It’s really up to you. I’m a step mom and it was really tough in the beginning. Can you handle him being in this woman’s life for the rest of your life? That’s what it boils down to. It sounds like he went through a lot and sacrificed a lot to be with you. Can you do the same for him?
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I don’t understand you you can be so DEEPLY in love if you’ve been with this guy for less than 5 months…. That’s no time at all to really know someone and he lives with you and your kids??? Girl WHAT ?!??!! So many red flags here. Please get rid of him ASAP, get therapy work on yourself and don’t even think about dating until you evaluate that whole situation
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So first of all you need to get a DNA test done and second of all he gave up everything to be with you and now because of something he did before y’all got together you want to leave him over it I think he would be better off without you even if the kids not his
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Yall both sound mentally unstable & for multiple obvious reasons. Good luck. This sounds toxic
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Well you’re just a whole bag of crazy.
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If you love him as much as you say, this should not be a deal-breaker. It happened before you two got together. After all, you didn’t have your first baby with him.
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If he’s going to go to dr appointments n stuff like that she will have more time alone with him to try to get him back , if she doesn’t want him back she wouldn’t want him to go places like that with her even if she’s having his baby even if yall think it’s the right thing to do, I wouldn’t want my ex to go with me who left me for someone else, but that’s me, just saying 
I’d keep my graud up n especially after the baby is born, if she wont let him see the baby alone with you at yalls place after couple months, I understand newborns need be with there moms, but if she wont then something is going on, n I’d make him leave, but sounds like u can’t really trust him from how yall got together
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Some of yall are being so mother fucking rude. 
first off as someone said DNA test please. And yes, you should stay if you both truly feel the way you do then the only regret you’d have is if you left. Love is hard, but it’s worth it.
Stay . Support . Love . Accept .
But he is your entire life after only five months??? Girl wise up, it takes a lifetime to get to know someone. You have two children already, you don’t need a third to make a relationship work. Wake up from your slumber and think of your children. Life is not always a bed of roses lol.
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Leave him. He’s too good for you.
I mean its been said, but wow. You expect him to accept your children that came before him, but you can’t accept his? You want him to be A good father figure to your children but bail on his own child? You have problems…
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To be honest if I were her I wouldn’t want my baby around you.
If he gave up so much to be with you, as you’re saying, then why wouldn’t you support him and his baby? That baby is a part of him. I can understand why your upset with not bearing his first child I guess, but leaving him because he got someone else pregnant, before y’all even started dating, doesn’t sit right. And apparently, going against popular belief, he has every right to be part of every step of that pregnancy. Just because they’re aren’t together anymore, doesn’t mean that he shouldn’t be a part of it. So what if she tries to get back with him, if he loves you as much as he says he does, then why don’t you trust him alone with her? The pregnancy experience is just important for the man, as it is the female. And with having two kids, you should know this. You should be more that estates that he wants to be part of that babies life, and starting now, could be the ticket to leading to amazing coparenting. Why don’t you become friends with said pregnant lady? That would make coparenting even more amazing and easy
Uhhhh… So many red flags here. Not with him, but with you. 
Good luck.
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Wow. He had a whole life before he met you? Insane. You have 2 kids already, so that means you had a whole life before him. How is it fair that he gets punished for his life? Who said she can’t get pregnant? Either the ex is a liar or your new guy is because he doesn’t want you to know that they were so having sex when you two got together so he’s trying to cast doubt. Or all of this is legit and you are going to have to adjust your life’s expectations. No matter which way to slice it this is all heading for a prime time Jerry Springer episode!
So did he leave when he realized he got her pregnant? Or did he leave without knowing she was? Why wouldn’t you be with him if you guys truly have this deep connection? How can you have a deep connection after 4 or 5 months? Why judge him if he has a kid when you have kids yourself? Why not embrace your bonus kid? Have you considered therapy?
So many questions…
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If he helps take care of YOUR kids why would you help him with HIS?! Pot calling the kettle black to me but ya know…my opinion…
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And this is why you shouldn’t be a home wrecker sweetie. You got your prize, a man you know will cheat. Now you’re insecure. And rightly so. Karma is real and the only one I feel for is the pregnant ex.
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Girl first of all BREATH!!! Then get out of your feelings about a baby that was conceived before you. He accepts yours, it’s only right to accept his🤷🏻♀️If he is your world as you say why are you asking us if you should stay?!?
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My question is if he can’t get a woman pregnant, how can she be 5 months pregnant??
Can’t imagine being upset because a guy wants to step up and be there for his child!
