Can a 12 year old for sure know their sexual orientation?

Yes my daughter came out as gay when she was 10 she said she’s known since she was 8 she’s 12 now and still identify’s as 100% gay and has been dating a girl for awhile now. I knew I was bi when I was 7, just be supportive and understanding

“For sure”?? How about you love your child regardless. Some people can’t even have kids and your biggest concern is their sexuality?? Grow up. Support your child. This world is cruel enough,

I was 11 years old when I figured out my sexuality

My 15 year old sister said she was bi sexual at age 10. She’s been with a couple girls. And still likes girls. Totally possible.

Uh… I was full blown stalking the boy down the street by age 12. So yeah, you can definitely know what you’re into by 12.

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Yes!!! My daughter is only 9, and has only talked about having girlfriends and wives since she was 6. I have no doubt that she understands it and means it! So 12, 100%!

yes! but also - it’s okay for her to think she knows even if she doesn’t! just love her for who she is and encourage her on the path to be whoever she’s meant to be!

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I believe so. Why tho? I hope you’re not asking in hopes she will change her mind.

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Would u be questioning her if she said she liked boys :thinking:

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My sons transgender and he knew since he was 4 he was born in the wrong body… he’s almost 12 went from girl to boy…

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Definitely shouldn’t even be a conversation at 12. She can like whatever she chooses but I wouldnt encourage crushes on anyone, boy or girl at 12 years old.

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At that age, it’s confusing. They think A LOT of different things. I’d let her feel what she wants, don’t correct her. Then maybe in a couple years she’ll know for sure?

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I had a best friend in elementary school (2nd grade) kiss me. I dont know if she knew she like girls at the time or just felt it was an expression of love but all these year later she is happily married to a woman. I knew back then (8 years old) that kiss wasn’t right for me.

Bottom line is she could be confused, curious, gay, straight, bi sexual, or whatever. The main thing is she trust you enough to tell you how she feels. Do everything in your power to continue to keep and build that trust by keeping those lines of communication open. Love, support, and cherish your daughter. This world is cruel and no matter what her sexuality may be she needs you in her corner.

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Could you tell you liked boys at 12 years old? There is your answer.

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My daughter told me she liked girls at 8. She is now 20, and still feels this way. Just be supportive and understanding. They figure it out in their own time.

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I think you definitely know what you’re into at 12… it depends wether it’s just a phase or actually how the child feels, and that will come with time.

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Im not sure… my sister came out as transgender at 16(litterally like 4 months ago) And shes gone back and forth. Shes always bee girly…Shes said to mom that she doesnt know if she wants to be a boy. And other times shes talking about going on hormones and changes and changing her legal name.but since she is so young and has doubts we took all that off the table.

Honesty, we use (puberty) hormones as excuses for the way teens are, impulsive, rebellious but when it comes to sexuality its just not in the books?.doesnt make sense. I think it would take a couple years to really know for sure :woman_shrugging: just my opinion, i fully support all rights and i already have 1 lesbian sister, whats another one (LGBTQ)

Tell them how it should be, Naturally. She is a female and should NOT like girls! Not how the Lord God intended it. Tell her in God’s eyes it is a sin

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I said the same thing at that age. I experimented thought my teen years but I’ve been with the same man for almost 12 years know with 3 kids. Definitely a phase for me. My mom didn’t pay much mind to it other than say well what about kids. It was definitely a different time tho. I’m almost 30

Gay people usually know by the time they are 5

She may or may not. I don’t think her age will play into it. Some people as adults can’t figure it out. Just talk to her about the birds and the bees and keep her safe and comfortable. Ask how YOU can help her in any way she may need. Be her support :slightly_smiling_face:

She’s probably known for years

I would think so, maybe let her talk with someone but tell her if she is you will still love her no matter what .because I’m sure it was hard to say that to you.praying for you to have strength

Give your 12 year old some Barbie dolls and tell her to go play. Take the phone away, take the internet away and make her actually be a 12 year old. At 12 they shouldn’t even be worrying about who or what they are attracted to sexually. We become furious at pedophiles, yet we are telling our kids it is okay to decide who you are sexually attracted to at 12. SHE IS 12!!!

