someone who has kids clearly… While he’s trying to spend time with his daughter… There is alot of dads out there who don’t. Shame on you.
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Wow, this is beyond ridiculous, you need to tell him how you feel, so he knows hes wasting time. Fr
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I get that you want him to have the respect to reply but he’s WITH HIS KID.
And if you can’t understand that, you shouldn’t be dating someone with a child. 🤷 Are you a mom?
When I met my kids father I was not a parent, but he was. I never once felt like he should put anything on hold with his kid, to make me feel more secure. Leave the man alone. Trust me, he doesn’t have time for this immaturity.
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You my dear need to Grow up and appreciate that fact that he s stepping up and being a great daddy . You should get a hobby or a job while he has his daughter. A relationship is not all about you.
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Let me lay it out for you…
When a Dad has visitation, that time is meant for him to be focused on his child (ren). He should not be focused on you and worried about how you feel in that time.
You may have offered to spend time with both of them, but maybe he isn’t ready to introduce you into her life yet. It’s not healthy for a child to have a parent bring a bunch of girlfriends in and out of her life. Once he’s knows that the relationship is going to be long term, then he can ease you into his daughter’s life.
It sounds like you are either very insecure or you’re VERY spoiled. Either way, I would seriously suggest getting some help through therapy to learn why you are jealous of a 4 year old.
And finally, if you are not happy, I would suggest breaking it off instead of trying to worm and push your way between him and his child.
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Your complaining… because hes being a good dad? I dont understand🤦♀️
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Grow up sweetie, his kid is his number one priority. If you can’t handle that you are selfish and don’t need to be dating him.
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Psychologists and experts have said single parents shouldn’t introduce a SO unless it’s a very serious relationship or even wait to date until their kid is out of the house. It’s harder on the child to get attached to people who don’t stick around. Poster is an adult, the child is a 4yo. Act like the adult and stop being selfish. The child should be the priority. That’s being a parent. Prioritizing your child.
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His kid should ALWAYS come first, either learn to take a backseat or move on.
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Reminds me of this woman
Maybe instead of texting and calling be involved in his daughters life, it sounds like you disappear when she’s around. He clearly has split custody and loves spending time with his daughter she was in his life first, please leave him.
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Jesus! Grow up!! Or don’t date a man who has a kid… it isn’t about you! You have found one of the good ones who is there for his baby and your bitching bc he isn’t paying attention to you, you sound like a child…
If you’re dating he should have thought to give you something — I’d fade and see what he does. If nothing - keep fading… this isn’t just about his daughter I don’t thinj
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I hope he leaves you 
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My boyfriends in jail for the next 12 months and I still bought & wrapped him and his kids presents and will again next year 
It’s a bit weird he’s ignoring you though.
Um. His kid DOES come before you. If you can’t handle that then you don’t need to date someone who has kids.
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Wayy over thinking. He needs to pay less attention to you when he has his child to pay attention to them. Honestly shows he is being a good dad. Maybe show him you can step up and be a bonus mom without the title and if you cant. Leave him alone cause your waisting HIS time if you can’t accept he needs to give his child attention especially over a girl who may not be around in 10 years when his child will always be.
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Sounds like you have a massive amount of the ‘green eyed monster’ going on . Best thing you can do is leave him the fuck alone and allow him to spend his quality time with his kid (as you called her). You sound very jealous and insecure. I can see why he spends time with his daughter without you. Too needy. Why are you trying to compete with a child? Time to grow up!
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if you can’t accept his kid sis, get to walking. his time with his kid is just that, time with his kid. you shouldn’t be interfering, you shouldn’t be bugging.
if you love that man, you’d be wanting to spend time with his kid too. falling in love with a single parent is falling in love with their kids as well!!
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Get over it, he gives you attention when he doesnt have his kid but gives all of his attention to his kid when he has her, he sounds like an amazing dad which is hard to find these days, as for the present, did you guys talk and say “hey lets exchange gifts” or did you just assume? Maybe he thought it was to early in the relationship to do gifts? Or maybe he made sure his kid got gifts and didn’t have the money left, grow up and deal or go find a guy without a kid, because his kid will always come first
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Just call his child’s mother and explain to her that you are jealous of their child and you want her to stop letting the father be a father to his child. If she is as petty as you are, problem solved. 🤷 for the record this is sarcasm and my real answer is you are not ready for a relationship with this man or any man with a child. Keep messing with f#ckbois.
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You can’t maintain a relationship with someone who has kids if you either can’t or are unwilling to accept that the child ALWAYS comes first and will be the #1 priority.
And if someone isn’t doing that then you probably don’t want someone like that in your life anyway.
As for gifting, you’ll have to learn that gifts are an act of generosity that should never come with an expectation attached for reciprocation.
If you’re hurt by not receiving a Christmas gift then make sure it’s not just because you gifted and now feel owed.
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Sounds super petty and childish…the child will always come first period.
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You need to leave this man alone. Are you selfish? That man has a duty to be a father. He will always choose his son over you as it should be.
