As a mom ive wanted many breaks… But u dont always get one when u have kids… And i would be pissed if my hubby asked me not to get my kids if i only got them once a week…
I was following with the whole need a break thing but then when you mentioned he couldn’t live there because you only have room for your kids I lost track 
kids first, you get a break when they are 18
If those are the only days he gets with his sons, you saying that sounds very selfish.
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He sounds like an amazing dad. I would never in my life tell my husband to not be with his kids at any point nor would I ever have a problem taking care of them. And if he ever said that about my daughter while we dated I would of left his ass too. Your being ridiculous. If you have room and time to take care of your kids and y’all kid together you need to do the same for his or get outta his life.
YES, you were absolutely wrong! You sound extremely selfish! When we choose to become parents our lives are not only about OURSELVES any longer, children should come first, choosing to become a parent comes with the knowledge that we must make certain sacrifices(or at least it should) You were wrong to ask him to sacrifice his time with his son. I truly hope you both can move past this and remain a family, but people need to think before they speak.
If he’s acting this way NOW, hate to say it, but looks like you’ve got a ROUGH ROAD ahead. I sympathize, but maybe it’s for the best. Better child support, vs new baby AND 2 additional babies to boot, , him and his son cause face it his son WILL BE living with you soon.
Y’all I have 5 kids. Sometimes mama needs a day. If she is the one caring for the child when it’s there, she totally has the right to ask for a day. Y’all out here applauding a man doing the least!
My fiance has his son full time. Mine go with their dad most weekends. I would LOVE to have a free weekend and adult time but I signed on for the package deal! All 3 kids are teens so they’ll be out of the house soon enough, with one going to college in August. We can wait and are enjoying the family time.
You can’t expect him not to take his child. Totally unreasonable on your part. I would suggest trying to get the weekends coordinated so they fall together when your kids and his son are with their parent.
I mean the kids sleep right… Enjoy your alone time together then since you knew he had kids too before you allowed that in your life. You obviously kind of getting tired and regretting your decision of being with him without thinking
of the lil things that should mostly matter the kids. Now you can quit whenever you want, but do it soon. For the all y’all kids sake.
I don’t think it is ever ok to ask him not to get his child he only gets to see certain days. You see him more than his child, choose another day to “be alone”. I don’t care if we are five to a room, if my husband had other kiddos, we would make it work. How would you feel if he said he didn’t have room for your kids? You going to make them go live with their father? Now you are adding another to the family. You shouldn’t have dated a man with a child if you weren’t ready to accept them as a packaged deal. I am sorry, but I don’t think it was ok at all to ask him to give up the only day he gets to see “his” kid.
He only gets him 1 day a week as it is…that’s a lot to ask for him to not have his visit. I dont think you’re a horrible person for asking or anything but I think your request was inconsiderate.
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I understand the need for a break but if he only gets him one day a week you weren’t being fair. You get to see your children a lot. Imagine if you only saw your children 1 day a week and he asked you not to get them. If you need a break go do something for yourself. He needs to see his son.
He overreacted by packing and leaving but I would’ve asked if he switch weekends so neither one of your kids two weekends a month. I would never ask someone to pick me over their kids.
“I don’t have the space for five kids”? I was not on your side from the gate but that kinda broke my heart not only for that child but the people who you claim are your family. 
Do you see how you don’t actually want to share your space and life with your boyfriend and his child. It happens, we think we want something, then we get it and realize it’s not what we thought. At least be honest with yourself and him. Good luck.
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Wow! I feel bad for him and his son. You should have never asked him to do that. I get that you need some down time. But that little boy only gets to be with his daddy one day a week. Shame on you!
Good for him not giving up his 1 day a week! Send “your” kids away 1 day a week for some “alone” time!
My grandmother raised 5 kids in a tiny barely 800 sq ft home. And my great grandparents raised 10 and my great grandpas 3 sisters lived there also. Maybe 900 ft. It is what it is ya are a family
It’s how you asked. You simply could have asked for one day for you two to just be together just the two of you with no kids. You both could of found a reasonable solution and not just him having to give up seeing his son. If you asked for a day together maybe he would of suggested that or maybe not but asking to give up seeing his kid when you have your kids all the time is not being considerate of his feelings nor respecting his relationship with his kid. You could have taken a day off and him as well or gotten a babysitter for your kids if you agreed during the week is best who knows what solution you guys would of came up with but you never gave him that option.
