He has to be solely responsible for his own child. He cannot schedule things when he has his child that force him to leave that kid to be babysat no matter what. And if he does his ex has to be given the right of first refusal, meaning she gets the option first of being the babysitter. If hes pissed? Its not why he said. Its because hes glad to have thw image of being the dad being consistant in taking his visitation without the actual responsibility. Kicl him out. Then see how much he wants your baby and that child every other wkend where its only him and two kids with no live in babtsitter. Sorry if i sound jaded. But heres another: stop having kids you both have no room for and you dont have a college plan for the minute they come into the world. Theyre not toys to leave at whoevers’ house.
Its not all about u. His son comes first hat’s off to him that’s what you call a true father.
Yes you were wrong! Point blank! And the way he acted shows that he is an amazing father! KIDS COME FIRST
And why does it have to be one way or another. He should have just talked to her and ask how would you feel. And wait COMMUNICATION!!! THEN they explain each side. That’s wrong w relationships now days
1000% wrong. He gets his boy 1 maybe 2 days of week your saying and you dont want the child to come because yours are not there. Thats the perfect time to have just thr 1 child so he can feel.special without your 4 kids. Wow very sad. Id leave too
No, he needs to take his kid on HIS day off, which is Sunday. Sounds like he was just looking for any fight he could have as an excuse to pack his stuff and go
Maybe asking for a date night, or a day where you don’t have to take care of kids would have been a better approach. Maybe on Saturday he would be up with the kid, and you could sleep in, watch movies or do whatever you wanted.
I dont expect my bf to take responsibility for my kids for full days/days at a time (at most an hour or two here and there) And I would hope if my boyfriend had kids it would be the same
I also have kids with my ex, and my current bf doesn’t have kids. But I would definitely feel the same if I had to take care of his kid while its my break weekend . I would ask him to be home, or take his kid when he doesnt work.
You took his child on when you took him on as a boyfriend. It’s one thing to get a sitter to have some alone time, but asking him not to pick his child up is not okay.
Not married or married? Regardless, embrace this child, his son, as your own. Love him.
Be lucky to know that if u guys are to break up he would put ur child first before any girl his with not many of us are lucky like you
SELFISH MUCH? That’s his child…PERIOD if that the time he has him then he needs to be a dad!! I take it you two are having a baby together so what do you do when that comes and your other kids are at their dad send it away! Your not step-mom material…That’s for sure 
Yeahh. That’s pretty bad. I mean I u see stand your thinking and how your probably don’t mean for it to be as bad as it is but it’s bad. If you love your bf then his kids should be your kids. And that’s his dad and that role is important. You don’t just ask him right beforehand to cancel on his son, that could be traumatic for both parties. If you want alone time then plan ahead and make arrangements with both sides so no one feels blind sided
You would never want someone to make you pick between you and your kids, so why would you ask that of him???
Everybody on here saying I’m glad he picked his child over a woman are so wrong. She is also pregnant with is baby, and she never asked him to choose between them, she asked him for a 1 day break, 1 day🙄 I think that is fair, if she hasn’t got her children, then it’s obvious she wanted to spend time with her partner before the baby is born, because she knows she will not be able to after. It’s not unreasonable of her. U have assumed so many things from the post, 1 being that he looks after her kids, he doesn’t as he’s at work, and when his sons there she looks after him. He’s not the fantastic father u are all pretending. I can imagine she’s worn out running around after everybody and perhaps wanted 1 day off. She’s not a monster for wanting this, good god get a grip people ffs. She didn’t act like a little baby like he did and move out, she simply asked a question. But I suppose all you’s slating her are so perfect and have never needed a break🙄
Maybe y’all could schedule the weekends that your kids go to their dads u can schedule for y’all to have a day once a month or something so y’all can have adult time without kids. Maybe you need to explain it to him the way u explained it to us.
I’m sorry that you’re going through this some moms feel like you shouldn’t complain because they don’t have that luxury and some moms feel like you have every right to ask for quality time because there’s nothing wrong with asking for a little quality time especially if the time can be made. we don’t know your whole situation therefore we can’t really give you advice on your situation but hopefully it works out for you. 
Yes. That was wrong & selfish. His kid is just as important as your kids. I would’ve been pissed off too.
You aren’t married to him, so you have no say in when he see’s his son. His son doesn’t know you other than the lady his dad lives with.
So he gets his son on Saturday but isn’t with him, you are? Maybe its time to set up a visitation schedule that works for all parents involved, with ALL the kids best interest in mind. If he was that quick to pack up his stuff and leave when you asked either you have a lot more problems or you said it in a way that came across wrong to him.
