Yea…you expect him to put up with your 3 kids all week but you can’t handle his one child during the weekend? Selfish ass, i honestly hope he leaves you for good
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Yes u were wrong!!! When u have kids THEY COME FIRST!! If that means no free time then so be it!! Especially because he doesn’t have him all the time the way UR kids are there all the time!!! Why don’t u ask ur ex to take ur kids an extra day on ur weekend if u don’t mind it!
I have stage 4 cancer. My husband has not seen his son since March SIP orders. HIS choice. My bonus son lives 2 hours away. We don’t know who his mom let’s in and out of their house AND they live in a city where ppl don’t really wear masks . This is not going to last forever. We err on the side of CAUTION when making the decision which is in fact a matter of life or death. They can talk on the phone & FaceTime. It’s not making him choose to DISOWN the son. SHEESH. This a pandemic.
Yes she was def wrong !!! & basically you was asking him to pick you over his son !!! & I’m glad he told you what he did !!! So many men would of said “ok”
Maybe you could have asked in a different way; say honey could we coordinate the kids schedules so they are all here at once and all gone the following weekend? Cause if you want the time alone then you have to take the time all together.
Not to be mean or anything but in my personal opinion I feel like I understand the anger towards you on his part. If roles were reversed, and you only had your kids every other weekend, and he asked you to not take them so you can have “alone time” would you be happy about his question? I wouldn’t. My daughters dad and I have a standard custody agreement. He gets her every other weekend, every other holiday (depending on the year number) and one month for summer. If I were having only that much time, I wouldn’t ever take a day off. Even if I’m tired and I wanna day off, I’m a mother first. So think in the fathers eyes who have standard visitation. Same thing. It sounds like you are asking him to pick you one time (or so) over his son. To me, that’s wrong. If that’s not how you meant it, fine. I’m not one to judge someone I don’t know. BUT to me, assuming I was in my daughters dads situation, I’d never give up a day or weekend. I personally wouldn’t ever wanna have my child think she’s not before me. Granted I’m a mom of 2 and 2 step kids and I work full time. I’m tired and sometimes exhausted, but I wouldn’t ask or do it. Like I said my personal opinion, And I’m not attacking or trying to be ugly about it.
It’s Father’s Day weekend yes that was wrong…you knew he had a kid when y’all got together and all that so even in general it was wrong. I mean if anything you could talk to him about a weekend together that’s different
My opinion, he needs to try to make the ONE day he has his kid, be his day off…that is the suckiest part of the whole thing!
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Yes I would of packed my bags as well and left. Thar man comes with a son take it all or none at all. No matter how bad it gets. Hire a babysitter and go out to eat but asking him not to take his son. Not a good ideal at all.
Imagine your kids father telling them he can’t take them. You’re wrong your kids yes his is yours to come first.
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It’s definitely wrong. Once you become a parent, alone time is never a guarantee. And when you choose to be with someone, you choose their children too!
All this going on and that us what you choose to focus on? Be thankful he cares about his kid so much. Smh.
Here’s my question: if he cares so much about his child, and wants so much time with him, why isn’t he petitioning the court for more time? Courts are now willing to give dads much more time than just weekends. I’m very confused by his schedule. Especially if he’s working that day…
You could have just asked him to switch his weekends so you had your kids and his at the same time. That would have given the kids a chance to bond as a family and you and your boyfriend a chance to bond as a couple. Asking him to forego seeing his son is not ok. If it’s that simple you could have given up your own weekend with your kids. Sorry.
I’m confused. If her kids are with her ex every other weekend wouldn’t that imply they have every other Sunday together? Not judging just wanting to understand the true circumstances.
Ummm you are 100% wrong! I’d be more concerned if he didn’t have his son on his day off… he did right by putting his child first 
Uhhhh. Yeah. Yeah, you were wrong. Don’t ask a parent to choose anything over their kids. EVER. Maybe ask him to request a day off that the two of you can agree on. When you’ve got kids, you need to be flexible.
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So why not not have YOUR children on the weekend that he doesn’t have his son? While I understand your want for alone time, it’s not really fair to ask something from him that you wouldn’t give yourself. Of course, if you are pregnant BY him, then honestly I would say you dodged a bullet.