They come as a package even with kids your still spending time together if go out and do something as a family. Have evenings once kids are in bed and brilliant dad for choosing son maybe you can book something weekend away etc then theres notice well in advance and a one of but not just cause you want him to
You were not wrong at all. Do not feel guilty. Men do not understand all the hard work we do. So for him it’s easy to have his kid over because you do everything. What I would say to start doing is , stop doing everything. Let your bf make lunch and snack and wash clothes. It’s a fricken lot we do. Do not ever let anyone make you feel guilty or wrong.
Yeah you’re super wrong. Think about how you would have felt had ur babies father (or fathers?)refused to take ur THREE kids for your weekend off.
You’re wrong on every level, and I applaud your (ex?)boyfriend for standing his ground as a parent first and foremost.
#86evilstepmoms
Are you kidding me? Why would you even ever considering asking a father to miss out on time with his child. Completely selfish on you part…
Kids are a package deal you care for them as your own even if your other half is not there. That’s just how it works. You knew he had a son so caring for him should not be a problem. If you didnt want to care for others child then you should not of dated someone with children there is no alone time when you have kids at all. I have taken care of my husbands son since day one and would never think to ask him to pass on a moment with his child cause i need alone time. No we get alone time once the children are in bed.
Definitely wrong in my opinion. I have two stepchildren who moved in with us just 3months after my first son was born. They are not biologically mine, but they are mine nonetheless. He comes as a package deal and that is just the facts of it. I can’t even believe you asked him to not take his son. Being a parent is putting children first. Alone time doesn’t happen. I am 9months PREGNANT and have three kids that I take care of daily. No weekends away, no switching with the other parent. I wouldn’t change it for the world.
Sorry, I’m with him. Parents who are not split have their kids 24/7. Grow up
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Sorry you were wrong. There is no such thing as time off from being a parent. He was right to draw the line.
Wow you guys! She wanted only one day! One! How is she favoring her kids? She doesn’t have hers so she wanted one day to spend alone with her man!
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Well clearly you will have 5 kids in that house if you couldn’t handle it you shouldn’t have gotten knocked up. He was right for packing his things and leaving! One day he gets his son and you try to take it away!! So wrong. You sound selfish.
Blending families is hard. Being pregnant is hard. Needing a break is ok, but asking a man to not see his child is NOT OK! I completely understand needing a break. Use some vacay days. Maybe switch some work days around but never ask a parent not to parent. How would u feel if it was reversed? You both knew the other had kids before you ventured into this relationship.
I don’t think you are wrong for wanting to spend some quality time with your man however… you have the luxury of seeing your children everyday. I think if you would have asked him in advance and made plans for a special weekend for the two of you, it would have come across less inconsiderate. I think there has to be more to the story if this request caused him to pack up his stuff or he has some growing to
do himself. Almost sounds like he was looking for an EXIT.
I think youre in the wrong. You knew what you were getting into when you met. Hopefully you guys can work past this for all the kid!
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His son should be there the weekend you have ur children there. So you have every other weekend off from ALL CHILDREN. I know 4 kids while 7mo pg is super hard. But it’s the best for both parents involved
I think he could have paused and thought about arranging that for one weekend to give you some space. It’s not like you said never from what I think you had said. If he is that sensitive there could be more issues but it’s all hearsay from our end. Hope he cools down and that you patch things up. If he wants-to stay mad then give him space. A balance is needed as he seemed to be real offended.
I have to say that I agree with the boyfriend. You could have arranged a sitter on another night, but his time is obviously limited and if it was me with my kids just the guy I’m with with his kids, they come first. When I have my kids that’s all that matter and same for him with his… what about parents that have their kids 24/7 and work 2 or 3 jobs… it’s just part of it… we get tired and it’s okay to need a break. But not when we gets his kid such a small amount of time… what if it was flipped and someone asked the same of you?
I get needing time! I have 3 stepchildren full time! I have 2 kids, one is old enough to live on his own and we have 1 together! Other than my oldest we have them all the time! You can not demand him not to take his child! Be adult and talk about it!!!
You don’t have space for five kids, but you are pregnant with the 5th? He did the right thing by leaving, seems like you think of his child than any of yours.
It sounds to me that you need to adjust the schedule on days his son comes. But you should not ask him not to see him
His son is his #1 priority. While leaving may have been a little dramatic, he is absolutely right.
Yes, you’re wrong. If the kids were all your shared children, you wouldn’t have that option unless you planned for a sitter. So if you want a date night or something, plan for a sitter.
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I woulda just told him he’s gonna have to watch his kid bc u need a break… but just getting ur kid on Saturday is no time at all so yes in my opinion it was wrong.
I’ll always put my kids above my significant other so if you ask me not to get my son on my scheduled day I’d leave too. He come as a packaged deal, take it or leave it.
