** TRIGGER WARNING** My husband and I got into a fight and I was told to file a restraining order: Advice?

Sounds like you both need to lose custody of that child.

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So the majority think she needs a restraining order but she slapped him and yelled at him so they are both wrong both need help there both guilty for there actions in front of the baby they both need a break and counseling if one gets a restraining order then both get one he sought help at VA and AA what has she done there toxic relationship is both there faults when you put your hands on someone there are consequences no matter who you are male or female

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If you truly love your son and yourself you will RUN!!! This man will end up killing you both, don’t wait around and hope it gets better bc it doesn’t, leave now while you are both still here breathing, if he wants to get his shit together he can do so on his own but he’s a danger to you and your son. File the charges, if you don’t now he can hurt you in the future or even try and take your son away.

Absolutely yes! You don’t want your son around that! If he proves himself later on you can think about getting back together

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You both are being abusive. He could just as easily do the same to you and get a restraining order or worry about your son. You should be attending anger management all the same as you also put hands on him and first at that.

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All it takes is one time

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A fight is a fight. But you two took it to a whole new level. You were both verbally and physically abusive to each other. Seek out the help you both obviously need. If not for each other for the sake of your son :pensive: and yes since there was a threat against family, a protective order would be wise :+1:

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she obviously made a mistake by slapping him and we aren’t hearing his side , but I worry that She doesn’t need us attacking her right now she needs advice. I worry that even after he threatened to kill her family she thinks her son is safe. Please seek DV Counseling. He hasn’t hurt your son yet that you now of. It al started by him getting angry over your son. He lost it bc of your son. Your son is in danger

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Teaching your son it’s okay to scream at a woman and hit her. And then everything he witnessed you doing. Children deserve better than this kind of childhood. Why are y’all together when you’re so hateful to one another.

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Yes file a restraining order!

It only takes once…

File a restraining order. Get your son & your things & find a safe place to leave. Your son has witnessed both verbal & physical abuse. This is a form of mental abuse. Neither of you will be safe. I am a survivor.

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The problem is that you blamed yourself once so you’re going to blame yourself again yes you slapped him but then he went berserk I would get some help so that you don’t turn into the manipulative narcissist that he is but otherwise I think it’s time for you guys to go your Separate Ways this was your red flag.

Sounds like both of y’all are toxic. Move on and grow up, you shouldn’t put your hands on him just like he shouldn’t put his hands on you. You’re telling your version and you aren’t innocent, I bet his side sounds different. Two toxic people will end up with major problems and you have your son to think about. I’m nowhere near saying you’re to blame, I’m saying you both are. I feel sorry for your son having to live in such a toxic environment.

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Regardless of who hit who, he’s threatening murder. It’s in his mind.

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Maybe you shouldn’t have hit him. Pushing and shoving is one thing. We teach kids not to hit people because it isnt nice, and we dont wanna get hit back. Js
Sounds like neither of you are right and dont need to be around each other.

You should file a restraining order. Get yourself some anger management courses, cause the abuse went BOTH ways. Then stay away from each other🤦🏽‍♀️

Honestly you’re really lucky they didn’t get you both for domestic violence because you slapped him and he hit you. I really would just call it quits for awhile and think it over he hit you once he will likely do it again and worse

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Please read this:

“He shoved me against the wall and was yelling in my face trying to provoke me to slap him and saying he would kill me and he put his hand round my throat.”

Now he’s doing anger management?

Here’s the thing. If he was seeing red and had a real anger problem, why would he hold back and try and get you to slap him? If he was in a rage he would not be able to exercise that self restraint. He gave himself a warped permission to do what he did and he was trying to goad you to react again in order to justify in his mind, taking it to the next level of actually strangling you.

Abusers aren’t angry people. They can be, but they generally know what they’re doing and can turn it off when someone else turns up.

A lot of people on here are questioning you being the abusive one etc, and you’re probably doubting yourself a lot already. Unless people have been in it it’s hard to understand the dynamic especially if you feel you give as good as you get. But have you ever threatened or tried to kill him? Have you pinned him down and tried to strangle him? have you changed? Do you fear his reactions? It will take a while for you to come out of the fog and probably realise what was happening.

Please look up “reactive abuse”. Defending yourself or lashing out does not mean that you are not the victim. This is really important and something than people who haven’t been in this situation don’t understand. Talk to your domestic abuse support services and it may help you realise what was going on. People on the internet generally just don’t understand it.