When you got with him, you took his son as yours as well…maybe you should have thought about not having room for 5 kids before you got yourself pregnant…I dont blame him for packing up and walking out…at least his kid comes first in his eyes…
So he left cause of that! Humm🤔! Sounds deeper than you are willing to reveal.
Yes in my opinion you are definitely wrong. Kids come first overall. How would you have liked it if he asked you not to see your children.Not only that did you even think of how that could have made his son feel
Can you ask your ex to take YOUR kids on a Sunday so you can have your “alone time?” I get you need a break but this sounds like a new(er) relationship…I wouldn’t have even asked that question. I’m not going to lie, I’m kind of happy that this Dad put his child first…not a lot of them out there.
Yes you did ask him to pick you over his son… you could try to talk to the mom about trading at least one weekend so that he has him two weekends in a row…
I think he over reacted but you were wrong. He sees his son only 1 day a week. It should have been a conversation and not gotten blown out of proportion. I’m sorry maybe you can salvage it by talking like adults. You don’t sound like you have a solid base of a relationship if he can just leave like that especially you being pregnant with his child.
I think it was kinda wrong of you. He obviously values his time with his son.
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He should take his son on Sundays when he is off of work. Whoever on here is saying otherwise is crazy.
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Oh boy, tough question. Here goes I think he was right because that is the arrangement. You may not like me for my answer but he is not going to drop his responsibility but he should not have gotten mad and walk out.
Totally WRONG!! You did basically ask him to choose and how DARE you do that!! If that is the day he gets his son that is his day!!! You better get a grip what a horrible step mom you are!!!
To me I think that you should have discuss this with him beforehand and not wait until last night to ask him if he doesn’t get his son for the weekends. Because then you guys could have came to an agreement on maybe he won’t get his son on some weekends so you guys could spend time together before the baby comes. I have a boyfriend who gets his son only on the weekends, and if I want to do something on the weekend I always talk to him in advance. He usually sees him during the week then because he wants to see his son. Also to me it sounds like you don’t really like taking care of his son. Maybe I’m reading into it too much because I know my dad’s wife hated me when I was little(she still does) and didn’t like to do things for me when he had to work. Hopefully things work out for you guys.
All these comment and she isn’t asking him to choose FFS she asking for one weekend with no children. Hardly bad is it, she has took him on as it says in the post she just wants to spend some time with her man obviously that’s wrong in this group. Your all jumping down her throat for nothing 
This situation is a mess. If you do a lot of listening then he might be ready to listen to you & work something out.
Its not even like you asked for 1 weekend. You straight up asked for him to not get his child on all weekends that you dont have yours. That is crazy. What if he told you to send your kids away mofe often?? Insane right? And to only have weekends is tough enough but to give up more time is insane. You may see it as a break because you get to have your kids with you most of the time but hes in the opposite situation and thts not cool. Also how salty would you as a Mother be if YOUR ex told you he wont wasnt gonna get the kids as much? Yeah not cool, youre wrong. Its ok to need a break, and even some time together but youre asking for way too much. You knew he had a child and if youre gonna have a family that child should become yours too.
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I think you went about this wrong . I see needing an occasional break but what you asked him to cut half the time he usually gets with his kid in half. You could have asked for a one time break and maybe that he tries to get work scheduled so he has more time with his kid and can give you a break.
Wow. That is insanely ignorant. Many parents have their kids all the time. Few if any breaks. You probably shouldnt be having another child if you need every weekend to have a break.
You have 3 and he has 1??? You’re seriously acting like his 1 child is too overwhelming?? Maybe you should leave if you don’t want to be around his son 
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Next time tell him you have plans and for him to get a babysitter if he doesn’t like that tell him to leave
Wow everyone is not getting it. She accepts his kid and she’s not asking him to not have his kid for the day cuz she wants him to choose. It’s a day her kids are gone n she simply asked if maybe he could have a day off too so they could spend time together. Now instead of asking the way she did she should have discussed it in advance if they could plan a day with no kids for the two of them to spend time together. N maybe she can take a day off work instead of asking him to give up his only day with his child. She’s not totally in the wrong but could have handled it better. n as for him he’s an ass for handling it the way he did. Why not just discuss it rather than storming out like a child.
