People get for you what they want to get for you and in my opinion the kindergarten rule applies here “You get what you get and you don’t throw a fit.” Don’t want the gift chosen by the giver, don’t tell anyone that you’re pregnant. Problem solved.
At my baby shower we did a raffle. If you brought diapers you got a ticket. Then at the end we drew a ticket and gave that person a gift card to a restaurant. I had twins and didn’t have to buy diapers for 6 months. I had a registry for people that wanted to get something off of that instead. But I was happy with the diapers.
I never had a baby shower. Have 3 kids. So this won’t help you now, but someone else reading it might help. So for baby showers ask for money donations in place of gifts so you can use the money to buy what you need. The real gift is your beautiful baby. Wish you many blessings.
After 3 kids you should have what you need already. Where’s the father? Also… baby number 4 in a recession doesn’t sound very smart especially if you can’t get what you need.
Omg you have to buy stuff for the baby YOU made. No wayyy 
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Only had a registry for first,on your own for subsequent babies
Why should you have a baby registry in the first place? Even for your first child? Or endless baby showers? I got given small gifts for mine, or vouchers for the baby store.
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This just seems incredibly entitled to me. YOU made the decision to have a baby and that means YOU took on the responsibility of caring for that baby. No one else (except the baby’s father) is under any obligation to get you what you “need” for your baby.
-mom of 5-
Etiquette has always dictated that you only have a shower for your first child.
Stop getting knocked up maybe 
Ungrateful?
It is YOUR responsibility
to be prepared for a child that YOU
choose to bring into the world.
No one owes you gifts , be grateful for what is gifted to you, who knows maybe you will discover that a gift that was not on your registry is actually a useful and thoughtful!!
I hear her saying that she had some things. She did a registry to show what she still needed. No one brought things from the registry that she worked on to help her get what she still needed. So her question was - why do a registry if my guests did not use it to get what I need!!
I’ve got 4 children… only got 1 baby shower. Feel lucky you got anything.
They didn’t have to get you anything. It’s nice that they showed up and brought something. Maybe don’t have a shower since they’re so pointless and a waste of time to you. Lesson learned for you and your “friends” I suppose.
You can expect people to buy you a gifts for every pregnancy. 
Maybe they can chip in next time and get those tubes tied
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Who told you to have 4 kids?
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It’s no one else responsibility to get what YOU NEED FOR YOUR BABY! get a grip.
What did you do with all the stuff you had for the first three? You get a shower for your first baby not your fourth.
People generally don’t buy stuff for a 2ed 3ed or 4th baby I got stuff for my 3ed but only cause there was an 11 year age gap an it was still more of a sprinkle then a shower
Back in the day we had one baby shower and that was for first born, if you decided to have more kids that’s on you, you buy everything you need and we didn’t have no registry, you get what you get
I basically let ppl buy whatever they cud afford.i waited and Honestly i got all clothes. I had some stuff from my first like campcot ect. But for both kids i bought my stuff second hand on fb market place and o got amazing deals definitely saved money so i cud buy more. Some family members asked what i needed and gave me money towards it. So like 2 family members gave me money and i put it together to buy my car seat n pram
First baby gets a shower, second one gets a sprinkle… 3rd and 4th… 
to be honest if I’m going to a baby shower I’m going to go to the store and pick out something I think the baby would like probably an outfit something I can afford I’m not even going to look at a registry
Wow the audacity ! having to buy your own stuff for your own child - clearly just rude 
If there were certain items that you desperately need, be honest with your loved ones and only ask for those specific items. A lot of times, the loved ones aren’t sure what is actually needed, especially when there are children already in the home. Some friends/family are only able to afford a box of diapers and/or an outfit but are super excited to be included so keep that in mind as well. It is your job to make absolutely sure without a doubt that you have what you need since you are the parent. Stop being ungrateful for what you’ve been given, especially since it hasn’t been made super clear to your loved ones and they’re only able to get what they can personally afford. The meaning of a baby shower is to celebrate the new life coming, not for you to throw a fit about presents.
I mean, no one told you to have four kids? That’s kind of rude, to expect people to buy everything off your list. You should’ve just put things you needed vs non necessities.
I always throw my baby showers as soon as I find out the gender of the baby. That way if I don’t get what I need I still have months to buy it.
If you can afford 4 kids you shouldn’t need a shower, that is for a first time mom!