Your son witnessing this is harm. Your son possibly being hurt by accident is harm.

I would go for the order, because I can guarantee he will be throwing you under the bus right now and he will further try to punish you through the courts by trying to get custody, and this will help your child stay safe.

It doesn’t mean he can’t still have contact. Just in a safe way.

Have a read of a book called “Why does he do that” by Lundy Bancroft who runs domestic abuse perpetrator workshops in the USA. You can download it for free and It might change your life. It did for me.

Good luck. You will realise you had the strength all along x

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File. Restraining order and for divorce. It will only escalate. The cops are telling you to do this because they have seen the outcome when action isn’t taken. Please for yourself and your son. If he is going to fix himself, he is the person that can do that not you and certainly not at the expense of your sons childhood and life. Leave darlin.

Both are in the wrong but let’s not forget this is toxic and abusive your children should never have to grow up like that to listen to their dad threaten to kill you leave while you can you never know how far it will go until it’s too late

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leave now. this is where it starts. it’ll only get worse. no man should threaten you and still get to stay with you. leave while you can

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You are talking and asking? You already know what to do. Get your act together as a Mom or get outta there.I KNOW… You have the most precious gift God will ever give you. If you cant then hand him over for his sake to someone who badly wants to and can. Seek counselling for yourself to learn how to love your child unconditionally. No judgements here. You handed out the facts and I admire that confession. Its no good unless you get help for you and your child. I used to work for Woman Reach in a big city. There are places not necessarily shelters although thats an option. Do your homework. In your favour you admitted your part so go with what you know…do it. Either do something or you will lose everything. . You are young. 40 years hence you will have deep regrets if you cant straighten things out for you and that precious child. Believe it…

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Do you want to lose your kid to CPS? That’s what’ll happen if they find out and you don’t take steps to protect yourself and your son.
Go to court and file custody paperwork so you get that started. You don’t have to keep him away from your son but he does need to show some stability first. You putting a restraining order against him won’t mean he never gets to see his kid but it will help to establish some boundaries for doing so, which you need.

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We also don’t know the whole story to this toxic marriage before we assume he is so terrible we need more facts I grew up with an alcoholic father when he was drunk he made threats when he was sober he was great and he got sober and stayed sober when I turned 14 we have all said things we didn’t mean in the heat of the moment if she truly believes he would act on his threats she wouldn’t be asking us on fb what to do it seems she has a supportive family and her mother in law is letting him stay with her so she isn’t stuck in the home with him

And just like a man should never put his hands on a woman no matter what it’s the same as far as no woman should put her hands on a man no matter what and as a woman you can’t think you can slap shove a man because you know he shouldn’t touch you respect yourself enough to keep your hands to yourself set the example to your son what a healthy loving stable life relationship should be

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Straight up a year off. He finds another place or stays with his mum while in therapy. Take back the key and have couples counciling too. Don’t let him move back in until you are both comfortable and don’t let him convince you to let him back if your not comfortable.

Let that man go! You don’t want your son grow up always wondering why you’re letting his abusive dad stay in your lives.
Move on and put your child first. Doesn’t mean you’ve failed anyone… next time your husband will hurt your son then what you gonna do? Let👏that👏man👏go👏

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Yes…he will not get better unless he knows you mean business, an do it for you an your son,get away from him for good. Been there an it works for alittle while then he will go back to his old self again, he is no good…

Trust me, the police are telling you what you need to make you and your son safe, they’ve seen this happen a million times, and 9 times out of 10, if nothing is put in place, they will get called out again to an even more violent attack or worse. Once they do it once, that is never the end, I know from first hand experience, is it really worth the risk of your poor son being witness to more violence? No it’s not. Even what hes seen is already bad enough, dont make him suffer more because you think he will change, he may, but gaurentee you it wint be for long till he does the same thing, its toxic, its unsafe, get away, stay civil and co parent, thats it, that is your only option now.

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No file a DIVORCE order. There is NO place in this world for this kind of domestic violence. Sure as S#$@, It will happen again. A child will grow up dysfunctional if one is exposed to this kind of thing. God Bless you

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If you don’t get away from him and he hurts your son it’s your fault. Quit being selfish.

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Honey please join a domestic violence closed group. You’ll get more empathy and correct information of how to go about this. I’m pretty sure this is not the first outburst he’s had and believe me when I say it won’t be his last. You are the victim and so is your son. I know how you feel. You know what you should do but you also want things to go back to normal. Also, people right away think it’s easy to leave but don’t know it can be very dangerous. Please look into that Domestic violence group. Message me and I’ll give you the link.