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That’s his child I’d be equally as pissed if a man asked me to do the same n imo when u get together with someone their kids then also become ur kids too n it’s messed up to suggest that they not be “home” for the day just bc u don’t feel like “watching” them 
if u guys are living together shouldn’t u then make sure u have room for 5 kids so that they could stay over? 
I would have maybe suggested just getting a babysitter for a few hours
I’m trying not to be judgmental but seriously- did you think having 4 or 5 kids would be a day at the beach? That is a lot of responsibility, no matter how you look at it. I have no advice at this point, other than get your tubes tied. If you can’t handle you boyfriends child with your 4, then you need to stop having kids. You are in way over your head. Your husbands son shouldn’t be denied visitation with his father because you need a break. Sorry. That is the reality of parenting
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He’s right. I get out 2 or 3 times a year no kids. And his son asking to live there and you saying no is WRONG, buy bunk beds you wanna be with that childs parent he is treated equal with your kids too. If you can’t accept that move on.
He did the right thing. Your kids get him daily while his son only gets him on weekends…my husband and I never have time together with 5 kids but we knew that
Cant weekend be switched so all kids are together.
Its probably the way it was delivered.
Start with I’d love a day for us two.
Hmmm…sounded to me like she was suggesting a temporary schedule change and nothing more. They could have talked about it like adults. There is more to this story …let him go he will be back
You are so extremely selfish. What if he asked you if you could give up your kids during the week so he can have alone time with you? Wow. You could have went about it a WHOLE different way by asking him if maybe you guys could find a sitter for date night or whatever. Not take away his whole damn day. You expect him to be with you with you have 3 kids and not allow him to bring his 1, 1 day of a week ?? Youre going to end up single with 4 kids and 2 baby daddys like that. And so what if his child said he wanted to live there?? You took him on knowing full well he had a child so why the hell would you not do your all the make him feel like he could live there, you said “i dont have room for 5 kids” wtf is that how youll treat the baby too ? If you can fit 4, you can fit 5.
Yes it’s wrong. He sounds like good dad. You shouldn’t have gotten involved with a dad if you needed to be the center of attention. You’re being very selfish.
If he did choose not to take him then it would become habbit and that kid would start to hate both of you I’m glad he choose his son
Yes, you were wrong. His child should absolutely come first. Plan a day when his son isn’t there and pay a sitter for your kids.
My oldest son had his father choose his wife over him. He’s 18 now and they no longer speak. A good spouse or significant other would never ask you to choose between them and one of your children. I understand couples need time too, I’ve been married 10 years, but that’s not the way to do it.
Extremely selfish to ask a man to not get his child because your kids are gone. News flash he was a daddy before he meet you and keep being selfish and jealous of his kids are he will replace you with someone who accepts he is a dad first.
I get what you’re saying but you cannot ever ask a parent not to take their visitation he sees that child one day a week that is not fair to that child for him to ever skip that one day he’s supposed to be spending every other weekend with him and one day during the week and depending on the age he’s supposed to happen for half of all holidays and summer vacation if you guys didn’t get a big enough place then you probably should be looking for something bigger but those children come first every time regardless none of them asked to be born it’s not their job to wait or rearrange their lives for you that’s your job sorry if that’s harsh but that’s reality being a parent is exhausting but it’s 24/7 you don’t get a day off
His kid should come before you. If you need a break away from him and his kid, go see a friend, or stay in your room.
Good for him! Let a man ask me for my kids to go to their dads and not stay home…he would be gone so fast
Honestly? Yes. You are wrong for asking. Don’t take away his ONE day he gets his son. Maybe you should work things out with your ex and give him YOUR kids one extra day a week. Also, if he allows his son to move in with y’all, then it’s his choice. You should be willing to accept that. If you’re not, then no wonder he left. He should break up with you for being so selfish.
I wish my kids Dad could learn a lesson from him. Wow! Great guy. No room for another kid? Your pregnant?
Oh wow…I don’t blame him for leaving. You put him in a position to choose between you and his son. I’m remarried a second time and I told him to never put me in a position to choose between him and my boys because he would lose every time.