What you have is a communication problem… You needed to talk about his schedule in general… And in no way, shape, or form should there be a choice between you or his child… What you need to work on is communication and balance …
Your flat wrong… Being a parent often means no more alone time… Never ever ask someone not to get their child seriously… You made him chose he picked his kid like any good parent would…
Maybe find a day he does not have his son. Personally, I have 5 kids 24/7, 3 biological and 2 are my nephews we are adopting. As hard as it is, I get very few breaks, even when I desperately need them.
Being a mom whether the child is yours biologically or not does not end a certain day or a certain time. But also if you’ll have only moved in together in the last couple of months there should be some sort of an agreement for his child being there without him
Yes you are way wrong. You knew he had a son before you got pregnant. You knew he had his son every Saturday and now you’re asking him to give up his only day with his son. When you have kids you don’t get alone time. Stop being selfish and suck it up.
I applaud him. Awesome Father for putting his son first.
Maybe ask him for a weekend together, Do not make him choose.
You’re wrong. You’ve already turned his son away when he wanted to live there - family finds a way. It sounds like you consider his son an outsider. I would have left too. The 2 if you need to figure out a plan that works for your entire family.
If you needed a break then go somewhere alone visit a friend, mom, sister, go shopping to the spa ext dont ask the man to not see his child on the only time he has if you are tired witch i understand get away just a day yes you might not have the day with him but you will get some rest hopefully you can mend things for your comming child as he seems to be a good father think or ask him what he thinks it might be the way you approached him if you had romantic gestures it back fired badly even though it doesn’t sound like that and i think he thinks you are selfish. Best wishes for your family.
For him to leave instead of talking about it is just wrong! Especially when you are expecting. Sometimes we say wrong things. I mean you are probably hormonal. Not cool that he packed up and left. Give him time…apologize if you have to. If he loves you he will come back.
You should have worded it differently instead of making him choose between his child and you. Talk again and ask to have a day in the future and plan one Saturday date just the two of you. Nothing wrong with taking a day to spend some quality alone time especially if you two are having a baby together soon. Just sounds like some miscommunication. Btw, you’re not just some gf. You’re his future child’s mom. He should have stayed and you two talk like adults
I’m a single mom with 2 kids that I raised myself since day one, their dad never spends time with them! No weekends ever. At least he has him on weekends?
Ummm what’s going to happen to this new baby once it gets here ? I mean 1 day is not alot at all it could be more days then you’d really be pissed huh ? He’s the father of the baby right ? And you’d want him to be involved as much as he can but I’m sure the mother of the little boy wants the same thing
Yes your wrong for that 
. If the shoe was on the other foot I’m pretty sure you would be livid as well. I feel sorry for his child
So everyone applauding him for choosing his son but she’s also carrying HIS child. Him leaving sound more like he’s tired of something. Instead, should talk about what you wanted and come to some kind of agreement. Like maybe getting him later in the day. Or even drop him off early. There’s something that could have been spoken about instead of just leaving. He probably doesn’t care about you and your baby since he didn’t hesitate. (My opinion anyway) if he doesn’t reach out to you at all or figure something out then you’re better off without him.
Everyone is bitching at her that she is wrong… Well she isn’t wrong if she is the one caring for the child where the father isn’t… Dear lord she is 7 months pregnant… She isn’t telling him to choose. The poor lady is just asking for a break.
Everyone here bashing her about how he is a good dad. He gets his kid 1 day a week, his gf is doing the cooking cleaning childcare etc while he is and is not home on the day his son stays over. She is 7 months pregnant, working full time, has 3 other children to care for 5 other days of the week. Maybe you should have approached another way. If you want some time to relax and be alone, go get a pedicure. Get two! You will enjoy it. But no you should not have asked him to pass on seeing his son for the day. You will have alone time in about 14 more years… It is all give and take babydoll. Good luck.
It’s Father’s Day and good for him for caring about spending time with his son!!!
I understand needing a break though! Especially in ur 3rd trimester! What’s up with him packing up and storming off over an argument though? Hes right in choosing his kid but there has to be another option that works. Like maybe his child comes over on Sundays instead of Satruday so u have a little time to yourself? Everyone should cool off and talk this thru.
I think that was pretty quick to pack up and move out without discussing anything… or finding out the real issue. If he works on Saturdays she sees his son more than he does. Just seems hoaky to me.
You are a selfish person who sees her kids all the time! He has his son 2 days a week. So he should raise you’re kids and not see his because you are tired and pregnant?? They are a package deal.
