mainly loving infertile couples would adopt the baby and then the baby would have a stable home life with a mom and a dad who are together
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You have to carry the thoughts of getting rid of the BABY yourself , so get lose of him.
If you wanted an abortion and he didn’t want you to have one, you’d probably still do it right? Because it’s your body, not just his baby. So if that’s the mentality we want to live by, and that’s totally fine if it is, then we need to be equal in that mindset. If we decide we don’t want a baby regardless of what the baby’s father wants, we get that right. So dad gets that right too. He gets to walk away. If you try forcing a relationship it will only hurt you more and eventually it will hurt your child when he/she realizes their dad doesn’t actually want to be involved.
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This is MESSY. Poor kids. All of them.
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Not trying to sound rude but i stopped reading halfway through. Girl, leave his ass in the past. Hes not dad or boyfriend material, you and your children(and his too tbh) are better off without him. And also, you not being able to go through with the abortion 2+ times is saying something…its an obvious sign that youre meant to keep the child. Trust yourself, your body and your intuition and honestly fuck what anyone else says or thinks, including and especially him!!
Get rid of him. It shows that he doesn’t really care about you. Dump him.
Cut him off n take him for child support child support doesn’t give him visitation it just makes him financially responsible for the kid
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I’d quit worrying about this loser. If he wanted to be involved, he would be. Worry about your own health and your kids.
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This was extremely hard to read first off. Secondly he obviously doesn’t want to be a dad to another baby leave him alone damn
Cut him off and put him on child support
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Leave it alone… if he wants to come back he will.
The mess. Pretty sure he already cut you off completely from what I read here. I’d say this falls on what you want to do at this point.
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If he dosn’t want to be involved you can’t make him just like he can’t make you have an abortion.
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Cut his ass off and handle your shit…
And making him pay child support is shit when he doesn’t even want the kid. Just handle it yourself.
It’s not your fault. Takes 2 to make a baby. And I’d stop pressing him on being involved I think he’s made it pretty clear he does not want to be.
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Babies don’t need parents who are together. They need someone to love them.
Don’t force it. He literally told you probably multiple times he didn’t want it/wanted you to get an abortion. That pretty much sums it up.
If YOU want the baby, YOU have it.
If you keep pushing you’re feelings will be hurt and it will cause alot MORE drama then you want to deal with.
As women we are fighting the country to have a right to our bodies. To have a choice. So please, let this dude have his choice. Which he already chose, and leave him alone.
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How are you 4 months but been with him less than that. I agree with him about it not being his baby
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He sounds like an asshole. And you sound completely irresponsible. You can’t be irresponsible than force someone to be a father. I’ve been on birth control for 16 years. There’s no excuse.
If he wants to kill his child cut him off and get child support the judge will side with you hopefully
cut him off completly move forwardsok
He wants nothing to do with you or the baby. Move on.
You said you didn’t want more children and he obviously doesn’t want more, but no one used birth control???
Make a plan for you and your kids, because you will be doing this without him. You got this.
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You should have protected yourself. It’s not just his responsibility.
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I’d be moving on, if he wants to kill his unborn child definitely not worth a second thought
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He doesn’t have to be there at all for the pregnancy. But definitely file for support once baby is here.
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Save yourself the stress - move on !
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Both of y’all are irresponsible asf. If neither wanted a baby why was neither of you using birth control??
Cut off all contact and raise the kid your self. You can’t force someone to be there if they don’t want to be. Just file for child support and move on.
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I went thru something somewhat similar to this. I kept him off the birth certificate that way i dont have to deal with possible future visitation etc. And i met the love of my life since then who treats my son like his very own, and i am so glad i made the choice that i did. He doesnt want anything to do with the baby, dont force it on him just walk away. In a way, its not fair if he didnt want this anyway.
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He literally refused to take precautions and chose to leave sperm in you. Don’t force him to parent. Sue him for child support.
I’d feel totally different if he had at least worn a condom. But this guy? Sue him.
Cut him off. You cant force someone to be a dad.
Why is this even a question??? You have a child and are having another child and apparently dating a child. Get rid of him 
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He clearly wants no parts of this if he wants you to get an abortion. He’s not gonna come around and support you. So your choosing to do this on your own, which sucks but there are single mothers everywhere who are doing great so u can too. Get a dna test when baby is born, get child support. He chose not to use protection the same as you
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I dunno baby. Sending you love and light
Throw the whole man away.
He’s given you your answer, you even said so yourself.
