Slap her in the mouth … tell her
“Kissing someone who smokes is like licking an ash tray.”
Yes, I think you’re in the wrong to kick out your CHILD for smoking! Do you think being on the streets homeless will help her NOT smoke or do drugs?!
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Nope. Dont let her. But dont kick her out… depending on what state you live in it is illegal to kick a minor out(I lived in Pa. When my 20 year old went through this and more) Take everything away, keep her away from friends, cut all outside world off except school. Also you can get in trouble for allowing a minor to smoke. I almost got a dang ticket because my 17 year old son was smoking on my front porch the officer knew he was underage and I was at work! My son got me on the phone and the officer had the nerve to tell me he was going to charge me for supplying him with cigs… I won in court because the judge knew I was the mom who would find my son doing stuff at other people’s houses and would call the police and have him physically removed and brought back home. The judge told him I only had to provide a room, no door, a bed, blankets, food and two sets of clothes as long as I had a washer. That day in court, in 2017 I took him home, took his bedroom door, phone, and all clothes but 2 sets, TV, xbox, everything… he was grounded and had to earn everything back. It took a good month for him to get on board, he had everything back by 6 months…but 13 to 17 were very hard years. We have a amazing relationship, he graduated on time, and has a good job and lives on his own. I fully believe in being a parent first, a friend second. Even now as a parent to a 20 year old. I was a single mother at the time, worked fulltime; it was rough, but he was worth every screaming, wrestling match to fight for his health!
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I started smoking at 16 and my parents were disappointed but didn’t even threaten to kick me out. You are a PARENT. She is a CHILD. I understand you are at your wits end but you wanted a child and brought one into this world. You can just throw her away and ask for a new one. Get counseling for the both of you. There are many different ways to approach this without dumping your CHILD! Plus if you kick her out, you go to JAIL. She is legally yours until 18!
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I’m she 14 she don’t have to go anywhere. U don’t have to let her hang out with friends. What ever happened to a good ass whoopin? I can promise u that’s what would happen to me. And I wouldn’t have been allowed to leave the house. Touch that door knob my ass would have been handed to me
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In my experience kicking kids out makes the problem worse, not better. Your adding a feeling of unworthiness and being unloved and that’s a risky path to take.
She’s young. Tell her she’s not seeing those friends. Drop/pick her up from school. Remove her internet access.
You could buy strong smokes and make her smoke. If she makes herself sick on it then there’s a pretty good chance she won’t go back. I’ve been smoking since 13 and I really wish I was stopped back then.
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I cannot believe people are commending this and are in agreement!!! She is a CHILD! Its cigarettes not freaking crack! Is it okay to be disrespectful? No. Is it okay to smoke when you’re not of legal age? No. But it’s even WORSE to kick your CHILD out of the house.
Pull up your big girl panties and be a damn parent for crying out loud!! If she is also doing drugs, get her help! I promise, kicking her out will only make matters worse. She will likely turn to drugs, and not something like marijuana either. And she definitely wont quick smoking.
Just threatening her will have long term effects on her mental health.
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Actually I started smoking at 14 but my parents never knew until I was 18. I have a daughter that thought she knew it all at 14 and when I went to pick her up at work, she came out to the car and told me she would be by later to pick up her stuff, that she was moving in with a friend. I told her until she was 18 I was responsible for her, so unless she wanted me to cause a scene right there in the parking lot she would go get her things and get her ass in the car. I told her on the ride home, that when she was 18 and wanted to move out, I’d help her pack her shit. My girls were allowed to smoke when they were teenagers but knew not to ask me to buy their cigarettes. They were allowed to drink ( usually wine coolers) while they were home. I always saw it as having teenage daughters, I’d rather have them smoking & drinking at home, then out somewhere where I didn’t know if they were safe. My girls started dying their hair at 12, its only hair. There are worse things then smoking & drinking Mom…you have to pick your battles. If you would like to know the rest of this story just ask me.