Picking and choosing when to be an active parent/ step parent is so insane. Asking for a day off of parenting is even more insane! You knew what you were going to be involved in before you became involved. My husband has 3 amazing and beautiful boys that I have helped raise for the last 13 years. They are my sons! They are my life! I also have an amazing daughter that my husband did not father. She is my most precious gift! And we have a beautiful 11 year old daughter that we are both the parents of. When you enter a relationship where the other person has children, you can not pick and choose when to be in there lives! Either you are there or your not. No in between! Just choose to love, except, and welcome your step child into your lives, or just don’t bother to be with that person asking them to not take there child when it is there time is just outrageous! Food for thought I guess 
You don’t have the room for 5 kids…well then maybe you shouldn’t have had another one…that is really messed up of you to ask that and i would have left too.
Ok, if she has every weekend off, he has every Sunday off, her kids are gone every other weekend and his son is only there every Saturday, she already has one Sunday alone with him.
I understand this time in the trimester is hard and you want to spend time with your partner before bubs is born. But remember what comes first. Kids always come first when you have them. You guys will get a chance to spend time together. That’s when the kids are in bed asleep. You don’t want to push a great man away hun. You more then likely won’t get another one. All the best x
Yes… you were wrong to ask. Imagine if he asked you the same thing. Kudos dad for picking your son!
I understand what you are saying breaks are needed, but you need to understand with him comes a child. Maybe maybe rotate weekends to match his. Maybe plan a getaway so he can be prepared. Get a babysitter for some hours. Hes being a father and thats his baby.
I hope you show him this post when you apologize so he knows hes doing it right!!! And the fact that the little boy loves your house enough to want to live there and you are saying no??? Omg. 
I see where your coming from wanting a day for just the two of you but maybe plan it in advance he may of just felt completely off guard
Good for him! You were definitely in the wrong. I get it, we all need a break. But he gets his child one day a week. That poor boy will pick up on the way you are and he will suffer from it. Good for his dad for putting the child first.
I can understand the being exhausted part from being 7 months pregnant, working full time and having 3 kids. BUT its not the boys fault. He deserves to see his dad and it sounds like he loves the environment you guys provide for him. In a few months ull have a newborn - you and your partner have to be a team and make the most of time together when u can, just like the rest of us - thats parenthood.
That is a great guy man he wants to be a part of his kiddos life. He made the right choice in this matter!
OMG the visceral response I had to this is crazy. Did you even think for a second about the impact that the refusal of a visit would have on the child or are you too selfish to think about that? AND, if his son living with him was what’s best for the child how dare you prevent that. It seems that you are interested in accommodating only your children. He did exactly what he should have done. If you want a break do what the rest of us responsible parents do and get a babysitter so you can go to dinner or something. I have 3 children (2, 4 and 6yr)…24/7 so i don’t need to hear any crap ab stress, you get a built in break every other weekend it sounds like. The very unfortunate thing about this situation is that there will be another child having to split his/her time between different homes because you are too selfish to get yourself together 
I have to say that I feel you were wrong to put him in that situation and be glad that hes that type of father because at least you know he will make your child a priority as well.
Since he only gets his kid one day a week, ya picking that day for couple time was a bad choice, blending a family is hard work, try to find another day for together time
I can understand you wanting alone time… but I cant understand you asking him not to have his son … the situation ye have between ye wont change ye both have kids ye both need to make them priority… you cannot make him choose because hopefully he will always pick his son first
So you want him to never see his son. He only sees his son on Saturday and your complaining that you have to take care of him when he is there. I bet your boyfriend helps take care of your kids when your not home… I hope he stays gone. You dont deserve him
Get a babysitter while he is at work if you need a one day break from your once a week day to have his child in his home. You are selfish. Can’t believe this was even a topic.
Considering fathers day is this weekend I would say you are wrong. I would have to applaud him for choosing his child over you in this instance.
WOW!!! The fact that you said no to his child living there really says it all. That child deserves a better step mom and the man was 100% right for leaving you.
You find a way to get time together but you never ask a parent not to have their child.
Good for him! He’s a great dad and should kick you to the curb and be a great father to your child as well. Super ballsy of you to ask that he NOT take his child. How would you feel if he asked you to not have your kids. You’re wrong, not him.
It’s not fair he expects you to take care of his son on “his” day. If I was her, and he got this angry…I would let him bring his son over, then leave and go take a much needed and deserved break.
Let him spend time with his son alone.
So… You’re not asking him not to come, you’re asking to reschedule. I don’t think that’s wrong BUT you already knew about his child and what makes it kind of ridiculous is you saying you don’t have room for 5 but the majority are YOUR KIDS. So you kind of put the burden on yourself, hun. Like he’s only adding one additional child to your household. And did he ever say “I don’t have room for 4 kids”. Nope. No he did not. So the whole moving thing… Either deal or take YOUR FOUR CHILDREN and go. And maybe his new girlfriend can say she doesn’t have room for yall kid, one day.