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Okay…but YOU didn’t have HIS first child but you expect him to love your kids? But you don’t want to care about his?? I would say leave for his sake. That shouldn’t be a question. I have a blended family- 2 bio kids, a bonus kid and another on the way with my husband. They’re ALL my kids and I never once thought I shouldn’t be with him because he wants to be there for his child. 
you should be happy that he wants to be there for his child. He wouldn’t be much of a man if he wasn’t.
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Hmm… if the child was born before you got together, would you still feel the same way? And not accept him or his child because the child doesn’t belong to you? What would you do if he said he couldn’t be with you because your kids are not his? Obviously, he needs to get a DNA test to be 100% sure, but you can’t be that deeply in love with him, if you aren’t willing to accept this child, assuming it is his.
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You literally have children from someone else and expect him to raise them with you? But you can’t get over yourself to accept the fact that now he has child from someone else. Wah he deserves better.
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Seems like you guys are moving way too fast, for less than a 5 month relationship. He shouldn’t even know your kids yet, he definitely shouldn’t be helping you raise them. I would tell him to focus on her and the baby for now and see what happens. No need to rush anything, especially when there’s children involved.
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So why shouldn’t she have gotten pregnant??? U did…twice. 5onths of lust is not enough in my opinion
If you have to ask that you would be no good for him or his alleged child
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and they call it puppy love:notes: is all that ran through my head when I read this. You sound like a teenager. You are already planning to have a child by a man you’ve been with less than 5 months because he’s the “love of your life” and your upset you’re not having his first child when you already have 2 children in a small apartment (your words, not mine) also if she couldn’t get pregnant and she did that baby is a miracle, the baby doesn’t deserve your hatred and resentment. I hope he goes back to his real life because you sound like one of those crazy jealous girlfriends that would hurt the baby on visits if you’re this hateful to them and they haven’t even arrived yet.
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So you’ve been with the guy for a few months and you are madly in love and wanted to have his first bio baby?
For real, if you think you love him, you stay with him and support him and his future kid.
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Funny how you’re SO IN LOVE after 5 whole months but wondering if you should break up over this. You sound unbelievably immature and slightly unstable.
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true love stay together.
Sounds like you were the other woman? Or you’ve only been together 5 months?
If it’s the latter, I can’t believe he’s taking care of your kids already 
Probably neither of you should be dating anyone right now. Lots of self work to do.
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Key words… before you got together.
He accepts yours …why would u even question it ?
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The more i think about this, the more messed up it sounds. You say he didn’t really love this other women but yet was having sex with her (clearly!), had a business and bought a home with her. That don’t sound serious to you?? You’re delusional if you honestly believe he can leave all of that without a backward glance and think you guys will make it in the long haul. Why is this man around your children? What makes you think he won’t leave you the way he left his ex? How you got him is how you lose him. You are moving wayyyy too fast. You don’t truly know that man or him you. If you are questioning your relationship already because he will be having a child with someone else, you don’t need to be with him. This has disaster written allllll over it!
ok so basically he cheated to be with u, gave up his business and home for u, accepts and helps with ur kids, and ur upset that the ex from the home u helped wreck is pregnant? oh and its been like 4 or 5 months (well maybe longer depending on how long the affair went on prior to him leaving her), & ur question is if u should leave? yes u should leave if u have any question or reservations of him being a parent to his child. its fine to u that he accepts and helps with ur children but ur upset and jealous he is going to do the same for his own? or r u upset at the fact he was still having sex with the ex while cheating with you 
if you love this man like u claim, u should accept his child and be there the way u expect him to be there for urs and have some respect for the person who is prolly struggling the most right now. the mother with the unborn child who was cheated on and left
Stay and help him raise that baby too and u guys have one also, imagine what u can do and how fulfilling ur life can be
If he got bored and left her, he’ll do the same to you. Just sayin…
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You have been together a while, but he got the other girl pregnant, who’s FIVE months along?
Grow up
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So they were married ? You said he gave her everything, house, business etc . I truly feel like only half the story is here and I can’t give any advice except 5 months isn’t enough time to make any of those decisions. It took me that long to introduce my kid to my husband. You’re moving crazy fast and he clearly has his own stuff to figure out.
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She’s 5 months pregnant? Y’all haven’t been together very long, and already living together.
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Why would you leave if you say you love him? The baby was before you and he still wants to be with you! Keep him!
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Girl, if you have to ask, I have to question if you do indeed love him.
He has accepted your children without reservation or question.