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It seems like he is at a different stage in life then you. Parenting changes things. His child will always come first. I could see why it might get annoying if he ignored you for days at a time while he has her without even a text. I don’t know. Talk to him about how you feel. You would probably be better off finding someone without kids. To feel like this this early in. And the fact he didn’t even think of you after 10 months of dating to get you something for Christmas probably says a lot about where the relationship stands. Time to move on.
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A child should always come first
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Excuse yourself from the relationship and let him be a father.
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yes you are over thinking it
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You should respect his father and child time. It’s sacred and as you say you catch up later or after. However no card etc is not a good sign. But you need to weigh up if you want to be with someone who has a child as their attention will always have to be shared. If you’re not happy now you probably won’t be in the future either. Time to move on.
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Wooooow. Please walk away. Clearly you aren’t mature enough to date someone that has a child 
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Your boyfriend should dump you
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God this is gross. His daughter comes first and that’s how it should be. You’re clearly not mature enough to handle a relationship with someone who has a child.
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I can’t imagine being with someone who doesn’t understand my children will always come first. Big yikes.
Kudos to this father for being a father 
Grow up.
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I’d choose the kid over you any day! You are reflecting red flags there hun…
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So glad that baby has a good dad that puts his child FIRST. AS IT SHOULD BE. If you can’t handle that don’t date men with children. Easy. 
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Sounds like the 4 yr old is more mature than you. You are what gives most step parents a bad name.
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His kid should always come first! Unless hes ignoring you in person with the child there I wouldnt worry… you have to let things build!
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Well honey. Sorry but my children come first. I don’t want to hurt your feelings but that what happens when you have kids.
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Is really disgusting that woman with children may I add are agreeing with her actions and calling him a crappy boyfriend.
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Bruh kids come first. Before you, before ANYTHING! Lmao i kinda hope he dumps you, he deserves better
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Hes being a good dad, alot of people keep their kids and relationships seperate until they have been together for 6 months plus. And as for a gift did you tell him you didnt expect anything and then get upset that he didnt get you anything or does he have money or time to be able or did he just forget? Do you have kids? Or are you just not handling the situation well because you dont understand his responsibility as a father?
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Omg get over yourself he has a 4 year old, 4 year olds are busy, ypu have a great man willing to guve his child 100% attention when he has her and you are jealous of his daughter!? Really? You do know you will never come before her right? She is the number one girl in his life and thats how it should be!
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This is truely petty #sorrynotsorry. I think it sounds like he is willing to split your time with him and his #1 priority- his kid. Good for him focusing on his kid when he has his kid. This is being a good parent
He is showing you attention when you two are together and it sounds like you are not willing to accept the terms of a relationship with being with someone who is a parent.
As far as the Christmas thing, maybe there is a reason he didnt do presents with you. Maybe having to focus on buying presents for his kid…gets expensive when they are young buying presents from the parents and then from santa, just saying .
That was your choice to buy them presents but to say your not expecting anything back and then ‘sure enough. Not even a card’ sounds a but childish as it sounds you were ultimately expecting something
If these arent things you are willing to understand especially only 10 months into things, maybe this isnt the situation for you
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If y’all have been together for almost a year and he doesn’t include you in his plans with his kid… maybe someone else is spending time with them… run girl
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If u feel ignored imagine how the child would feel if he was giving u all that attention and not his daughter 
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Let that man be a father! You should be grateful he’s taking such good care of her because rest assured he will be taking great care of a child you guys have together. You’re a grown ass woman, you dont need attention 24/7. That 4 year old child does.
Have you ever thought he didn’t get you something for Christmas because you don’t deserve it from him and his daughter? I’m sure you don’t hide your contentment over his child very well. You don’t get to try and rob a child of her father and then play the victim. You very well may be a great person, but he is clearly not whom you are meant to be with. Stop wasting his time and yours and let him go. Find someone without kids, stay on birth control, and avoid having kids until you are ready to be a mom. By the sound of things, you actually DID expect a gift and that made you mad. If him being a good father and not getting you a Christmas present are the things causing you to want to end things, they probably should have ended awhile ago.
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Kids always come first. And, the fact he has a girlfriend who isn’t the child’s mother also means he probably has some sorts of visitation with the child. A good parent wouldn’t waste their visitation with the child. Also, you said you didn’t expect anything in return at Christmas, yet got upset; so you did expect something otherwise you wouldn’t feel let down. If I dated someone and they felt they needed to come before my children, they wouldn’t be there. And if I dated someone with a kid ( my now husband), and expected to come before his child, I wouldn’t expect him to want to be with me either. Asking to come before a child, that came before you is immature. Don’t be a flake, and run because he’s a good dad and devoted the time he has with his child, to that child.
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Wow selfish!!! His kid is nor important then you. Deal with it.
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Sounds to me like your jealous. Get over it or move on. His child should come first.
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Been in my relationship for almost 2 years my child is with us 24/7 and he has his 3 kids every other week. When we have all the kids there is no “us” unless you think sleeping in the same bed is a thing. Our kids come first. Granted it was weird at first bit I’ve adjusted to it. And his kids are my kids too. They arent a problem all our kids are first. You’re kinda being selfish. It’s not like hes with friends. Hes not with a girl. Hes with his child. 10 months should be enough time to understand that. But you most likely wont understand till you have kids of your own
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His kid is SUPPOSED to come first. You need a childless man.