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Your body your choice. He also has the same choice. Neither one of you used protection now you have to live with your decision. We can’t have it both ways. I feel sorry for all the children involved. Obviously there isn’t much of an education here and I hope you get yourself together and take care of your children whether he’s involved or not. My suggestion is you stop having unprotected sex!!!
I say put the baby up for adoption if you really didn’t want the baby and know he doesn’t! There at plenty of couples that can not get pregnant that want a family! Don’t just keep the baby for intrapment!
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U can’t force some one to be involved. If u want to keep the baby, the do so. There’s plenty of resources to help u. U don’t need him in ur baby’s life when he doesn’t want to be, he’ll only end up resenting the baby and it’s not the baby’s fault.
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Cut him off. Get the DNA test. Get child support.
You already know what to do…dump his but and move on
Okay first of all, it’s not just your fault. You literally said HE didn’t want to use protection. That means both of you are at fault. And secondly, if he doesn’t want to be in his kids life that’s on him. You have a family to think of and you don’t need extra baggage
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So, you didn’t use protection, so when did you know to use the plan B? Did you use it once you find out you were pregnant? Because that’s not how it works, you have to take it within I think 72 hours of when you had sex, and it’s usually when there’s mistake line the condom broke or you forgot your birth control, so if you were sleeping with him not protected every time, I’m confused as to when you took the plan B. I know it’s hard, but you don’t need him in order to be a mom to your baby. This is a risk you take when sleeping with someone, he is wrong, yes. It sounds like both of you are kinda uneducated when it comes to reproduction, him saying the timing is off…I mean, conception can happen up to like 5 days after sex, and they go by your last period, not day of conception.
Other than the fact that this was stressful to read, I would say do what you feel is necessary. Do what’s best for your life - not his. Who cares how he feels whether you want to keep the baby for financial gain or not? He didn’t consider that possibility when he came in you raw.
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Cut him off completely. He doesn’t want it so I wouldn’t try to pressure him. You can always attempt to get child support but that doesn’t necessarily mean he’ll pay it. If it was me, I’d ask him to sign over rights and move on with my baby. A lot of states prefer there to be someone to adopt the child BUT there’s quite a few that will do it if you can prove you can provide for yourself and kids without government assistance.
Let him go, there’s nothing to keep. It takes 2people having unprotected sex to produce a baby, that isn’t all your responsibility. After the baby comes, ask the court for a dna test to get child support, you’re going to need all the help you can get.
Cut him off completely. He doesn’t want it so I wouldn’t try to pressure him. You can always attempt to get child support but that doesn’t necessarily mean he’ll pay it. If it was me, I’d ask him to sign over rights and move on with my baby. A lot of states prefer there to be someone to adopt the child BUT there’s quite a few that will do it if you can prove you can provide for yourself and kids without government assistance.
It’s time for him to get on the male birth control.
It takes 2 so no one’s fault . If you don’t want another baby always can consider adoption many good parents would love to have otherwise he has answered by not answering!
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Cut him off keep the child and get a grant if you need extra cash he isn’t worth running after and every child is a gift from God not something to be taken. Lightly or to be pushed. From pillar to post
He told you he doesn’t want you to have the baby. You can’t make him be involved nor expect anything off him when you are the one who decided to keep the baby. He’s been honest and said he doesn’t want one.
Cut him out. You can’t change his mind your strong enough to do it on your own.
I only read the first sentence but I can yell you say goodbye bye bye bye bye
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Well! Regardless of whether he “wants to be in the baby’s life” or not, if DNA proves that he in fact IS the sperm donor, he IS obligated to pay child support whether he chooses to see the baby or not. You can’t force someone to want to be a dad, but if they’re the sperm donor then, the law says they need to contribute $$. So the choice is up to you and you only whether you force that issue or not. The kid deserves to have the $$support with or without visitation it doesn’t matter.
Cherish the baby, get child support, and get on long term birth control.
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Lord have mercy! So you have an 8 month old, clearly not with this guy…not on any form of BC, but chose to sleep with him repeatedly…with no protection…(if he didn’t want to use a condom, i would have demanded it, and you could’ve too…)
Not sure what either of you thought was going to happen…you are both responsible for this! SMDH…
Now, another one on the way…he gave you his answer…move on…get the DNA test done…you can’t force someone to be in yours or your child’s life…ask him to sign his rights away if he wants nothing to do with the baby…i wouldn’t want someone in my child’s life if they didn’t want to be….it will not make for a good life for you or the child! You can’t “tell him to be involved” if he doesn’t want to be…Good luck…to you, and the kids!