Looking at these comments appallding this father .when hes just walked out on his pregnant girlfriend who works and minds his son when she is off . Sounds like alot of u have issues with ur baby daddy’s moving on and before any one says somthing negative I do have 6 children and a step son who’s like one off my own . but as s mum we do need breaks and quality time with our other half s this womsn is also having his baby
Maybe she should have thought about birth control if her kids and his one day with his is to much make room for a new baby but not his son sounds selfish to me
Good on him for choosing his son over his girlfriend, that is dedication.
Have you thought maybe the boy goes to kindy during the week, or the mum has plans on week days. Unfortunately week days are hard to work out, because people have jobs, they have lives & to just change them to suit you isn’t always possible!
You came into this relationship knowing this man had a child, if you didn’t think you could have dealt with a 4th or 5th (coz your pregnant now) child then you shouldn’t have gotten into a relationship with a man with a child. Your request was selfish & I’m so glad that he chose his child. Thats a real man.
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Please explain to me how you have enough room for all YOUR kids including the baby in a couple of months but you can’t make room for his child. You’re dead wrong and I hope the boy doesn’t resent you in the long run. When you choose to have kids or get involved with someone who already has kids, you don’t get to pick and choose when you parent.
The child comes first, he gets him only one day, you might want to discuss that you need a rest and want to not have to look after, cook, and clean up after him and his son, that’s reasonable, but you can’t ask him not to take his child
His child comes first you should be glad he isn’t a dead beat dad he only gets to see him one day a week you get to see him every day it’s not that little boys fault And shouldn’t have to suffer so you can have a break
Sounds like a great guy! Putting his child first as he should.
Girl you were wrong. Sorry. My husband and I have yours , mine, and ours. And we never ask one to do something like that. My kids are his and his kids are mine. When his girls wanted to live with us. Yes was the answer. Now all of our kids are grown. We have grands. And it’s never your kids , my kids. It’s always our kids and grands. If you can’t commit to that then don’t move them in. 
Sorry but dude is right about wanting to see his kid over his girlfriend. Kids come first no matter you get with someone with kids best believe those kids come first. You need to realize that and get over it.
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Your wording was off. Your request was perfectly normal. Just package it better next time. He got defensive instead of curious about why. As are a lot of the women responding to you with malice. Just do it differently next time. I have a step daughter and 2 of my own. We both breaks sometimes. That is normal.
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Yes you’re wrong for asking. Did you offer to have your ex keep the other 3 an extra day so your night together would fall on a time he normally wouldn’t have his son?
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I get your point. I do, and my man has two kids, and so do I. so between the two of us we have four kids. alone time, like real alone time is few and far between, but at the same time my man gets his kids weekends holidays and summer. I love OUR kids emphases on the OUR part. when you got into a relationship and I’m mean a serious one… his kid became yours and vice versa… I understand your tired,and want for alone time. maybe ask 1 weekend every 2 mos. make like a preplanned date night, and ask 1 before the baby comes… this story had a lot of holes. I don’t know exactly what you said, but maybe he mis understood, and probably just springing it on him caught him off guard… that’s something that you need to explain with a lot of detail. cause he may have just taken it wrong, but also you can’t expect him to choose you over his kid. His kid is his number 1 as your kids should be yours and the kids should come before Any spouse or partner… I get needing a break and we get worn out and yeah sounds like maybe you need a break but don’t get greedy and don’t expect him to give up his baby for you…
posts like this make me glad I’m 73. My 2nd husband had 3 children and I had 1 by 1st marriage. from the get go, we decided the only way it would work was to treat all 4 of them equally. All 4 belong to both of us equally. We both worked and had full custody of all 4 all summer. It was hard, but I look back now and wish I could do it again.
That’s your ex’s girlfriend asking him not to take their kids when he is supposed to maybe talk to the boyfriend and make plans for something before the baby is born but she is definitely in the wrong for asking her bf not to take his son
So what you’re really saying is you made him choose between you and his son ?
He puts up with your 3 kids actually living there and hasn’t made you change your days with your kids !
He will be much happier now he chose his son over you because he can see what a selfish woman you are
Yea, your in the wrong on this one. The only time he gets him is in the weekend, and you want him to skip it to be with you? That’s hella selfish.
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I feel like it wasn’t wrong. One time, parents need breaks too.
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But you did ask him to pick his kid over you by asking him to give up the one day a week he got him. So wrong. On top of that depending on his situation giving up days with the child looks bad in a custody hearing…maybe instead you take the day off during week that he has off and send your kids to there dads. Geez when you have kids it’s no longer about your needs and wants.