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Your lucky they didn’t take your kid!!
By the sounds of it you can be just as abusive as he can, I think you both need help TBH.
You can not push and slap someone and then complain because they hit you back. Yep he took it to far but i think you need to assess yourself aswell.

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Yes do the restraining order. If he hurts you in future you will have no proof he was previously violent.

Also who forces a 2 year old to poop in a toilet. Thats too young

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Patents should teach their daughters, it’s ok to go back home alive then in a body bag

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I’m sorry to disagree but I think you’re just as bad as him… you pushed him out of the room, you slapped him 1st… is he just meant to take it??

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File a restraining order. He can see your son in a supervised controlled environment

Your son is already in danger. Hes watching this! Disgusting. Leave for your son so it will be better for all of you x

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File the restraining order! His mother is trying to protect her son. It is your responsibility to protect yours!

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Leave and stay gone…move on

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Hey, let go while you and your son are still alive, if he’s threatening, he’s thought about it…take this from a woman who’s ex husband has assaulted her mother and slit her throat, in court when asked if he wanted to apologise… He stated, my only regret is i didn’t complete the job.!

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Your son should not have witnessed that from either one of his parents. You both sounds as toxic and physical as each other so I would suggest you stay away from each other for awhile and you both get therapy by yourselves and then together but that’s if you both want to save this ‘relationship’.

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You should file a restraining order. The relationship is toxic. You need to work on ypu and your son. You and your son should go to some therapy. Things like this tramatize children. After you are self sufficient and have had time to absorb what happened you could check in and see if your husband has made any progress. If he has i would suggest supervised visits by a social worker for awhile because you shouldn’t see your husband until he has had time to process that your relationship was toxic and needed to end. You can do this! Stay strong and ask for help when you need it.

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Leave. File emergency custody order and restraining order. Get yourself some protection even if it means moving. It sounds like each of you bring out the worst in each other. He causes you to be abusive and he is abusive. That is not a healthy relationship.

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Get rid of him keep you and child safe is your priority

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File the order get your son out of that environment. As someone who witnessed things like that when I was young I’m still messed up at almost 30.

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File for divorce . get away from him now
I grew up around that and it only gets worse. Get your son out of there.

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Y’all both sound like you’re endangering that child. Need to get your collective shit together, go to counseling and set up a safety plan for all involved so your child doesn’t get taken away.

If he hit you eventually he’ll hit your son! Abuse has no gender nor age when rage flares!

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You shouldn’t have hit him I mean it goes both ways but also he chose to follow you in and argue in front of your son and then chose to threaten you and your family while on the phone with your mother

So theres that!
Do what is best if your going to work things out then no don’t get one but if your scared and done with him ( knowing that you also hit him too) then get it and leave

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Take it a step further, I’m gonna play back what I took in from your words and what any social worker will understand from them. You said, me and my husband are raising our son in a toxic home. We get physical with each other when angry, in fact this last time I hit him first. In the face cuz he yelled at me. He then retaliated by kicking me. Long story short he knows he has a problem and is getting help for it, I don’t feel like I have a problem and am thinking about getting a restraining order against him to show I’m the less toxic parent so CPS doesn’t take my son from me… And that’s what any social worker will hear and think once the know all the facts. So again both y’all need to get help, counseling and parenting classes. Oh and definitely break up.

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I know I’m some states just because you want a restraining order you won’t be given one. You both seem to have been in the wrong. Do what is best for your son.

You both were in the wrong. You could tell he was past his limit when you left the room the first time, but chose to leave your son by himself and go back for more. He definitely needs the anger management and AA, but he also needs parenting classes and someone to train on potty training or helping children go to the bathroom. You need to work on walking away and staying away from people until they calm down. The truth is that we don’t know what kinds of things you were saying to him when you were fighting.

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You pushed him first though correct? So he has every right to defend himself by pushing you right back. Then you made the first slap, he went further and kicked you. :thinking: I’m confused as to how that’s all on him??
Regardless you need to leave because you’re both being toxic to each other.

