Am I wrong for wanting to meet my exes girlfriend?

You should absolutely meet her you need to know who is keeping your children in more meaningful then one you never know what could happen to them in her care you need to know what she looks like and see who she I with the children , absolutely. Find our who she is ,

I say you are 150% right!! You do need to meet her and you are not crazy for not letting just anyone pickup from daycare

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Yes, you are wrong to request/require/demand it. You trust him with the children staying at his house, trust his judgement. Do your kids ever go and play at a friend’s house ? Have you met the parents ? Dont make trouble …

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Fyi, going to work is NOT neglecting his kids. Yes you have a right to meet the GF. But you don’t have a right to say he isn’t a good parent because he works to support those kids and himself.

Honestly I would’ve never let it even get that far with my child and new gf! I’m not in this situation but I have been the other gf helping take care of kids that were to a previous relationship… to me I would have to meet said gf way before she even meets my child for one! But I was more than willing to meet the mother of the kids I did help take care of in the past! Honestly I thought that was the best way to handle the situation & let mom know that even though I’m not her that I do really care about those kids & want the best for them as well! I thinking being open in such a situation squashed some awkwardness… showing I’m not try to take over moms spot but at least be another responsible adult who cares for those kids & their well being when they would visit their father!

I think you have every right to meet the woman. These are your kids too and you need to see she’s normal. Just as he has every right to meet your new boyfriend.

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I believe you have every right to meet this woman as he has every right to meet any man involved in your life who would be around the kids. If she is spending time with your children you should meet her. Be persistent about it!

I would also want to meet the women who is taking care of my kids.

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If it’s possible, try reaching out to her personally. Let her know you’re not looking for drama,issues etc, you just want to at least meet the person who is helping to care for your kids and may be picking them up from daycare.

Yes your wrong for not trusting her and yes you need to meet her and I’m sorry your judging dad for having another baby with another woman is wrong. I hope they only are good to each other but yes meet her and just be patient. He also is working hard for the kids but it is important they spend time at his place even if he works a lot it’s still their other home. If you can afford daycare sure put them in but if it really isn’t needed and it saves you money what’s the point. Good luck

I dont see a problem w you wanting to meet her. She should want to meet you as well. I bet if the shoe was on the other foot he would Demand to meet your new person.
Another baby?! Sounds like hes alittle streched for time w the ones he already has.
Im by no means badmouthing him. Im sure hes a good guy. It doesnt sound like jealousy to me. I think you are totally right in wanting to meet her. And if theres no problem then he shouldnt be opposed to it.
Unless youre one of those wackadoo exes that freak out!!! Lol, just kidding, a lil humor!!
As long as your kids come home healthy, happy, fed and seem fine w her thats what matters most. Maybe dad will grow up and think w his other head!! Sounds like the other gets quite a work out!

I would just leave him out of this decision and make it a point to meet her on your own. Call her or message her or go to the house when he isnt there. Have a conversation. You are their mother. You have every right to know who is in your child’s presence. Dont let some man tell you that another person is good just because he knocked them up.

As a coparent who is remarried and has visitation rather than custody, not only have I not left my kids alone with my husband prior to he and my ex meeting, I was pleased when my ex finally asked to meet my husband! I wanted them to at least shake hands once, considering my ex cares deeply about our kids, and my husband is now a part of their lives. The fact that your ex is making a huge stink about how you don’t need to meet his pregnant girlfriend would worry me. Is there something he is trying to hide? If she was a babysitter or something, you’d have to meet her, if not see her in person when you pick your kids up, and a babysitter isn’t a potential family member like this girlfriend is.

I don’t think it’s wrong to meet her either, maybe his work is very busy and is picking up extra hours. I mean I get that mine works 7 days a week. Everyone has bills to pay and he probably is paying child support. Everyone should.work as a team. I see alot.of moms think there just there kids but there not there both parents children. She is not a stranger to the children she is now part of there life and if she has been around a year and they like her even better. Never to.many people to make a good impression on a child’s life. Thats awesome.

Absolutely not! You are their mother. You should have been introduced to her before she was spending time with your kids. If he can’t see that, that’s his problem.

You absolutely are not wrong for wanting to meet her. She is caring for your children. On another note, you cannot control who is with the children on his days. Yes, I agree, leave them with you if he’s working but unfortunately the courts don’t operate that way.