There is so much wrong with this story. You are in the wrong 100%. Im not sure your BF should stay with you, drawing lines between the kids seems like you don’t want to blend and grow, if you can’t handle that then maybe you shouldn’t date a man with kids. Im shocked that you were surprised he packed up and left.
Sounds like he’s a great father. Hope he finds a good women who doesn’t mind his kids or complains about them on Facebook to strangers
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Oh and I have no idea what alone time is 
I have four kids and could only dream of such a thing. Why don’t you take a book and a chair every now and then and go and hang out somewhere to chill when you don’t have your own children.
Yikes momma.
That’s what you signed up for…
We all want alone time, but that comes when kids are out or you find a babysitter.
I understand you are tired, nobody said it would be easy.
Id be pissed too tbh …you have no right to ask him not to take his child. And if you dont have space for his son to live there, MAKE SPACE. Excluding his son, who seems to like it there with you, is cruel and wrong…you chose to date his father knowing he had a child. Its a package deal…cooking cleaning etc should come natural if you do it for your own children. If you ever want to marry his father , youd become his stepmother. Sounds like you do not deserve that title, imagine how that child would feel if you tell him “we dont have space for you, just my kids and the new baby” …my husband has treated my oldest with love from day one, taking responsibility where he didnt have too…and when we had our first child together that never changed. He provides for her full time as his own child. Hire a babysitter for a couple hours or a day and do something together ! Thats what we do, as no matter what we always have at least one child and soon will always have two out of our 3 24/7 with the oldest being gone 3 days a week.
Yes that was wrong…especially since Sunday is Father’s Day!
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I would never tell my man his kid can’t come just like my man says when we can get alone time if not always time when kids go to bed to watch or play games together. My man loves that my daughter comes over cause makes me happy and then he happy
Wrong of you…
I’m divorced and still single because if someone doesn’t love my children as their own goodbye. Straight up!
He is an awesome Dad. And if he would of gave in you would have wanted him to do something else down the road. You knew he had a son when you got together. So you take the whole package not part of it.
Great! Dad he should never be told not to see his child!
You are completely wrong in even thinking anything about that would be okay! Good for him for packing up his stuff and being a dad!
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I totally understand the exhausted mom feeling but unfortunately you really did ask him to choose you over his child. 
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You should accept his child any day if your children can be around any day. What makes your kids more important then his kids? You 2 are supposed to be a team. I would accept his child as my own and would be welcome anytime. When you got with him i assume you knew he had a child. I get you need a break but just arrange a day that works or make a it work or a certain day but I don’t think it’s right to ask him not to have him on weekends. Maybe once in a while if you make plans.
nope, time without kids helps by being able to get things done & communicate about things too…good luck, but watchiing his child is not him spending time with with child!
Absolutely he had/has the right to be pissed! I would have done the same thing… You did ask him to choose when you asked him to not have him on his weekend! What would you do if her asked you to not have your kids? Maybe you should reconsider being with someone if you don’t have “room” for his child. Being with someone who has a child means helping to care for them when they are with you. Treat him however you would want another woman to treat your children in the same situation! I have ultimate respect for your boyfriend. What a selfish request!
Are you asking for ONE DAY total together just you two, or are you asking him not to take his son on that day for the foreseeable future? I wasn’t sure from the wording. If you are asking for one day total together, kid free, I think that’s understandable. Unfortunately since he only gets his son for one day a week, I can understand why he’d be unwilling to miss that one day. Perhaps he could take Sunday off of work one week so you could have your day together, but he could also get time with his son? It’s great that he’s such a committed father! Surely there’s a compromise getting you both what you need. I hope that you’re able to sit down and come to an aggressive.
He shouldn’t have to give up his one day he had with him. There has to be a different day u guys could spend together. I applaud him for making it known he wants to be with his kid a lot of dads don’t!
High five to the dad.
It takes a special kind of selfish to ask a father to sacrifice his 1 n only day with his son a week when he sees you every day.
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He is right. You knew what you signed up for when you got with him just like he knew what he signed up for. Yall gotta coparent. And that means making sure the kids are happy too.
Wow y’all are quick to judge, like none of you ever needed a day. Maybe it was how you asked or when. Maybe if you had planned a day to spend alone together and not tired right before his day with his son. Every couple needs alone time.