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Just be open. Just be there. At her age, it doesn’t really matter if she is gay or not. She should be comfortable being herself, in whatever form that is.

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Honestly how could they know unless they have had sex. I say let her feel like she thinks she like girls and see how it turns out. Really it’s so popular to be gay these days

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No
It’s been proven that by this age nothing is fully developed let alone their sexual orientation. I don’t understand the logic because they’re not old enough to buy a lighter they’re not mature enough to drink alcohol but they are mature enough to make a decision about their sexual orientation and sex?

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Yes. Also possible for her to not be sure and just be exploring. All kids are different. But it sounds like she’s sure.

i knew at age 7 i was gay so she can absolutely know! she knows what she’s attracted to and nobody can tell her different!

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Does it matter? Just love her. It wouldn’t change anything anyway.

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I think some are confused about when they see the word sexual preference they automatically assume sex. It’s a preference in sex as in female or male. You can have a crush on someone that age and not think anything sexual. So yes it is possible. If a 12 year old knew she liked boys would we be having the same question?

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I think yes in some cases, in other cases it can be very confusing for them. Just tell her you love and accept her no matter what her sexual orientation, and if she changes her mind as she gets older and realises she is bi or actually straight etc, then follow her lead. It’s all very confusing nowadays with the internet, and I think that most 12yo girls aren’t really having sexual thoughts (I wasn’t at that age so I don’t know how different it is for others) x

i think everyone can atest to having many identies through this crazy life. dont think too much into it, jsut support her every single day. if she wants to be a cat one day, let her. she is 12, so she is going through that scary part of life where independency and insecurity mix and create a slowly erupting volcano. you just have to be there every step of the way showing her that you love her and support her. who she loves, what she wears… alll that stuff doesnt matter, its your support that does.

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Just support her. Who’s cares if she’s old enough to know if she’s gay or not. Until she hits the legal age in her country to have consentual sex, she is really just exploring all sorts of possibilities. She may say she’s gay now, but she may change her mind,. Or she won’t. It doesn’t hurt you as a personand shouldn’t change your attitude as a mother.

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Why can’t a 12 yr old figure that out? Even before the internet kids that age knew that about themselves. Before cell phones too.
Help ur child, educate urself and support that child. In this day n age it’s all u can do

I have a friend who knew when she was five or so. Came out as bisexual in highschool. Later came out as homosexual. Sometimes when a person knows, they know. People might be apprehensive to make a definitive decision for fear of judgement, repercussions and lack of self assurance.

It’s possible for sure that she was seduced and brainwashed to feel and believe so. But don’t let that tear you two apart. Don’t treat her any differently and don’t try to change her mind, just continue to love her and support her. She may be sure of it today but she might change her mind in the future. She might fall on love with a man and form a beautiful family, and she might not. Pray.

I don’t have a 12y nor am i gay. But maybe explain to her that it doesn’t matter if you like girls or boys or both. Once she has dated a few she will know for sure which she prefers. But to never feel like she needs to come out and explain her choice to you. And to know her family love her regardless.

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It can change over time, some people come out as gay only to later end up in heterosexual relationships

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Just tell her she can be attracted to whoever she wants to be attracted to and that she doesn’t need to label herself as anything yet. She may like guys and girls, she may just like girls, she may change her mind as she gets older. I just wouldn’t make a big deal out of it. I had 2 ‘gay’ friends in my teens who both now have male partners and children. It’s a confusing age. Just support her :heart:

No! The media tells them it’s ok. I think they are just trying to belong. Fit in. Isn’t that what you wanted at 12?

