It’s weed. People will quit, but only if they want to quit.
It’s nothing like an addiction to pills, heroin or meth where a person ends up sick.
Maybe you should start smoking weed again… Sheesh! 
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Definitely overreacting. Eat an edible, sit back and relax and enjoy 
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It’s a game chamger for me. I don’t date pot heads. I don’t need someone wasting money on habits when they can go bills , family outings etc
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Hell to the no people can say oh it’s over it’s only weed and that you’re overreacting you are not it’s a safety issue with kids if he’s totally checked out and God forbid something of an emergency would happen his reaction time is going to be slowed by the weed that’s a fact I think that’s a danger to kids and so does CYFD I know couples who have taken their kids away because both of them are potheads and smoke way too much
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It might be only weed now, but it will lead to bigger stuff
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Get over it. It’s just weed Could be worse.
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I don’t see a problem with weed. It’s doing it all day I have a problem with. My 21 year old does it. But he does it for pain relief. I prefer the weed over the pain pills any day. Mabie ask him to slow down during the day.
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If he can’t do anything without smoking weed he has a damn problem. You are not overreacting when it comes to your kids. I would talk to him about slowing down a little.
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I think it’s a problem is he it’s literally all he does. You don’t need to be high 24/7. Maybe he needs to go get a prescription for it before there’s trouble involved
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He works. He smokes at home. Atleast he has a job and is at home.
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I smoke all day and function like normal . He must be smoking too much at a time a few hits here and there throughout the day and he can feel good and still function . He must be really overdoing it
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He is overdoing it for sure I have family members that do it but still have jobs and function normally and u would never know they did it if u met them I have a ton of people that don’t know these family members do it even some of my other family members don’t even know so yes if he isn’t able to function on it he has a problem that needs to be dealt with for sure for the safety of the kids and if he drives for himself and u as well
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If he needs it, it’s a problem
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Is not a big deal UNLESS it’s a big deal to YOU, set YOUR limits, especially for your kids. Some people don’t care, some people do. If he respects you, he will at least cut down, if not, you don’t need your kids seeing you be disrespected for what you feel is correct
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Get him to find a strain of bud that won’t make him feel lousy. My hubby won’t give up so a good strain that keeps him much aware but same high helps.
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Sounds like he’s functioning to me. Relax Mama. Just try and keep him from driving.
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It’s not going to lead to harder drugs.
You can’t be physically addicted to it. You can prefer to be high all the time, but it’s not the same as your body physically craving it like it would harder drugs.
I know some people who function just fine while high… Me on the other hand, I can’t. I don’t trust myself when high to be in any sort of position where I may be needed to drive or make serious decisions. If you feel this isn’t working for you and your children, address it and come to a compromise or separate. Don’t let anyone make you feel bad for wanting a sober person around your babies. I feel the same way about alcohol, which is less frowned upon by society.
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Your feelings are valid. Others don’t have to agree for you to feel like you do. If it causes stress it’s a problem and honestly I would feel like you in the same situation.
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If it really bothers you that much then I would leave. Im literally in the same position as you my husband smokes all day everyday. I hate it but I learned to get over it because it’s something I knew I signed up for I can’t change his ways. Think about it like that
Mostly I would be concerned for your children. Unless he smokes in a well ventilated place the second hand smoke could cause more respiratory infections. I know as an adult I can’t be around any kind of second hand smoke because I have severe asthma. I assume my asthma was caused by second hand smoke due to both of my parents smoking all the time.
sounds like he doesn’t see this as a problem and you do? maybe time to move on.
Sativa strains make u more awake and alert. Indicas are for night time. He might be uneducated about the strains . A lot of people are.
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Weed is not addictive!
Just tell him to not smoke whilst he’s got the kids or at least smoke a lot less when he is with them
You’re not being too sensitive. You have every right to feel how you feel. I would leave if you’ve already tried to talk to him about this and he shows no care for your feelings
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Your child is seeing ,hearing, and feeling this! Remember that!
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It’s called love bombing. It’s a tactic narcissist use to keep you confused. You can see how well it works until it doesn’t. Then the name calling and abuse will kick in. Cause see now your addicted to the love bombing. It’s a cycle of a chronic narcissist.
