You make me so thankful for a boyfriend that would take ‘my’ kids to work with him (bc he could if he has to) before he let me miss work. You’re obviously not seeing a future here, you need to go!
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Yes your wrong, he has input with your children so you should your child, you need set ground rules for him as well as your own kids, it maybe he misbehaves because he wants dads time and also jealous your kids have his dad and not him, id say when dads home he needs make a good effort with all the kids and maybe if dad had a chat with the child and say he may not be with him all the time but he loves him very much, children need to be told, its hard when your the outside child and the step family has your mum or dad and not you
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Im a step mom and a bio mom… And I need more info to form my opinion here…
Would I spend my summer with a child who knowingly and purposely disrespected me in my own house? No.
Are there kids who fully intend to go to any length to torment their stepparent and sabotage things? Absolutely.
Are there stepparents with zero intent to give a damn about other kids and push for prioritization of themselves or their own kids? Sadly, yes.
Are either of these the case here?? We don’t know.
There are wayyyy too many other variables.
Honestly we need more info here… custody and living situations as well as duration of this relationship. Age of child. Is the child dealing with ADHD, Autism, ADD, etc…
I have a son with all of the above, who’s 9… and I’d never call his stepdad trash for not wanting to commit to an entire summer of care… I would also never ask unless it was gonna make or break my career…. He’s a great stepdad, but My son is hard work. He also has me and bio dad and our families to handle situations such as summer care. If it came to it for his or mine, we would talk this out. If it can’t be done without straining our marriage, we wouldn’t do it.
I’m not gonna say you’re wrong either way due to lack of info here…but y’all need to sit down and have a serious talk about plans moving forward, Expectations of a blended family, all of it.
Yea this relationship is going to be a disaster
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Maybe this isn’t a wise relationship. A man and his child are a package deal. If you don’t get along with this man’s child and his child makes life miserable for your children, it’s time to move on. I tried the step-parent thing under those circumstances and it was hell for my kids and myself. I’ll never forgive myself for the hell put my kids through. It was never worth it. The guy was cheating on me too. Just break it off before you hate each other.
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Maybe this isn’t a wise relationship. A man and his child are a package deal. If you don’t get along with this man’s child and his child makes life miserable for your children, it’s time to move on. I tried the step-parent thing under those circumstances and it was hell for my kids and myself. I’ll never forgive myself for the hell put my kids through. It was never worth it. The guy was cheating on me too. Just break it off before you hate each other.
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Would it bother you if he didn’t want your kids staying with him ? Yes your wrong af , how do you expect a man to accept you and your kids if you don’t accept his
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I mean depending on if y’all live together or not I would say that’s kinda fucked up.
You need to get your shit straight.
You decided to have this man in your life, with his child inclusive of the package.
You’d expect him to help you.
You need to suck it up and do the same for him.
If you get with a man that has kids then those kids get treated as your own automatically. There is no yours, mine, and ours. Would you not have your own child at home if they were a bit harder to handle ? I’m going to assume no so why do that to his? As an adult and parental figure in that child’s life rear them and help guide them into being somebody better. It isn’t the child’s fault yet the adults in his life that have failed him.
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If you can’t handle the child as your own you should not be with the child’s father. Some children are harder then others.
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Could be a chance for you to help turn his kids behaviour around after he’s been with you & your kids & gets the rules etc, just possible, but some hard work too. good luck
Wrong as to left shoes - WOW!!! So does your boyfriend stay with you and “your” children? If so, then suck it up buttercup just like women hollar it’s a package deal welp men who actually stay in the role as dad and tend to their child or children have that same package deal too…. How sway of you 
You shouldn’t be with him if you dont want to deal with his child or be around him/her. Its a package deal. What if he decides he wants to marry you?
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No well within ya right truth be told its down to him to spend time with his kid not leave said child with u x
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Yep you’re wrong. If you can’t stand his child you have no business being with him. Him and his child are a package deal
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I’m sorry but wouldn’t u want him to treat your kids like his own? Why are u not willing to do the same? If it bothers u that much then u need to leave that relationship & find someone that doesn’t have kids… 
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You take on a partner with a child, you take that child on also.
If you can’t accept that child and love that child as your own then walk away.
Your partner and his child deserve to be loved equally.
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Yes you would be in the wrong!! When you get with someone else whom has kid(s) then you all become one.
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Ummm if y’all live together and in a committed relationship you should be treating his child as yours.
If you don’t live together and don’t want to watch the kid daily it’s fine but if y’all plan on going any further I suggest you build a relationship with that kid, and think differently or just end this relationship. The child needs you love too and if you can’t give that then don’t be in a relationship
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I don’t get women who get with men with kids and treat those kids like outsiders or nonmembers of the family unit. That’s your kid now Sis.