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His kid comes first. Kinda selfish to be jealous of HIS child. No body and i mean no body comes before my babies
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You send very selfish for the sake of all of you, you need to end this relationship
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My fiancee has a 5 yr old son… I understood before we even got together that he had responsibilities and that he would come first. You need to either man up and accept the fact that it’s not just you and him but that it’s the 3 of you or go find someone who doesnt have children. Since being with my fiancee I’m not only a mother figure to his son when we have him but we also have our 5 month old little girl. His son may not be biologically mine but I love him as if he were my own. If it’s that big of a deal maybe see if you can meet his daughter? Try being apart of her life to? Try spending time with BOTH of them. You cant expect him to give you all his attention 24/7 when he only sees her on certain days.
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You sound very needy. You are definitely not as important as his kid. Maybe try dating someone who doesn’t have a kid so you can be the center of attention like you wanna be.
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So why are you on a mom’s group if you’re not a mother? Like this post Is so petty, immature and gross it’s hilarious
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Kid comes first… He should leave you
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His kid comes first over anyone. Its part of being a parent. You take care of your kid first and foremost.
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Why can’t you do things together?
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The fact that you aren’t included yet in the kid weekends and that he didn’t think of you for Xmas shows lack of relationship commitment, booty call. AND kids come first ALWAYS. If they don’t, he’s a shit man.
You aren’t and never will be more important to him than his child is. Clearly. I think you should leave him anyways, if he doesn’t leave you first, he deserves someone who is gonna respect him and his child, which you are not doing. You want a deadbeat go find you a deadbeat. Or better yet someone with no kids.
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Some of these posts crack me up. Like I feel like most of these are just fake like who the hell thinks like that?
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Truthfully if you can’t except that his child comes first then you need to end it you are wasting his time!!
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I would break up with someone if they acted like this.
You arent the right fit for him if him spending qualify time with his daughter is already a problem at only 10 months in, you’re wasting his time. Break it off and move on.
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Sounds like you are extremely selfish & should leave your bf! He’s got a daughter & it sounds like he’s actually stepping up and being a dad…a real woman would appreciate and respect that, not resent that!! His child comes first and is his MOST IMPORTANT priority…if you can’t accept that, it’s best for all involved that you remove yourself from the situation.
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Move on… plain and simple
Honey you sound extremely selfish
My fiance has 2 little boys from a previous relationship, he and I are also expecting our first baby together, when he’s with his kids
I do not want him to pay me any attention because that’s his time with his babies, that’s their time.
He showers me with love but when it comes to his kids thats a whole different story
I’m their stepmom, I love them to death, i love spending time with them
They come first!!! I’m sorry but you will never be more important than his child sweetie, hes doing his job as a dad!!! A real women would be thankful to see her man stepping up as a dad! God knows I love it when I see my man spending time with his kids,
I’m sorry but your BF deserves better than that, and so does his child
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How freaking old are you? Seriously, to say stuff like “when he doesn’t have her he gives me the attention that I want.” Is beyond childish. Like, I would find it hard to believe you even worked a full time job with comments like that. And if so it cant be a serious one. . .
REAL LIFE is busy. People with kids and jobs dont get to have high school romance, and that’s okay because what we get is sooo much better. When someone works or has kids and their time is limited so the fact that they give free time to YOU instead of taking some down time for their self, which is usually MUCH needed as an adult, it’s a much more precious gift.
And how much attention do you need anyway? Because if someone taking what free time they do have from a busy day, even if it’s just a quick text or call, isnt enough then you really need to evaluate you perception on quantity vs quality. . .
Honestly, leave him. Because staying is not only a selfish thing to do by waisting his time when he clearly deserves better but it also sets a poor example of what a woman and family should be to the child.
Also, if you’re upset or let down because you didnt get a gift in return then you clearly were expecting one.
This whole situation is just beyond sad honestly.
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This is a really sad post 
. You should respect him not be mad
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Honey that is a blessing. You should never come between a man and his child
His child comes first and will always come first. If you can’t see that you need to end it so he can find someone that knows his child comes first.
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Whew I admire this man!! Thank you for loving your child and not changing her world for a woman who doesn’t respect you love for your baby!
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you’ve gotta accept he’s got a kid. don’t be a crazy bitch here buddy… you’re selfish you sound insecure and like my fathers girlfriend i cut him out of my life because she did the same shit you are doing
Dont think your ready to have a man who has a kid. That child should come before you…always. maybe he needs to let you go. Making him feel bad for being with his kid…wow. lol
I cant.
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He should find someone better. He sounds like a great father.
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Lol your over thinking
I’m so glad he puts his kid above a girlfriend.
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Kid comes first. End of story.
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Might I add… For someone who didn’t expect a gift you sound pretty upset about it
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If it was your kid you would want him paying attention to her and not texting/showering all his love and attention on a girlfriend so his kid thinks theres something wrong with her and daddy doesnt love her anymore.
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