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I too have a 14 year old that told me she experimented with smoking. I didn’t freak out. I instead asked her how it made her feel, why she did it, and explained calmly why i don’t condone it but feel good knowing she trusts me enough to even tell me the truth. Am I going to kick her out for smoking? Absolutely not. Am I going to establish expectations and let her know the consequences for not following rules? Absolutely. We actually have a great relationship. I talk to her all the time and I love hard on her. You may just need to supervise her a little extra so that she doesn’t spend too much time with those friends outside of school. Be patient. Parenting is hard but don’t kick her out on the streets for making bad decisions. We all make bad decisions at times
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She’s 14 not 18 you cannot just kick her out I smoked all through high school turned out just fine and am going to college. You need to reevaluate yourself if you’re willing to put your CHILD on the street. Talk to her about safety precautions and being careful who she smokes with and gets stuff from. Talk to her about people drugging in order to rape and kidnap. Take her to therapy maybe she’s going through something in her mind. But whatever happens if you push her out you are only making things worse and that’s child neglect and abuse to kick her out she’s 14 she’s still a child not an adult. Maybe you need therapy too 
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14??? Oh hell no…she would be locked in her room and I would have a long wooden spatula with holes waiting if she stepped out of line. I would put her butt on home school and she would never leave the house if she disrespected me time and time again. If she isn’t listening and going down a bad path, straightened her out. Maybe she needs talking or a time out or maybe she needs to tell you something. . Let her know who is the boss. My kids have a healthy fear of me. I don’t have to act, it they just know I will. I have never beaten my kids but I have have a handle on them since they were born.
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Honestly… I started smoking at 12! Now— I’m a perfectly capable and healthy adult. I do not smoke. I do not do drugs. I am not an addict. I am a college graduate, business owner and mother of 4. Sometimes kids loose themselves temporarily. Understand that she is going through something and kicking her out will not solve it. It just won’t. There are rehabilitation and behavioral camps you should consider. Kids never act out for no reason. Give her the opportunity to express her pain instead of punishing her for not knowing how to manage it.
Here is an example of a behavioral camp near me maybe you can find something similar near you.
https://www.ironwoodmaine.com/ironwood-residential-treatment-center.html
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I was 16 and tried the same thing. My mother bought a pack and told me I had to smoke the entire pack in front of her in one night. By about the 8th one, I was nauseous and never wanted to see another one EVER! Beat her at her own game.
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You dont let her out. Shes to do school and nothing else. Take her phone, take everything from her room except a bed and clothes. Be a parent. If she sneaks out, let the police pick her up and let them keep her. Why give her any other choice? I was raised in a very strict house, and I grew up just fine. Parents need to stop being friends and being afraid to discipline.
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My dad told me if i do anything to tell him and be honest and just told me to know the people im around. Just tell her to be careful and use her head. Its the only way to keep her safe and keep the trust.
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Don’t ever tell her that. You just closed a door of communication. Kids try it. Kids listen to her friends. Do the other parents allow their kids to smoke? Maybe a sit down with her friends parents. Restrictions on friends. Limits on freedom. Just dont tell her you are kicking her out or sending her some where. That is absolutely the worst thing to do. I was the kid that had those parents. Guess what… I left and never came back. Ive struggled my whole adult life but it was better living with parents who were willing to throw me out instead of actually be there for me. I still have a very rough relationship with my parents to this day. I know they regret their choices with me but you only have one life.
Personally you are not going to get her to stop smoking and the more you try to get her to stop the more she will rebel and do it.
But like many people have said restrict her fun time, find out (if you don’t know how to do it) how to change the wifi password if you have broadband make her earn it.
If she has prepaid dont buy her more credit again make her earn it. If she wants new clothes make her earn it, new shoes make her earn it.
When she complains because let’s face it she will let her know that if she wishes to be grown up and smoke and behave like an adult then she needs to work for the stuff she wants. As adults we get nothing for free we all have to earn it, work for it.
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Shes crying out for attention. It’s weird. For example…I was raped at 15 and all of a sudden became very promiscuous without understanding why. Anyway my mother instead of finding the root of the problem just called me a Slut for years. Long story short,do not be judgemental and find out what’s REALLY going on. Do not throw her away.
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- Make sure she has no money.
- Disable phone and internet.
- Take away tv privileges. You can do this by putting a lock through the hole in the tv plug.
- Take away nice clothing and make her do her own laundry.