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If you are in a relationship where you live together you should learn to like his child and if that something you don’t think you can do then you should look for another boyfriend or he should be looking for another girlfriend.
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Yes thats wrong… that child’s yours also if you want him to be your partner. Imagine how it would feel if it was the other way around.
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Sounds like you don’t deserve either of them .
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If he isnt hearing you out on fixing his own childs behavior than you might wanna rethink this situation…
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If you can not accept his child, you need to cut ties and walk away. They are a package deal.
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Ohhh wow. I’d drop you in a heart beat. Are you sure that’s really the case? Cause it seems like you just don’t like said child? Maybe it’s your children who act like this?
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Ohhh wow. I’d drop you in a heart beat. Are you sure that’s really the case? Cause it seems like you just don’t like said child? Maybe it’s your children who act like this?
Good thing your not my exs girlfriend cause if I found out you thought or said this about my child you’d have a problem on your hands. He needs to leave you. Period.
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I really think alot of these commenters should join some step mum groups to read some real stories. Not every blended family story is full of rainbows and unicorns and it’s so easy to say “that child is automatically yours and you should love the children like your own” until your in the situation I was definitely one of those people before getting in the situation and reality hit. And despite what many might think it is very possible to be in a happy thriving relationship where each party is raising there own children how they see fit. Look into the Nacho kids method it’s not for everyone but it sure has saved many relationships/marriages and just peoples mental heath in general. You are not wrong for not wanting to watch HIS children I am in so many step parent groups and one of the top problems I read about is the step mum being treated as a live in babysitter. He would have to find other arrangements if you wasn’t in the picture no? It is HIS job to FIX his children’s behaviour so just tell him you won’t be watching them until he does that.
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if you aren’t there for the bad times you don’t deserve to be there for the good
Times … Gotta take the good with the bad 
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l get paid over $165 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $18517 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
M0re Info. https://amazingpay354.pages.dev/
If living under the same roof, all kids should be treated equally although, he could have asked you if you would mind instead of telling you…
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Does not matter how they act. That child is yours now too. My kids don’t get along but that don’t mean I’m gonna hoot one out.
Wow man, some people I swear 
if you can’t be a parent to all of them. Then you don’t need any of them. End rant 
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If you can’t handle the child then there needs to be conversation between you and the dad as too how to handle the child…if you are not willing to take the task on…move on. You should be able to love that child like your own.
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Wait is he supporting you so that you can stay home with YOUR kids but won’t watch his. He needs a new girlfriend
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No your not wrong. He needs to discipline his kid and teach it some respect
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You are a special kind off horrible really. How do you sleep at night?
O honey if you dont like being around his son you should leave this man. Its very hard when you love him but his child could grow up depressed being around grownups that dont like being around him. Ive done the same thing not everyone can take on steps.
Ugh this is why So many “baby mamas” give the new gf hell.
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Take that child In as your own and teach them the right way.
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Pathetic post to be honest.
Can tell you’re type. Of personality. Straight up
It’s all about you and your kids who cares about his its not yours. And that child can probably tell you don’t want him around. That’s why he plays up on you. Seriously you signed up for his child when y’all first started DATING🤮
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Your love is conditional.
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Child care. he pays you !
He’d have to pay elsewhere unless child’s mum is available
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Is he supporting you and your children so you can stay home? But yet you won’t watch his kid while he is working and supporting you. Yes, you are wrong
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I might would consider a trial run with keeping the child. It would need to be explained if there is excessive conflict involving this child then when the week is up, the child would need to go somewhere else.
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Just gonna ask one question and you can answer it to yourself. If one of your own children was bad and disrespectful would you give them away for the day because they don’t get along with everyone else? If it’s a no then the answer to your question is answered. I don’t normally post comments but come on… that’s a child and I’m sure it’s frustrating and difficult but all kids are if you don’t want that type of commitment then I think you let that man go because his child should be treated the same if you all live together.
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Get a new bf
Your bf deserves better
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Accept bi’s child or leave him I have this with My ex woman really is a joke he now doesn’t see none of our children and she doesnt if I was the mother and I so this I be like my child isn’t comming to your hone she clearly treats our son diffrent and I don’t want that for my child he might leave u one day ad he should put is child first not u
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I mean he’s your bf…you should treat his kid as your own or not be with him poor kid 
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Accept boyfriends child or leave him I have this with My ex woman really is a joke he now doesn’t see none of our children and she doesnt if I was the mother and I so this I be like my child isn’t comming to your home she clearly treats our son diffrent and I don’t want that for my child he might leave u one day and he should put is child first not u
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Just be single. Wtf is wrong with you? Your boyfriend deserves better.