Yet you are questioning loving his.
Just as your children are an extension of you, his are an extension of him.
He has stood by you, given up EVERYTHING to be with you and wants to make this work.
Yet YOU are questioning standing by him when he needs you the most.
He never betrayed you.
He did not have the knowledge to betray you with.
You knew he was with someone else right before you ahead of time.
Yet you are contemplating, in a ways, betraying him.
Love is trust.
Love is acceptance.
Love, at times, is humility.
Love, at times, whether anyone wants to admit it or not, is sacrifice.
Love has ups and love has downs.
And if you truly loved him as he loves you, you would not even contemplate making him choose between YOU and his CHILD.
Just as HE has NEVER made YOU choose between HIM or YOUR children.
If you love HIM- TRULY LOVE HIM- then you will find a way within yourself to love, accept and be there for HIS child the way HE has been there for YOURS.
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you sound nuts
Best of luck I guess
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This is sounds infatuation, not love. It’s been 5 months, sis. Chill.
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I would say stand by him if she is only five month then you have been dating less than that and that honeymoon phase no matter how deeply connected you are is probably still going strong… i know i fall hard and fast too but i would also ask for a paternity test and not sign anything until it comes back… he may be the loyal guy but she might not be being honest
If you love him enough you’ll help raise the child. Children are a blessing not a curse. I would have helped raise my hubby’s child had he come into the relationship with one but god help him if he got someone pregnant now.
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If he left her for you he will leave you for someone else. You’ve only been with him for 5 months and you’re saying all this about him, sounds like obsessed not love.
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U r immature and a little bit nuts!!
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I stopped at five months and she’s not supposed to be able to get pregnant! How tf is he already playing daddy to your kids in such a short period of time? My man hadn’t even met my daughter by then! There’s no way you are madly in love with a dude who left his pregnant girlfriend 3.5-5 month’s ago for you!?!? Why do people bring partners around their kids so fast? That shhh is dangerous and traumatizing for the kids.
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I cant stand women like this, women who expect the new man to take care of her and her kids, but wont take his kids in to consideration.
If you love him like you say you do, then there would be no question, period.
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He gave up everything for you or did everything already belong to the other woman?
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This is the most immature and narcissistic post ever
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Dude, you are selfish and delusional. LOL
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I’m not here to Judge. I think that is y’all are happy together and y’all support each other. Support him with the new baby. It’s not the baby’s fault. Just be there for each other and the baby.
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It’s been 5 months! You don’t even know him at all and you’re talking about wanting to have his baby and all. What about the 2 kids you already have. You brought a stranger into their lives and have no idea if he will even stick around…seriously. you are grown, act as such. Your children need to be the priority.
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Be happy with what you have and stop whining
PLEASE seek professional counseling. IF you truly loved him, you’d be on board with helping raise the other baby. You are infatuated. WHY would you even have new dudes around your other kids?? Kids need stability. Grow up.
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Well he didn’t father your first so…. And it was before you…… and if you’re that connected with him??? Where do these questions come from I swear
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I decided not to be with someone bc he got someone else pregnant. After having my own kids, I realized what a silly mistake it was.
I would stay. I honestly know it’s hard to see him have another child. When my husband and I got together I was jealous of his son’s mother because she was able to have his child even tho they were insanely toxic. I have some sort of jealousy. But now that we have our daughter together that all fades. In time you two shall have that babe together. Help him navigate those waters and help him parent. Be there for him. Be his support.
He’s not giving you your first baby either…? You have two. Also if he left her for you, he will leave you for the next one. Bank on that. Which brings me to my next question, why were you talking to a man who was in a relationship? Doesn’t matter if he “wasn’t happy” or not… The man was spoken for and you pursued him. Another thing… You are SELFISH. He made that child and you shouldn’t even think about getting jealous at the fact he’s stepping up and will be there for HIS child when he’s needed. This entire post just made me cringe. And we wonder why children are so messed up?.. Parents. Parenting choices these poor kids have no control over. Just wow.
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Girl 
Let me correct you here cuz he’s clearly lying to you, no man just gives up a company and home they ownd to move into a little apartment, that shit was all hers and probably never belonged to him to begin with.