No. As their mom, you should be able to meet her. Ive been in that situation as well. Because if that other woman happens to stay in their life, I wanna get along with her and do whats best for the kids and work togther

I made sure to meet my exs now wife…the one and only time he had my boys he admitted she was taking care of them while he worked, we communicated better than he and I did…

Bottom line… I believe real women want to meet the children’s other parent. It makes for a lot less of a headache in the long run. Sounds to me like he’s still trying to control you. And of course you should be concerned since he started out with supervised visitation. He obviously has a history of not making the best decisions. My ex didn’t introduce me to his wife until they got married. And she was around my son for 4 mos. but I don’t do drama. My kids happiness is my priority. I always pay attention to him and the way he speaks of them.

They are YOUR kids and YOU have the right to meet whoever is going to be looking after YOUR kids for so long and picking them up especially. U don’t know this woman u have no idea what she’s like and u can’t go on his word that the kids like her and so on u need to see for yourself simple as that. If he doesn’t let u meet her don’t put her down to pick up and let him take u to court. They will agree with u anyway. Good luck lovely

Hell no you aren’t wrong! You should absolutely be introduced to ANYONE that is spending time with YOUR children especially if they are physically carrying for them. You better watch who your kids are around. Get a lawyer.

I wouldn’t have let them go there unless u meet her first & approve of her…men only think with the wrong brain…seems like the woman would want to meet u too…follow your instincts…no matter what he thinks…good luck to you…:grin:

Some custody agreements will let you do a background check on any person that’s around your child/children on a daily basis. You have every right to make sure your kids are safe and taken care of.

I have better communication with my husbands’ baby mama than my husband and her do. I reached out to her myself and made it happen though. We talked through Facebook mostly until we built enough of a co parenting relationship to get each others phone numbers. It’s not illegal to go around him and contact her yourself. Just tread lightly so as not to make it uncomfortable or a bad experience. And who knows, maybe she wants a relationship with you too. I know I had a lot of questions about my husbands daughter at first that only she knew so we can all help raise her.

It is not unreasonable to want to meet her but I doubt the court will force that unless there is a safety issue. But you can stand your ground with pick up from daycare. If he can not utilize his time with the kids and pick them up when necessary then you can pick them up and can get them from you when he is available. If he wants her to be able to pick them up then meeting her, having her contact number, her address if it’s different from their father and that is where she takes the kids, would not be too much to ask. But realistically, once he has them unless you have first right to refusal, he will more than likely be able to choose the babysitter he wants.

Nope. I would be doing a background check. She has 10 month old who she does have custody and pregnant with a new guys kid. When women have custody when a child is born automatically her ex or whoever has custody proved she was not stable in court. 1. Why doesn’t she really have custody? 2. Even the courts will agree that you 2 need to be introduced. So what’s he hiding? So maybe it is lawyer time and background check time

Take him back to court. You can change it so he has to be present or they stay home.

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I would never let someone I don’t know pick up my children. If he was serious about this girlfriend why wouldn’t he want you to meet her? He needs to respect you as the children’s mother and you for him as the father. Unless the kids are being harmed then it’s a different story.

I would’ve wanted to meet her before my kids were left with her the first time… you’re the mom, you have a right to know who is caring for your children.

So do you not work when you have your kids? I get the frustration. But most people work 8-10 hours. He probably works like that to afford his life… still deserves to see his kids…
As far as the girlfriend goes I’d absolutely want to meet anyone spending that amount of time with my kids.

You wouldn’t send your kids to a friend’s house without meeting their parents. I think it would be wrong if you didn’t want to meet and know her.

You are absolutely right. You also need to go back to really having supervised visitation.

Been through the same thing years ago, he’ll use that against you in court…saying that you don’t want to even pick the kids up from daycare…do let him win…he’ll do the something to her in the end…Fight to the end, the kids will see who truly loves them, without involving them.
Exe’s truly Sucks !!

you should definitely meet her! you need to know who your kids are dealing with. he should have introduced her from the git go!

There is NO problem at all with you wanting to meet the woman that your ex is having watch your kids while he works. There is also nothing wrong with you not wanting to put her on the pick up list for daycare if you haven’t even met her.

they are your children and you have a right to know and talk to this person that is what co-parenting is. All are adults and if she is going to help him co-parent then you have a right.

It’s not unreasonable, I would need want to know who my children are spending time with. That being said if you don’t like her but don’t have a valid safety concern you will not be able to say no to the arrangement.

Your not wrong! U have every right to meet her! And if he makes it difficult then go 2 court and explain that u havnt met her so you don’t know who is looking after your children and u don’t feel they are safe as you don’t know her!

