Why hasn't my boyfriend said I love you?

Has anyone been in a relationship for a year and he hasn't said he loves you? Should I be more understanding (yes he has been burned in the past) or worried??
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If he shows you he cares for you deeply then don’t stress about it. Actions mean so
Much more than words if his actions show it then don’t stress the words

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Why hasn't my boyfriend said I love you?

A year though?! Have you said it? Idk sis! If he showed you that he loves you, then I wouldn’t think too much into it. But you can also ask him. Shyt it’s been a whole year.

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It could be that he’s afraid because maybe past experiences

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He doesn’t love you after a year move on unless you’re ok with casual… but if you’re looking for more than dating it doesn’t sound like he is it

You don’t have to say it to show love. Its only been a year it takes a while to get to know someone I wouldn’t stress it honestly.

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Tell him you love him.

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Ok but what do his actions show? Words don’t matter like actions

I have been in your situation, your boyfriend does not love you, regardless of being scared or a bad past relationship, a man who is in love will let you know!

I wouldnt read to much into it… There is no set time to exchange I love you… After all, its just words… If he shows you that he loves you then he probably does.

Ask him… If its because he has been burned in the past then let him go. hes not ready for a serious relationship. Its not your job to heal him. too many people start new relationships when they are still holding baggage from the past ones… and for whatever reason, too many women want to help him heal… or want a savior to heal her. People need to make sure they are healed from hurt and betrayal before getting with the next person. after a year i would just be at dinner like… hey honey… why dont you ever tell me you love me? and then just be silent… the more you dont talk the more he will feel he needs to explain. after you get the answer, make a choice. some people grow up in a home that they never heard their parents say it … so its not part of their vocabulary , doesn’t necessarily mean he doesn’t love you. but communication is the key. after hearing is answer let him know its something you need. and let him make his choices. good luck.

Took mine about 4 months after me to say it… his previous relationship had ended with her untimely death. A tragic fall down the stairs. She was his only other serious relationship before me. he needed time for that and I was more then willing to wait and understanding about it. When he did say it… I melted. It was perfect. He had chosen a moment when I needed to hear it most.

You can’t put a time limit on saying a phrase. Some people are just very reserved and more conservative with such meaningful words.

If you feel that strongly about it, maybe it’s time to sit down and have a conversation and see where the relationship is headed. See where you both stand and if y’all have the same feelings and are on the same page.

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My mom would say this: if he’s getting the milk for free, he doesnt have to say or do anything to express his love. My mom had a knack for things like that. She watched people, and knew right away.
But she also understood that sometimes actions spoke more than words. Look at your relationship. Has he said it in other ways. Theres a book about love languages. I dont recall the tutle or author. Its a great book to read. I hope you figure this out.

I know a couple who didn’t say I love you until he proposed after 5 years together. To each their own. :woman_shrugging:t4:

Me and my boyfriend have been on and off for years. This is the 1st full year together together. And I always told him dont say it if he doesn’t mean it. Empty words hurt more than not hearing them. Everyone finds the right time to say them doesnt mean he doesnt feel it.

My mom and her boyfriend have been together for 8 or 9 years and they’ve never once said it to each other. They love each other, they just don’t feel the need to say it.

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Because he DOES NOT LOVE YOU. At least he is honest. Most men lie and say love you when they really don’t.

But yes a year that’s way way way way too much!!!

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Because he doesn’t love you? Or he’s too immature?

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Omg. This world just gets dumber and dumber… :woman_facepalming:

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Perhaps he doesn’t love you… shrugsz

Does he show you love by his actions. I say it all the time as does my partner but he does random things to make me smile makes me laugh. Listens to me rant & picks up if I’m having a crap day. Asks how my day has been. The little things go a long way. He’s boosts my confidence picks me up when having a wobble. That means more than a word in my book. Love is just one word a emotion. If he has been burnt before maybe it’s easier to show it than to say it. Tell him how you feel & see if your both on the same page. Ask him what his definition of love is. Could be different to yours but atleast your know where you stand. If you or him both see a long term future together then you need to communicate.

Lets just say its time to move on

I come from an emotionally crippled family and we hardly ever said “I love you” ihas been a challenge to be in a relationship with someone who says it every 5 minutes not just him but his whole family says it… I am trying hard but it still feels super awkward for me and it has been over 3 years. Be patient if he shows you he loves you remember they are just words.

Pretty sure it takes 5 years to get to know someone maybe he’s waiting till he really knows you? Uhm try talking about it communication is everything posting on social media is not going to give you any answers as you see everyone’s got their own suggestions for this topic. I’d rather not be told I love you then being told it and getting treated like shit. Ask yourself are you happy? Is he happy? Do you enjoy eachothers company? Outweigh the pros and cons. How was his childhood growing up? Maybe he wasn’t shown much love and doesn’t know how to say it? Like to us it’s just words maybe he feels he can show you better than tell you.

This may sound cold but maybe he doesn’t love you.