But as the saying goes, you’ll lose em the same way you got em 
Ok you lost me at she is 5 months pregnant. You have obviously only been with him 5 short months or less. Why is he even around your children? Man this is why crazy shit happens to people’s kids😡too many women are comfortable bringing new man around. Full stop. And if he was with her that recently and now with you it seems he moves quickly. Big red flag. Sorry. The beginning of any relationship always seems great. It’s after 6 months that people start to show themselves. There are so many red flags in this whole post. I hope for your kids sake he’s genuine and a good man. This isn’t fair to them to bring new people in their lives who now you obviously are questioning being with. That’s why you wait several months to bring them around. So they don’t have to feel loss of a relationship as well.
As far as being with him only you can answer that. Keep in mind that other female will now be a part of your lives indefinitely as well as that child if you stay with him. And just as u say he accepts yours you will have to accept his. Only you know what you’re capable of. Anyway just my two cents. I’m sure people will come at me for my opinion.
If he is good to you and your kids don’t throw it away. He needs to find out if it’s his child before anything happens it could possibly be some other guys child.
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So you’ve been together less than 5 months…. Relax. He hasn’t raised your kids. But… if you’re happy with him and this happened before you, support him like you say he supports you. He wants to be there for his child. Being jealous of that is petty and childish. Don’t make him miserable or make him feel bad for doing what he needs to do and be there for his child.
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It’s been 5 months at most you’ve been together and you’re so obsessed with a man you barely know… cool you have a connection but realistically you still have so much to learn about him.
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Girl if she’s only 5 months pregnant you two ain’t been together long enough to really even know eachother 
your children shouldn’t even know who he is yet . Children need stability not a random dude coming in their life and probably leaving bc the sound of it is he cheated on her with you if he left her to be with you and guess what? If he did it with you to her he will do it with someone else to you.
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Give that man back to his ex girlfriend. You ruined a relationship trying to play house and now you mad.
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Don’t make any decisions until a DNA test confirms that the baby is his.
You already have 2 kids and he has 1 on the way. If marriage and a blended family is your goal, DO NOT get pregnant by this man until after you are married to him. Notice I said MARRIED, not engaged. Just a thought - if he left his girlfriend for you, then he will probably leave you for someone else.
You said to start that he stepped up to help u raise ur 2 children this should give u the answer he’s there for u and urs why would u even question staying sounds like u have a jaded concept of love… u have 2 kids thats not his he ain’t mad about that… This is a real man that takes care of his responsibility and urs …stop being petty he needs u to do what he did for u and u are questioning it… No u know what u shouldn’t stay because he deserves better than someone that questions this kinda stuff and is not sure where they stand when he has clearly stood for u and your 2 so yea let him go so he can find someone who will match his effort… petty as hell here
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If they owned a home and a business i think it was a little more serious than you’re letting on. Were/are they married? Is that why you are so concerned? Idk kinda sounds like you were/are the side chick🤷🏻♀️
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Something isn’t adding up here. She’s 5 months pregnant so that means he’s only been seeing you that amount of time or less? Is he telling you the whole truth? Did the house and business belong to her and him or just her? I think the next option would be sit down like adults and talk it out how you’re all going to co parent the baby. As for having any babies with him at all I’d be wary how do you know he wont ditch you when you get pregnant?
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If he is so great with your children and you love him so much but you have a problem with him having a bio child of his own with another woman that he was involved with before he was with you, you might be the problem
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You’re only 5 months in and have 2 littles already. And he has baby on the way. I see you’re feeling a lot of intense emotions but You always will in the beginning of a relationship, because it’s still new. Focus on those babies who already don’t have fathers in the picture and trying not to repeat patterns a 3rd time, and consider breaking it off because he needs to, and hopefully will, focus his time on this baby. His child. An innocent person, who will need him, with a soul. I don’t say this to be hurtful, but this baby needs to be his first priority not your new-ish relationship or all else that you’ve mentioned here. You’ll more than likely be jealous of the baby and the interactions with the mother because there will undoubtedly be a lot of them and hopefully he will be there supporting their child along the way. Hopefully you can see how its hurtful for your children and will want his to have a chance and wish unselfishly for his child and encourage him to be there. The baby didn’t ask to be born into this. There are a lot of parts of your post that sound unhealthy. For the sake of your children maybe you could talk to a therapist or someone for mature advice or guidance.
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I can’t even comprehend how ridiculous this post is. 
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I mean…you had your 2 kids without him before him. So why is this any different?
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Do what your heart tells you, im
Sure itll be hard watching him be there for the other woman throughout the pregnancy, not to mention he’s now bonded with her for the rest of his life. Before you make a choice, I would get to know her and make the decision based off the type of woman she is; is she going to try to persue him? Is she in love w him? Is she willing to co-parent? Is she kind and respectful toward you? Or is she rude and manipulative, will she try to persue him romantically and unwilling to co-parent? Keep all those things in mind before making your decision. If you being with him and having her apart of your lives will be nothing but baggage and drama, it wouldnt be worth it to me.