Why don’t he get his son on Sundays when he is off? Also there is nothing wrong with getting a weekend off for both of you’ll before the baby come however asking him to NOT getting his child on the weekends is wrong bc if he work during the weekdays then when is he suppose to get him? If you see your everyday just about but he only get his on the weekends then yes thats unfair? Everyone wish they can have time without the kids sometimes it don’t work like that. Also giving him that ultimatum of him or his son is WRONG. You’ll have to figure something else out but telling him not to get his son isn’t the way. As far as his son wanting to move in but you said it’s no space. Well you’ll should discuss getting a bigger place soon bc no child should want to move in with their parent and be told no for whatever reason. Lastly, as far as you cookng and cleaning and weighing yourself down, tell him to step up and help and with you being due soon maybe you should cut back some hours.
Yes, you were, i would never choose another person over my children. This is your reality, you both have kids and your bringing in a new one, how do you think your kids would feel if he called you and said, i can’t take him the one weekend they get to see him because of another woman. Its not about you, its about how shirking his duties as a dad would make his son feel. Its about that baby looking forward to seeing yall all week and you selfishly saying no because I just need a day without you in my life. Grow up.
Honestly just as you are your a whole package kids and all I understand you want one night but to ask him to completely stop
Getting him on the days he does isn’t fair of you to ask how’d you like it if he done it to you?? I get it’s exhausting working and having babies BUT his son didn’t ask you to have more babies if you didn’t want to take care of his son also along with yours you should have stayed single or got with someone who didn’t have babies I’m not trying to be harsh but your whole post is wrong your wrong …
Oh my. The comments. Honey it okay to need a day. Lord Bless you. When I needed time I had people to care and watch my kids. Dont let the negative commemts get to you.
Since he has Sunday off how about he see if he can switch and have him on Sundays. Maybe you can get a day off when he is off during the week and someone can take your 3 so you can have a day together.
I aould never ask my bf not to take his son at anytime ever, i have 4 kids and he has never done anything but take care of them, we have his son 95% of the time, rather you have the space or not you figure things out. Id pack up and leave if he even suggested i not keep my kids for any reason, and honestly he would walk out on me if i suggested otherwise. Sounds like he has his priorities straight though…
Wow you get to spend time with him every day(maybe not the time you want alone, but how many kids you got?) but he only sees his dad here an there an vice versa, so I would have tried to plan a diff day for alone time
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I understand you need a break… but the guy gets his son once a week. I feel like you shouldn’t have asked that. What if he told u no to your kids? It’s part of being in a relationship when there is a kid involved. If you can’t handle the one day then need to change something in your schedule and not ask him to change one day he gets with his son. 
he’s a great father!
He got up and left and said not picking you over his kid…JUST BECAUSE you asked for A DAY tobe able to spend together? It’s crystal clear…you don’t have to be guilty about it. PREPARE to be strong for yourself and the baby.
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Yes, you are wrong. He only sees him one day a week? He probably feels guilty that he sees your kids more than his own. Even if you had gotten him and suggested a couple hours of getting a babysitter to be alone would have been a better suggestion. Or waited until all kids were there and then got a babysitter for all of them for a couple hours. They would be happy to have some fun time alone without the parents.
Yes you was wrong his child should come 1st and any good woman would know that way to go Dad
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That’s all it took for him to pack up his stuff?? There’s more going on with him. He’s bound to you for life now…maybe the reality is setting in for him and he doesn’t know how to handle it. You both need to communicate…but he needs to grow up.
Years ago my husband and I had a similar situation. I was sick and his kids were at the house. I love them dearly but I couldn’t keep anything down and ran a temp. He told me the kids would win over me. But I’m glad the kids came. Best nurses. I was petrified they would catch it. His daughter said this: Mom2 iff we all lived here we would get it. What’s the big deal? They are now adults and we still speak of it.
I get needed time off. Instead of asking him to give up his visitation with his kid tell him he needs to take off work to watch his own kid so you can go to a resort for a day of rest and relaxation.
You always make room for a child. Plain and simple. If someone has asked me to not take my child I would leave permanently. Biggest red flag there is. Sorry but this is the way it is!!! If I were him I would move out of your life.
Plan a trip before the baby is born if you want to spend time alone. You can’t just decide last minute that you want alone time.
You wasnt wrong to ask. He wants to see his son you want time alone. Change his visitation. Where his son is there when your kids are then when he goes back and your kids vist, you will have free time to enjoy each other.
Having step kids is hard…and you guys aren’t even married. If you asked for a weekend because you are pregnant and exhausted and you are the one taking care of his son, then no. But if he is there as well then yes.
This is something that need to be planned. , not dropped on him last minute
my personal thought would be dont ever ask a man to not take his child first off an possibly consider a babysitter an go to do something fun…ONLY A THOUGHT
I agree his son before a gf. I have always said my kids come first its a package deal.
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