If he complains so …why not put kids first an be honest you either have the kids I’m not sending them to be babysat by somebody I don’t know. Reverse situation an he’d go nuts. Either be there or just take them for few hours. No court is gonna give the babysitter visitation rights. An no decent man would hide the babysitter from the other parent. Exspeciall is he lives with her!!! Right to know who has kids an no on permission to pick up kids. Know her first for a year. Kids safety first.

You have the right. Also to build a good relationship with her, it will only benefit your kids. You don’t have to be bff’s. But, keep it to the kids, do not make comments I about your ex or about their relationship. I did it with every person my ex had in our kids lives. You can reach out yourself, you don’t need his permission. Just be positive. Good luck.

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If he doesn’t want you to meet her, there is a reason why. I would insist on meeting her and then maybe after time of her earring your trust, maybe be put on the list. But until that happens, Absolutely not!!

I don’t think you are asking a lot AT ALL! It appears you have been quite lenient to me.

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Funny how he seems to pull all the shots clearly that is why he is an EX , If he knows he can spend time with his kids over scheduling work and chooses work he’s a Noddy , his new GF is making a pathway for him to do what he wants so she will find that out . You tell him you meet GF or NO she is NOT going on any pick up from day care list so that’s that.

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Nope, you’re not. Especially if they are having another baby. Sounds like she is going to be around a while, plus you ha e a right to meet anybody your children will be spending time around.

I met my x’s girlfriend now wife. We had coffee once and it eases anxieties on both our end. We were able to set boundaries on how we can Co-parent together and give our son the best possible life has to offer because we all love him and want whatever is best and working together is the only way to achieve that.

Yes, in my opinion, you should meet her,NOT put her on the pick up list, be VERY observant to your childrens behavior and attitude when they are returned to you.

I would absolutely want to meet someone that’s spending so much time with my kids. I see nothing wrong with that and neither should their father

I don’t think the request is obsessive or excessive. But you have to remember when you meet her, that she got into this kind of sideways: don’t take your frustration out on her.
Address friend of the court if you have to, after documenting how many times you address (and everything else) the non-time he spends with them during his parenting time, if he truly makes his own schedule.

No matter what: Keep your cool. People make mistakes when heated.

Yes I’d want to meet her. I’d also want to put in my parenting plan that if dad is working during parenting time that mom has first choice of having the kids instead of the girlfriend.

you have every right to know the person who is taking care of your kids when he’s not able to do these. if the court order says it’s his weekend; he needs to make himself available fot his kids. its doesn’t matter if he’s in a relationship with someone. I need to know who is around my kids when they are not with me. if their father dont have time for them, they need to be home with their mom. the world is too dangerous for you not to know this person he’s with.

Not wrong at all! How dare he. I can tell he is a freaking narcissist just by how you describe him. Stand your ground and tell him no. Is he takes you back to court show the judge how he isnt spending time with the kids

Meet her. Also do a background check.
I’m a mom of 3. And best believe I did a background check on my ex husband new gf. It has been 3 years and I have yet to meet her. But he lives put of state and get 2 weeks of custody a year. My bf has 2 kids. And I made sure to introduce myself to both moms. Even though #1 completely abandoned her daughter. #2 only wanted to cause drama for the 1st year, we think she wanted him back.

You’re completely entitled in my opinion to meet her. And honestly, if you have to sign off on her picking them up, he doesn’t have a choice if he wants her to :blush: Boo Hoo for him.

You should know the person your kids are with that’s your right as a mom he is being a jerk if you went to court about it the judge would make him let you meet her so tell him he can do it on his own or go to court.

Much love u got this! Doesn’t have a leg to stand on those r your babies and the fact that he’s stating they have a better relationship w someone he’s only known for a year then himself… red flag. I wouldn’t leave them with her or him.

Under Australian family law you have the right to know whom your child is with.

I suggest heading to mediation to get formal parenting arrangements in place and file with courts as custody orders.

If your kids are involved ABSOLUTELY NOT!!! You have every right to know who is in their lives!!!

No your not wrong for wanting to meet her. What would a judge think about him having visitation but not being there for the visit. If he wants a better relationship act like a dad

Of course not, he should have had the decency to introduce you to her.
Youse have kids together and you have every right to meet the person who he is with when your children are going to be around her

You should have met her already if your children are being left with her. If he’s being unreasonable take the issue to court.

You know what the court told both of us when we went to court? You have no say in who the other parent has around your child as long as they aren’t in danger. You don’t get to control that aspect of his life nor does he get to control yours.