Legally toy just provide food, shelter, clothing and medical care. All else is a privilege that should be earned. Don’t give in but also don’t argue. You won’t win an argument. Ignore all attempts to get you into an argument, even if you have tp go to your bedroom, lock the door, crank up the music. If you give up the battle, you are likely to lose the war
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Make her smoke a whole pack until she’s green ! Fags cost money, stop giving her cash
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When I was 14 I started smoking too. My both parents are non smokers and my mom was devastated when she found my cigarettes. She told me it’s the worst thing I can do for my health, but I just didn’t care. I was a teenager, I thought I was the smartest person in the World. But you know what: I never did that smoking to spite my mother. She had nothing to do with it. I was just growing up and testing things. That’s what’s your daughter is doing. She is not a child anymore, neither a grown up. Let her go through that. Just LET HER! She needs to have her own path through this transition and you’re not helping by threats. Let her know that you clearly don’t support that and tell her WHY. Also tell her that she can’t smoke in the house because you disaprove of that and that’s all you should do.
She’ll come up with her senses when teenage transition goes away.
My daughter did this at 15 I put her out of my house since she had all the answers to all the questions and low and behold 2 months later she was knocking at the door because she wasn’t ready for the beating society was taking her through sometimes you’ve got to Sherri m show kids whose the boss by making them think their in charge
Make her eat one.
When I was this age 
🤦 what my foster carers did to me. It worked two.
We was all this age once I’d be more prouder of the fact she been open and honest with you and isn’t hiding it.
By drugs you mean weed right ?!. ---- not gateway drug . Loads people smoke it just not 14 year olds ban her from having option to smoke.
My foster dad drives down n up the rd everyday 🤦🤦🤦 people even called the police for suspicious man following a young girl.
Then got bullockomg from police about it two now here twenty years on I smoke like a train. Lol. Where as if they not punished me o think I’d grown out of it.
When I was little, I got caught smoking by my mom.
She made me sit in a chair, put a bucket over my head, handed me a pack of cigarettes and told me to smoke them.
I couldn’t even smoke half of 1 lol it was impossible to breathe.
She told me, if I kept smoking that, how I felt trying to smoke that 1 cig would be how I would eventually end up breathing in general.
Tough love works you are the mother she’s the child , cigarettes are expensive and it’s a serious bad habit and causes health problems ,put your foot down and stay on it or it will get worse I know I been through it when my daughter was younger shes 24 now. it’s mostly peer pressure she probably wants to fit n with her friends that’s why she does it , she’s a teenager not an adult she should want good health and not health problems that come with smoking
My parents told me the same thing and I left then they made me come back home which only lead to me being more secretive disrespectful and hating them more at 17 my boyfriend asked me to marry him I said yes and my mom kicked me out again I left and never looked backed they moved to Arizona I left that boyfriend and was on drugs and dropped off the face of the planet to them a year later I was pregnant and desperate kicked out of my boyfriends place and alone. There was no way anyone was getting to me but my parents only made things worse by kicking me out because I truly thought they did not care for me at all and only loved my brother and sister. Now I have a 13 year old son who is a handful of attitude and has a rebellious side but I tell him I love him I understand and that I will be here for him but he will not speak to me disrespectful or treat his siblings like shit. I am honest and open with him an accept that he can be mad but that doesn’t mean he can be mean and hateful. He is disciplined he has chores he goes to therapy. It’s hard but now I understand my mother’s perspective but I can understand my kids too. It’s hard but don’t kick her out it will only make things worse for her.