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My boyfriend and I were together for just under a year before we said it. I was waiting on him, he was waiting on me… :woman_shrugging:t2: We were and are, very much in love. Doesn’t have to be rushed.

There’s bigger problems in this world and you’re stressing about you’re boyfriend not saying I love you? Lol ok :ok_hand:

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Is this a serious question? Why not talk to him about it? If you have been with him for a year, at this point in the relationship if he doesn’t say it, he doesn’t feel it. Anyone who says “ I can’t say I love you because I’ve been burned before…” is a liar. Red flags are more apparent than you think.

In 13 years, I heard it 3 times.

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Does he SHOW you that he loves you? Actions speak much louder than words.
Any fool can say the words I love you but, only a man that really loves you shows it in their actions. :heart:

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So tell him you love him and see his reaction

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Actions speak louder then words… so how does he treat u is the question.

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That’s hard to pinpoint. Could be past experiences, maybe he isn’t expressive meaning he’d rather show than tell or maybe he just doesn’t love you. Talk to him about it and decide for yourself.

His love language could be something different :woman_shrugging:

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Actions speak louder than words…. Does he show you he loves you. Maybe that might be more important to him.

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Any man can say 'I love you ’ but not mean it, if he shows you actions speak :100:

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Its only been a year. Some people dont just blurt out the word for fun

Been together for almost 11 yrs, 1 daughter and I’m expecting now our second child and he has NEVER said “I Love you” to me.

He says there’s people that say it and don’t mean it, while there’s some people that feel it and never say it, I’m one of the last ones. He says his feelings are stronger than I can imagine although he never says “I love you”.

33 years and can’t remember the last time!

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Y’all really need to stop accepting less from your partners.

I waited over a year and a half to hear those words. He told me that those words are special and when he said them he really meant them from the bottom of his heart and wasn’t just saying it because it was the thing to do in relationships. . He had been burned in the past and even took a very long time to introduce me to his family. It was worth the wait. I always thought I NEEDED to hear it… honestly his actions always spoke louder than the words. He was worth the wait and the man I plan on marrying. <3

My husband told me after two years almost three… but I knew he loved me by the little things he did. The way he acted. He doesn’t HAVE to say it to show he loves you.

But I do understand it is nice to hear.

Give him time

One of my friends had been married for 30 years and said her husband only told her 3 times that he loved her but he showed her he loved her everyday!

We are going on 6 yrs relationship we just started saying I love you to one another this year! Patience of a saint I have. Some guys don’t like to reveal by verbal emotions some guys would rather show you love on a daily basis.

People cross bridges at different times and some people aren’t good with saying that to others. But actions should be what you look for: Are they considerate, pay attention to my likes and dislikes, communicates, comprehends, etc.

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Years ago, I was in a relationship with a guy that I really loved. He never told me he loved me. Relationship lasted four years And then I ended it after wasting those years

When they love you they will say it!

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If a man can’t say he loves you, be very careful. If you want/need more by now, move on.

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Sometimes guy’s;are litterly like actions are louder than words. Showing you;with gestures they love you. Also it’s;like the saying goes. Once bitten;twice shy.

Only you can go with your instincts. There usually spot on !!

Give him some down right NNAAASSTY puuurrr okurttt freak sex I bet he a say I love u then

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tell him he may be waiting on you to say it like my hubby did I said I love you he said I love you too been wanting to say it

Just be happy. Expectations ruin the moment. If you are happy why do you EXPECT him to say he loves you? Choose the moments that add up to a lifetime if happiness

I was with my ex for 4 years whenever I said “I love you” he would only say “me too”. He never wanted to commit to me, never saw a future with me … he was just comfortable and didn’t want to lose me but also cheated multiple times. I was stupid to stay. Does he do other things that are concerning or is it just that he doesn’t say it back? Maybe he isn’t ready? Maybe he’s scared… pay attention to his actions, not words. Good luck.

48 years and can’t remember the last time

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He doesn’t love you :woman_shrugging:t3:

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Why hasn't my boyfriend said I love you?

Actions speak louder than words, does he show and treat you like he loves you? If he doesn’t then I’d be concerned x

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If he’s been burned in the past then maybe he’s anxious about saying it. Have you said it to him? Does he show affection in other ways.

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Once had a guy friend explain this to me. His theory being the “l” word changes the relationship & often destroys it as it becomes a burden in trying to decipher the other person’s meaning of love…the relationship becomes less about the individuals.8

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My and my boyfriend never said I love u until our daughter was born with us we didn’t have to say it we just knew we loved each other I could tell he loved me because he treats my boys not bio his as his own more than their real dad did

My boyfriend hadn’t said I love you til a year later but I knew in his actions and how he treated me that he loved me. I didn’t need to hear it for me to know.