Are you aware of the whole situation between him and his baby mama? Maybe these are the only days he can see him. How would you feel if he asked the same of you? You’d most likely pick your kids over him too. He’s got his priorities right, you might wanna rethink yours. You could do some kind of activity for the kids to do on their own so you guys could have time to yourselves, but asking him to not see his kid was inconsiderate. Where there’s a will, there’s a way.
How about switch the weekend day for the day he has off during the week while you’re at work? I get it because I ended up taking care of my exes daughter for 8 years when we had her while he was busy going out, working on his truck boat or 4 wheeler, or sleeping. He was never spending time with her. If he attempted to he would fall asleep. No one knows the full story here.
Why don’t you send your kids to their dad on a day he also doesn’t have his son. Then y’all can have the kid free day since you’re the one asking for it.
Maybe explain that it’s not you don’t want him there you just want all the kids to come over together then be at the other parents house together. From the post is sounds like you just told him you didn’t want his son
If you can’t except his child fulltime then yes … you don’t belong with him or his child. He accepts your children.
He in my eyes was making the right move. That kid deserves his time with his father no matter the reason. How would you feel if your ex husband didn’t take the time with his kids that were stated in the custody agreement? It looks poorly on him for not following through as those are his days for taking responsibility; by you being with him you take on the responsibility because u love together and he takes on the responsibilities of your kids too… I don’t see this was fare to ask of him.
He did the right thing. You are being selfish. You have 4 kids and he never made you choose.
What if all the kids were both of yalls? There’d be no alone time or break unless y’all figure something out. Leaving one child out because it’s the only day he gets is wrong. So dont see his son and HIS son and YOUR KIDS and start seeing them as YALLS kids. Thats how blended families have to work. Period.
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You can’t just push his child aside. If he done that to you, I know you’d lose your mind. Good on him for putting his son first
What about his son that has waited the whole week to spend time with his dad if he didn’t take him he would feel rejected, did you ever think about the child’s feelings?
Yes you were wrong. You cannot ask him to not have his child when he is supposed to have him. You suck
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Yes you were wrong for asking , he is wrong for working on the days he has him both parties need to work on it and come to a equal conclusion.
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You did the right thing! You asked for one day kid free. Should not have been a problem! Let him take care of his own kid! He left? His problem! Move on with your life!! You did nothing wrong!
If you need a break that is understandable but why not see about having his son come over during the week instead of the weekend. That way no one has to choose over anyone
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I don’t even know if I should respond to this because I have an ex boyfriend who I have a child with, and a girlfriend who is now his wife said to him it’s your son or me, he chose her. I don’t blame him at all for packing his bags and leaving, if some guy said to me, it’s your kids or me, I’d pack his bags for him and show him the door. When you’re having a romantic relationship with someone, you’re supposed to accept everything about them, especially their children. Also, if you don’t have room for another child, why did you get pregnant? I have zero sympathy for you
Ask yourself if your husband new girlfriend asked him not to get his kids how would you feel…and mind you he only see him on Saturday…sounds like you need to find a babysitter for date night💁
Yea you are totally wrong how could you ask a dad to give HIS day with his son when he spends everyday with yours. BAD MOVE
If he comes back, plan a trip out of town, especially before the baby is born
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If my now husband ever asked me to to take my kid to have just an us day i would have left too. If he couldn’t look at my kid like his own then he is not the man for me.
On one hand i get where you are coming from and on the other i get y he up and left…but if he has Sunday’s off why would he take his child on a day he has to work amd leaves u the responsibility of taking care of his child there is nothing wrong with wanting to spend one day everyother week with him he has one day of durning the week but chooses noy to spend it woth his son but rather hace him on a sat when he works …
Everyone deserves a break, maybe it was the wording? Is it possible to do a one time switching of schedules to free up time once inawhile?? Asking anyone to give up the only day they have their kid is a lot to ask.
Umm yes you’re wrong! Are you kidding. From your post and your words, it’s obvious you don’t see his son as one of your own or even as part of “your” family. The child is a packaged deal with your boyfriend and I commend your boyfriend for telling you that he will not choose you over his son. You’re wrong to put him in that situation to begin with and should be absolutely ashamed of yourself. I hope you take a deep look into your soul and make room & grow love for this child if you want your relationship to work and not end up with 2 ex-baby daddies.
