I completely understand her and him talking because they are his parents but I feel like it’s a tad ridiculous that she had to wait until almost midnight to check in on his homework. I’m even a little more upset that his son has his own phone but because he didn’t respond she texted my husband.
I completely understand needing to make sure his work is done, but you could have asked Friday. You could have texted at any point on Saturday but you waited until 11:30?
Co parenting is really important and can be hard sometimes but make sure there are boundaries set so both parties are comfortable
No. Is the short answer. I wouldn’t be upset. Neither of them did anything wrong. 
Um no I wouldn’t be upset. If his son is currently staying at your house, and she’s alone on a Friday night, she very well could have been busy with her own business. She even could have just thought about it as she was getting into bed. It’s just a text, with he focus on the well being of their kid. Cut her some slack. Now, if she was calling and chatting about anything and everything, I’d be bothered. But it’s just a text having to do with co-parenting
I would have or could have text late because I’m up late. I wouldn’t think it’s a big deal
No. I would be annoyed if anyone texted that late, but not upset. Just let it go.
Who tf cares. You act like she was texting trying to come over…
As a mom myself sometimes we forget things and remember certain things at weird times. If that’s all it was was asking if it got done I wouldn’t read to much into it cause the kid probably didn’t do their work and that’s why the kid didn’t answer so she had to ask dad.
Oh stop🙄 get over yourself
Sounds like she did it to avoid you
No, she wasn’t trying to say anything indecent. As a mom I’ve remembered homework is due at like 11pm and said oh crap. Now if it’s happening all the time then yes.
It was just her asking a simple question about homework…I wouldn’t be upset about it. If she habitually texts about things not concerning the child, then that would be an issue.
Does it happen all day every day?
Not everyone runs on the same schedule, perhaps she had a busy day or it was a last minute thought.
She just had to text so she can sleep better knowing that kid completed homework. It means she is a good parent. It was harmless.
Yeah def shouldn’t be upset about it. Maybe she just remembered it had to be done. Maybe it was the first time during the day she had time. It’s quick to send a text. If the kid isn’t answering of course she’d text his dad. This is the last thing I’d be upset about
If she has a history of trying to come between you, being high conflict or trying to stir up nonsense between you… Then yes you have EVERY RIGHT TO BE UPSET.
But if she really forgot and remembered to text it so she wouldn’t forget it. Cut her some slack❤️ your SO can just say yes or no and leave the convo at that.
But if she is sneaky and manipulative. Set solid boundaries.
And just a quick one, go onto warrior Stepmom for Stepmom questions. Here you will get judged without anyone knowing what you’re going through.
People are so funny.
You get busy with after school things and then sometimes remember something late and need the answer.
This is completely harmless.
You need to do some soul searching.
She didn’t do anything out of the norm.
I would have ignored her text until the next morning and just replied with “sorry, I’m usually asleep at that time” then maybe she’ll get the hint in the future to try and text at a more acceptable hour. Nothing to get upset about though.
Sounds like jealousy to me. 
Get over it or find a man who doesn’t have children with someone else . If it’s about the child she should be able to text him at 2am if she needs too
I wouldn’t be upset because their brief conversation wasn’t inappropriate. They’re his parents and maybe she forgot to message earlier in the day. Little ridiculous to be upset or annoyed over them parenting🤷🏻♀️
I dont think its a big deal, maybe that was the first chance she was able, and the fact that she called the father and not the child is probably bc kids tend to lie to us about homework so she was checking with an actual adult!
No, that is stupid to be upset over. I lay awake at night and think of all the stuff I missed too lol. She probably just forgot until that moment. Jealousy is not pretty. She just seemed concerned about her son. Their kids come first. Always.
Consider the source…obviously a few quarts low!!
Uhmm… no! 1130pm she prob just got outta work and was making sure the child got work done, obviously the child didn’t reply to her text because he was prob asleep.
And please text out your circumstances and relationship with her as well. Because you will get pulled apart by women on here.