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No one likes to be around bratty kids. I get it. But watching this child during the summer is probably the best way to form a bond. Get to know the child, let child get to know you. Have rules that everyone has to follow while they are all home. Don’t play favorites. The child will learn how to act. This could be a good thing 
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I mean…. If you’re thinking to marry him, that child is yours too. You’re ridiculous and wrong. Bond with the child. Maybe he’s feeding off the way you act and treat him and he’s acting accordingly 
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So y’all ain’t serious then huh
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Hell no! I don’t keep disrespectful kids and don’t allow them to be around me like that. Tell him to make other arrangements.
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it’s a complete package, him & his kid/kids, so if you are not willing to watch them, for whatever reason, why should he stay with you??? They are his kid/kids, whether they listen of not, they are still his. So with that said, maybe you should leave or if you live in his place, you need to pack up & leave. Then this way, you don’t have to worry about watching someone else brat 
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How old is his child? Is there an explanation as to why he does not listen, is disrespectful, or doesn’t get along with your children? Kids do not just act that way for no reason. There is always a reason. It might be because his child thinks/feels you’re trying to replace their mom, maybe the child is not getting very little attention so they feel acting out negatively is the way to get it, if this child is an only child - they may not be used to having to share or anyone to play with so they don’t get along with your children, maybe the child does not have punishments at home and gets away with things, etc. So even if there’s a small reason why, there’s always a reason. Get to know his child better and allow his child to get to know you better. Try forming a bond with the child. Establish rules that are equal and fair for all of the kids. If I were in your shoes, I’d watch his child while he works. When you are in a relationship with someone who is a parent, their child is a package deal.
I’d look for fun activities or things to go do with all of the kids instead of just being stuck at home for the summer. Even if you stay home but invest in like a blow up pool or other fun outdoor things for the kids to play with, that would be fun to get the kids outside on the nice, sunny days! 
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If your with somebody and they have kids, guess what? That’s your kids too now. If it was my boyfriend, I would watch that kid in a heartbeat. This could be a good way to get to know them more and maybe figure out why their the way they are. Look at this as a bonding experience for your family.
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your not married you have no duty to
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Don’t do wife things if your not his wife. I love my step son but when we were dating I also had the right to decide if this was right for me.
I spent time with the kids but I didn’t assume caregiver roles before I was sure this was going to be a marriage.
I don’t give it all away upfront emotionally in hopes he will pick me. I continue my life and we dated and took our time.
I didn’t need him to babysit and he didn’t need me because we both maintained our separate lives until we were married. It’s ok for you to have your own boundaries especially because your still dating
I had to deal with my mom dating and I was always grateful she also didn’t allow every man to assume the father role. They met us and we did activities but she did not expect him to assume caregiver roles either. They were just boyfriend and girlfriend’s
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Nope! Not. Wrong. At. All! Nope! Nope! Nope!
No not wrong at all.
If you don’t want to be around his kid (even if it’s for good reason,) you shouldn’t be with him.
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I think it’s very wrong. You went into the relationship knowing he has a kid…grow up
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I think you should break up with him if you don’t like being around his child.
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So if yous ever get married are you just going too push this child too the side? Why are you in a relationship with someone if you cant accept his kid… i get it is frustrating having a child that doesnt listen but its a package deal. You obviously knew he had a kid/kids getting into the relationship
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He is your boyfriend not your husband. The only thing you HAVE to do is respect and care for his child when the child is around. Do you have to volunteer to watch the child outside of that? No. Absolutely not. Specifically if you know how his/her behavior could effect you and your mental state, your own children, the relationship you have with your boyfriend and any relationship you may hope to have with his child. It would definitely open the door for arguments and disagreements with him and put him in a place where he would have to choose between you and his child and NO ONE wants to be in that place. It is completely okay to have boundaries, even when in a relationship. It’s a simple as saying “I do not feel comfortable with this, this is why. I hope you understand.” And if he respects you and your boundaries, he should understand and there should be no argument.
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Is your heart not big enough to love another child? You can’t be in a relationship with someone who has children and only choose to love and spend time with your own and exclude your partners.
I’m guessing you expect your partner to be a loving family man and to be close to your kids & to treat them like his own….
You see the problem here?!?!
Double standards
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Yes… it’s a simple yes, that’s wrong
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If he has custody of his child where do you think this relationship is going? If you can’t take care of his child and teach him some respect then you don’t need this “boyfriend” .
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You picked his child too when you picked him. Remember that. I have a bonus daughter who drives me completely nuts, never listens, doesn’t care, lie, and all the normal things crazy kids do. It’d never tell my man I won’t watch her simply because I don’t want to.
Yes that is wrong as U got with the father knowing he had a package
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You know he has a kid ,he told you his kid is disrespectful, you have your own kids to protect and teach, maybe you should not be with a man that has kids. If you get married to hi. Then you become that child’s step mother ! Then what? Treat it terribly because nobody took the time to teach that kid respect?