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Noo don’t be harsh on her, sit her down, put out all the consequences of smoking eg cost of cigarettes, harmful effects like poor circulation, lung infections and inflammation, gastric problems and the big risk of cancer, she may not listen to you now but will think about it, sometimes it’s just a phase and peer pressure but do not loose your patience, be calm and handle the matter, also allow her to air her views, let her know you are doing that because she is your child and you love her and only wants what’s best for her, all the luck:pray:
Throwing your own child out at 14 bc you’ve ran in to some parenting issues is wrong. You are the parent and it’s your place to help your child in times of troubles not ditch them. She needs you obviously and you need to do all you can to be there and try to understand her and help her
How can u do that to ur daughter she is only 14 she is following steps of her friends…there are other ways to do things…what would happen if something happened to her. Would u feel guilty…and yes its wrong to disrespect u…but u can ground her…if she has a cell phone take that…call the kids parents…and u can also not talk to her…one thing i did was i made sure there was food in the house and if they wanted to eat they had to fix it for themselves. And once they decided to respect me then we would talk…then i sat up consequence if they did it again what do they think i should do and i had them write them down…and then i told them it would be my choice which one it would be. And depended on what it was and how important it was and i made my time that way. And had them sign it…so if it happened i showed them what they signed…and it helped…but never ever kick u kids out cuz if anything happened u would never ever forgive ur self…they have programs out there to help…but peer pressure is hard especially with kids…and im sure u could get into trouble cuz i think that is child neglect. And as a parent we all say the wrong thing when we are made…especially when it comes to respect…just stop doing things for her. And ur not a bad mom just a frustrated one…u can also show her pictures of what happens to people who do drugs they have so many that have died from drugs itd fentanyl go into the group of loss and grieve and how is she getting the cigarettes does she get allowances if so stop giving it to her she can find her own way of getting them…if she is stealing then call the calls it called theft again its not easy being a parent it suckd but we need to show kids unconditionally love…hope this gives u some ideas and these are things i did and it helped…good luck
Please if you need more specific advice pm me. I had a really hard time with my daughter. But the short answer is let her go if she wants to. Text everyday that she is loved. Pray every night. She will come back. Mine was older, like 17, when I asked her to leave and the final straw was after finding an elephant shaped bong and smashing it, she told me that I owed her $20 because that’s what she paid for it. Don’t listen to these women that don’t understand the frustration and pain and complete hell that it causes in your family. They don’t know. My daughter is almost 26 and I couldn’t be more proud of her. She smokes pot daily but still maintains a very productive life
So because you don’t know how to deal with a difficulty, you’re going to throw your child out?? What?? Really?? She’s 14! You don’t chuck her out cos she smokes! You ground her, you take away her privileges, you don’t let her hang out with the people who encourage this. You don’t throw an innocent child out to live on the streets! How is that parenting? Some kids are going to make bad choices at some point or another and it’s what you do about it that will set the tone. You deal with it. You don’t abandon her! You make your home her safe place, and you give her consequences for her behaviour. And you reward positive behaviour. You don’t need to be a Mensa member to work that out. I’m sorry, I’m just so shocked that your teen has tried something that many teens try, and made a mistake, and your first thought is to kick her out to live on the streets! With parents like you, who needs enemies?! 
What you going to do when she first comes home drunk? And starts having sex? Chuck her out?
I was a 14 year old who was kicked out on a regular basis for smoking, or coming home a minute late etc. I’m 46 and I’ve had mental illnesses caused by that kind of parenting. I even ended up foster care when my mum and dad didn’t want me - my mum left when I was 11 and I wasn’t wanted. My dad hated me because I reminded him of my mum. They screwed my life and brain up and they wondered why at 14 I also tried to commit suicide. I had no help. I was moving in and out of places.
The ONLY thing it’s taught me is what NOT to do to your kids, so I am very very close with all 3 of my children. They know no matter how badly they screw up, even if I’m super angry, that I’ve got their back, love them, and they will always be safe with me. They’re the only things I’ve done right in my life, my life was buggered by my parents and what they did and what they didn’t do.
Yeah If you want her to screw her life and mind up for the rest of her life, throw her to the streets for smoking…
I always told my kids tell me everything…i might not like it…but we will work through it…together…
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That’s wrong of you because she could personally could be going through something you say she won’t accept help from anyone well how is she supposed to get help if her own mom can’t help her instead of bashing her about it ask her why she does it. She might not even know why. You don’t have to support the fact but you should SUPPORT HER. No matter what decisions she makes. That’s how teens end up pregnant on the run and druggies because they have no one to confide in.