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I I agree with most of you we as society should not judge ones love for another person. My and her fiance are getting married next fall sometime and I couldn’t be the most happiest mom. I will be gaining a daughter and I couldn’t be happier then I am right now for the both of them.

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She’s still a child. She’ll go through lots of phases before she figures stuff out. Tell her not to worry about relationships yet at all. She needs to focus on herself first.

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Teach them love, who they choose is up to them. Teach them the value of a dollar. What they spend it on is up to them. Teach them respect and they will respect other ppl choices.

What you teach is what they learn. Let them make the choice on their own.

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My daughter told me at 10 she thought she might be gay… She said she thinks girls are “pretty”, She is now 14 and still feels the same.

Honestly it shouldn’t matter if it is a “phase” or “the cool thing”, it is your daughter and her being happy and supported is the most important thing.

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I feel like kids wouldn’t even be thinking about being gay at such a younge age if it wasn’t all over the media lately.

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I believe it’s to young. Could just be curious I was curious at 12 didn’t like boys but girls were cute to me. A few years later I was all about boys 100% but still played with girls from time to time. At 34 I’m total boys and 4 kids.

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Honestly just support her, she may change her mind later and be like im bisexual. Who knows :woman_shrugging:. However they do grow and things change don’t worry but it, its all good.

I think at a young age you know what you are attracted to yes. Think back to when you started saying so and so is cute… I was in kindergarten. So if you think Annie is cute over Johnny I believe you have an idea.

I guess so. My niece was young when she told her mom she liked girls

Yes I knew my neice was from 5 years old and so did her parents . Just sit back and let her make her own decision

Absolutely not too young.

Maybe she will end up bi. Never know.

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Did you know at 12 if you liked boys?
Why can’t she know at 12 if she likes girls?

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For sure! They need your support.

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I’ve been threw this 3 times… from my personal experience I didnt freak out was just like ok… other people who are gay said it took them a little longer to find out… so i didn’t stress it wouldn’t matter to me anyways but apparently the new thing in kids is gay… everyone’s gay :joy: its “cool” for mine anyways they it was just a phase… but who knows just love them either way! I think they are too young anyways to know for sure but then again I’m not gay so maybe they do know!

Teach them the Bible and what God likes and doesn’t like.

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I believe its possible

Absolutely :heart: my bestfriend said she liked girls when we were in kindergarten. She is now 32 and happily married to her wife :heart:

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For sure! Support and love!!

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If a person can know they’re straight at 12 they can also know they’re gay. Likewise a woman can be straight, marry a man, live the happy life happy wife life, then after a divorce discover she prefers women. Sexuality can be fluid. But whatever you do DO NOT DISCOURAGE OR DEMEAN HER. Do not invalidate what she is feeling now. Do not tell her, “Oh you’ll change your mind,” or, “this is just a phase,” because if she was willing to tell you than to her right now it’s not a phase, it’s her life.

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I think they could but also maybe someone is saying they are gay or just thinking so. My grandson told us he was from age 13-21 told him if so it’s ok but dont act on it make sure he is now 25 and has a great relationship with a really sweet girl. Sometimes they just aren’t sure

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My aunt was like 8-13. She’s still gay, and happily married. So yes.

There are questions that needed to be asked like, how did you know you’re gay or lesbian or anything they orient themselves to. Pre-teens are the foundation of adulthood, and if it’s not confirmed correctly, then confusions begin as to “why” am I like this or the most common question is, “am I normal?”

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I knew I was bisexual when I was 6.

You should always accept her, no matter her sexual orientation, so if that is what she wants, then you should go with it. I am personally straight, and I know that if it were any different, my mom would probably have a problem with it, and it’s sad to say that. You need to support and love her as much as you can because some other kids don’t get that support they need. :heart:

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If she told you she had a crush on a boy would you be questioning her sexuality then too?? No you wouldn’t you’d just go with it.
So just go with it now, she’s comfortable enough to tell you. Just be there for her and let her know you appreciate her honesty and don’t question it

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Absolutely and I think that’s GREAT they felt comfortable enough to come right out and tell you.