WOW. Maybe u should have saved some things from other children. Not everyone else’s responsibility to get what you want
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You’re on your fourth child what more could ya need other than diapers and wipes of course but also remember it is YOUR child not theirs be thankful you got anything at all
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The more kids you have the less people buy for you it seems
I think a lot of things come into play here. How far apart your kiddos are and your preference for gender needs. If you want girly stuff or boy stuff or gender neutral. Registries do take time and effort so I see the frustration in that sense but it’s also only a suggestion and anyone who buys your baby something loves your child and for that you should be grateful for. A “baby shower” is not a bad thing to have for each kiddo because it’s a new life coming and it’s amazing for it to be celebrated. But a full present haul isn’t also done or necessary. I would focus on the big things you need for a baby and let all the rest go it’ll all work out.
What’s the point of having 9 months to prepare and not doing that?
After one baby you should buy your own stuff for your kid instead of expecting someone to buy it for you. WOW!
I think if you express that you NEED necessities hopefully they’ll listen. There are also games you can play at a shower, bring a pack of diapers get entered into a raffle…etc
Ew entitlement:sneezing_face: it’s a gift not obligation. You should be able to provide everything that baby needs and if you cant… well… 
don’t live outside your means.
I didn’t know they did showers and registries after baby one. Nobody’s required to get you anything. It’s a blessing if they do.
If you already have things and the gifts are from a registry, can You take them back in exchange for what you need?? We also went to a consignment shop for kids and we, my DIL ,& I bought several items…some brand new with tags on them.After our first visit, she took several items from the oldest, to put on consignment.
Imagine being this rude…
I can barely afford my kids the things they need. Let alone someone else’s. If I’m invited to a shower unexpectedly I’ll just grab something very useful that I would use.
I believe every baby deserves their own baby shower but by baby number 4 you should know what you’re doing and what baby needs and you should be able to provide that. I feel you should throw a shower to celebrate baby but at this point gifts shouldn’t even be mandatory. Just yikes.
Be thinkful you got something
Next time before you decide to have a child check with your friends and family and make sure they are financially ready to provide the needed things for your baby.
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I don’t understand baby showers. I decided to have children how is it up to all my friends to buy for it. You have months to buy things, why so many people leave things to the last minute is beyond me, then they all cry for help when due date is near and they have nothing.
Entitled much? You aren’t pregnant with your 4th kid, but your 4th child. Since it is #4, there shouldn’t be much that you need. What you “want “ is another whole story. You sound spoiled.
I mean, it’s your baby, you’re responsible for getting what it needs lol. Anything anyone gets you, you should just be thankful for any extras. It’s not their responsibility.
It is a waist of time might as well go buy the stuff yall want yourselves that’s what I had to do
Well probably because its you’re fourth Kid, LOL no offense. But you should have all the baby stuff People normally don’t have baby showers After the second kid or unless there is a huge age gap
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Why are you having children if you need others to provide things. In my day we had a baby shower without a registry and generally people gave cute little outfits and receiving blankets. It’s your responsibility to provide for your child. My parents bought a crib that lasted for both my children. I had only two children because I knew I would not only need to provide daily things but extracurricular activities and most importantly college. I don’t know how people afford having 6 kids.
Sometimes with these registrys the gifts are too expensive for your people. Or they are at a store they can’t get to. I’m sure it will all come together. Don’t stress.
4th child and still having baby showers/registries?? Be grateful for what you are getting from people. Chances are, those things on your registry are things you don’t necessarily NEED but want to make it easier. Diapers, wipes, onesies and a bed, is what you NEED! Don’t expect others who can barely pay their rent, to support your 4th kid. Should have prepared yourself and saved from the other 3 
Wowza at the level of entitlement!
A. No one HAS to get you anything
B. Be thankful of what you do get. Some mamas don’t get any help at all.
One shower per family only one you decided to have more and please no sprinkles so tacky
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Maybe something to consider before getting pregnant. No one is entitled to get you or your 4th child anything. I mean this is literally the worst.
This post screams entitlement After the first 2, you buy your own stuff
No offense……but folks probably already bought it three times.
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No one told you to have 4 kids
You can mark items on registry as must have items but please keep in mind you’ve had three kids prior. It’s no one’s obligation to secure your child’s well-being but you yourself.
A baby shower is usually only for the first child. Where is the stuff from the first three? Should have saved it. People give gifts because they want to and not because they have to. Be thankful if you get anything. People also buy what they can afford. Not what you put on a wish list.
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I only had baby showers (thrown for me by friends/family) for the first girl and first boy.