Who’s the adult and who’s the child. If you keep doing nothing nothing is what you will get out of her
If you show her you are the parent and she’s the child regardless she will see that she can’t get away with the things you have been letting her get away with. You have to parent all the time not just when things are good but also when times are tough
Be one way with her. You can’t be her friend you have to be her parent or she will never respect you as such. It’s hard to see her like this I’m sure but imagine how hard it will be to see her locked up behind bars. Take the lead
Also take away the things that she enjoys give her chores to do trust me it’s not gonna kill her it might kill her pride but she will survive TRUST ME
She will thank you for it when she’s a mother herself
Take away her phone, money, makeup, a 14 yr old doesn’t need these things if she won’t mind her parents. She is a child. Not a legal adult. 18 is when its legal to tell them to pack their bags. Not 14. Take her to a cancer center find someone suffering from lung cancer who smoked willing to share their horrible struggle. At 14 she isn’t mature enough to make this choice of addiction and possible cancer decision.
That’s what happened with me when I was 13 and it turned into years of battling with drug addiction, depression and anxiety. I hope that you can encourage her and look into resources to help her. Putting her out on her own will do nothing but hurt her more and inturn she’s going to probably use more and do more reckless things. I have 6 years clean and it took me a long time to finally pull my head out of my ass. Hope she figures that out sooner then later, she’s so young.
I would not kick her out. She may end up in the sex trade. Not by choice. Then you may regret it. Where the Father? He needs to step up to the plate .
If hes not in her life , thatbbn is the biggest problem. She need her Father, good or bad.
Good luck.
Lol imagine calling yourself a mother and abandoning your child because they made a mistake or chose a wonky path in life. You will lose any respect she has for you if you abandon her.
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Hello and my daughter, who is now 36 and has been in recovery for 2 1/2 years, started smoking, drinking, drugging and became sexually active at 14. She is still struggling with her addiction to nicotine. She has a 14 year old daughter and a 9 year old son who have both chosen to never even try smoking, never even try a drug, absolutely no alcohol drinking and my granddaughter has decided on her own to not engage in sexual behavior until she is married. As a mother who had to watch her own daughter’s self destructive behavior, I asked my grandchildren to choose themselves and their future over wasting their precious health, money, and future on things that will never serve them in any positive way. It seems to me that in today’s society, smoking, drugging, drinking, and sexualized behavior is thought of as “just something all teenagers do.” Once a teenager has stepped over that line, they do not benefit from an angry and reactive parent, but instead, they need to understand why they are choosing to be self-destructive. I hope your relationship with her is strong enough to talk about the why and then talk about the why she shouldn’t do this to herself. Addictions steal who you are until you become someone you are not. She needs you to help her see that she can take a different road that will lead her to her best self or continue down the road on which she will lose herself. I hope you can reach your daughter where I could not reach mine.
I moved my daughter out of state. But not everyone has that option. Ground her & take her most important things. Phone, computer ect…
To add. I wouldn’t kick her out but I would call the cops on her and her friends while they’re doing drugs. My mom would have showed up, grabbed me by the hair and whooped my sorry ass in front of my friends then waited for the cops. Fortunately she didn’t ever have to do that because I knew she would have and just knowing that kept me straight. I personally think your kids should fear you a little, at least if they won’t respect you, they’ll know you are not the person to mess with. My kids have seen how I handle idiots in everyday life, they know I am NOT the mom to put up with this type of shit.