He is the father and she is the mother, at times like these it sucks being the step parent, but you have to let it go
unfortunately, when you marry someone who has kids, some of this things are expected, At whatever time
You got with a man that has another child with someone else. Deal with it. Sounds like you’re looking for a way to create drama.
& If they coparent well together, you will be the odd man out if you try to start drama between them.
Be the bigger person & encourage that parenting relationship… You get more flies with honey 
I’m a mom & a busy one at that… sometimes things go thru our heads at midnight … she simply was checking because it’s important .
Give Grace people. She wasn’t making a move on him. my goodness.
Not a big deal he can say yes or no or if he’s sleeping he can respond in the morning … u signed up for that life gonna have to deal with it forever
Sometimes I don’t think about stuff until I lay down to go to bed. Maybe this momma is the same way. Maybe she had a busy day and homework totally slipped her mind and she couldn’t sleep until she made sure. As a parent, no matter what time it is, we always worry about our children. And I’m sure she figured her son was sleeping. I don’t see a problem with getting annoyed here.
Not a big deal. Probably when she thought of it and wanted to ask before she forgot. She may have had a busy day herself
You have every right to feel how you feel. You should never ask other people if it’s ok or not. Women need to stop doing this. Talk about it with her and discuss how you are feeling and what you guys can do to make it better.
Jealous much?! It’s their child. Any hours of the day are acceptable when it comes to a child. If that don’t work for you then find a man without a child. Parents need to coparent and communicate and that means at anytime of the day or night, it’s about the child, their needs and their well-being.
Stop being salty… you’re insecure and it shows
It’s probably when she remembered.
We all forget things,they have a child together so she’s always going to be around which you knew when you got with him.
She was probably busy all day and forgot. Who cares…it’s nothing to dwell over. She was just making sure her kid was good.
That’s what parents do, they communicate to ensure the child is getting what they need, etc.
It’s called CO PARENTING!
Your upset because she texted about homework at 11:30p?
Go make your pot of coffee and chill out darlin. It’s not like they were texting at 11:30p trying to get back together.
Come on girl….you are only going to create drama by being like this.
That might have been when she found out about it. I would let it go. They are adults and don’t have a curfew for phone calls or texts.
I’m sorry but that’s ridiculous. You don’t know what kind of day she had. They will always talk, always. It wasn’t anything bad so you will have to learn to be ok with it. And doesn’t look like it’s a normal thing. They have to co parent and sometimes it gets late on us…
Maybe she had a busy day and at that time she was free.
You’re over thinking it, I have two lil boys so I’m ran off my feet most days, sometimes it can be 11-12 at night before something I’d forgot pops into my head. It was purely about homework, don’t stress it.
I think mom’s have it hard enough, let’s just breath. The father could have also asked when he picked up his son if there was anything pending that might need him to follow up with. I’m just saying. Why isn’t the father making himself informed as well?
You defo need a man without a BM
As a step mom myself and having a daughter from a previous relationship this is all I got for you
Good grief, She might have forgotten! She was probably winding down for the night, as moms we go over a list in our heads while laying in bed and she probably just remembered. At least she cares and is trying to make sure they are communicating about their son and his needs.
Man y’all harsh 
but Agreed as parents we have a lot going on.
I mean do you have kids? If mine don’t text me back I’m moving up the chain to the other parent. It’s not just a homework question. His work is overdue, mom is probably annoyed that y’all aren’t staying on top of his schooling and/or schoolwork
Co parenting has no curfew.
That’s between them. I’m not being mean but you don’t interfere with that until she talks about other things besides the child
For me yeah it’s kinda disrespectful my son’s father is married and we had a conversation he asked me politely if it isn’t an emergency to not call after 10 and frankly I talk his wife aka my son’s other momma more than him because we get things done faster he be late lol and all is well with this coparenting at the same time I wouldn’t spazz on him unless there was more to the convo besides the kid
If they can co-parent together, please let them. Put your feelings aside for the child, who needs all his parents, bio & step to be on his side. I wish like hell my parents could’ve co parented my siblings and I. It was a text… it’s not like she was knocking on your door at that hour.