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He was very clear that he didn’t want that baby. You decided not to get an abortion, and now you’re upset that he isn’t involved. He told you from the beginning. You should’ve been more considerate of his feelings. You want the baby? Take care of it yourself, and leave him out of it.
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Not your fault! He chose not to use protection…so whether or not you were on birth control he COULD HAVE prevented a pregnancy. Sorry you are going through this, but I would recommend getting a DNA test and filing for child support. The baby is his responsibility too. Period.
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Do the DNA and sue for child support!! Your baby wasn’t made alone!! You deserve a percentage of his wages if you’re raising the child!! Don’t let him get away with leaving you to fend by yourself!! Contact an attorney!!
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Cut him off all together
Is this a true story ?
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Why are you asking him to be there when he didn’t want to have a child in the first place?
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What did he think he would get? Sleeping with a girl not on birth control without protection. A flatscreen TV? Girl let him be. Live your life with your kids.
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First off the grammar in this is absolutely shocking, it gave me a headache just reading it 
…… secondly you can’t force him to be a part of the child’s life if he doesn’t want to be
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Seriously, the fact he’s pushed you to get an abortion is your answer. He’ll never be involved. He doesn’t want this kid, or now you. Let him be.
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If the sex is good, use him for that. Just keep the baby away from him
You know already…if he does not want his own child,he will not be involved in your children’s lives…no one wants to live in a house with someone who makes it clear that they have no intentions of being part of a family…no one wants to live with a familiar stranger,they have no clear role,no one will know where they fit ,or how to interact with them…it will make everyone uneasy and subject to avoid them… it does not build love or a relationship…it builds resentment that leads to hate… he takes what is offered freely but if he is expected to give in return their will be a problem… he is focused on self only above all.
Plan B doesnt work after you are preggo. you have take it within 72 hrs of doing the deed.
You’re literally forcing him to accept a child he doesn’t want.
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You got your answer when he asked for a abortion
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Be honest why did you want to have another child you weren’t on birth control and he wasn’t planning on using anything and you know it. Did you ever consider giving up this child and putting it up for adoption would that be a possibility. 
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Cut him off. He has clearly already made up his mind.
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Omg jerry springer episode… to much drama on these groups sometimes. I am seriously getting too old for this shit
Women can kill children but God forbid let a man say he doesn’t want one 
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Girl leave this man child alone. Raise the baby yourself. Problem solved
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He already didn’t think about your needs when he wouldn’t use protection (it’s not just for not getting pregnant). Unfortunately if someone don’t want to be there, then someone don’t want to be there and at the end of the day this is your decision, not his. Cut him off completely now and save yourself the stress and further/future disappointment.
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Unfortunately he dont want to be involved you can keep him updated here and there to keep him in the loop and hopefully one day he will try for the child sake but you can’t force something he dont want it’s better to just let him be sounds like he just don’t want to end up paying child support as to why he’s being this way that and he’s just not ready but he knew the chance he was taking while doing the deed
- Please go back school
- He told you how he feels, leave him alone
- This was so difficult to read
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He didn’t want a kid. You can’t force him to be involved
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Neither of you used protection. This isn’t solely his responsibility. You could have absolutely chosen to say “if you don’t use protection we can not have sex since I’m not on birth control.” You also agreed to the plan b and an abortion and then you changed your mind. If you don’t want the baby, put it up for adoption or keep the baby and take him to court for a dna test and child support. You have and had so many options throughout this entire thing and you’re choosing to try to force someone into something they don’t want. I’m sorry mama, you gotta take some responsibility too, this was a 50/50 thing y’all did here. However, it seems he is hiding something considering he’s freaking out and pushing so hard for the abortion and not ghosting you.
And take him to court for child support
There is always a chance that you can get pregnant, EVERY TIME YOU HAVE SEX! You sound like 2 consenting adults, and obviously you know how babies are made. If y’all didn’t want anymore kids, you should have planned it better. I had one with my husband and immediately went on BC because I knew I didn’t want anymore and I wasn’t old enough to have my tubes tied. Here it is 12 years later and I still haven’t had anymore babies. The fact that he told you to abort it speaks volumes. He’s participating in actions that can cause pregnancy and his answer is an abortion. He sounds like a tool.
Sounds like the two of you was just f*** buddies and not in a serious committed relationship with expectations from each other. leave him alone and move on
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You have a 5 yo and a 8 mo child and you were having unprotected sex and weren’t taking birth control. Plan B or not, how irresponsible. Also note that plan B is less effective if you are over 165 pounds. You both need to grow up. He has a responsibility if he knew you weren’t on BC and he chose not to use protection. And you have responsibility because you allowed this. You both made this bed and now I guess you get to lay in it 
.