Not wrong!! ABSOLUTELY RIGHT! YOU HAVE RVETY RIGHT TO MEET AND COMMUNICATE AS WELL AS PLACE BOUNDARIES

Theres no way in hell I would let my children stay with someone idk. You should have met her from the get go if shes watching your children while he works. Stand your ground and meet this woman

I had my attorney write in my papers if my ex was to leave he could not leave the kids with anyone else but myself or their Grandma. I did not know the crazy women he was with, I did not know what their back ground was. Heck yeah I would throw a fit and contact your attorney

Nope, don’t see a problem. It’s your right to meet anyone spending time with your children.

Yes you should meet the ex’s gf if she’s around your kids an extensive amount of time. My ex married a registered sex offender and I had to go to court in order to get sole custody because of it. You never know who a man is going to have around your kids as men think with their penises instead of their brains. Meet her and ease your mind.

Rite there with you ,meet that gf before it goes any further, you just can’t trust anyone with your kids,sad world we live in…

and your petty to bring up how many baby mamas he has that’s not even relevant in a conversation as long as he takes care of his children

I would not let her have permission to pick up the kids, period. You should absolutely meet her. He won’t get custody, especially if during his time he is leaving them with baby momma#3.

You have every right to meet the person you children will be with I wouldn’t be letting her pick them up if the father can’t pick them up They would back with me

You are right about everything. Stand your ground!

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We had a friend who whenever he had his kids, he left them on his girlfriend and did his own thing. It wasn’t her place to raise his kids, especially when he didnt want her kids over.

If you may not meet her, how can you thrust the time that your child is with her, it’s normal you want to know and its your right. And surtain when he is threatening with court…

Hell nah! I wanted to meet er one of my sons donors girlfriends. He had a different one every other month so I wanted to know who these strangers were

Don’t make it hard on the kids. They will figure out who loves them on their own. Arguments don’t help the kids

This is very complicated, and emotional on both sides. You need to consult a lawyer or have mediation done.

I think you’re spot on . You need to know what this lady is like otherwise no she can’t pick the kids up . And yes they should be with you when he is at work ,

I 100% agree with you. He’s being unfair. If he wants this to work he has to make the effort. You meeting his girlfriend the lady who’s going to spend al that time with your children is perfectly reasonable and I think it would be wrong for you not to. Stand up for what you think is right and don’t doubt your concerns

Ok while I agree you need to meet anyone watching your children… I go back to you saying it took a year before he could have them overnight…supervised visitation is NOT the norm just because of separation. Depending the reason for that…is his decision making in question concerning the children (new SO aside). And I’m re retracing he has this hf for 1-1/2 years yet a 10 moth old with someone else? I think there is a lot more going on and YOU have to be an advocate for your kids!!! Good Luck!

I have always met the women my kids will be around. As I would expect any women would want to meet me if I’m around her kids.

I wouldn’t like it but from what I understand if its how time with the kids he can make decisions about who he leaves them with unless you have full custody.

If she is going to be around your kids you have a right to meet her

Yes he has to work and just like mothers he has to find someone to take care of them while he is working. I totally agree you must meet her.

My kids dad is not allowed to have his gf around them until i meet her. If i dont meet her, he dont get them.

You do need to be allowed to meet her, prior to allowing her to pick up the children.

I would not let someone I don’t know pick up kids at all due to the fact so many children are a target for abduction or sex trafficking. Of you can’t meet her talk to a lawyer and see what they say. Don’t let him bully you into doing this

I agree with the man sometimes exes like the cause trouble with your current situation because they were bitter from the previous one and maybe he’s worried that’s what you will do

Thats one of my requirements. If my child is gonna be around someone alot I have the right to meet them.

Same problem here it’s a shame he can’t stand up and take care of his responsibilities and he has to have somebody else do it for him.

Why does it matter what he does with the kids as long as they come home happy and healthy

If you were hiring her as a babysitter, (which apparently he uses her as) you’d meet her first.
So why would he think you don’t need to? Pfft.

This girlfriend is a stranger to you! She should NOT have permission to be picking up your kids from daycare!!!

I wouldn’t agree to leaving them with anyone that you don’t know. It’s called sacrifice.

if my child were at day care no one i didn’t know or hadnt meet would definitely not be pickeing up my baby.

I would want to meet my exes friend. I don’t want just anyone around my grands are children. My grandmother’s rules.

I would definitely meet someone spending that much time with my children

If he does take you to court make sure to have proof of the fact that he isnt spending time with the kids

You have every rite to meet who your child is spending time with!!

Why doesn’t he want u to.meet her would be my question

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I don’t think he can dictate who is on the pick up list…it can be just you and him.