I agree on dad on this one. I’m a mother of 3 all under the age of 6. Send the kids to bed at a reasonable time so you can spend some time with your boyfriend. I’d do the same if my boyfriend asked me not to have my kids over the weekend.
Wait. So you don’t want his son (who asked to live with yall) to live with you because you “don’t have room” but you’re having a baby? Then you tell him NOT to get his son on his day? Honey you need to sort out your priorities thats his SON. That little boy should ALWAYS come before you especially since he isn’t with yall all the time of course he’s going to get mad. You asked him to choose and he did 
I think if maybe you asked him to trade the next day he had a visit and do that in advance, would have been better than asking him to give up time with his son. He doesn’t seem to get much and perhaps you could take off Wednesday from work?
You have your reason but your reason isn’t a valid one . His son that he only sees once a week , that time is way more important for your alone time . If you want to be alone, don’t have kids . Kids always come 1st .
Couples should be able to compromise. Him leaving is not acceptable.
Tough situation. Hope y’all can find an in between so everyone’s happy
Remember … Kids always come first
You knew what you signed up for, & you SHOULD naturally care for that child with out pointing out the fact that you do these things for him… If you need a break, ask him can we get a sitter for a few hours? BUT asking him to NOT take his son is very sad to me.
Yes it was wrong. Having him in your life and having a child together means you both have to accept the out of marriage children. Flip the script and see what you think
Seeing as how he doesn’t spend time with his son, & your the one that does, you had a right & need for a break, if he wants his son so bad, then he should be there with him
Never ask a parent to choose yes your wrong the kid comes with the package
Wow I am with boyfriend!! How dare you ask him to put his child aside because you want a weekend to yourself, seriously selfish a bit?? Does he ask you to not be a mom to your other 3 kids he didn’t ask for?? You should count your lucky stars he still around with all the kids you have!!
Let’s remind ourselves she is having a baby to. Lets ask why he’s first relationship didnt work, he needs to stop having kids and wanting relationship to. I raised both my girls until they turned 18 then I found someone. Sorry but its his fault, so what, is she not worth one weekend off?
I don’t think it’s selfish to want a break… I would maybe ask the ex husband to switch some days as he has the kids more than your boyfriend has his kid.
I was 17 going into my first marriage with two step kids and I would never have asked this seems like you have quite a few kids and he has some previously and your pregnant again that’s what happens when you have children and continue making them it’s no longer ABOUT YOU it’s about the kids in my opinion yes and I would’ve done the same!
Communicate your needs better. If that’s how you said it to him, then you can’t fault him. All you had to say was “Babe I’d really love to have some alone time with you, can we plan for it?”… he would have still been there.
Your cold hearted how dare you that’s his kid does ever tell you not to have your kids come during the week probably not I bet he pays for your kids to helps keep a roof over their heads? What are you gonna do when your baby gets here? Tell him to give the baby to someone else so you guys can spend alone time there is no more alone time once you have kids I think you should grow up and realize that once you became a parent you lost all privacy
Why don’t you go out while he see’s his son once in awhile. It is a lot to ask of him. He lives his son. I’d work with your exes to get on a schedule. As far as his son living with you. I don’t know how you could not if its what his dad and mom want. Your kids occupy most of the home. Not fair
What an GREAT father to choose his son. I wish my son’s father would choose his son over a female. I am soooo sorry baby, but he comes with his son and there should always be room for his son to be with him… just like your guy does for your kids with your ex. Babies didn’t ask for you to keep making or accepting their daddy… they are pure love… sorry… if you need a break, cool… take it, go somewhere, but to interfere with his son and his weekend is wrong…
Way to go DAD! MY EX CHOSE WOMEN OVER HIS KIDS AND IT BIT HIM IN HIS ASS. EVEN TOOK GIRLFRIENDS KIDS AND GRANDKIDS TO DISNEY THE TWO WEEKS HE WAS SUPPOSE TO HAVE THEM. WISH MY KIDS HAD A FATHER LIKE HIM.
He was right to go. You never ask someone to choose like that. Because anyone good and decent is going to always choose their child.
I understand needing a break but when you dad a man with a child they are a package deal and you knew going into the relationship that you would have your children on weekends he didn’t have his and visa verse . So yes you were wrong and I would have done the same thing and left any guy who wanted me not to have my child on my weekend !!