I have 6 kiddos… the others my husband and myself got everything we needed for OUR babies… if someone got us things I was grateful as that was something I didn’t have to get. Raising babies is hard but by the 4th one you should know that by now.
People probably think that after four kids there should be nothing else you NEED
I hope your ungrateful self gets nothing
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Rarely do people give you a shower for your second baby. Never heard of anybody getting a shower for their four child
Why do you need a baby shower for every kid you have. So if you decide to have a gaggle of kids get your own stuff. And appreciate what you do get and stop griping about what you didn’t get. In my day you only had a shower for your first child
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It’s there IF people want to use it. They didn’t have sex and make a baby, you did. You are responsible for getting the things you need lol anything else is a gift and should be appreciated as such. What an entitled sounding post
You sounds super entitled and ungrateful. You’ve had 3 kids prior, if you were planning more then you should have kept the items you previously used. Let me guess you also sent out your registry to friends and family because you expect them to buy you things you want.
Wow. I’m glad I’m not friends or family with you. Entitled much?? You decided to have another kid. Not the people you invited. Get over yourself.
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Oh no God forbid you gotta take responsibility for your own child
Give had three kids. Why didn’t you save any of your old stuff?
Or u could be grateful ppl r getting u anything at all. Since it’s not their child n not their responsibility.
Yeah hmm baby registries are to show people what you would love to have in an ideal world, but it’s just a suggestion not mandatory just like weddings. A lot of people also aren’t in the financial position to afford anything let alone to buy themselves anything, pay their own bills, or put food on the table. Meat prices are still insane, fruit prices many can’t afford at all, lots of vegetables the same way. Bread and chips half shrunk and cost well over twice as much pre pandemic etc etc. Lots of families have really had to think about moving to more expensive areas to get better paying jobs or to move to better public education areas that homes and rent cost more. These are different times. That a onesie and a gift bag to put in it is a lot to give up and people are happy to give that and excited to give. The trend is also to provide a case of diapers and some people like to make people diaper cakes or find it personal and fun to pick out bibs and cute socks. People are distant from each other and maybe not always friends with each other like old times so maybe they can’t group together in twos or threes and buy a large gift off the registry. I think there are just a lot of factors out there. I wouldn’t think to much into it like you are thinking. And honestly after the first and second kid a lot of people don’t have showers again because people reuse stuff. Or if someone is throwing you a shower you might register for stuff, but after 1 or two kids you don’t look a gift horse in the mouth after that your just happy to have friends and family celebrate with you. Heck I would buy some solid onesies but some puffy paint and have everyone decorate one for the child. Think of the memories of the personal art and wear it too. Don’t think so much into it. And don’t let your hormones take over. And definitely don’t comment about any of it. You don’t want to seem ungrateful. Second hand stores and garage sales are awesome for stuff and it’s fun to search. That’s what I did for my first. And when I was done I sold it all at one huge garage sale and made more than I paid and was able to buy all new clothes for my kid brand new. Stay positive. Everything happens for a reason
If it’s your 4th you shouldn’t have a registry and you should already own most things. Unless you have more than one infant at the same time after the first baby you should be able to reuse everything but diapers wipes and formula/food.
Baby showers are for the first baby only
After reading the comments it seems I’m in the minority. I believe every baby deserves a shower celebration. There’s also ALOT of context here not being clarified. Do your family and friends know a shower was expected? Do they know you NEED the things off the registry? Now would be a good time to maybe start thrifting and yard saleing or buying off marketplace the items you need. I would also look at your registry and maybe pair it down. Does baby NEED a crib, bassinet, swing, etc? No. A good old pack n play with bassinet attachment is perfect. Trust me, as long as baby is fed, clothed, diapered, has a safe sleep environment, and a good carseat that’s all that matters.
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This sounds sooooo ungrateful…
And yes, a registry for baby 4 is pointless because you should have everything you need from baby 1, 2 and 3 (with the exception of having a huge age gap between 3 and 4).
You know what the “cost” is for having a baby at this point. You should be able to “afford” that decision without a baby registry.
I coulda swore baby showers were only for the 1st. Having one for the 4th just seems greedy.
Usually people only have one baby shower not four.
 At that point, you should be using the hammy downs from all the other kids
Don’t make one, then? 
I don’t know if it’s appropriate to register for your 4th child…not sure what your family culture is. But you’re also not really entitled to anyone’s help for the things you need for your baby. It’s very nice if people DO help. But you can always return the items not needed on your registry to exchange for essentials.