Honestly if you get cought kicking her out and child services get involved they can get you for child abandonment, I know because this has happened to a friend of mine!!! Your her mother and she’s to obey your rules as long as she’s a minor living in your home and your taking care of her!! The child really needs you to buckle down and make her listen to your her mom. Take devices, internet, shoot I had a boyfriend in high school who lost everything in his bedroom including his dresser full of clothes except for a mattress on the floor a sheet a pillow and a little plastic bin to put his clothes in it’s all because he was making these and apps at school and not doing his work right and getting kicked out of the band. you are her mother it is up to you to enforce the rules I was not a teenager who was lured into peer pressure on drugs or alcohol I did smoke cigarettes though I’m not going to lie but some children start with cigarettes and then they go to the alcohol and drugs usually because of the peer pressure I on the other hand was just different at that age I didn’t really care what other kids thought I wasn’t scared of them I said no and that was the end of it if I had to find my way home I would and that was the end of that and I was not scared to tell my mom I’m home because my friends were doing drugs and I didn’t want to be there.that showed my parents that I was a little bit more responsible on that part then they would be thinking. My mom and dad wouldn’t let me go off with my friends if that was the case I would be pretty much our home. But honestly I wouldn’t give her any money to go buy two cigarettes but there are other people willing to give her cigarettes or buy her cigarettes either way.I like cousin was real bad on drugs and I was a kid and my aunt had sent her to her dad’s house and at the time her dad was a cop apparently and he ended up taking away anything and everything for my cousin especially anything to make drugs out of even fingernail polish fingernail polish remover at all of that she put bars on her windows and he would lock her in her room when she could not get out now of course I mean my cousin is able to eat breakfast lunch and dinner go to school and all of that mess but she was watched very closely I remember that then it got to where he had to homeschooler because he couldn’t just watch her all the time at school. You just have to try to enforce it the best you can that’s the only advice I know what to say. I know raising teenagers is hard my girlfriend has two teenagers and a little kid in the house and the one teenager they already caught vaping and something happened with the cell phones and she was eavesdropping on the kids and she didn’t like the conversation so she smashed her daughter’s phone like all over the house and then they were grounded forever after that they had no internet they have no devices I have no idea if they were planning on sneaking out of the house or what they were doing because she never told me.I figured she told me when she was ready but you just have to lay down the law you’re the parent and that’s the end of it till there 18.
She is 14… still a baby… ground her ass she can’t go out and smoke then. You can’t throw her out for being a teenager, going through puberty and finding her feet. Explain your concerns, tell her consequences and teach her the correct way… don’t damage her for peer pressure issues. Your her mum she isn’t meant to be your friend she is looking to find her feet… rules and boundaries, actions and consequences she needs to learn not be put in danger by being thrown away by her mum
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Being an Pacific Islander, i would beat her ass first! And then Remove all privileges and start charging rent 
and food that she eats under my roof. Basically telling her, my house my rules. Wanna be a grown up adult? Well…
My daughter was worse running away hitting me with fist pills pot she was bad i locked her up for 38 days in a treatment center she came out pregant but it changed her now she talks to me she dnt yell she is good now occasionally a out burst or so but i couldnt ask for anything better from her she is on the right path now u got to do tough love no friends no phone no internet no leavin till u can build trust not just with her but she needs to trust u its a long road but dnt wait as long as i did cuz it makes it harder
Do not kick her out, find a good church start reading Gods Word, have even 30 min per day, bible reading & prayer time.!Get rid of tv & things that stop from family bonding, maybe take a trip to ocean. Get away. Remember she only does what you allow. Kids don’t need stuff, they need respect for parents.
She is only 14. Be tolerant of this bad habit and when she turns 18 she can leave. Until then you are her parent.
I would change her school, spend as much alone time with her, instead of getting mad try to understand why she felt the need to fold to their peer pressure, try to build her confidence, my opinion…
My aunt wouldve beat me:joy:
but seriously change her classes or switch schools. Talk to the school staff and tell them she is no longer allowed around those kids and tell the school you need to reach out to their parents!!!
Take everything away nothing but the clothes in her room and id go as far as take her door away and shell have to change in the bathroom. Tell her she has one week to change her ways or everything is GONE
Well when I caught my granddaughter she was 14 yrs old with cigarettes, I”m sorry to say I made her chain smoke 1/2 pack an ate the other half. She is 23 now an thanks me every day for making her never wanna smoke again…
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I had my dad stop… I got a video of me soaking cigs In the toilet then drying them out and putting them back… I let em see the video one day and that was that… Of course I didn’t use the same cigs
She smokes big deal you were just looking for an easy out instead of parenting. Kick her out over smoking and being A TEENAGER!!! how stupid isdcc that.