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You most definitely need to file a restraining order. My ex husband was the same way. For yrs he took it out on me and then one day it turned into taking it out on my oldest. That’s the day I called the cops and got him arrested. Get out now and leave while you can. DO NOT STAY WHAT SO EVER!!! If he is threatening then he will do it

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Where I live at least, you’d BOTH go to jail as soon as it came out that you hit him. No ifs ands or buts. You shouldn’t have hit him. He’s wrong for sure but so are you. I think you both need anger management. You don’t hit someone unless you DONT HAVE A CHOICE. You had a choice. You could’ve walked away with your son. But you wanted to be a tough guy and hit a grown ass man KNOWING he was in a bad mood. I really don’t feel sorry for you. I do have empathy. My ex murdered my son and tried to kill me. But I surly never antagonized him because I’m not fucking stupid.

Get out. File the restraint order. If in a year he has proven himself then you can slowly start communicating. But nothing is going to get better if he isn’t made to realize what he could lose

Not for nothing, it sounds like u just dont quit. And that doesnt excuse him, his behavior or his issues, but it also doesnt give you carte blanche to act as inappropriately and physically as you did either.
I’ve learned that just sometimes it’s better to just shut up and wait to talk it out. Yeah, its annoying and you feel like they’re " winning " by getting out of actually talking about what happened. What IS winning is not having your son see you guys physically and verbally assault each other. The damage that causes a child, esp at that age is astronomical. Wires just dont connect right when exposed to traumatic stress and events. But you know that, overall things just got out of hand. Frankly, shit happens but at the end of the day u just need to know when to stop.
I’m not blaming you for what happened, I’m saying just sometimes you have to judge the situation for yourself and your son and chose not to engage. No one knows your husband like u do. I am sure at this point you are able to distinguish when a good time to “keep at it” and or talk and when it’s just going to be a lost cause and continue to something crazy.
Hang in there, both of you either need to make a decision to move forward and get some help and guidance, or split ways and raise your son CO-PARENTING in a healthy productive manner. Frankly at this point it doesnt seem even if u were to kick him out for good that youd be able to co-parent in a productive and healthy manner. There seems to be too much resentment and ill will at this point.
It really is as simple as making a choice. You are going to make a choice to act right or not.

File the restraining order and then you can go to therapy just like him and you also need anger management and you can have your son go to therapy also

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Well he’s getting help That’s great and maybe he will not do that again but you don’t know so it’s up to you if you need to get a restraining order

So wait a min. You hit him first and think that’s ok. He was yelling and you escalated it to physical… so you’re both in the wrong here and need to split before things get worse

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Leave take your kid an leave

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If you put your hands on him you are also in the wrong. And not for nothing but you were on the phone with your mother when he was threatening to kill you and your family…why didn’t she call the police right then?!?! Instead you wait till your father comes to get you and you leave…then call the police after??? You or your child could’ve been hurt or dead by then especially if he was drunk. I can tell you right now if I was on the phone with ANYONE and heard those threats I would’ve called police to their location.

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Don’t be an idiot, he’s already hurt your son by making him sit on the toilet who knows how long! What happens when he looses his temper with your son and backhands him into the corner of a table or maybe your son will grow up and abuse his family even kill your grandchild! I am that child that watched as my mother was beaten beyond recognition, it does something to a childs mind to watch this! I’m 54 and I still have problems with anger and hate, trust issues, authority issues and many others, it’s made my life horrible at times! PLEASE get away from your husband, his threat was from anger and so was the fact that he choked you, if you think this was a one time event then think again, even if he gets help, DO YOU REALLY WANT YOUR SON TO SEE THIS?

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From your post, you hit first. Maybe he shouldn’t have retaliated but I would have. In a heartbeat I would have. Thing is you said he kicked you in the leg. Only escalated after you put your son in bedroom and went at him verbally. I’m sorry but if the 2 of you can’t behave as adults, maybe you should call it quits. That little boy does not need to have to see mom and dad being idiots

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Both of you were in the wrong…things should never get physical especially in front of your child!! File the restraining order and get yourself some help. It seems clear that you too need to have anger management too

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YES. Your son will be just like him if you don’t get out now!

I went through getting strangled, lost my sight, then, I couldn’t move, then I almost lost my life, while my 2, and 3 years old children watched. I was lucky to start breathing again. I would get away from that.

You both need one. You had no right to touch him either. Personal responsibility. You just admitted your the physical aggressor.
Just separate already and stop damaging your kid, yourself, him, and all the family and friends that this is upsetting.