I mean, the best way to find out would be to ask him…
In German, there are two ways of translating those words; I am aromantic and when I was in a relationship with someone who was bilingual, I’d only say the German version that isn’t (usually) used to connotate romantic love. I wouldn’t say it in English 'cause I don’t feel romantic love and didn’t ever want to give off the impression that I do. Maybe for your partner, too, saying those words would make him feel uncomfortable for whatever reason. If you’re happy with the other aspects of your relationship, maybe just try to accept the situation/accept him.

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It’s not his words ! Love you’s are easy to say , it’s his actions that matter .

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If you want to know why he hasn’t? Ask him straight out face to face. Don’t ask other people. Not trying to sound like a dick

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My husband’s therapist told him love isn’t a feeling but an action. You show someone you love them anyone can say I love you but not everyone’s actions prove they love you

I was with a guy for a year and a half. Lived together for a year and 3 months. Never said I love you, he never kissed me and he never held my hand. He never introduced me to people as his girlfriend either. He told me he didn’t want the “title”

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Maybe he doesn’t? Just ask him!

People have different upbringings. Maybe he’s from a family that doesn’t say it. People also have their own timeframes, maybe it’s too soon for him. Maybe he prefers to show it instead of saying it. Maybe, maybe, maybe. You should ask instead of wondering.

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If he hasnt said it then its because he does not feel it in my harsh opinion.
Situationships*
If its important that he loves you then i would confront it.
But if you are happy let sleeping dogs lay maybe.

But all it depends what you want from hiand what he wants from you. And both understanding each others roles in each others lifes?

Its clearly bothering you… do you understand why it bothers you yet ?

Have a nice romantuc meal make time for each other and have the discussion calmly and curiosly. Do not feel anyway about trying to establish what u have or working towards. Nice cosy night and lots of communication xx

Maybe he doesn’t love you!

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Time to talk to him about it.

Better yet…does he show you he loves you?..actions speak louder than words…if the answer is yes, he shows you…be content .that’s all that matters

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It’s not what he says it how he shows it c

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if he doesnt say it its because he doesnt love you yet. Crappy to accept but might be as simple as that. We try to find 100 reasonable reasons as to why men behave and act the way they do when sometimes its just as simple as they dont love you yet. Sorry :frowning:

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Would you rather he say it and not mean it? Ask him what his feelings for you are exactly but don’t pressure him to say it if he isn’t comfortable for whatever reason. Do you feel that he loves you?

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My 2 view points on this question.

  1. You’ve been in a relationship for a year & he hasn’t told you he loves you? Then he doesn’t love you, move on…
  2. Maybe he shows you he loves you in other ways and? People give & recieve love in different ways. Maybe verbal affection doesn’t do it for him, but he shows you he loves you in other ways.

I’d think he would’ve said it by now but :woman_shrugging: does he show it at least?

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He could be like me. I don’t say to my husband that I love him as often as he says it to me, but I show him that I love him. To me words are just that words. With words you can sugar coat anything, but my darling when it comes to actions, right there is the naked truth of what you need to know.

Do you love him? Do you tell him? True love doesn’t need to be returned. Tell him and say if he’s not ready to say it, you understand.

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Actions have more meaning then actual words do. Does he do things for you that shows that he does?

Sometimes it’s very very hard for people to say that even to their own family members not that they don’t feel loved they just have a hard time saying it they get kind of embarrassed

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It took my now husband a year to say, “Ditto” when I said I Love you. About a year and a half, he finally said it.

He doesn’t love you …even after being burnt …he would def know if he loves you or not …if he can’t say or express it after a year that’s on him …wasting your time …you need a partner after a year together not a project

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No go look for your forever love. You are a convenience at the moment, move out he may miss you then.

Because he doesn’t love you… being hurt in the past is not a good enough reason, we all have been and still say it!

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Sounds like you wanna build a future and he wanna hang out🤷

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How old are you? 12? Good grief. Be an adult and ask him.

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my suggestion Dont rush it…Cause it would never be genuine or real…It will all come naturally when that time comes… i guess you have to know the relationship you in to know for sure that your his only attention. if so… Not to worry…give it time…

Actions are more than words… his love language may not be words of affirmation.

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Some people struggle to say their feelings as long a9s he treats you well I am sure he does love you

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Say it first and see how he responds. Sometimes men wait to

Personally after a year of being together I would expect an I love you within the first year or at least at the year mark. After being with someone for a whole year you definitely know whether or not you love them. I would sit down and have a serious conversation with him about it. And being burned before isn’t an acceptable excuse :woman_shrugging:t2:

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If things are going good… just relax … and say it to him …it’s ok to be the first to share … he might just not know your ready . :woman_shrugging:

Actions are louder than words. Openly expressing his feeling can stem from his upbringing

Daddy says this one is too damaged. There are a bunch of other men in existence. One will turn up.

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I’m a firm believer that when a man is feeling it he will tell you without you having to ask. Don’t chase after anyone! You deserve better than that sis. If you’re looking for more than guessing games quit wasting your time and move on.

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:rofl::joy: he doesn’t love you move on