Sounds like some red flags to me 
and you sound like your in the “honeymoon” phase
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He’s supported you, loves you and wants to be there for you always despite his ex showing up out of nowhere claiming she’s pregnant and you’re questioning whether or not you should leave him?? Girl bye.
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5 months in and u think he’s the best man in the world? 5 months in and u already have him moved in with u and ur kids? Ure going hella fast to begin with and u seem very childish and selfish to say u wanted to be his first bm and ure upset ure not… so u wanna be dude’s first bm with every dude u get with? Not even a year yet and u already thinking about having a child with someone u don’t really know. Ur priorities are messed up… 5 months and already living with u and ur babies like this world isn’t fkd up smh.
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This whole thing screams impulsive and immature. YIKES!
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Trust me when I say, if he done it for you, he will do it to you. I think it’d be hard alone to be with someone who left someone else for me… how do you trust he won’t do that to you? How do you know he didn’t know about it? I definitely wouldn’t be having any more kids until marriage that I knew I was the one & he was serious about me.
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So, less than 5 months into a relationship is not “awhile”. This man shouldn’t even be in your kids life yet and here y’all are living together. Less than 5 months in and you sound stalker obsessed and that’s not love, nor is it healthy! I just need to know…were you “deeply in love and connected” to every man you’ve ever been with?? I’m betting on that being a yes!
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Your hang up is that you are an insanely selfish person. You say he gave up everything for you but you don’t know if you can handle supporting him? Look in the mirror, you are the problem.
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You sound like you need to get your mental health in check.
Slow down! He should acknowledge the pregnancy, after the baby’s birth and DNA test go from there. Keep your eyes and ears open and make no demands. If he’s really the father he should arrive at a settlement and visitation for the child. After everything settles down, if you still maintain the feelings you have now, accept this child and decide if you and he can afford another one together. Remember, it’s the children who are important here! It is what it is, so make the best of it! 5 months is not enough time to know someone through and through. His behavior in all this will tell all you need to know!
You sound immature, jealous, and controlling. You didn’t have your first kids with him…why should he have his first kids with you? He was in a relationship and he is stepping up and that is the right thing to do.
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All I have to say is you sound so ridiculous and immature, he honestly deserves better
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I had so many things to say…but I read a ton of comments and it’s all already been said. I can’t even wish you good luck. Or him. I wish the ex all the luck in the world. I’ve been in her shoes. I hope he does the right thing.
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There’s so much to unpack here…
To keep it simple… Grow up
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Kick him back to his wife and new baby and you need to focus on your kids.
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Run! Don’t walk away~went through something similar ten years ago. Guess what!!! He is back with baby momma!!! Run!!!
First of all, feelings aren’t always rational but you can use logic to determine whether you indulge those feelings or do the work to move past them.
Secondly, you’ve not been together
“a while” you’ve been together less than six months. You’re still in the honeymoon phase of your new relationship and the fact that you already let him move in with you when you have two kids to protect is shocking. You hardly know this man. He is telling you he was in a loveless relationship because that’s what manipulative cheaters say. He left everything behind because she kicked him out. He’s lying. And him expecting a baby with her is the least of your problems. But even if it were the only problem, it’s irrationally jealous and possessive to be upset by him having his first child with someone else when you had TWO children with someone else.
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I think everyone is being really mean to you here. But get some therapy to help you accept the child and the situation so you can stay in your amazing relationship 
Sounds like the hallmark signs of the beginning of a relationship with a narcissist and you’re letting him raise your kids 5 months in? Honey, the baby isn’t the problem we should be focusing on here.
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What happened before you is none of your concern
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You sound childish and immature as they come. Good lord
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In all fairness, he isnt the one fathering your first child. You accept him as he has accepted you
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He cheated to get with you, he’ll cheat to leave you. When you’re the other woman, and you fall for it, you deal with the manipulation until he’s done with you too. This whole relationship is toxic! I feel for his ex and all the children involved. You’re mad you didn’t get to have his 1st baby at 5 months in?!?. My husband that I’ve been with 12 years is the only man that ever met my daughter from a previous relationship. Took 4 months with him before I let her meet him. You’re living together in 5 mad about the woman he had a whole ass life with before you stepped in. You gotta look in the mirror and remember if you don’t respect yourself, nobody else will either