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Lol… when I didn’t know mine was on the phone I got bashed so hard I couldn’t hear for 3 days… I feel you… I’m still stuck in mine. But it seems as you two have hit a bit of a rough patch… as you say only lately you have been arguing over financial etc so maybe it’s temporary, if you guys didn’t really have tension before hand and you have been through ups and downs before and everything has been smooth… if this is just behaviour that’s come up now then I would try and give you both space maybe take a day or two away from eachother or go a week away somewhere with your kids, if you only have started seeing eachother then this is the real him coming out and I’d walk away… but if it’s new behaviour I would suggest space apart until you start to miss eachother or financial things start easing and go from there …
The world will get more stricter with the way we live and problems will always come about, it’s how we sit through it and work it out and communicate is what makes us stronger and makes the relationship work… after you both just stay away from eachother for a few days, even if it’s to stay with a grandma or something… time apart because you only have eachother to take your stresses out on…see how it goes for 2 months and if you cannot rid the tension away… leave… otherwise you will end up like me… a year later and I fear love
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Don’t put up with it, not good emotionally for you and your family
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No its not normal behaviour and you’re not being over sensitive.
Of course he may be stressed but im sure you are too and fighting is solving nothing
It also sounds as if he’s had anger management issues from the start and thats getting worse.
Aggressive behaviour always escalates. If he wont talk to you and seek help for his issues then id leave.
Dont get stuck for years with your child growing up watching you get abused…woman’s refuge will help you resettle and it may just be the action he needs to have a long hard look at himself .
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Why are you being so sensitive? It’s exhausting and sad to make a problem out of life…
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Sound like you’re in another abusive relationship! Either he needs help or you and your child need to get away from him!
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It’s not “normal” for someone to take out their negative feelings on you in any circumstance.
Unfortunately most people are not taught this! You should talk to him and set a boundary. If he does this again, you’re out!
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You don’t handle it and get out of there. You even said it yourself that it’s completely unfair your child has to witness this. So this isn’t about you anymore since your child is witnessing it.
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Your child is acting out and getting into everything because they see how their father is acting. Pack your stuff and leave go stay with family. Or get a restraining order on him and kick him out . You and your kid deserve better you are being abused
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As far as giving a 2 weeks notice for work did you have another job lined up? If you’re already having money problems that might be part of the problem.
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He doesn’t sound like the sweetest most caring person like you stated at the beginning of your post.
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Are you in my marriage? It is so exhausting. I’ve literally had enough and started sticking up for myself. However I work and since we are struggling will pick up hours. My thoughts are to have another job lined up before giving your 2 weeks. If it continues then you have to make some hard decisions
Its hard to say having limited information but one thing I know for sure… sometimes people just become overwhelmed with everything life throws at you, and taking a small break to breathe and get some rest might be a good idea. Maybe go away somewhere for 1-2 weeks and see how you both feel after it. Sometimes space gives clarity!
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Mama… you already know what you should do
Do it before it gets worse and your son gets older and witness more
And thinks that is a “normal” relationship
If you don’t want to leave him you both need to sit down and have a serious conversation and set your boundaries mama.
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No that’s absolutely NOT normal. My ex acted exactly like that right before the physical abuse started…he should NEVER make you feel that way. Verbal abuse and emotional abuse are just as bad if not worst. My black eyes went away but words and actions stay forever. I suggest you two get counseling or part ways before it gets worst…I’m sorry you’re going through this.
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it only gets worse been through all that
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Try counseling, sounds like not much communication going on.
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The Best advice I can give you is listen to your gut. Whatever it is telling you, do it. Your intuition (gut) is 100% correct 100% of the time. I wish you Love and Light and I hope this helps. And for the record, No your child doesn’t need to see what is going on. The kids feel deeper than what adults give them credit for and they know there is something wrong…
Mama stand your ground. This is not good for you to be around nor your children. Do you want your little ones to see this is how you love? Do you want them to recreate what they are watching?
I’m not trying to say this to be rude I’m saying this to be real. I grew up thinking that that was how love was. My parents fought all the time. As a child it gave me a lot of problems. The anxiety of never knowing what the mood was going to be. It has literally affected me in my adulthood. It’s taken me a long time to get over and to work through and to realize that it wasn’t my fault.
Couples therapy can help you learn to communicate more effectively
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Sounds like your both frustrated. Also seems like no communication taking place. Perhaps have a go at counseling like some previously said, before breaking up your family. It’s hard to go back once you’ve pulled the plug.
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you went from one abusive relationship to another, Sorry to tell you this, He is NOT the sweetest, caring man who thought you knew. Either stay in this marriage thinking it is going to change, which it has for the worst & only going to get even worst or leave. Your choice & only you can decide what is best for you
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Run, run, run. It only gets worse from here, my ex was exactly the same way and he walked out on me and our 3 kids. Ever since, I’ve been happier but my oldest, 4, has been really struggling with why daddy isn’t coming home.
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This is what I am seeing…you want to quit your job because you are unhsppy…but he is frustrated with you over that because yall need the money…he snapped at you because you were talking while he is on the phone…he got frustrated with you because you got frustrated with your child…he got irritated with you because you wouldn’t have sex with him (how many times have you turned him down?) There is a LOT of cause and effect going on here… and it isnt your husband. I think you need to take a good look at yourself…and seek professional help before deeming this husband and this marriage abusive.