Okay well I can tell you my story and I’m hoping this actually gets through her head this morning around 8:00 8:30 where I live I’m from Tioga county PA okay my husband and I was taking his friend home because they both work at the same job and when we was going through this small town called Westfield PA and we live in Knoxville PA not even 5 minutes for each other okay let’s just say we’re just mining our own business literally driving and then my husband spoke up and says why does it look like there is a guy dead I’m like what he’s like yeah there’s a guy back there look like he’s dead he’s just laying on the ground and I wasn’t even paying attention so I was looking at my phone for something so I yelled at him told him to hurry up and turn around so when we did we got to the guy come to find out this guy we knew pretty well and let’s just say he overdosed he was so blue in the face so cold I didn’t have my medical equipment so I couldn’t work on him and there was a guy there supposedly already called 911 I said well you need to do more than just call them because they’re going to take a while to come out and we need someone here because if not he’s going to die on us so my husband and I started calling anybody that we can think of to get down here to help we called the two local cops in town we called the fire department 911 again and my sister because her son watches my nephew was in a different fire department if no one did not show up like the police officer if he didn’t show up the time he did if we waited for about another five or ten minutes this person would have died like he was bad the way he was laying and everything he wasn’t laying flat he was all like curled up in the ball basically arm all bet and everything and this morning was very chilly it was cold and he must been there for a couple hours if not the whole night if you say that when we got there we asked the guys what was going on who is the guy like who did you call what is going on and they all just told me oh we don’t know who this guy is we think it’s this person we don’t know what’s going on well I’ve been down to see who it was and see if he was alive and when I bent down I knew who he was and I said you need someone now because if not he’s going to die he was literally blue and purple bad he was breathing heavily snoring kind of wise he wasn’t breathing if you know what I’m talking about. It was scary I was worried sick I still cannot get this image out of my head I literally can’t. And this person that I’m talking about is literally is hanging out with the wrong crowd is doing drugs he literally overdose maybe three four times already he’s been a rehab he’s been in jail and the problem is he wants the health but to me it looks like he just wants to be that cool kid if you know what I’m saying and this person I’m talking about is literally in his twenties he’s like 26 years old he’s not that very old and sorry to say this but having those kind of friends like she wants is not good it’s really isn’t trust me my husband he was like that too you started I think he said 12 if not 14 years old or smoking and then he start doing drugs and hang out with the wrong crowd people that are like that will eventually want the help because my husband got to help he wanted he actually joined the military and that’s what saved him it’s just depends on if she actually wants the help and you just got to keep telling her you know if you’re going to go the wrong path something’s going to happen to you I’ve had a niece that was in the drugs and still in the drugs and we almost lost her a few times and we just keep pounding her head you know you’re hanging with the wrong crowd you’re going to lose your kids you’re going to either end up like your mother passed away it’s just hard situation to go through but never give up never give up because when you give up then she’s going to know oh look my parents don’t care then I can do what I want and get a get away with it. What she really needs is the support and the love.
When you have birth and kept your child , you committed to raising her to the age of 18. She is a child not an animal to be given away. You put your child on the street for smoking you are making a worse mistake than she is. You do not need to support her habit but you need to support her. Neglect is never the right answer.
My god no it’s please! She’s still a child!! U being so harsh on her is only going to push her to worst things!! I have a son who is 13 , I know exactly who is friends are , he’s not allowed to go anywhere alone . We ll be taking him and he’s best friend for a meal . We are friends , he can share anything with me and from day 1 I have warned him against the dangers of mixing with wrong crowd and smoking etc! Become her Freind not an enemy . She’s going through a lot of hormonal changes , plz listen to her: make her feel loved and secure. She’s still a child , manipulate her with kindness so she can give up on the wrong stuff .
I’d probably tell mine to pack her bags in the heat of the moment too. She is 14, ground her and stand firm, do not give in. Take away phone, laptop, computer, or anything that she really loves. Again STAND firm. If you say 30days grounded, make sure it’s the full 30 days not 29.
It’s illegal for her to be smoking to begin with. Who buys them for her? She’s 14 and if you kick her out there’s plenty out there that will target her for rape or sex trafficking. There has to be a better way.
No, but if you would have busted her fucking ass growing up then she wouldn’t act like this, she’s only 14.
Isn’t there an in between? Like take her phone away or grounded or something?
Seems kinda harsh but idk bc I know I wouldn’t put up w disrespect either
That’s a hard spot
FYI teen girls r evil! Buckle in for another couple yrs of the devil!
Maybe it’s time for a more professional assessment. Suggest you call Behavior Health Network or Child Guidance Clinic to get a more objective plan. BHN 733-6661 or CGC 732-7419. A 14 year on the streets is bigger problems.