Hit u get hit back but the drinking is gross make him stop or leave

Yes if I were you I would file the restraining order. The next time he flips out like that could be worse & he could hurt you severely or your son. You don’t know if he could snap like that again & react in a violent way or follow through with his threats. I would definitely keep the order until he does therapy & AA & continues trying to get better

I’ve already commented once before but this post makes me so mad. You are as much at fault as he is. You hit him first. Y’all are like 2 years. You need to learn if you hit expect to be hit. Keep your hands to yourself at all times. Maybe you should go back to school and learn not to hit

The first thing is the safety of your child, don’t ever let him see you fight
Don’t get in this situation in front of him ever again, of course get a restraining order on him until you have sorted your problems out.

Yes please go and get help for you & your son …

Y’all need to chill out on someone in destress … he could do anything but right now your thinking with ur Heart not ur Know Soo get u & ur kids out …it’s Hard to see people for what they are sometimes . Be Strong & move on …I’m going thru some things like myself I live this one side to death but other side Scares the Shit out of me …God Bless you …

We are supposed too be here to help not condem…Amen I’m praying for u as we speak …

All of you judging her for hitting him or putting her hands on him clearly have never lived with an abusive alcoholic before so y’all need to get off your judgmental high horses and stop telling her she was being childish for trying to push the man out of the room away from her two year old child. He checked himself into a VA so clearly he is also dealing with some other issues as well… maybe PTSD… plus being intoxicated yes they could have both ended up dead. I’ve live through something very similar with my alcoholic stepfather… restraining order is the best route. He needs to better himself before he should be around your son. He should respect himself, and you along with your son.

Uhm wait hold on? They didn’t arrest him because you didn’t show the bruise? Tf? I’m sorry that’s sad and that’s a failure on the polices part. My ex was nasty like worse then this, like psycho type. Anyways anytime he got arrested you didn’t have to show any marks, there was an ex of his who just told a friend who told the police about what he did and he was arrested under just that alone… the police pressed the charges for her :woman_shrugging:t3: I would deff leave and file for divorce and a restraining order. The second that threat comes out of his mouth it was an idea in his mind/head. You don’t just say things like that… also him putting his hands on you and yelling infront of your child isn’t a good example, if you stay and he continues to do it unfortunately it’ll become what your son thinks is okay to do to women :disappointed: you never know the monster within someone :disappointed: he may have been a good bad but I’d be careful hun. Good luck in all you do :heart::heart::heart:

Your son comes first. In order for your son to become first priority you as a mom need to protect yourself and him. Your son needs you more than ever to be ok and safe, not just physically also mentally. In order for this to happen the restraining order should be filed and you being in the apartment by yourself is not safe either. Either move out or have a family member with you at all times. Learn how to use a weapon I prefer a hand gun or a shotgun for protection, but that’s me. A restraining order can and has been broken by many people, but it’s a weapon you have on your side in case he comes close and you have to use force against him. This may sound like it’s over kill, but you really don’t know what he’s capable of when he looses his power over you and his child. Please protect yourself so that your son will have his mommy in his life.

It’s won’t be long until he does hurt your son. The emotional abuse has already started. File the restraining order. Then separate and file for divorce. Request the Judge to make any and all future visitations supervised. If it makes you feel better, have the Judge to add in that that stipulation can be reviewed every 5 years. No sooner. Just because he is in VA hospital now and going to whatever meetings does NOT mean he will stay sober. Remember though, you gave birth to your son, so his needs MUST come first. I believe you know this in your heart because you left for dinner so your husband might calm down, and then you called your dad for help. It will not be easy and it will get worse–no matter how much he claims to love you both. Good luck.

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I’m not sure where you live but please contact your local Domestic Violence agency and speak with a trained advocate. Advice on Facebook is well intentioned but not always the best and often incorrect. If you need help finding your program you can always call the national domestic violence hotline 1- 800-799-7233.

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Yes you should. There are other ways for him to see your son. You can have supervised with his mom if you trust her or find someone you both can trust. I have went thru this with my son and believe me it’s a hard position to be in. But yes you need to protect yourself. Like I said there are other ways for him to see your son. I would do supervised visits til you felt comfortable with him by hisself prayers for you and your son and also to your husband and I hope his treatments work.

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You and your son get out while your alive. I pray you find the answers you need to find comfort and peace and for the safety of you both. If it happened once it will happen again. Love doesn’t hurt

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YES. File the dam thing
You may not live to make this post next time. And there will be a next time.:100:

Gut instinct, yes. It starts out like this, and if you hesitate, question yourself and try to give him the benefit of the doubt, it will get worse.
What part of “THREATENED TO KILL YOU AND YOUR FAMILY” makes you hesitate?? Some women did, and sad to say, their stories didn’t end well. Get help now, and fast. Not just a restraining order.