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Yes, she can know at that age. Most kids know a lot younger but don’t know the word for it or where told it’s wrong and hide it till they are older.

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Yes, they are born that way. Be proud that she feels comfortable enough to discuss this with you.

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I knew fairly young. I was about 5 or 6 when i figured it out. Other kids i know have figured it out while young. For some it is a phase. But let them figure it out for themselves, be supportive.

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I came out as bisexual to my mother at 11, i had no idea what it meant. But sadly, times have changed.

Yes I was going to say and the fact that she is comfortable enough to tell you don’t lose that! Just be there every step for her :heart::heart:

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My daughter came out at at 11. They know. When you were 12 didn’t you have crushes on boys? I did. So if she has a crush on a girl, why should it be so strange

Absolutely!!! Our daughter came out at 12 and we love her just the same as before we knew!! Just support her❤️

Shes known alot longer. Its who she is. Just love her like you always have!

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Either way, support, accept and love her for who she is.

I can’t believe how people have made this so normal … In as much as you all saying accept her etc that shit is not right that’s insanity!!! God did not create eve & eve or Adam & Adam troll me if you like but I will always stand against homosexuality it’s a disease instead of giving proper advise to get her straight you are saying encourage her to be with girls OMG she was not born that way it’s the devil !!

Does she know that gay means happy… when I was growing up that is what it meant … and a rainbow was a promise from God …u dont need peoples opinion for ur own child … if you are a believer then read and judge for yourself … know that u will answer no one else

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Right just go with it

Yes. Does it matter if shes straight or gay? Would you question het if she said she had a crush on a boy? A lot of people know before that. How old were you when you had your first crush?

Well I’m pretty sure your born that way so…

Whether she does or doesn’t. Supporting your child no matter they are feeling is what’s most important so they dont feel scared or alone at such a vulnerable age. Being gay is no big deal. Just like being heterosexual… children as they grow figure it out with support and love

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My son told me at 12 he is Gay hes 16 now nothing has changed thankfully hes perfect as he is :smiling_face::smiling_face::smiling_face:

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Yes. They can. Be supportive.

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Yes. I knew I was attracted to females very early on. The most important thing u can do is just make sure she knows u love her no matter what. That it doesn’t matter who she loves.

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That may change it may not love her anyways. It dnt matter

Yes. I knew I liked boys when I was 12. What’s the difference?

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Yes. I had a 12 year old student come out to me. I was honored to be trusted enough to be told. I will say my heart hurt a little with fear of what he would potentially face as he got older, but society was beginning to change at that time and he was lucky to be surrounded by super supportive people and he’s now a fantastic adult, confident in himself and a blessing to those around him.

Take a deep breath, be supportive and educate yourself so you are more comfortable being supportive.

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Idt a 12 year old knows anything for sure. All you can do is support her and let her figure it out on her own.

I guess I’m wondering why it matters? If she’s attracted to girls right now, but then maybe boys too at some later point, great. You just support. But I’d say most people know who they are primarily attracted to, well before 12.

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I’m so glad to see the majority of comments be loving and supportive!! :purple_heart:

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Yes. At a early age didnt you know you liked boys ???

I knew way before I was 12, be supportive, that’s a brave girl you have! Takes a lot of courage to come out :two_hearts:

I knew mine before I hit puberty. Pretty sure I was still in elementary school.

Yes she is old enough to know. You must have a good rapport with her-GOOD JOB MOM! Most kids are afraid to tell…

It’s possible, it’s also possible that she will change her mind :wink: just be supportive and let her know you love her no matter what. Some people dont know until they are adults.

Yes of course … I mean I knew I liked boys at that age , actually well before that age lol

My sister has known since she was a little kid so I’d say she could know

Yes, I came out as bisexual at age 11, I knew that I liked boys and girls