I would be annoyed for sure, but not much you can do. Put your phones on silent and then it won’t disturb anyone 
not worth getting too worked up over. Breathe:heart:
Nope…I wouldn’t be mad because I’ve done that. I’m not looking to hook up…it’s just when I remember. My boyfriend has three kids with his ex…wouldn’t bother me if she texted that late about their kids. You’re reading into it.
Imagine being so petty & unhappy with yourself that you’re mad at your husband & his ex wife for being good parents & making sure their child’s homework is done. Goodness lol you must be a JOY to be around.
Like maybe she finally had a minute to sit down & it came to her? I’m a late night thinker too & that’s usually when everything I forgot to do during the day comes to me.
& it being 11:30- I wouldn’t text my school aged child either? Bc he should be asleep.
hopefully you change or your husband finds a more supportive wife for him & his child.
You’re making a whole lot of something out of nothing.
Nope, sometimes that’s how co parenting works. Also my son is 17, if he’s with his dad and he dont answer his cell, you bet I’ll be calling his dad next! Lol, and if he dont answer, I’m calling his step mom. Luckily me and her get along. I’m grateful for that. If you dont want to be apart of co parenting, you need to find someone without kids.
What if the homework wasn’t complete, gonna wake him at almost midnight to do it?
Wow. It’s homework. Which contributes to your bonus son’s FUTURE.
Sounds like something i would do…being laying down going to bed oh sh!t so and so’s homework! I better text and make sure it got done!
You make it like she was asking him to leave you or something🤣 first, the kid woukd probably say he did it even if he didn’t. Kids. Second maybe she was busy earlier, or forgot, or was working, or doing whatever other 10thousand things a mom does. If you can’t handle your man having a good coparwnt relationship with his sons mother you need to find someone who doesn’t have kids or is a pos baby daddy
Co parenting is a must. But he must also set boundaries with her.
I.e unless an emergency etc please do not message for b.s after this time of day. Her message could have waited to be honest. And yes I co parent. Yes I am a parent in a multi parent situation.
Nope. Happy for the communication about their CHILD.
You text when you have time
You maddd for what agsin
Boundaries need to be set for all of you…would make things flow better…I agree for respectful times to call …have a conversation get it in place
I don’t see this as a big deal at all. I text my boys step mom sometimes late at night lol we all get along and that’s the way it should be.
Petty! Being a parent is a 24/7 job. If that bothers you - don’t cohabitate with someone who has children outside of your relationship. 
You’re definitely right to feel that way. If she doesn’t think of her child until the end of the weekend and feels it’s all right to call close to midnight, that’s wrong. I can understand an emergency. The child was probably asleep already and that’s why he didn’t answer. You’re not wrong to feel like you do. All these women telling you otherwise would probably feel the same!!!
He’s under no obligation to respond that late.
Calm down killer it’s not that serious
I can see both points. Cause I would be curious if I was in the same situation as you. But also there has been plenty of times that I have randomly thought of something like that at the worst time, but I usually communicate with my exs wife instead of my ex so I just tell her sorry it’s late. But sometimes as moms the most random thing can remind you of something out of the blue.
Oh stfu. Grow up or stay single.
Co-parenting is key, it’s not about breaking up and hating each other. If parents can get along for the children only that’s great. She was texting about the son, it wasn’t hey how are you doing and so on.
I co parent with one of my kids dads and he can text me any time of the night I will literally respnd if I’m up and he does the same it amazing. Just remember it’s not about him and her it’s about the son…
She probably forgot.
I’ve sent and received texts between 10-11pm to/from oldest sons dad. 
my husband understands and doesn’t question it. Especially if it’s just about our kiddo. If it was anything else, I could see it being an issue and something would be said.
Have you ever been on the verge of falling asleep and suddenly you remember you forgot something? Or think you forgot something? Maybe the same thing happened with her. And the son probably didn’t answer because he was asleep, hence the text to your husband aka the child’s father
Nope I wouldn’t be upset at all. Mums have a billion things to juggle in their head so I get that she’s probably just remembered late, they’re coparents, they’re communicating about their child, stop being insecure.