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In my opinion… BREAK UP NOW… just save a lot of drama in the future. Cut your losses and be wise.
His child comes with him. And would most assuredly get hurt, So… move on 
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How would you feel if he did that to your kids?
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Yes if your still trying to maintain a relationship, if this is supposed to be long term you adjust. If your just in a “fling” and this isn’t meant to be a “serious Bf” then no. You have to be aware this isn’t a good look……
Well, your with a man who has a child. Just as hes with a woman with kids. Find a way or break up
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Won’t catch me watching anyone’s disrespectful child. Not sorry
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Girl u shouldn’t be n a relationship with this man if u won’t watch his child.
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If this how you have been treating the child the whole time, I can understand the behavior! Just Wow!
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Maybe you guys shouldn’t be together honestly? U have this boyfriend who you obviously live with and he’s been taking care of you and your children who are not his but when he actually needs you you want to say no simply because the child doesn’t listen is disrespectful and doesn’t get along with your children? Girl this child needs love and guidance. If u aren’t willing to watch his child don’t be expecting him to give u money or anything for your children cause he’ll be spending money on daycare
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No because you will have a summer of hell.
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Honey if you married him then that’s your child too. Take this time to learn the good things about your kids and teach him love, respect and how to get along with the rest of his/her siblings
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I don’t think it’s wrong, I’m speaking from experience
Well… it’s a tough call. I think you should at least try for him, if you’re wanting the relationship to work out. Maybe you and your kids would have a positive effect on the boy after he spends more time with yall and he sees you’re treating him like one of them, expecting the same from him, etc. However, don’t be afraid to tell his dad that he needs to figure out something different if you realize it’s just not going to work.
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You are wrong . I could never refuse any child who needs some love and patience along with my children . Maybe you shouldn’t have this working boyfriend either .
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I hope that man knows you feel this way about his child. Do him a favor and leave him. If someone felt this way about my baby I’d want them gone…
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When one has a child they are a packaged deal! No excuses.
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No your not wrong. I am in a blended family. My husband has 2 kids I have 2 we have 1 together. He needs to be respectful of your time . It’s not your responsibility. My husband respects that parenting other children that are not yours is much more challenging. He can at least offer to split the time. I honestly would not jump to break up with him. Blended families are hard but worth it with the right boundaries.
Also if this was me when I first started dating my husband , I would be clear , it’s my summer off to spend special time with my kids. It’s hard on children to also introduce new kids into the family. The kids do deserve to get to spend time with just their mom.
I been happily in a blended family with boundaries for almost 8 years and the kids are now teens. We respect each other and they get the same opportunities as my kids. But we do make it a point to spend time with just our kids once in a while. Because we were a family before all of this.
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If you don’t like his child I highly recommend leaving him now
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He’s a package deal which includes his child. How would you feel if he wanted nothing to do with your children??? You set boundaries with this child & his behavior.
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Kids do feed off of other’s behavior so I kinda get it…. But is he supporting you and your children? If that is the case then yes you are being very disrespectful. Maybe having said child around your c
Children that said child will learn to listen and get alone with others 
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Perhaps your bf sees this as an opportunity for his child to get to know you and your children better? You weren’t clear about whether you and your bf are living together? If you are, then you are pretty much obligated to accept his child into your home just as you expect him to accept yours. If you do not live together, then you might want to see what other arrangements he plans to make if you are not able to watch his child. Keep in mind though, this is the kind of stuff that will be brought up during every argument over and over for years in a relationship.
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Holy moly he takes care of u and urs but u can’t do the man a favor why not try and Bond with this Child he’s a package deal and so are u I feel sorry for this man some children do try and push limits patience, time and love is what this boy sounds like he needs
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Missing a lot of info. “stay with me” or “while he works”. Will u need to find a bed for him, or is this 9:-5:? It sounds like u r not living together.
Is this a young child u & your kids can model good behavior for, a teenager who could be dangerous. How old are your kids? Is there anyone else locally (his family) who can share this with you?
If grandma won’t take the child behavior, neither should you. Might counseling help?
Agree to watch for one week & evaluate if your two families should stick together, or cut your losses and run.
If you’re with your boyfriend, then you’re with his son as well. It’s a package deal. What happens when you live together? you’re going to exclude his son? If you’re home all summer, I’m assuming you live together if he’s the one working…
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Soooo. What happens when y’all get married? That’s still his child, he’s not going anywhere. 
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Is he working to pay the bills while you stay at home with your kids? Are you financially independent? If he is paying the bills then you need to communicate to him and the child behavior expectations. An effort should be attempted.
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I would say give it a try… if he starts acting outta pocket have his dad address it… and if that don’t work then and only then do you address your concers for watching the child all summer…
But don’t go directly to not wanting the kid around