I think y’all need to have a conversation and listen to each other actively,
I can see it on both sides but I would say he didn’t have to pack and leave. There should have been more conversation had and a better understanding on both sides. I pray y’all get through this seeing that y’all about to have a child together.
He did what any good father did he didn’t let you take control of his parenting
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to answer your question, yes you are wrong. that’s his son. you knew he had him when y’all got together. shame on you.
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I understand you wanting a break sounds like you are dealing with a lot but that’s not fair to the kid and if it’s not fair to him but think about the kid .
I think he took it the wrong way, everyone needs time alone with their spouses
That being said make other time,
Ask your ex to watch your kids an extra day or something
I would have done the same thing in his shoes. You should try and understand how you came off by asking such a thing. It’s an “all or nothing relationship” and he, like “you”, came with baggage. He only has his kid on those weekends, why would you take his time away from him and his son time away from his dad? He should also be able to live there because that is HIS kid and therefore by union…your kid too. Where 4 mouths eat…5 eat. That’s how it always was in my house growing up. 
I just have to disagree with the whole situation and side with your bf. 
if the shoe were on the other foot, he’d be super judged by you and everyone else for being that way.
I think you were wrong! He Only has a very small window w his child and he lives w you! You were being selfish!
I’m confused. You said he gets the son saturday but is at work saturday. He is one weekday and sunday off? Is that correct? So he basically sees him when he gets off and the morning sunday morning and then takes him back? If that is the case? Why doesn’t he just get him on sundays and bring him back monday morning since he has all of sunday off?
If I were you I would have discussed this in advance with him. Explain why you want a day just you and him, pick a day together that works for the both of you etc etc.
Just springing it on him is why he may have acted in the manner that he did
You are in the wrong but, it’s okay. I think your just not finding an actual solution. Why don’t he take his son to get him out of the house and give you alone time? I know I want to spend time together but you’re going to have to find another way. I couldn’t imagine only seeing my kid one day a week, could you?
Yes, your wrong for asking him not to take his kid on his day. His kid deserves to see his dad. Why don’t you make arrangements for your kids to go somewhere else for a day or take a day off from work to spend with him.
He is right!!! Stop having kids if you need time alone, can’t afford them or don’t have space!!!
All of the questions like this seem to say I can’t afford more kids or I don’t have space for more kids but I’m pregnant while trying to figure out how to neglect a kid that’s already here.
All things that should have been discussed before he moved in. Nice to see a dad stick by his child
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Yes you are wrong for asking, I would never in 6 million years choose someone over my children and although you say You’re not asking him to choose you really are 
Yep …you were wrong. He comes with a son that didn’t ask to be here. If you can’t accept his past …you’re in the wrong relationship.
Sorry, i truely know where she is coming from. & Im suspecting, he is not ready for a full relationship. The fact that he packed & left with no discussion, puts you 2nd place.
Of course the child is major important, same as hers, but a relationship is a partnership, a commitment, one day without the kids is not a bad idea. It sounds as hes just not mature enough
While I don’t think you specifically asked him to pick between his son and you… I can see why he would react that way!! I applaud him for his reaction!!
Maybe if you had or could try to explain to him you just need a break! Being a mom, pregnant and working I totally understand the need for a down day and a day to not be “mom” right now!!
Be clear when you talk to him next and try not to attack him!!
You are super wrong. How dare you ask him to choose you over his child.
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I feel likr maybe if the son comes the weekend you havr your kids, it would give them someone to play with and you have time together on the other weekends. I see nothinv wrong in it.
I would try to change the Saturday he comes to be the same time all the kids are there. Nothing wrong with that. I think this scenario is worded funny and coming across the wrong way
Sounds like the time with his son is less than the time with you. Give up one of your days with your children. Not gonna happen right? So don’t expect that of him. Good for him.
I totally get where you and him are coming from. Seems to me it shouldn’t have to be all or none. Why not compromise and do one weekend a month or even a day
Yes it was wrong! Kids come 1st! Maybe you could have just said when he’s at your home it’s your boyfriends responsibility to take care of him etc…