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Your son shouldn’t have to witness the abuse. I’ve lived through this. File. Make him prove he’s changing.

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You need to take action now, he will see you are serious and protective of your son, that is your priority then you can see if your husband has taken the AA and anger management classes, then and only then you can think about talking to him and give him the oportunidad to have supervised visitation time with his son, your responsibility is that your son doesn’t have to experience abuse or see abuse against you, other wise he will lose respect to you because he will see that the father is abusing you and later he will think is ok, is a big probability if your son constantly witness abuse that your son would come abusive as well. We have to be responsable of creating persons respectful and caring for mother and than in the future they will respect their love partners and live a healthy relationships

Until these anger issues are resolved y’all don’t need to be together. I can see where both of you were wrong. Neather one should be yelling or pushing the other epically in front of the kid or in the same house as the kid. You don’t want him to think this is how adults act. This is not how you want him to treat his wife or act around his child.
You said he checked himself in to the VA. Could he have PTSD?
I think he may not be equipped to deal with a small child. They are quite capable of fraziling a stable persons nerves at times. And face it potty training is not easy on the child or the adult. If this type of behavior is out of character for him, I would not make any rash decisions , it sounds like a lot of counseling is needed for both of you, especially him. But if this is typical of him and is not PTSD related. I would GTFO. Ether way if you think he may be capable of doing something stupid, I would get a restraining order. And tell him, you threatend me, you are suppose to protect me and our child, he does not need to be exposed to this. You and your child should not live in fear.

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Sorry to tell you, but it’s going to happen again. Please dont be in denial. Your son and you need to be protected not abuse. Physically versus mentally, the difference is the bruises heal on the outside, not on the inside. Everyone can give you different advise but you really need to do is what’s best for your son and that is give him that protection from anger,negativity and evil.

So she hits him first then she gets scared? Both need counseling! Child needs to be yanked from BOTH parents and kept away from toxic families. Remember, you are only getting one side, and possibly not entirely the whole truth. Of course she portrays herself as the innocent victim, though by her own words she started it. Remove the child and both get help. At least he seems to be taking responsibility and accountability. She hasn’t.

If you had a daughter asking all of these same questions… what would you tell her? I’m kinda appalled that your son was exposed to this fight and you’re questioning what to do. If you stay in the relationship you are teaching your son how to treat women. Your husband may be the aggressor, but your decision to stay gives you half the blame if your son grows up to terrorize women as well.

File a TRO, custody and child support. If it happens once it’ll happen again.

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Don’t feel sorry for him,his Mother is looking out for him not you.File a Restraining Order and Let him get the Help He needs.There always sorry but trust Me if you let him get away with it he’ll do it again.Maybe next time it won’t just be bruises.If he can get that angry over something so insignificant just think what he’ll do if you really piss him off.

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Unfortunately I have to agree put the restraining order on him. If it happens once it will happen twice. And just because he hasn’t abused your son, doesn’t mean he won’t. My ex beat me and then went after our 2 month old daughter. Now if he goes through the counseling and anger mgmt. Consider supervised visits through child protective services

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So far everyone is saying to put a restraining order on him, you realize for slapping him he can also put an order on you as well? If he has a mark you might not be able to if he puts one on you first. (Not sure if he would do that? Some people are manipulative enough to do so)I hope that you work out something with him civilly. Take photos of any and all marks, any damages to the house and keep any messages. Also a restraining order is just a piece of paper, get your license to care of he’s going to threaten anything. Cops can only get to a residence so fast.

Ok. Think this out. Just say what if it was your mom. You would drag her out. This is scaring your son. Get out now

First off air this out on FB and getting advise from strangers is ignorant! If he’s at the VA in anger management, he has a primary Dr. a counselor and a psychiatrists at the least! Best you can do is talk with them and work it out or get a professionals advise. Someone who knows the issues. Could be you are the issue! Therefore adding salt to the wound solves nothing! So talking with his doctors are the adult and responsible thing. Hope things work out!

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The police and the DCF both told you to get a restraining order and you are asking facebook whether you should. Leave and take your son where you will be safe, don’t expose him to any more of your drama. If he is in the VA, he could be suffering from PTSD, so get out before things get worse, much worse.Listen to the police, they know.

Uh, hello? The POLICE told you to file. The DCF told you to file. What are you waiting for him to beat you half to death??? PS- you need to ignore your mother in law.

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