I have been through this as well, it will never end. Now he passed away and the bruises gone, the words he use to throw at me is there all the time now
It’s been 12 years and I don’t want another man. I was in my early 30s when he passed, you think I would of found love. But no. He really took alot from me.
So get out!!!
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The question is how to you handle your ups and downs? It’s not 
the problem. Find a better job before you leave your current job
Sounds just like my ex.
Are you sure he’s the sweetest most caring man???
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Leave and give him an ultamation b 4 going back tell him your not going through that again.x good luck.x
A therapist is what you need not Facebook!!!
He’s definitely not the sweetest.
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Maybe extend some grace?
Maybe he is worried about you leaving your job because of the money issues you mentioned? Leaving your job without something else lined up would cause more stress for him.
If you know that him being nice is his form of apology, maybe accept it?
I was not raised in a family that apologized. I used to do the same thing to my husband. If I did something that hurt him I would be super nice to apologize. It wasn’t until he said he likes to hear it verbalized that I switched to verbally telling him. Even then it took a lot of time. We’ve been together since 2007 I’m pretty sure I’m an apology pro now. Lol!
It would help for you to talk to him about his form of apology?
As far as your child goes… Talk about that too!
A marriage takes LOTS of patience and love and hard work. I’d recommend before running away from this one you try to communicate with him and find a therapist if that doesn’t work.
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That sounds like narcissistic behavior and would really reevaluate how much you love yourself and then figure out if it’s time to call it.
Join Surviving my Narcissist and see if any other stories resonate with you.
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That’s not fair for him to talk to you like that. Or in front of your child. Money issue can put a strain on any relationship/marriage. But he’s not communicating with you, he’s yelling and being cruel to you. Before leaving you leave your current job, you should have another job lined up. That’s probably what made him upset, especially since you already mention money issues.
I know the feeling 
I would be mad about my s/o for trying to quit their job without something else lined up too.
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Very normal relationship…ups and downs. Respond to him by not responding. You both are in need of therapy…you are carrying your past relationship with this. It’s not his fault your past was not good. He doesn’t need to prove he is better…on the other hand…he may be no different than your ex. So, you are the problem also! Change it! Get help. Remove yourself.
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Sounds like yall are having financial issues. Maybe stress. Yall may need some kind of outlets instead of snapping at eachother
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Uhm maybe talk to him. Like actually talk, not attack or be frustrated when you do so, making it seem like you are. Males are human too. They are allowed ups and downs just like us… but never mind you’ll pack your bag and your child’s bag like everyone is saying and disrupt your child’s life more than it already has because you probably think you’ve “talked to him” instead of at him. All of these “slay the males” females trip me out. You gotta work for yourself and your relationship.
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I think he needs to get on some
Medication and to get into counseling together. What he is doing is abusive. If he won’t get into counseling and try to change it is probably time to go.
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Even though your husband sounds like as A**HOLE, he was probably right about you keeping your job. If y’all are having money trouble,
WHY would you try to quit your job without having another one lined up just because you aren’t happy there?
You’ll find a LOT if people aren’t happy at their jobs but they suck it the hell up so they can pay their bills. Also, maybe you would benefit from some type of therapy.
Unmedicated untreated bipolar?
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sounds to me like he is a narcissist be careful
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Sounds a lot more like a narcissistic personality than a sweet one. Know your worth.Good luck sweetie.
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LEAVE him. It’s just going to get worse.
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A past relationship where the bar is low or the lowest may make your next relationship seem a lot better when really it’s just a small step above. Therapy and healing properly from the last before the next could better ensure you don’t except another abusive situation that’s only appears better.
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He sounds like a narcissist ass with how he is treating you.
You know the signs, you’ve been here before. Is he always this way? No. But that doesn’t mean it’s ok when he is.
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Togetherness is hard work.
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- never, ever, ever, quit a job without a new one already lined up. 2) if you don’t like your job, brush up your resume and get a new one. 3) your husband is a narcissist and you do need to pack up and leave. You have effectively fallen for the same kind of emotional abuse you suffered in your previous relationship. You are modeling behavior for your child that will keep this cycle going into the next generation. Get on point 2, then take action with point 1 and then get the heck out.
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It may be time to speak with a professional. You two need to actually talk some things out. If you guys are financially stressed that’s going to cause problems. Also it doesn’t sound like either of you communicate well. What was the conversation surrounding your two weeks and taking it back? We all have stressors and they affect all of us. Personally if I was him and we were financially not good and then my partner put in their two weeks and you don’t mention having another job lined up I would be stressed to the max esp with a child. I’d be short with my partner for putting all of the financial strain on me. If you need another job then start searching for a job that’s better before you just up and leave if at all possible. Partners aren’t mind readers so tell him hey you hurt me when you did/ said XYZ I was unaware you were on the phone. In the future give me a heads up. If you aren’t feeling sex then don’t do it stand your ground on that.