She’s a mom…with a thousand things to do.
I’d say she laid down and thought “Oh, crap! Kid’s homework.”
And then texted …
It happens…
You DON’T understand as much as you’re putting out there. Sometimes people get busy home work is important. Maybe she had a hard day and fell asleep woke up and remembered to check, just got I’m from work, maybe she was giving as long as possible for them to finish it. Maybe either had an event that night and barely got in. We don’t know the kids schedule. We all have busy lives and that’s just coparenting. At least she cares enough to make sure because there’s a lot of bum moms out there that could care less. You are letting it bug you because of you’re personal feelings. It doesn’t seem like you and your husband have any huge problems with it or you don’t trust him. If it becomes a habit maybe bring it up and he can ask her to message at a earlier time but once a couple times not a big deal. You went into t h is knowing this child had parents I mean don’t expect them to stop because you’re bugged by it.
They literally have a whole child together… 
I think it’ll be alright.
This whole thing is annoying and your mentality about it is as well. I’m sorry, what are you? A child? Because you are behaving like one. I co-parent with both my bonus babies mom and my eldest sons father. Even after all the drama and bull crap. His sons grades are important! Sometimes my sons grandma messages me at 11pm but I don’t find it weird, if she’s asking a question about my son I’m more than happy to answer and help because that’s MY son. Don’t get with men who have children if you are just going to behave like a child over trivial things like times when messages can be sent. This isn’t about YOU girlfriend, it’s about your partners sons homework. I’m not bashing you, but your jealous is misplaced and it’s ignorant.
Couldve just dawned on her we all have brain farts sometimes
Parenting is exhausting. She probably had just thought about it at that time before she went to bed. Chill out she already had your husband and probably has no desire to have him back.
Honestly I agree with you. Regardless if they share a child or not there are boundaries and that’s crossing the line
I forget things at the last minute every day. Im glad shes being a responsible mom.
I sense you have a more insecurities
It’s called people forget. I wouldn’t be upset about it. Sounds like you’re a tad bit jealous honestly. Grow up seriously cause if you’re this upset about a MOM texting the DAD about THEIR child homework being done or not then who knows what else you’ll be upset abt cause this text was a minor thing not this huge thing.
Why is she texting him so late? That would bother me also…the time is too late for that.
Although I agree about how late it is, you’re on here posting as if he’s cheating or something. You must have an amazing relationship if THIS is what you’re complaining over. Otherwise, I think it’s a tad ridiculous to be mad over something this petty. 11:30pm or 4:15am, it doesn’t matter. Sheesh.
If this is the first time no. But explain to her there are boundaries and you would appreciate her communicating with their son (if he is old enough) and him if need/emergency/etc between the hours of 7am-7pm. Thank her for respecting you and your marriage 
I forget all the time and text my ex at random times. But it’ll only be about the kids. If my man now had an issue with my ex texting me about the kids he wouldn’t be my man anymore because the kids and our coparenting come first regardless of the time.
What a things to be upset about,save you’re strength for the big stuff
This is one of those pick your battles situations… it was 1130, not 2am. It was a text, she didn’t call an old house line ringing 4 phones & waking the whole house. Just don’t reply & the next day he says “hey Suzy, you texted kina late last night. Moving forward let’s have a 10pm cutoff unless it’s an emergency”. Women get too fuckin crazy over some stupid shit that is really of no significance… it’s his job to set boundaries with his ex & if your uncomfortable with them you take it up with him, not her.
I text my kids dad whenever I remember something, no matter the time. If I don’t, I may forget and never ask/tell him what needs to be.
Sometimes I forget to check with my daughter’s dad on things, so I do it as soon as I remember. Don’t be a crazy person, she was checking on something in regards to her own child. My daughter’s dad and I know we each have full access to our daughter or information about her at any time when she is with the other parent, that’s part of coparenting. Step back and let the parents do their job if you don’t want to be supportive because it’s not done on your time frame.
You new he had a child with ex so I see no problem her being concerned.