You got your answer… he played the game to jump in the sack but when the going out tuff and you got pregnant he wanted to abort… you didn’t. Quick trying to chase a man who wants nothning to do with you when it comes his own child. He obviously was only into it for the sex… SAD… there are better guys out there and one day you’ll find that mr right who will love all your babies!
He already told you. When the baby comes then paternity test and take him for child support since he didn’t want to wrap his tool.
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If he said he didn’t want it, and you chose to keep it anyway, you made the decision to raise this baby on your own. If a mother has a right to chose not to be a mother, the father has that choice as well. I’m sorry you’re in this situation and I wish you luck. But call it what it is, and don’t keep trying to force something that isn’t happening.
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If he wants out. I wouldn’t try to force him.
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I mean honestly he told you he didn’t want a baby. He’s being honest. Cut your losses & be the primary parent. No child support, but also no drama. SO worth it. Also, with an 8 month old toy would really think on protection. That will be a tough road with 2 so young.
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its your fault for not getting the abortion.
you did this to yourself knowing he told you to get one, yoj made the appt and canceled. your fault. now you have to have a child with someone who clearly stated he didnt want the kid jn the first place, neither did you, but you still kept it.
time to lay with your actions and be a mom to someones else child
you never should’ve canceled both appts - so make sure you get that dna test done and then file for support when the test comes back its his
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Sounds like he’s in denial since all he wanted from you was sex. Don’t force him to be there, he said he didn’t want it. Although, He might come around, but also might not. You can do it, it’ll be very hard to adjust but if you want to keep your baby you’ll find a routine that works.
There is always adoption if u are open to it. If I decided to keep a baby and he wanted nothing to do with it, I wouldn’t put his name on the birth certificate and I would move on. Keep the baby if I wanted it and could. U can not force anyone to be involved with a child they don’t want. It isn’t fair to the child or u to have to explain why the pos is more worried about money than his child. He doesn’t sound like someone I would ever count on for support for anything…more like a player.
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its your fault for not getting the abortion.
you did this to yourself knowing he told you to get one, yoj made the appt and canceled. your fault. now you have to have a child with someone who clearly stated he didnt want the kid jn the first place, neither did you, but you still kept it.
time to lay with your actions and be a mom to someones else child
you never should’ve canceled both appts - so make sure you get that dna test done and then file for support when the test comes back its his
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cut him off completely
Leave it be and file for child supporting
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With abortion and birth control getting ready to be ban, there are going a lot more people in the situation. Unfortunately, men are the ones that aren’t required/forced to be there. He can terminate his rights and never hear about or see the baby after it’s born. Which makes this attack on Roe vs Wade even more messed up cause men are allowed to run from/abandon their choices/mistakes, but women cannot. He made it clear he doesn’t want another child, and unfortunately, nothing you can do will change that. Sending positive vibes…I hope something works out in your favor
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Just leave him be for now. Send him updates as needed, like gender, issues, and when you go into labor. If he doesn’t answer or show then just schedule a DNA test and tell him when/where to be to get it done. After the results come in give it a couple of weeks to sink in and then see what he does. If he still wants nothing to do with him/her then you have your answer. My now husband never wanted kids and we broke up over it. Stupid decisions brought about our oldest and he cut me out until he got the results of the DNA test and freaked out. It took him a couple of weeks to bend his brain around it and he is one of the best dads! He loves his 2 boys beyond belief and we’re married now. I’m not saying every situation will end up like mine but give him time and space to feel his emotions and figure out what he wants to do with it.
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He already told you so just wait and take him for custody
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You can’t force him to be a parent anymore than he can force you not to keep the baby. You both made your decisions. Live with them now. Cut him off and go your separate ways. It will suck that your child will grow up not knowing the love of it’s father but growing up mistreated by a father that doesn’t love you is worse.
Stop sleeping with him and explain vasectomies and condoms to him. Don’t want to be a baby daddy rap it before you pack it
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Decide if you want nothing to do with him, then don’t put him on the birth certificate or get him to relinquish all rights to the child (sounds like he’d be happy to). You won’t get child support however.
If you want to file for child support, put him on the birth certificate and file with the courts. That would give him visitation if he’d ever want it. Also, since he wants nothing to do with this child chances are he won’t pay child support willingly. Others can tell you how successful it is getting back child support, but from what I’ve seen, most guys are in arrears by the tens of thousands before anything happens.
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Sorry but u both need to be fixed… and give thay baby up for adoption… u can’t force someone to do something they don’t want
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