Maybe he’s just reacting to your unstable behavior. Quitting your job, snapping at your kid, cutting off the bedroom activities.
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You are dealing with a narcissistic person and It doesn’t get better, you need to leave while your child is still little.
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That is what you call controlling.
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Maybe you guys need some time together just the two of you. Seems like there are lots of stressors going on and sometimes it’s good to step back and refocus.
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I’m not saying your feelings aren’t valid or that you don’t deserve to be treated better— but with just the information you’ve provided in the short snippet above… my mind does not go automatically to abuse. It sounds like you are both over stressed— with finances, you hating your job, add a young child to that mix and it sounds like you’re both stretched thin. Just like you snapping at your child out of exhaustion— it’s possible him snapping at you while he was on the phone was a knee jerk reaction. I can recall a time or a million I’ve done this to my kids. I honestly hardly ever apologize after I realize they didn’t know I was on the phone. Once the moment is over… it’s out of sight out of mind for me. If you’re ready to quit your job when y’all are already strapped financially and you haven’t lined up other work or tried to help him figure out how to increase the household income— it’s possible he doesn’t feel valued or appreciated. Y’all both probably need some time to reflect and recenter yourselves. Breathe and take it one day at a time. Try not to let the stress from one day carry over into the next.
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Sit down and talk to him! COMMUNICATION is key to any healthy relationship. It is insane how often people’s advice is to “leave” the moment things get tough. At that rate, marriage wouldn’t exist anymore. Sit your husband down and explain to him how you feel. Ask him how he is feeling and if there is something he is going through that he might be unfairly projecting onto you.
Now, as far as your job goes, I agree with your husband. You have a child to think about and bills to be paid. Quitting a job without another one lined up is irrational. I understand you might be miserable but you have to hang in there a little bit more until you find another one. Your husband might have felt overwhelmed with the financial aspect of it and worrying if his income would cover everything…
Bottom line, TALK TO YOUR HUSBAND. I wish you the best and hope things get better!
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You’re fighting about money, and you quit your job without another lined up. Yes, he got angry. Wouldn’t you if the tables were reversed? And rather than fuss at the kid, get up and deal. Move them, distract them. Maybe he is just tired of hearing you whine too.
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You teach people how to treat you.
I wouldn’t ask for advice from strangers most people are just going to assume you’re in the right and tell you to leave your relationship!
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Domestic Violence isn’t just physical its mental too, my partner is the same and he makes me feel horrible about everything I do but all I do is my best to look after him and our son but it’s never good enough, it’s mentally and physically draining, staying In relationships like this will hurt more than it will to leave
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He may seem like the greatest husband but in your heart you know that he is abusing you.
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Narcissist through and through
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Has it been going on for a while? I know the last 2 months everyone has been on edge. Sit down and talk to him. All men guilt trip. I haven’t came a cross one that hasn’t. Maybe take a step back and think. Sounds like he’s stressing but it doesn’t make it right.
God didn’t put us here to except any type of abuse 
. Life issues is hard enough, .
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What u take will always happen. Change it. Get better job. Go outside and enjoy life. Don’t accept his abuse anymore. Make changes for ur best life.
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If you can’t sit down with your husband and talk about the things that bother you, if he refuses to listen and doesn’t change his ways, then I’m sorry to say hun, but he never will, and you need to get out. Or stay and deal with this, the way it is, for as long as you can handle it. Either way, I wish you luck!
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Honestly it sounds like he is just overwhelmed and probably feels like the weight of everything is on him. See if there is anything you can do to take the load off of him. You can also try talking to him
Lots of men can develop mental problems in their 20s that was not present in childhood & teen years.
I would look into his family history to see if there’s any mental illness, & if so what. Then have him see a doctor to discuss these issues.
They are not always “severe” & most times they can live a normal happy life when they figure out the problem. But it’s mostly due to the chemical imbalances that happen as more adult hormones take over. Add in work, relationship, kids, responsibility & it just becomes to much to handle without professional help.
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Do you not have another job lined up before putting in the two weeks notice? Did you talk to him about losing the income and discuss it or just say your not happy and quit? After the years we’ve been together when my husband wants quiet on the phone he goes outside. Are you communicating with him about how you feel or just bottling it all up to leave? If you want to leave then do it but you should at least communicate first.
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Save your money and get out unless you want your child to repeat what is happening to you
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The fact you wanna leave for a bit is a sign maybe you should. Put your foot down and tell him you’re done with how he treats you if he’s willing to go to couples therapy with you and work it out that’s fine but if he goes right back to his old ways leave again and stick to it.
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