Dad needs to change the visitation arrangement. Maybe get his kid on Sunday’s when he’s not working. Not Saturday’s while he’s working.
Sorry but as a mom who has a very involved father in their child’s life and one who could care less about his child because of his girlfriend…I feel you are wrong. I understand your point however you can not ever ask that of him. Hell you should be grateful for a man who takes his role as a father seriously !!! I am blessed for my daughter s father because our daughter is his whole world…and I hold so much resentment as I have to deal with my son’s pain because his father is not in his life but raises and supports other children
I think if you had asked to swap the day his son visits rather than suggest not having him at all, you would’ve got a very different response. I feel like him choosing to leave rather that talk is not ideal but suggests that there is possibly more to this story? Ask him if it can be arranged for him to come on a Sunday and organise a babysitter for Saturday night so you can go out for dinner or whatever interests you both. Dont make him feel his son is an inconvenience, you would have to cook and clean and supervise the kids regardless of his son being there or not. I agree that every parent needs time out but not at the expense of only one child, that’s not fair.
I don’t think it’s wrong to ask for an occasional kid free day. But it sounds like you guys have a lot of communication issues to work on. Blending families is tough enough if you can’t even talk about things like that
It’s Father’s Day weekend, of course he wants his son to be around. If you want time alone, get a babysitter.
You were wrong. He lives with you. You are not a priority. Kid’s are. I would’ve left too. You can always find a way around it . That is extremely selfish.
I would of gotten up and left too. His child should be his #1 priority just as your kiddos should be yours. Your lucky enough to get to be around your kids all the time…he isn’t but you have the gall to ask him not to get his son when he seldom gets to see him. Youre selfish and are only thinking of yourself. Maybe you should consider getting a sitter and dumping your kids off with someone instead of asking him to give up his selective time with his child. If u truly love him u would equally love his son too. Plus you say u dont have room for his kid…if u love him and his daddy u would make room and not excuses. Get over youraelf.
Sorry but I agree with him.How would you have felt if he asked you not to have your kids at any point and time.Seems selfish on your part.His child should come before anyone else.As for alone time welcome to being a parent.
Ok so i have 3 kids from a previous and a son from my bf and he has 1 from a previous. Never did i ask him not to see his kid so we can spend time together. I worked around his visits with his kid bc i knew how important it is to him to see her. Plus of u miss a visit they can call and tell the courts u missed a visit and turn into something bigger. I think both parties were wrong in this. U choose to be with someone with kids and knew the days he gets him and but he was wrong as well to get mad a blow up. If your going to blend a family there is give and take. What of ur ex told u he wasnt getting ur 3 kids bc his gf wanted to spend time together u wohld get mad bc its his weekend with them. What if his ex made plans around visits and last min he has to call and cancel the one day he gets his son. As a baby mama i would get mad its one day and week.
Children come w a lot of responsibility yours or his … and he has kids those kids are yours also … he was right to choose his child .
Yeah that’s totally wrong…how would you feel if someone asked the same of you? That’s HIS CHILD! You should be glad you have a good man who loves his kid, at least you know if something were to not work out between the two of you he wouldn’t let some woman come between him and your kid together! I get that you’re tired, but seriously suck it up. And you have no room for his son who wants to live there but you do for your kids…wow 
If you dont want to take care of his kids how about you leave on Saturdays when he has his son so they can spend alone time together. You probably demand attention when he has his son anyways so I’m sure they’d love to have a break from you and get some ‘alone time’ 
tbh you sound like you’re jealous of his CHILD
You are wrong. You have your children most of the time and he does not. To be a family everyone is included.
He gets his child one day a week and you want him to give that up? How would you feel if he asked that of you? Youre being really selfish. Why dont you see if your ex will keep your kids an extra week instead of him giving up his one day? Good grief. Be glad he put his kid first. That means hes a good dad.
I believe that was very selfish of you to ask your boyfriend who has his sons on Saturdays to not have him. That is his blood and not your decision for the amount of time he spends with his child
I would never ask my fiancé to not spend the little time he get with his son I have always know he comes first!!
You absolutely can not love the cow and not love the calf! That man came as a package deal and he accepted your children by moving in with you and your children. He only get to spend time his son one day and you asked him to give it up?! Thats wrong on so many levels. You never, ever ask a man or woman to choose their kids over you because a REAL dad would never do that. My husband’s daughter was born in another country and I petitioned for her to come to America and live with us as the family wasn’t complete until she joined us. She is MY daughter!! I never referred to her as my “stepdaughter”, no she’s my DAUGHTER and not even her biological mother can tell me different!! The worst part is that the kids usually know when you treat them differently than your own kids.