Do her friends do drugs, or do they smoke weed? Also, is she smoking cigarettes, or weed, or crack, or?
Like cigs? I sneaked my mom’s all the time and never became addicted everyone is different of course jus don’t give her money. I wouldn’t kick her out just cuz of smoking cigarettes
Have her locked up!! Juvenile hall will teach her
Drug test, no more hanging with friends, no more phone, no more internet, no giving her any money, she doesn’t anywhere without you. Problem solved. She tries sneaking out, get a door alarm and if need be, screw the windows shut. Show you aren’t playing games. Also get her into chemical dependency therapy.
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Take everything out of her room except 7 outfits, her bed, blanket, pillow and a pair of shoes. Make it to where no friends and no phone!! Contact her friends parents and local pd foe drug testing
DM me if you want to know whats its like to live out of home at that age. I was kicked out too. If i can help at all let me know 
Start Smoking yourself … That’s what I did she stopped … But make sure you stop then !
Stop allowances, send her to therapy or an institution and limit her contact with those thugs
Restrict her money, fags arent free
Remind her who the adult is and whoop her ass then ground her!!! You definitely don’t need to kick her out you need to discipline her not turn your back on her. She’s a kid not a stray animal
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Whip that ass what the fuck are you doing.
Oh if no one else will say it I will!
That child needs a whooping and some coming to Jesus style parenting!
As a parent you do what you have to do to protect and teach your children right from wrong.
Put her out ? uh no but you take her stuff away take that bedroom door off the hinges bolt her window shut get some ring cameras and jerk her ass up and tell her you are the parent and she’s the child and she will abide by your rules period!
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Mend your relationship first
Lock her in don’t lock her out 
8 months broke my heart 
I will pray for you and her
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Send her to boot camp
Shame on you atleast she was honest
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Yeah…Kick her Ass😠
Oh and sift through her friends. I guarantee the answer will be there. Good friends. Good kid. Bad friends…
Make her eat the pack that will show her or beat her ass.
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OP getting dragged so hard RuPaul about to call them
Shes gonna resent you
Call C P S they can tell you what to do
Rudi Toner said it best.
Omg tell her hell no
Kicking her out is the stupidest thing you can do bc that pack she is running with? Guess what, you’re gonna return with a pregnant 14 year old. This is 2020 not the 60’s. You want her to act like she has some sense? Figure out what appeals to her from these new friends and remember ALL teens rebel and the more you’re an asshole to her the more she is gonna do it. Attempt to reason with her and for god sake get her on birth control and make sure she is taking it correctly. If tough luck as in grounding her, or taking away her privileges doesn’t work you can always go the “scared straight” tactic. Contact your local PD and ask them to intervene and give her a taste of what can happen when she hangs out with kids like that. Sex trafficking is pretty high rn and you’re gonna feel like a huge cunt if something like that were to happen. You carried her for 9 months and raised her (I assume,) to this point. Time to soldier up and do your job mama. Parenting isn’t for the week and it’s your job to guide and raise her through hell and high water.
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Go and tell her how much you love her. Text her if you have to. Please dont let her go:blue_heart:
tell her you don’t approve. You don’t want to see cigs or you toss em. You don’t want to smell it. Be There!! Be Everywhere with her. Her new, loving Best friend Don’t let her go:blue_heart: tell her you don’t want her to go… remind her you love ber:blue_heart:
I would get Dr involved
U need to beat her ass
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She needs ur compassion
Move her to a private school
Whoop that ass. Tough love.
I’ll say it again… WTF KIND OF MOM ARE
YOU?!!
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Two words - Military School
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Call the police to scare her.
My mum told me when I started smoking at 13, that if I wanted to smoke I had to pay for it and to never ask her for a cigarette… obviously I couldn’t afford it and neither could my friends so stopped but throwing her out won’t help plus there are ALOT worse things she could be doing so maybe pick ur battles with this one
Not wrong!!! You have to be firm in your beliefs, and stand firm with them!!! Smoking can’t happen and if she won’t listen, let her see how far she can get on her own!!!
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No phone, no devices, you pick her up and drop her off to school daily, she does her homework downstairs at the kitchen table and you keep the laptop after. Rules, consequences, boundaries.
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