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Mom of 4 here, only had a baby shower with my 1st 11 years ago. Define what you NEED. Because realistically, there should only be a carseat and maybe a crib/pack n play. Sounds like you have a lot of WANTS. You should be grateful you’ve received anything, especially since everyone is struggling these days. If you were only worried about certain things, instead of making a registry, you should have specifically listed things that you “NEEDED”. Most people don’t even view registries.
So they didn’t get diapers, wipes, body wash, clothes, nothing baby related?
That’s you don’t have! You said you have nothing!
Or did they not get big ticket pricey items?
Maybe don’t have a FOURTH kid of you can’t provide for it yourself.
Most people don’t do a registry or shower after the 2nd kid
How many years behind the 3rd are there? Also, is this child the opposite sex from the first 3? That’s usually the only time people have actual showers or do a registry. If people are giving you gifts for your 4th child, you should be grateful for whatever they give.
Think you’d have what you need on you’re 4th fckin kid 
get your own stuff and quit whining
You sound horribly ungrateful. You should work on that.
Usually registries and/or showers are only for your first baby. So……I guess I’m not sure why you’re so upset. Take a deep breath and check yourself. This just sounds so selfish.
OP…. Unless there is a large age gap between this child and your other 3, you should have baby stuff. Some of it may be the wrong colors but as I said, the large baby stuff should still be available to you. Needing different clothes, diapers and maybe bottles is no big deal. My best guess is people know you have kids close in age and aren’t buying brand new expensive stuff for you and you’re salty about it.
PS I have two adult kids now. I never had a baby shower with my first but I did have a small surprise shower with my second. What people expect baby showers for every kid boggles my mind.
I mean, a baby shower is a celebration of baby. It shouldn’t be viewed as just a transaction for presents. Nobody owes you anything
Do not get pregnant if you are not financially stable and are counting on others to get what you need for your baby
1st or 15th baby, every baby should be celebrated if that’s what mom wants. It is frustrating making one and no one actually using it. So I understand. You end up with a lot of things that won’t get used, not in your preference ect so it is understandable being frustrated.
This is why you start buying little by little throughout your pregnancy and reuse the things you had from your previous 3… i wouldn’t dream of having a babyshower for a 4th baby unless there was a huge age gap and unexpected.
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What’s pointless is throwing a baby shower EXPECTING people to get you everything you need. That’s not the point of a shower. You wanted this baby you are responsible for getting everything you need for it a shower is for people to GIFT you things they think will help but isn’t a mandatory gift list.
Well, I mean, isn’t it your responsibility? Not to sound too cut throat but relying on everyone else isn’t a very sound idea.
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I think that I would just be grateful for ANYTHING that was given to me. It sucks that you may still need many things but a registry is a wish list. Some people may have excitedly already purchased things for you before your shower was even scheduled or your registry announced. However, these are people who care about you and your child or they wouldn’t have gotten you anything at all. Instead of getting upset, count your blessings.
If this is her 4th child why does she need a baby shower? Just asking. I had 4 kids and only 1 babyshower. I had everything from my previous kids. 1 girl the rest boys
Oh wow are you THAT entitled?? It’s a wish list…not a “You are obligated to buy this for me” list… grow tf up. If you got 4 kids you should be able to provide for them by now. I’m guessing you posted anonymously cause you KNOW you are being greedy and ignorant.
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I didn’t have a baby shower for either of my kids (2.5 year old girl and 15 month old boy) and didn’t get any hand outs what so ever (other than a few trinkets after they were born). I made sure both of my kids had and continue to have what they need as I will do for this next one. I do still have tons of stuff from my first 2, but anything else I need to buy will be done so by myself. I think that anything people get for you, even if it’s diapers and wipes, should be appreciated. You are not entitled to things from people and truly I’d much rather people gift what they want to and makes them happy rather than what I “expect”. Most stuff for babies is super expensive (big stuff anyways, that seems to always be what’s on a registry) and it may not be what they can afford or like. The only time I’ve ever made a “registry” was for Christmas last year because I got tired of telling people what the kids were into. Even then, they got 1 thing off of it and everything else was what people chose. We were all immensely grateful for what we got, not upset about what we didn’t. I’ve taught my kids to be thankful and grateful for the people who show up, not what they bring. Perhaps you need to do the same.
Probably because they assume if you’ve made a whole new baby you’ll be financially ready for it.
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